


trollhunting with your troll

by MajesticTrash



Category: Tales of Arcadia (Cartoons), Trollhunters (Cartoon), Trollhunters - Daniel Kraus & Guillermo del Toro
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alpha Draal, Alpha Kanjigar, Alpha Steve, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Beta Barbara Lake, Beta Claire, Beta Mary, Beta Toby, Beta darci, Beta shannon, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Jim has feral behavior at times, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mating Rituals, Memes, Nesting, Omega Jim, Omega Verse, Romantic Fluff, alpha aaarrrgghh, alpha nomura, alpha vendel, beta dictatious, beta notenrique, beta walter, draal has no chill, draal is terrible at it, friends chilling together, in this fic i call him a hybrid though, jim is a half troll, mpreg down the line, omega ballustra, omega blinky, omega eli, sexy role playing, the friends and jim are all in college, the teachers are college teachers in this, trolls and humans live together, trolls can walk in sunlight, trolls have knots, trolls lay eggs in this, walter is the dean
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-14
Updated: 2019-06-01
Packaged: 2019-07-12 02:36:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 144,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15985826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MajesticTrash/pseuds/MajesticTrash
Summary: Jim's life is a nice one. His mate Draal helps see to that. Oh what could go wrong with a big burly troll as a mate?. a story about the two living life together and going about their lives in this fun filled fic!this is a super chill, fun, laid back fic! fluff and funny moments to be had!. wanted to make something to laugh and get feels from, and sexy times too~ no plot really, just fun chapters going along with their lives. oh what can college students really get up to with a world filled with trolls, magic, and dank memes?





	1. the new normal isn't easy around here

**Author's Note:**

> I AM. PRETTY PISSED. I had written a LOT more. my laptop died and I didn't notice until it was too late. I ended up not saving anything when i thought I did!, well point is  
> 1\. get ready for lots more chapters!  
> 2\. save very often now  
> 3\. time for fluff and fun!  
> this chapter was just thrown together from what notes i still had left in other folders. mostly a fun little time and world setting. plenty more chapters to come!

Arcadia. Home to many. In this world trolls and humans live together without fear. Trolls can go into the sunlight (cause why not) Jim is the only hybrid in the world (Merlin or the ‘intense drama’ of the show don’t apply, its a ‘just go with it and have fun’ thing) and hes the first ever omega trollhunter. A big 3 new records he holds as trollhunter! Omega, human, then hybrid! Many old trollhunters don’t approve, oh well who cares about some old dusty ghosts feelings right?. Kanjigar watches over and guides Jim and his son on this strange thing called life. (he’s going to be straight up Mufasa this bitch) 

With no real threats and fighting, things are pretty laid back. Sure the occasional goblin or gnome problem or settling nasty troll disputes, other than that, things are all good. Jim has proven himself time and time again to everyone, yet some still don’t fully ‘enjoy’ the fact of what Jim is, an omega trollhunter, (they don’t give Af about him being a hybrid). Still, he isn’t put down by comments and mean glares and the occasional cat call from some big brute alpha, HIS big brute alpha usually slams them to the ground until they apologize and promise to never again talk like that.

Draal Is now the permanent mate to Jim. A while back when they first became mates, Draal did a ‘troll proposal’ (something you will have to find out what that means in a future chapter!) and the two got mating carvings, a permanent thing to carve into your body, signifying your eternal courtship. What are those? Well they are symbols carved into you that match each other. (going to just base this off of how trolls get tattoos.) Kinda the troll equivalent of getting a heart with the other persons name on it. He has about as much love for Jim, his friends, his family really, as big as his body.

Barbara and Walt are happily married, and have been so for a few years now. It was very awkward at first, but what isn’t?. The four live together in their big loving home. Jim has come to really love Walt as his step father, meanwhile Draal….

Well the two don’t always see ‘eye to eye’. Meaning Draal still doesn’t trust the ‘impure’.  
“This ‘wedding ring’ must be cursed! The Bar Bruh ah (how it’s spelled in the books whenever he says her name) must be under his spell! Why else would she fall for him?!”  
“Love Draal”  
“I don’t think it’s that simple.”  
“Well technically love isn’t simple, so yeah I guess you’re right about it not being simple”

Walt can still switch between forms (why? Just go with it.)  
Notenrique (and from now on, just to make it easier, I’m just going to call him Noten.)  
lives with his ‘big sister’ Claire along with her parents and the actual baby Enrique.

Arrrg (yes, that’s how I’m going to spell it, easier) And Blinky are happily troll married. They gay Af. Living in trollmarket, and within their ‘loving home’ lives Blinky’s blind brother, Dic (yep. that’s how I’m saying it, 1 you know him. And 2, easier to spell)

Vendel is alive and chillin out in the heartstone, so that’s cool.  
I guess this would Technically be at the end of the ‘cannon’, but whatever it’s my Au so it don’t matter much! Here to have fun! Not stress out!.

All the friends are together being...well friends, doing what friends do.  
Everyone's aged up, why? Cause not really into underage stuff, anyways they all go to college together, and the teachers are there. why? My Au, just shut up and enjoy it XD.

Steve and Eli are dating, they gay AF for each other. Deal with it. Boyfriends gotta Creepslay together bruh!

Jim is the only hybrid, and everyone's chill about it and no one cares, trolls are common and so on. Plus Au. Does the janus order exist? Idk, doesn’t matter atm.

Draal has a nasty habit of “oh oh! Let me help! I can fix it!” at home, but just makes it so much worse. Oh well, they all love him and he tries his best. He loooves when Barbara gives him approval and love. It makes him feel like hes doing a great job being a big blue boy! He also wants her to love him because hes Jim’s mate. What proper mate doesn’t try to be kind to his parents mother? A monster that’s who! And not the good kind!

Barbara wants her boys to just get along. Jim is usually the bumper between the big blue boy and old knife man when Barbara isn’t around. (THIS IS CANNON!) Jim has his own little garden where he grows fresh vegetables. (they said in the books that its in the backyard). Now, its a fun little family garden for the four of them. 

Jim’s room is way bigger, cause the two need room! Also sometimes when Jim gets mad at Draal and kicks him out of the nest, Draal slinks to the basement downstairs to sulk. He is the type to always blame himself, even if Jim Is the one to have caused the argument. He always makes sure to improve himself when he messes up though. He wants to make Jim happy, and vice versa of course. The basement is bigger and has a large storage with many of Draal’s weapons (AU! Expect that answer to every question)

He also has the nasty habit of ‘collecting’ the things he loves, like regular trolls. So there will be things like tiny lights, a few dozen rolled up carpets he never intends to unroll, a mountain of home paint cans, opened and UN-opened, he ONLY lets them be used if Barbara wants to. No one else gets to touch. Not much of a problem since no one plans on re painting the house. A large amount of unopened sunflower seed packets (he loves the sound of them shaking), and honestly, etc. (prob am just gonna end up saying a bunch of other rando junk too).

Big blue ball boy has a few other nasty habits.  
1\. ‘in appropriate dinner conversations’. Including but not limited to:  
saying how well he properly breeds Jim, he wants to make sure everyone knows that he is NOT a selfish lover.  
Talking about how he has skillfully disemboweled opponents and in which ways.  
Talking about the cats he ate while digging through garbage bins, and what he FOUND in said garbage bins (no detail spared)  
and other such things.

2\. charging at the mailman thinking hes an opponent trying to break into their home.  
“DIIIEEEEE”  
“NO DRAAL NO!” Jim has to get in his way and stop him from going after the now screaming and running away mailman.  
At least now he no longer does it...he still watches him though. With zero trust.  
“He comes here everyday at the same time. he’s studying us for weaknesses.”  
“No Draal, that’s just his job”  
“I don’t buy it.”

3\. eating Jim’s cloths. Yes, Jim has found him more than once having a snack of his worn cloths. To Draal, they taste like how we taste candy or cakes. Poor Jim has to spend so much on re-buying his cloths. At least he knows how to lock them up or hide them now. Yes, Draal can never truly figure out how to undo baby proofed things. (I’m not trying to make him dumb, just funny dofus)

4\. Leaving his weapons lying around. More than once has someone tripped and even hurt themselves.

5\. following Jim around when he isn’t supposed to. Jim loves him and loves being with him. What Jim DOESN’T like is seeing Draal ‘sneak’ around the college trying to find him.  
“What are you doing here?? go home!”  
“I’m lonely, and I’m bored.”  
“Go to trollmarket!”  
“Blink and Arrrg aren’t for guests right now.”  
“of course not. Go fight someone then!”  
“OKAY!”  
“NO NOT HERE!”

5\. roaring at cars who honk at him

6\. falling into a deep sleep post orgasm on top of Jim. A firetruck could hit Draal and he wouldn’t even budge. Jim isn’t hurt, just stuck...and bored. Thankfully he has his phone! Oh shit it died. Well, guess he can sleep...

7\. watching soap operas when is isn’t supposed to.  
You heard me right. Soap operas. He ALWAYS tries his hardest to study human courtship so he can better improve himself to his love~. However its a TERRIBLE place to learn about love. He also loves the ‘human drama’ and watching them interact.  
“This one fleshbag woman said to another that ‘she stuffed her bra to look bigger’. I do not see how she has gained size from a bra.”  
“These two fleshbag woman are fighting over the same man. If this were trolls, they would fight to the death to prove who is more worthy than a mate, instead these two...what did they say...’talk shit get hit’ yet I see little fighting, only backstabbing.”

the family tries to not let him watch much, or else pick up bad habits.

8\. not understanding something and bringing it up, typically at terrible times.  
“Ba bruh ah, what is a MILF? I heard someone call you one”  
“What is dabbing and why does Toby keep asking me to do it?”  
“the other day they asked me what an ‘up dog’ was. I asked what’s up dog, they all laughed and cheered.”  
“one fleshbag woman called a man a cuckhold….what is that?”

9\. overall being a big fun rowdy boy.

10\. trying to make ‘home improvements’ without telling anyone. When a troll has a mate and they plan on having whelps down the line, the alpha will typically dig and create a bigger cave, making a nicer more comfortable larger living space to rely on for the soon to be whelp raising. (Jim and Draal DO plan on having kids, just not now. Jim isn’t ready, Draal ALWAYS respects Jim)

11\. always leaving messes everywhere, he has to constantly be reminded to clean up, he says sorry and does so right away, and makes it spotless!. 

(and other random stuff I’ll come up with later on).

Jim isn’t too ‘pure’ himself.  
HIS nasty habits consists of  
1\. eating things when hes not supposed to. With Draal, he always just eats the garbage and leftovers and literally anything they plan on throwing away. So he’s one big troll disposal system. Jim however, he will eat paperwork or too many utensils or actually chew and eat his pillows and blankets. More than once has he woken up to literally having cotton mouth. He also eats his pencils by mistake. Plenty of times where he’s chewed on a pencil trying to figure out something, then doesn’t realize that hes eaten it. Plenty of times where hes cooking, tastes a spoon and eats it without realizing it. (yes, in this AU he CAN make and eat good food.)

2.He does go a bit feral at times. He will bite you if you get all up in his face sometimes. Usually he only goes to his more ‘troll’ side when hes under heavy stress, typically when he’s in heat and very emotional. They go to the extremes. One minute hes wanting to be pet and laying on the couch, the next he might think someone’s trying to disturb his nest and he will go totally off the wall attack mode. Only seeing red and having a hard time ‘remembering’ who’s who.  
‘protect nest! Drive off intruders!’  
‘aggressive! Bite back!’  
‘don’t let them come into your territory!’  
he always feels awful for what he did after that. Always apologizing constantly and cries into a pillow before eating it. 

3\. his heat’s are EXTREME. when in heat, his emotions are off the charts, he gets very...tense. Growling and irritated at most things. He just wants a ‘calm no sudden movements, quiet, relaxed’ atmosphere. Or he WILL get bitey bitey.  
He also is constantly wanting affection and attention. He always just wants to cuddle and be pet, or almost always just stay around Draal~. When Draal is near, he can calm Jim down easily, making things under control. When he isn’t, Jim gets a bit...paranoid, more tensed up, anxious, etc.  
more than once has he growled when someone tries to come to close to his food.

4\. he does shed a lot at times, hairballs and clogged showers are common.

5\. he will pout and sulk in his nest, being a big grumpy fluff ball. Eating food while having the blanket over him. Watching sad things and having a terrible pity party.

 

Walt is always there for them, always making sure he’s available when needed. He’s the college dean and does his job well. Everyone knows hes a changeling and no body cares. Same with Nomura, shes still at the museum doing her thing. Barbara still works at the hospital and overall is still the same.

Toby and Arrrg don’t live together, although Arrrg does visit often. Blinky visits often, except is the type to just randomly drop by at any time without telling anyone first. Nobody minds, they expect the random visit from him at any given moment. Other than that, for the time being everything is the same as it is in cannon, unless I think of something else to add. If I do, I’ll just say the ‘update’ in the notes on future chapters. Anyways let’s begin the fun!

…………………...

“Names Jim, but you already knew that. Normal is a fun thing around Arcadia. Everything is simple and dumb. Just how we like it.  
Nothing says happy family like a loving human mother, a once head of the janus order changeling step-father, a hybrid son who’s the trollhunter, and a big blue ball boi troll. The ‘typical’ day consists of my friends and I hanging out, going to college, doing dumb ‘do it for the vine’ style things. We go shopping, go to the movies, walk around and watch sunsets. Pretty mundane, but we do know how to be reckless and keep it lively around here.”

“My two best friends are Toby and Claire, both human Betas. Steve, an alpha human, and Eli, omega human, are probably one of my favorite couples, they know how to have fun and nerd out. In no way are they the type to just want to watch the clock tick by. If its not ‘searching for cryptids’ or watching over the top fighting anime or going on the occasional date night, they’re usually with our friend group.  
Darci, Mary, and Shannon, all human betas, are all apart of our fun stupid happy go lucky group. Nothing says excitement like a bunch of dumb college students doing memes and crying over school together.”

“My two ‘adopted’ troll dads Arrrg and Blinky take good care of me, helping me train and learn and yadda yadda. Funny, at times my mom and Blinky argue over me.  
‘He should be doing this’  
‘no he should be doing this’  
Or sometimes I’ve gotten hurt and mom, being the doctor she is, helps me. Meanwhile Blinky feels that ‘human medicine’ sometimes isn’t good enough compared to trolls. The two get along great but bump heads from time to time. All in a usual days work I suppose.”

“I try not to cause too much trouble and help my ‘fellow troll’ out, being the trollhunter and all it’s kinda my job anyways. Still I don’t usually complain about it, I love it! Especially now that I don’t usually have life threatening events going on anymore. Grumpy old goat man Vendel tries to put up with our shit. He cares, but hes grumpy. He needs a long nap and tea. And a vacation.”  
“If I left trollmarket for even a single day, nothing but anarchy would occur!” while he is a stubborn old goat, his heart is always there for everyone. “

“Most people like me, I’m kind and friendly and ready to help!. There are still enough though that see me as a mistake. A misfit, well I love being one. Why be some boring typical person when I can be the fun misguided weirdo chillin like a villain. Being an omega, I do get ‘cat called’ by the bigger brute alphas. I share my words, Draal shares his fists, and horns, and ax. Anyone who’s smart though, knows not to say shit to me. Or at least not out loud when I’m nearby.”

“My training is fun, dangerous, but fun. Beats slumping over math problems yawning and trying to stay awake. Nothing wakes you up more than having a giant blade slice past your head. Also having fun spars with my friends, lighten up the mood, get competitive, make a game out of it. Good exercise too!. Nothing feels nicer than going home after a long day, kicking off your shoes, eating something good, hot shower, get cozy in your nest, and just hangout. Until your big troll mate comes into the room and wants to get cozy in the nest too~. Or actually just relax with you. My life is great, only things I have to really worry about is keeping everyone from dying, making sure that humans and trolls don’t try to kill each other and fight often, preventing my mate from killing my step father and everyone else as well, and making sure I stay sane. Easy peasy right?.”

 

“right now I’m sitting at the dinner table next to my mate, and across from my mom and walt. Those two are so sweet to one another and the romance is never dead. On their side, they share thoughts and ideas, talk about and drink wine. Plan out date nights or just something fun. Meanwhile on my side, I’m next to my mate who eats like hes on death row, wolfing down everything in sight. Including actual silverware. He’s messy, very messy, at least he is more than willing to clean up after himself. 

He’s hardly ever satisfied with the ‘usual’ dinners I make. He, like most troll’s, are NOT picky eaters. So we just round up whatever leftovers or things we don’t want anymore, put it in front of him, and watch him go. Within minutes a pile of food will disappear, leaving only minor amounts of anything that missed his mouth leftover. The only evidence showing what was once there, is now in the stomach of a troll. I do eat a LOT more than when I was human, and hey, some garbage DID taste good, but I got sick quickly, sometimes literally, of stuff. So I almost always stick to regular food. it’s also nice to just eat whatever wrapper I have left over from whatever was inside of it, no need to worry about throwing it away!.

The big brute can eat a ton! So we always make sure to stock up on plenty of stuff, another thing we don’t need to worry about is throwing away any thing we don’t have need for. Like plastic wrappers, or bags, or moldy food, or anything expired, and you get the idea. When something gets too old or worn down, chow time!. Only problem with his big appetite is that he tends to bring home his ‘own food’. We made him promise to stop eating cats. I won’t go into the details, but my point is he’s switched over to the food we provide. One time I found him eating an old tire we had in the garage, not a problem, we didn’t need it. Another pro than con, easy cleanup everywhere! Between the massive strength he has to help move things around like they were nothing, and the stomach to match, hardly anything was difficult to move around or get rid of.

Another bad thing his stomach tells him to do is eat my cloths. Not just the socks, but ALL of my dirty cloths. Apparently to him it tastes just like how cake and candy is to us. I’ve spent more money replacing cloths than most other things. Well, on the bright side, I grew out of pretty much everything. So a good excuse to go shopping. I’ve caught him red handed and told him to spit out what he hasn’t chewed. He always has that ‘shame’ look on his face, like a dog when they know they’ve done something bad. You can just never stay mad at the big dog. we’ve ‘baby proofed’ a lot of things around the house. He has a hard time getting into things, without breaking them of course. Either way it deters him from trying anything. He isn’t bad or anything, just a big doofus. He’s my doofus though, and our little family wouldn’t want him any other way….

Jim finished the last bits of food on his plate before getting up and putting the dirty dishes in the sink. Draal gave a hearty burp after finishing his own food. He excused himself then got up and put his own (what he hadn’t eaten) dishes in the sink.  
“You know, I really wish you’d let your mother cook more often. Her food is far better than yours...not that I’m saying you’re terrible! Just that...uh...” Draal tapped his fingers together. Jim just smiled and patted his arm 

 

“I get it, but not all of us like what my moms….food….is like...” one GREAT thing about Draal, he, for some reason, loves Barbara’s food. Jim will help teach her, the ‘attempt’ at whatever she was cooking got fed to Draal. He loved every bite and always asked for more. Good excuse for Barbara to practice with her son. 

Draal watched Jim clean up before asking to assist 

“That’s alright, I’ve got this. Why don’t you go get ready”  
“I am ready”  
“You sharpened you ax?”  
“of course”  
“And cleaned up your weapons?”  
“...i shall go do that” Draal turned around and headed down to the basement. Jim smiled, watching his mate shift his body and horns around to fit through the doorways. He was surprisingly good at that. 

It wasn’t long after that the two said goodbye to Barbara and Walt.  
“Oh sweetie have fun and be safe” Barbara kissed her son’s cheek.  
“I will mom, for both of those things.”  
“You know how I worry”  
“I know you do. Well even if for some reason I might get into a fight, Draal’s there with me. Aaaand you know he’s literally willing to kill on the spot.”  
“Please make sure he doesn’t” Draal walked out of the basement. hearing that he walked over and said with a nod  
“I promise I will not take a life this night.”  
“and no starting fights?”  
“...I will not start them. But I will defend Jim’s honor.”

“Well close enough. Alright boys have fun, don’t stay out to late” Barbara kissed both their cheeks as they left. Tonight was going to be a fun night. Somehow Noten managed to convince the ‘fair Claire’s’ Family to let him throw a party. He promised he’d keep it from going all out explosive and no cops will be called AND nothing will be broken. Now THAT was a hard promise to keep. Luckily he always knew how to clean up after everything. So they gave him the benefit of the doubt….

Earlier that evening when Jim was cooking, his phone rang and he answered to a ‘cheery, trying to convince you cause he wants something’ Noten.  
“Heeeyyy! How’s my favorite omega doin?”  
“Alright, making dinner”  
“heyyy soooo I had something to ask ya”  
“what? Is it ‘protection’ from some shady trolls who you made some underhanded deal with?”  
“aye! I don’t do nothin under the table no more! Too risky. Besides I knew you would say no anyways.  
No, I’ve come to ask my dear dear omega friend to come on over to this little shindig I’m havin. You would be our celebrity guest! The true V.I.P! You would REALLY be a big deal!”

“Thanks but no thanks.”  
“Awww come on! You know you wana have fun! Parties started and havin the trollhunta will make this into a legend for the ages! Or at least until I throw another one”  
“I’m good thanks, last time I came to one, every drunk alpha hit on me, then Draal hit on them and almost beat them all to death.”  
“Big lovin sweet heart you got, drives me to tears. Pleeaaassseee!”  
“How did anyone even give you permission?”  
“I pulled a few strings, cried a bit, and did a sweet plead”  
“….I’m not saying yes, but who’s going to be there?”  
“Everyone! Well the important people...I doubt Vendel will show up, old guys not the party type. Besides, don’t cha wana see Arrrg get drunk and headbutt people?”

Jim smiled, when Arrrg was drunk he got VERY rowdy ‘playful’. It was a sight to see. He was a gentle giant, with a frat boy in his head at times.

“That is a nice thing to see...”  
“Toby is gonna be here! Wana watch him get drunk and cry?”  
Toby was the type to just let everything out and need a shoulder to cry on.  
“Maybe...”  
“Claire and her friends will be here”  
Claire was the type to rarely get drunk, when she did, she was the type to laugh at everything.  
“I thought she would, like she would leave you alone.”  
“Those two litte lovers will be here”  
“Really? They agreed?”  
“Yep!”  
Steve and Eli rarely went to parties. Eli never cared about them, meanwhile Steve loved them. They made a deal of coming to this one, since they knew there friends would all be there. Steve was funny when he was drunk, he would always take any dare. One time Eli spilled something on his jacket and he had to take it off. He threw it on a couch and when drunk Steve came over, he thought there were two boyfriends. He cried and said he was NOT the type to cheat. He cried and promised it wasn’t his fault. He was loyal like that. Someone recorded it and showed everyone else. It was a great time. Eli was never drunk, maybe a bit buzzed but that was about it. 

He always made sure to try and be one of the ‘responsible’ types.  
“What about Blinky?”  
“You know he would come anyways. You know he wouldn’t leave Arrrg alone at any party.”  
Blinky was never the one to drink. He would enjoy partying, but he never cared much for REAL partying. He always rounded everyone up and kept them from getting into too much trouble, especially, and mostly, Arrrg. Arrrg would drunkenly walk over and hit on Blinky.  
“Were mates already”  
“Really?! With me?!”  
“YES!”  
“oohh….so wana go out?” Blinky would sigh and decide to take him home.

Draal hardly ever got drunk. Not because he didn’t party, no he did at times. Not because he wanted to stay sober, although he always made sure to have some sort of ‘control’ over himself. ‘a warrior must always be aware of their surroundings!’ he would say. When he DID start to get a buzz, his hunger for violence skyrocketed. He and Arrrg looooved to fight. Causing a LOT of damage, mostly to their environment around them.

 

“Alright. You convinced me. I’m only staying for a little bit though, you hear me?”  
“Loud and clear. Okay, no need to bring anything except that fun attitude!”

 

………………………………….

The house was blasting with music and flashing multi colored lights. Jim didn’t even need to knock on the door, as soon as he walked onto the porch Noten opened up the door  
“Heyyy! There he is! Alright hurry up and get inside! Oh and uh...you got a pen? Nah who cares! I can find one. Anyways I got some people I need you to meet reaaaaaal quick. Sign a few things, take a few photos and there we go!”  
“Suddenly I have to do work?”  
“i did say you were the celebrity!”  
“So now everyone wants to meet me?”  
“nooo! Not everyone! Just a few...out of towners. That’s alllll!” Jim rolled his eyes and headed inside. His ears had already started to ring as music blasted an attack onto his eardrums. Noten told Jim to follow him. Draal went off by himself and had somehow already gotten into a fight.  
“Here he is! Like I promised!” Noten said as a group of angry looking trolls looked the two up and down.  
“Good. You kept you promise, we’ll keep ours.” Jim raised an eyebrow and looked at Noten. He just smiled a worried expression in reply. So Jim had started to give his autograph out (surprisingly he actually had to develop one. After becoming well known, many people wanted to meet him. Get hugs, signatures, pictures, you name it.) take some photos and the like. A half hour went by until he finally finished up. The once angry looking trolls seemed pleased and then hastily left the party. 

 

“Okay, tell me what happened.”  
“whaaat? Can’t a changeling just promise a few people to get his best friend the trollhunter to do a quick meet and greet?” Jim didn’t buy It. That was clear on his face.  
“...okay okay, stop lookin at me like that. I may or may not have...agreed on something that I didn’t realize until much later that...well….i couldn’t exactly...’make a quota’. So before I lost my head, I promised I could get them to meet cha! At first, they didn’t believe me! So I invited them over-to the party! Yep! I totally threw this just for fun and not a total cover up! So they waited...and uh….well thankfully you came over before anything nasty happened!. You really are such a sweet heart”

“I thought you said you quit doing shady business!? I AM the trollhunter! I make sure stuff like that DOESN’T EXIST. I’M LITERALLY THE TROLL POLICE!”  
“Yeah, but your me friend! Aaaannnnnddd you love me! Aaaaannnnd..uh….and you wouldn’t want anythin happinin to me! Besides I promise, after this whole…..well anyways, I swear on me mothers grave that I won’t do ANYTHIN like this again. Trust me, I don’t plan on it. You were LITERALLY my only way out. Phew! Am I the luckiest changeling or what?”

“yeah. Lucky. I need a drink.”  
“You’ve earned it!”

Noten jumped up on Jim’s shoulders and yelled out loud to the crowd  
“TROLLHUNTAS HERE! TIME TO REALLY. CRANK. THIS. UP!”  
everyone roared in agreement.  
so the party went on and crazy stuff happened. (just imagine, sorry but I am still super pissed and upset)

 

…………………  
Jim opened his eyes, the sunlight was harsh and he felt like he was almost blind. His head felt like Gunmar had split it in half with his sword. Jim opened his eyes more, trying to sit up and looking around. After a few minutes of just trying to get his head to wake up fully, he realized he was still in Claire’s house, laying on her couch. He noticed the house was….spotless.  
“There’s me trollhunta!” Noten said in a friendly greeting  
“wh...a..”  
“Take it easy, here, drink this water, its also got some aspirin.” Jim took it and practically chugged it.  
“what...time is it?”  
“1:30pm.”  
“WHAT?!”  
“You had fun last night”  
“Okay...what happened? I don’t remember anything...i blinked once and suddenly I’m laying on the couch”  
“Well...uh….quick question, you REALLY don’t remember ANYTHIN?”  
“nothing...” Noten make a ‘phew’ face. Jim started to scowl  
“What happened….why do you look like that.?”  
“nothin….well….long story short. Shit got real, you had to step in, big fight, lots more drinking, you started to eat the house, then...might have made love to Draal in Claire’s room. Man you were SHITFACED! I think you drank the strong stuff. Anyways we all had fun! Claire’s bed is pretty much ruined….geez you two are rough and tumble!. How the hell you survive anythin is beyond me. Anyways. Oh and Arrrg chugged two bathtubs of glug in one go! He did it like he was takin shots!”

“okay...go back….”  
“to what?”  
“the fight for one thing!”  
“ohh….well some trolls were getting rowdy. Two alphas saw the same omega, got horny and jealous, and drinking and arguing over getting laid don’t mix well. So a trollhunta broke them up, then Draal broke them. Mostly cause you got a TERRIBLE blow to the head. you’re fine though! don’t worry, we checked you to make sure all the bolts in ya brains still were in the right place, they were.”  
“okay...eating the house?”  
“yeah by then you were laughing and really just going with the flow. We ran out of snacks and before we replaced them, you started to just munch on the walls, chairs, pillows, hell even the dam ceiling fan! Now THAT was an awesome sight!. We had to get you away before you ate everything else.”  
“okay. Now….the last part..”  
“well, we didn’t want you eatin the house like a dam termite. You were drunk and crying cause...how did it go again…..OH YEAH! So, you kept hitting on Daal, asking if he had a mate. He said yes. You cried and yelled at him cause you felt like he was stringing you along. Draal said he was dating you, Jim. Then you got mad cause he was dating someone who ‘stole yer name’. So more arguing. Draal just kinda left and then got into some fight, I don’t know, I missed it. 

 

Well he was blood thirsty, you were horny. Put two and two together, and you both had a nice calm night~. We hardly got you two into Claire’s room! I was tempted to just let you both fuck on the floor. But I knew you would make too much of a ‘mess.’ and shit was I right! The sheets were nearly soaked!. Big guy really is big all around. So It was...what, 5am when I started to do me cleanin. Of course I had to move you both, Draal I got out of the house, he actually forgot you! I was tempted to call him but I needed to get cleanin. So with a little help, I moved ya down here after I finished up in the living room. And that was that.”

“Okay...what about Claire? Oh god….i...i don’t remember anything….”

“oh she was...well point is she wasn’t too ‘happy’ about her room. So shes out shopping for new sheets, rug, and a mattress. Those things were stained and torn up! I’m also surprised the dam bed legs managed to stay unbroken.”  
“yeah..his spikes are nasty. We figure out how to work around them at home...oh Claire..i need to say sorry”  
“Already did! You mumbled it in your sleep. Shes still pretty mad though. Parents are out with the baby doin somethin, I dunno, well I decided I owned it to ya to look after ya until you woke up. And here we are! Now get out”  
“Gee thanks for looking after me. Ugh...i feel like I died...”  
“yeah that’ll happnen to ya. You sure had a good time last night! Truly were the life of the party! Even out played Arrrg! You might also wana shower the second you get home. don’t exactly smell like a daisy.”  
“UGH. I smell like Draals-...anyways...Well...i did something fun I guess….” Jim tried to stand up, he was wobbly and fell back down. Noten rolled his eyes and help him up. Jim managed to call and get a ride home from his mom. She didn’t chew him out, seeing his condition. She just told him how worried she was and is happy he’s okay. Even if he didn’t feel like it. Once he got home he showered and ate something, brushed his teeth and kept chugging water throughout the day (tip. Alcohol causes hangovers and cotton mouth because it dehydrates you. Drink up a shit ton of water and you’ll be gtg. Well mostly) Draal and Jim cuddled and quietly relaxed the rest of the day. Well, that’s yet another ‘fun’ day in the life of Jim the hybrid omega trollhunter.


	2. I bet you a pining Draal.  well I raise you a Jim in heat.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter: Draal has exposed his true feelings. nothing says i love you more like a fight to the death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMUT ALERT! I really don't know how to write it, so i hope you enjoy what i did write. leave a comment and tell me how I'm doing! not just with the smut, but the story overall i mean

It was wrong. he knew it was. it was an invasion of privacy. ESPECIALLY because it was a nest. an omegas nest is a sacred thing after all. something not to be disturbed or handled by anyone else but the omega owning it.

Draal breathed. trying to steady himself. Jim was gone along with Walt and Barbara. So that left him all alone at the house. The family let Draal live with them, he was very close to them, and they enjoyed his company. He happily agreed to stay, always making sure he pulled his own weight around the house. 

He was Jim’s friend and guardian....nothing more. Draal was standing in the doorway to Jim’s room now. it...smelled so heavily of the omega. Jim’s scent was...intoxicating, Addicting, especially since Jim was about to go into another heat soon. Draal sniffed around, his natural instincts controlling him, smelling the thing he ached for most, Jim. He tried to stop himself, from thinking lustful thoughts. Draal’s heart hurt when he thought about his secret deeper feelings for the hybrid.

"bleh. ugh." Draal muttered under his breath, shaking his head.  
“enough of this foolishness!” He told himself. However, no matter how much he wanted to, he simply couldn’t walk away...this was his chance...his sinful chance...  
“He isn’t your mate! do not disturb his room anymore than you have to! Check it and be done with all this” Draal mentally tried to work his head out of his deeper feelings. Clearing his mind completely. 

“I’m just making my rounds, a routine I’ve done more times than i can count...I’m just checking...that’s all. Nothing more, nothing new”. it was a fact. he really was just checking….but...he couldn’t shake out the nagging feelings slowly speaking up in his head. Draal slowly took one step into the room. Afraid of putting too much weight on it, as if it would suddenly break under it, something that surprisingly has never happened before. then he took another step, and another. eventually he was right next to Jim’s nest.

 

He gulped as his heart started to pound. he was infatuated with Jim. a 'curse' hes had for a while now. In the beginning he simply thought highly of the trollhunter, then thought of him as a great ally, then loved him like a friend....then...the affection peaked...and he suddenly started to see Jim...differently. everything he did. made Draal’s heart swell and pound. Simple things like his laugh, his smile, his hugs, being allowed to pet him, listening to his purrs and compliments, spending time with him, training with him. although, now its far more dangerous, simply because now Jim had the keen senses like that of a troll. He could easily smell Draal’s arousal from here on out.

 

Draal’s biggest fear was Jim finding out. Causing Jim to disown him, being creeped out by him, being humiliated by everyone for his feelings, causing his father to feel ashamed of having him for a son, for lusting after his successor. Someone he was supposed to be HELPING, TRAINING, PROTECTING, not being lustful towards him and thinking of him as a potential mate. He also feared others forcing him out of their lives for his thoughts. So Draal swallowed down his feelings as deep as possible. ignored everything. pushed past it. Shunned them. Hid them from the very light of life.

 

he denied his heart what it wanted., only to have it rise up even more. At times...he had... intense and uncontrollable moments....he sinned....one of his biggest secrets was that hes more than once pleasured himself to the thoughts of Jim. Imagining Jim aching for Draal’s loins, begging for whelps, wanting to be dominated, lusting for his knot. 

 

Draal always felt dirty post orgasm. regret pooling around and drowning him in it. A dark bottomless sea that swallows him up and never lets him breathe. he felt shame, far more than he ever felt in his life. He would gladly trade it for a hundred moments of him being booed, having trash thrown at him, and gawked at for loosing his honor in the fight Jim challenged him to all those years ago. He felt as if he was breaking his oath to protect Jim. The ultimate betrayl of trust, the ultimate unforgivable back stab. The trust he was given, he was ruining it by spilling his seed to the perverted enjoyment of his thoughts of Jim. sometimes he would actually pleasure himself WITH Jim’s cloths. Jim’s scent driving him to his most base desires.

He would wrap the clothing around his cock and knot, eventually soaking it in troll seed. he always quickly put them into the washer. making sure the scent didn’t linger in the basement air. he tried to avoid Jim, avoid everyone after those moments. feeling nothing but shame and embarrassment for what he had done. Occasionally he didn’t have enough time to clean, or hide them. so he ate them. its not like hes never tasted his own seed before, doing so as a curious whelp more than once.

He didn’t have any opinion about it. All he simply cared about was getting rid of the evidence. whats worse, Jim would always thank him for watching the house or helping to clean it or being such a good friend to him. Draal would be hugged and cuddled on. Given praise for doing so well around the house and friendship. Not only that, but Jim being an omega, Jim naturally loved the attention he got from alphas, so getting affection from Draal made Jim feel good. He would purr and thank Draal for being pet or hugged or held or just comforted overall.

 

Draal felt like he would die right then and there in those moments. if Jim ever found out....if anyone did...Draal shook his head, coming back into the present. he always got a terrible knot of illness and bile in his stomach when he thought these things. he ignored the lust starting to get to him...the warm...soft...fertile scent....just....hanging in the air...ready to be buried into the nest...being bred...begging for- 

‘no. stop thinking. just check on his room and leave’ he thought, not noticing that he was now nuzzling against Jim’s nest. his blankets and pillows...so fresh...so...wonderful…  
He couldn’t help put touch and feel, to gently grope and caress the nesting materials. Draal moaned into them. He wanted Jim. he would sell his soul for Jim. Not just for sex. but to just be mates. to love him. to hold him in a way mates would, not friends. 

Of course...he would LOVE the sex. he would bring Jim pleasure like Jim never knew existed. he would be generous. Always help Jim reach complete satisfaction, never once leaving him UN-pleasured in any way possible….. he dug his nose deeper into a pillow.

‘I could...take one....just...one....he has so many...and could easily replace it...Jim does that all the time..i would treasure the pillow...love it...make love to it....just one pillow...just this once....or even a blanket...i could put it around myself...make it feel like I was around Jim...its so soft too...so...so soft...just...one item...that’s all…' Draal reached in and carefully retrieved a blanket, one he thought would easily go unnoticed and have another be put in its place. Draal decided to go with a moderate one. not big. not small. not something that will be missed or even noticed gone. Draal drank in the scent. it was his now...all his...he promised he would take the best care for it...as if it were his child...keep it safe and soft and...

‘no NO NO NO STOP!'  
Draal shook his head and hit himself. what would his father think of him?! betraying the trollhunters trust! all because of his emotions were getting the better of him...oh....oh no...he didn’t even consider one important fact...his scent was on the pillow and blanket...he didn’t have enough time to wash it.…  
'i...i just tripped on them...yeah...yeah and i put them back...' he told himself. he carefully put the blanket back. even shuffled it deeper in, to make sure it wouldn’t even be noticed at all. the pillow too. 'if anyone asked. that’s what i would say. forgive me father. everyone. i cannot let my alpha take control of me. that is not the way of a true friend.'

 

Draal shook his head. this place was a death trap to him. a maze of terrible events just waiting to happen. if he lost control...he might as well pleasured himself and spilled his seed all over Jim’s  
Nest. soaking it. making sure his scent was heavy. making his lust known. making sure Jim would know how virile he is. making him want to invite Draal during his heat. become lovers. Show just how much of an alpha stud he was. partners in sexual encounters. 

Draal’s loins stirred at that long stream of perverted thoughts.  
'do it...soak it with your seed...let him bury himself into the scent...cause him to give him...let you love him...imagine those lustful eyes...his whining for you...his begging with need...telling you you’re the only alpha he wants... ‘  
“mmmh..." Draal moaned aloud at the thought.  
'no no stop! no more of this nonsense!'  
Draal had to leave. he quickly checked the window. all clear. he left as quickly as possible...but...he didn’t want to leave without a 'memento'.  
'its...just payment for my services...no...no a guardian should NOT receive compensation! my trust and love that i receive from them is what i should be paid with!' Draal couldn’t stop himself.  
he found a worn shirt next to a basket of dirty cloths. how much he just wanted to- no. no enough. he means it this time. 

he shuddered and lost himself. he snaged the shirt and headed downstairs and into the basement as quickly as possible.  
'i still have time. i still have time' Draal repeated in his head. he undid his kilt and touched himself to Jim’s shirt. breathing it in. he was so pent up from that ‘little moment’ he had in Jim’s room, as well as those filthy thoughts from just moments ago. it fueled him. he didn’t last long at all. he wrapped the shirt around his cock and knot then stroked himself with it. within 5 minutes of imagining the young omega moaning out Draal’s name, being knotted, rutting against Draal, crying for his whelps, wanting to be filled with the alpha’s seed

…..finally….Draal came.

The shirt dripped with seed. Draal always was a 'mess maker'. he was virile. too much for his own good. he just let himself sit there. drunk on lust and orgasm. Letting his thoughts play over and over as the warm sensual sounds and images mixed with the intense high from the orgasm. he wanted to just lay there forever. hold Jim against his chest, listen to his purrs of satisfaction, Being thanked on how amazing of a lover he was. 

He wished to death that his dream would come true. he imagined them courting, getting matting carvings, Jim being pregnant, having Draal’s whelp, them raising a family, kissing even, he wanted to try it with Jim. Them cuddling, loving, doing romantic things. Draal bringing him offerings of his spoils of victory. trophies from beasts he'd slain in Jim's name. Draal drowned in his dream. in his bliss. Why couldn’t this be real? what did it take for him to get Jim’s attention. to get Jim to be his mate!…

he was too afraid to say anything. if Jim rejected his advances...and then things would be awkward...and  
Ruining their friendship...it was a chance he did NOT want to take... no matter what the payoff. If only he could just see what the future would foretell if he took the chance. Draal sighed heavily, those thoughts dampened his post orgasm high. However he didn’t realize how long he was in bliss for. he heard the door open upstairs 

"were home Draal!" Jim’s voice echoed through the basement. Draals eyes opened faster than he could think. he got up.  
‘bushigal. the mess. the scent. the shirt. the dripping seed…..oh no...the shirt. it was one of Jim’s favorites. Surely THAT would be noticed if it went missing….’ he had no choice. he shoved it into his mouth, still soaked. he swallowed it down. he grabbed towels and cleaned himself up along with the mess as quickly as he could. Then he proceeded to eat those too. Draal couldn’t be seen like this. he couldn’t be smelled like this. Jim would know. Jim would be mortified! Then the secret would be exposed and his life would be ruined. All because his nature took control of him.

 

Draal looked around. sure he COULD open the window, but that little air wouldn’t clear out the heavy lust in the air. Suddenly Jim’s voice echoed through the house.  
"Draal? Where you at big guy? you downstairs? I got something for you! I picked it out just for you!" 

….of course. Jim was kind enough to even give him a gift. Draal felt so unclean. literally and  
mentally.  
'how could he give in!? what is wrong with me! Jim is...was my friend! And now I’m breaking the trust! I’ve ruined everything! all because i couldn’t control myself!”  
"you down here?"  
Jim opened the door. Draal panicked. he just stood there out of fear. then slowly opened the window, sprayed an ‘air freshener’ scent bottle everywhere (little good that would do.), and then hid behind the heater.

 

"hey Draal, so i...Draal?" Jim looked around. he didn’t see his friend. but then it hit him. he sniffed the air. more and more.  
"huh...mmh..." Jim closed his eyes and kept sniffing.  
Jim loved the scent...why?...it smelled like...vanilla...and...sex?  
‘did Draal have sex? he wasn’t mated. he...he must have just been touching himself.’ Jim giggled. ‘even trolls have needs. speaking of...’ Jim needed his own to be tended to. The feeling of his heat felt like it was coming as fast as a train. he left the gift next to the heater and then headed upstairs, not noticing the big blue naked troll. Draal didn’t dare come out of hiding until it was a few minutes later. he peaked out of his hiding place, checking to see if anyone was there. no one was there of course. he grabbed the box and opened it out of curiosity. it was a small colorful sword. a child’s toy made out of plastic. Jim knew he loved weapons. Draal smiled. even simple things like this made him feel appreciated. even though it had NO ACTUAL FUNCTION in battle. it was still cute and pleasing to the eye. for a split moment Draal forgot his own sin while being mesmerized by simple innocence.. until he realized he was still a mess.

Now he couldn’t clean himself up with the family being home. well, he could take the pathway out to the sewers only....it was all patched up now...he helped them fix it. Draal sighed  
"bushigal..."  
he couldn’t go upstairs. he could NOT fit through the window. he looked around for something, ANYTHING to help provide a proper answer. no matter how much he wiped himself with laundry, he would only put his scent on them, along with never getting rid of HIS scent either. he needed to bathe it off. he couldn’t go into the bathroom now, and he couldn’t just walk outside.

 

He debated on what to do. he decided to try and sneak. Yes true, he was a big and vicious troll, and he knew that he could NEVER hide well or be stealthy, but he has to try. he gathered his kilt and put it back on. at least he wont be naked. only a few times has he wandered around in the nude here. he didn’t want to be seen by them, not that he had any problem with nudity, it was as common to trolls as cloths were. The only two problems he had was that Jim would see his arousal, and the same with the others. The other reason was because the Barbara, Jim, and Walter didn’t want him walking around naked. so he didn’t do it when anyone was around.

 

Draal opened the door just a crack, and of course it groaned. as did he. looking around he realized no one was there. he heard laughter from the backyard. he breathed a sigh of relief and headed upstairs quickly.  
"Draal..." he heard his name whispered. he froze. he was caught. he looked around. the sound was Jim’s voice, coming from his room. the door was closed though.  
"draal...ahhh..." was Jim injured!? Draal very well couldn’t just leave him be! but...he couldn't let him see and smell him like this!  
"draaall....ahhhh!" Jim whisper louder, moaning out his name. Draal ignored the shower. his friend was in trouble! he went over and opened the door 

"trollhunter are you alright?! i heard moans of distress and...my name...." Draal stopped dead in his tracks. he was so shocked. he was utterly stunned....Jim was naked.. laying in his nest. fingering himself and jerking himself off. Jim looked just as stunned.  
'was....was this a dream? was he still asleep in the basement?' Draal thought. neither one spoke. they just stared at one another in shock. it hit Draal like a truck. the scent of arousal. the scent of an omega who just started their heat....Draal couldn’t help but breathe it in. 

'if this is a dream. no one wake him...'  
"D-draal...i...i can explain..."  
"no need...troll....hunter...i...uh..."  
"i....i...." the two were silent once more. it was a few intense moments. they both held their breath. as if the world itself was stunned and frozen around them. Both waiting for something to happen. then they both heard the backdoor open. Draal panicked and closed the door behind him, entering the room then locking it. 

"i...didn’t want...them to....see...." Draal swallowed and spoke nervously. he was in the room  
with Jim. Jim...a horny...fertile...omega...the one he lusted for.... the one he longed for...this wasn’t real. he had to tell himself. it CLEARLY couldn’t be.  
"Draal...i...I’m in heat...i...I’m so sorry...i hate myself..." Jim covered himself with a blanket and  
curled up into a ball then wept  
"i...i didn’t...i didn’t mean....i...i couldn’t think of....and then...i remembered you...then....” 

 

"its alright trollhunter..no need to weep...do...you want...me...to...come...into your nest? For….company…?" Draal swallowed. this was it. if he was rejected. then the world would break for him.  
"do...you want to?"  
"i...would lie if i said i didn’t..."  
"Draal...i...i want...you to come in my nest...with...me...please...h-help me...i...i don’t want....to be alone..." 

 

Jim whined under his blankets, peaking a bit of his head out, showing very lustful needy eyes. suddenly Draals whole body went into auto pilot. his alpha nature took over. All his head could repeat was  
‘fertile. needy. omega. fertile. needy. Omega.’ his mind chanted. he walked onto all fours and walked into the nest. sniffing it. to think, he was doing this not to long ago. Jim took the blanket off slowly. showing himself. his body. his new troll body. it was so...smooth...except for the patches of fur...they both looked at one another.. 

"...i....i don’t mean...i...you're just...such a big...powerful alpha...and...i smelled you..and...my heat...and....alpha" Jim whined. his body screamed for Draal.  
'strong. virile. alpha. strong. virile. alpha'  
"alpha~" Jim whined even louder. Draal purred deeply in response. he had the green light. his dreams were about to come true. he fully entered the nest. slowly, as if stalking his prey. he was above Jim now. he nuzzled into him. taking in his strong arousal. Jim did the same. Draal purred, while Jim whined. then...they nuzzled more. bit at one another...then they caved in....their natures guiding them.

 

it was 2 hours later. they both laid in the nest panting and huffing. totally out of breath. Jim was the only one sweating, since trolls don’t sweat, draal didn’t. Jim just looked over at Draal, who looked back at Jim.  
"can...can i have more?" Draal gulped. he was spent. he had nothing left to give.  
"i...i have nothing left...I’ve given you everything."  
"i..i need more~"  
"please...I’m so sore and tired"  
Jim mewed and climbed onto Draal’s chest. rubbing it and looking lustful, greedy, hungry. Draal’s chest wouldn’t stop rising and falling rapidly. this wasn’t a dream. did his prayers be heard?! did a wish become reality?!  
“Alpha~”  
"please...mercy"  
"no mercy~"

a total of 5 hours. Draal’s mind went to regret. This was no dream. It was a nightmare. He had fought countless times, endured too many wounds to remember, became scarred over. This, this was something he just couldn’t overcome. He was just so sore, even more sore than the most intense training he’s ever done in his life. His loins were so raw, they felt so painful. He had no sensitivity there. He was so thankful that the omega, the hungry, lustful, endlessly needy, omega had finally fell asleep on his chest. Draal had an arm wrapped around him, holding him close. Jim had tucked himself under Draals chin. He was sound fully asleep and making deep satisfied purrs.

Draal’s mind flickered the very last moments of Jim’s final orgasm while riding his alpha  
“I LOVE YOU DRAAL!” he yelled out. Draal didn’t have any seed left. He had already been drained from his own pleasure, then by the third hour of love making with Jim, he officially had nothing left to give. Yet the omega demanded more. Draal would have never thought of Jim having this kind of libido. Draal had met PLENTY of troll’s with intense ones. This, this was far more intense than any of them. Humans are greedy hungry creatures, Jim takes both worlds, his emotions were far more heightened than either side. Causing Jim to have a more fluid and enduring sex cravings.

With how intense troll emotions were, mixed with how fluid and rapid humans were, it made Jim into an emotional monster. He was fine almost always, but things did push him over the edge and he would go feral. ESPECIALLY during heat. He usually was always at about 20-100 on an average day. In heat though, it was 80-100. it didn’t take much to trigger him. It wasn’t his fault, it just was his new nature mixed with his old one. 

Draal’s mind couldn't stop looping that moment Jim yelled that statement. That one statement Draal has begged to hear. Now that it had happened….he didn’t like it. He LOVED it. However…..Jim was in heat. His nature was controlling him. Did he REALLY mean it? Or was his nature just driving him over the edge and causing him to say it as if it were a side effect. All of this….it meant nothing...did it? The attention, the love, the companionship, nothing. This was just Jim’s heat speaking. He meant none of it. This greatly depressed Draal. It wasn’t real after all.

Draal groaned, his heart stung badly, almost as much as his loins. The one thing hes always wanted, it wasn’t real. It was like if someone was starving to death and found food, only to discover it was fake plastic molded ones.

Draal decided to just stop thinking. He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. He didn’t want to think anymore. All this joy suddenly turned to sadness. The last things his brain registered was Jim’s pleasured purrs on his chest…

……………………………….  
the morning had come and gone, Jim woke up, got off Draal, showered and got ready for the day. Draal did the same. Neither one spoke to one another. They both went about their day as if nothing had happened. Draal wasn’t sure what to make of this. He NEEDED to know what Jim was thinking...but...what if it was just something that DIDN’T matter. That Jim didn’t want to think about. Draal couldn’t help but always stare at Jim, looking in his direction with a sad heart.

He couldn’t wait. His heart hurt to much. He would rather know, he wanted to risk it. He couldn’t possibly hurt anymore than he did now. When the two were alone, Draal walked up to Jim.  
“Jim….i….i wish to speak...with...you”  
“hm? Oh sure big guy, what’s up” Jim just sounded so….normal, his usual upbeat attitude as always was in his body, face, and voice.  
“i...i….i need to...speak...about...last night”  
“oh, sure, what about it?”  
“what...did...that mean? I...i beg for forgiveness….i took advantage of you in your coniditon. If you hate me and no longer wish to see me, I fully understand. I will leave.”  
“what? No way! I wanted it! Actually I was afraid I was taking advantage of YOU!”

“what?” Draal was more stunned then he was yesterday, somehow.  
“Yeah...i wanted to say sorry...i know you wouldn’t have been interested...but….nature said otherwise huh?...yeah..I’m sorry of begging for sex...”  
“no NO I was NOT used! I enjoyed it...i…..if we are being honest….i….i need to talk to you fully.”  
“sure, we got time”  
“what did….what are….we?”  
“friends! We just sorta...fucked. We both wanted it, we both needed it, we did it, and here we are! Nothings changed, I actually really REALLY liked it. Wow! You are amazing! I mean, I’ve had sex a few other times, not many, but still! How you don’t have a mate yet is beyond me!” Jim laughed and smiled. Draal was just...more confused. He wasn’t sure what to make of Jim’s feelings and thoughts on the situation. Draal just blurted out  
“i love you.”  
“..huh?”  
“I’ve grown...affection for you..for...a long time now...i...you must think of me in disgust. I broke your trust, your favor. I feel ashamed of myself for having feelings towards you. You are my friend, nothing more. Yet my heart wouldn’t stop talking to me. I did not want anything to change. I knew it would only make things worse if my true affections for you were exposed. I hid them as well as I could. Then...when you became….you are one of the most beautiful creatures I had witnessed. My heart only swelled even more. Now, you could smell my arousal. I...i distanced myself from you. I did not want to ruin...our friendship, not just yours, but everyone’s. All would look on me with shame that I was in their company. My life, along with yours, would be different. Too different. And my father, he would disown me for my feelings. You are his successor. I should not be muddling your thoughts with my own selfishness. i-” 

Draal suddenly stopped talking as Jim kissed him  
“love you too big guy. I’ve always liked you, well I mean, as a friend. Then more than that, not like...dating but...i don’t know how to explain it. I just really always loved being around you. I thought it was weird you started to try and get away from me more often, I thought I was being clingy so I didn’t push myself onto you. Then well...i...just grew a lot of love for you. I always feel great when I’m around you, when we spend time together, everything! I loved when you pet me and talked to me and just...interacted with me. I thought I was the one using you. That my nature was making you uncomfortable. I felt bad about ruining what we had. I didn’t want things to get weird so I never brought anything up.

Now, when I smelled..well...you having fun with yourself last night….it sent me into my heat, I mean, it was already on its way, I no doubt you could smell it, then that pushed me into it. Then, well, I always occasionally thought of you, being with me. It wasn’t just that you were all buff and handsome, well that ALSO was a thing, but it was deeper than that. I always could trust you, count on you, you would always be there for me. So, that made me always want you….then….yesterday….i felt terrible, I felt like I as using you! That I was pushing you into doing something you didn’t want to do. Then today I was hoping that we could just...try and forget it. That we wouldn’t be weird around each other. That everything would go just as great as it always did. Now, well, now things are totally different! Now we can...well….date...if you want to.”

“i...i had always hoped to become your mate. I had no idea you felt this way towards me”  
“same here” Jim put a hand on Draal’s shoulder. Draal looked at the hybrid with relaxed happiness.  
“This isn’t a dream right?”  
“nah, if it is, it’s the best one I’ve ever had.”  
“so...the two of us….”  
“wana go out?”  
“why would we go out?”  
“no I mean, it’s a human thing. Draal. Will you be my mate?”  
“i accept it with every ounce of my being” Jim smiled and kissed him again.  
“So, this...kissing...”  
“it means a lot of affection for someone. I really love you Draal”  
“then..i believe I am enjoying this...kissing”  
“good, I’m going to be doing that a lot”  
“i enjoy the affection”

Jim kissed Draal again, after he pulled off he started to trace Draal’s chest engravings.  
“sooo...wana go back to my nest? Make this more...official” Draal groaned  
“i...i would rather not...you….you make me very aroused...however….i...still have yet to have proper feeling….”  
“aww, I didn’t hump you that hard did I?”  
“my loins are raw and unfeeling. I had to pour large sums of ice within my Kilt to soothe my ache.”

“huh, so that’s what you did, I thought you just ate all of it. Alright, well how about this, you wana watch me get myself off?”  
“get off of what?”  
“masturbate. I masturbate while you watch”  
“i would enjoy this sight very much”

Jim winked and went upstairs with Draal in tow. 

………………………………………..

That night at the dinner table, Jim had made a very big very special feast. Before anyone ate, Jim and Draal announced their new courtship. Walt choked and Barbara helped him  
“uh...sweetie you and Draal are...together now?”  
“yeah mom..that’s...cool right?”  
“that’s wonderful! I truly hope you will both make one another very happy!” Draal and Jim smiled at one another. Walt cleared his throat felt better.  
“you and him hm? Well I must say I have seen….stranger things. Are you...sure?”  
“yeah, I am” Draal looked at him with a lot of anger and snorted  
“My intentions are pure and true.”  
“oh I don’t doubt that, I’m just afraid Jim doesn’t fully understand what he’s getting into.”  
“w-wait what does that mean? What does he mean Draal?” Jim suddenly looked nervous. There still was A LOT of Troll ‘customs’ he had no idea about. Trolls could be even more complex than humans could be at times.

Walt explained  
“Well...there’s the courtship event..if...this is official. Is it?”  
“yes” Draal pounded his chest with joy  
“yea its...official….”  
“well..i..hope everything goes well...” Barbara looked at her husband  
“Walt what does that mean?” Draal chuckled and felt strong and prideful  
“my courtship will be announced tomorrow in trollmarket. All will know and all will fight.”

Jim opened his eyes wide and moved his hands  
“wait wait wait. What fight? What event?!” Walt set down his fork  
“Draal, perhaps it is best not to involve Jim with courting. He has no idea what he’s getting himself into.” Barbara looked nervous and worried  
“what’s this all about exactly? Why should my son be worried and not involved?”

“Draal here is doing something his kind does when courtship occurs. His tribe takes courtship a bit….more serious than others.” Draal flexed his arms and said happily  
“We fight and kill to prove our worth! Tomorrow it will be announced of our courtship! As tradition states, all may challenge me for my title as your new mate.” Jim and Barbara were now speechless.  
“Yes...well, with Draal now going to be in our lives in a more permanent way, I think I should start to explain his now...upcoming behaviors.”

“my tribes law and traditions are honorable and just!”  
“barbaric is more like it.”  
“do you wish to fight me impure?!”  
“no not at all.”

“OKAY okay hold on let’s back up. what’s this fight exactly?! For what title?!” Draal smiled as big as he could at Jim. He beamed joy  
“Tradition states that when we announce our courtship, any alpha is allowed to challenge me to my new title. We fight, and the victor receives the title, now and forever.”

“wait….now and forever?” Walt spoke up  
“yes. Jim, trolls mate forever. One mate, all their lives. The moment that two trolls agree to court one another, its the same as proposing for marriage. There is no ‘dating’ with trolls.”  
“so trolls just rush into things?!”  
“is it really that different from everything else?”  
“okay that’s a fair point. So now, until I or Draal dies...we’re married?” Draal laughed heartily  
“YES! The honor of being your mate is mine!”

“okay so. What if you loose?”  
“i never loose. If for some reason I do, then whoever beats me gets to be your mate”  
“and what if I don’t want them?”  
“well...you MUST be with them. that’s troll law’s and tradition’s to my tribe.”  
“wait so I LITERALLY might end up with some random troll I don’t even know!?”  
“Yes! Exciting isn’t it?! Do not fear my….mate….ohh I love saying that! I will win and be yours forever!.”

 

Barbara took off her glasses slowly and rubbed her temples.  
“within 5 minutes this dinner goes from a good meal to suddenly Jim getting married and Draal fighting everyone.” Walt smirks  
“that sums it up.” Draal puts a hand on Jim’s shoulder  
“i cannot wait to win and then impregnate you”

“whoaaaa slow down big guy! isn’t it a liiiiiittle early to start having kids?” Walt cleared his throat  
“like courtship, trolls at large, have children when they first become mates. With humans, you wait and date and see if it works out and then decide what you want to do. Well, that’s the ideal thing. With trolls, its the opposite. You court, you have children, you move into a home that alpha creates, or lives at already, and then you go about your lives happily ever after. There is no waiting young atlas. Which is why I fear for your sake. You are hardly in your twenties and know nothing about troll courtship. I don’t want you to agree to something you might regret down the line.”

Draal growls at Walt

“BUSHIGAL! I will NEVER be a regretful choice! I shall only love and respect and care for him in the greatest of ways!”

“Draal. I….” Draal looks at Jim now, his eyes look at Jim’s worried expression.  
“Jim, please...i...i can prove myself...i promise! We have feelings for one another...please let me prove myself”  
“...okay….I guess I’ll get troll married. Well, people marry when they’re young and have kids anyways. I have a great job technically, lots of friends, plenty of good housing choices, a supporting family and a soon to be awesome husband who knows me in and out. Sure, why not!” Draal grabs Jim and hugs him tightly.

“i will not fail you or be disappointing in any way. I promise on my fathers name”  
“great...now I just realized I have to talk to your dad….” Walt smirked at that idea  
“let’s cross that bridge when we get to it, shall we?”

“Well, I made dessert. Why don’t I get that out and we can finish dinner.” Draal laughs and agrees  
“YES! Then I shall breed you well in our nest” Barbara almost dropped her fork  
“excuse me?”  
“my mate is still in heat, we shall sleep in the same nest, and I shall breed him thoroughly. Do not fear, I will never disappoint him sexually. You have my word.”  
“Sweetie..that….that’s not appropriate dinner conversation.”  
“how so? Is it not a beautiful thing? Our lovemaking”  
“okay, no more. let’s eat dinner, no more talk about anything related to that. And enjoy the rest of the night.”

Draal cheered to her and the night……

………………………..

Jim woke up, he felt amazing! He yawned and stretched, he noticed his nest was a LOT bigger. It was almost twice its size. He felt around and looked, trying to figure out the answer to this sudden situation. Jim noticed a note on his desk. He got up and took a look, it was written in trollish.

“My mate. My love for you is as undying as my passion for battle. I have already set up the challenge and once you finish reading this, come to trollmarket to witness my glory! Speak to Vendel for any additional details. I shall see you again soon my love. One last thing to note, I have acquired more nesting materials. Use them as you want, I will let you build our nest. I want you to create something that you will be comfortable in. do not worry for my sake, I shall enjoy whatever you create.

“oh no...” Jim said, he quickly got ready and rushed out to trollmarket, saying a quick goodye to his mother and Walt. Walt told him that he had the answers to any troll related questions. He would be happy to answer any question at any time. Something Jim knew he would need.

Jim entered trollmarket and rushed over to the Hero’s forge. He saw just how packed full it was with the troll inhabitants. The crowd cheered out. Jim had made his way up to the stands, next to Vendel. Vendel saw Jim and told the other trolls to leave their own ‘private box’.

“Ahh trollhunter. I have not seen this much excitement for this type of event since Kanjigar himself had a courting event.”  
“Does this thing happen often? And why is so many trolls...interested?”  
“Well, to start with, Draals tribe’s events are very exciting to watch. Second It is a claim for none other than the trollhunter’s courtship, not your everyday troll. Third he IS the son of Kanjigar, they expect great things from him, fourth the alpha male is the one to always fight and hold the title for the event. And lastly now that you have spoken forth about wanting your own alpha, every alpha that wishes to be your mate has come forth to fight and earn it. I’m surprised so many warriors have come, from practically every tribe.”

“so...okay quick question, if someone else wins besides Draal...I’m with them forever?”  
“yes”  
“so...what if I don’t want that?”  
“ppft. You humans are such fickle creatures. You can never focus your minds on a single thing for more than a moment. Yes, you will stay with them forever, whether you wish that or not. Do not be fearful, alphas are always very kind and caring to their omegas. So no matter who wins, they will provide for you and give you the best possible life they can offer.”

“that’s….not very settling...didn’t think I would bring home some other troll other than Draal today”  
“Draal is the son of Kanjigar, and very strong and impressive in his own right. Do not fear, whoever manages to best him will be a better alpha. You should be very thankful, so many want to provide for you. There are even some Kubera out there.”

“wait the super deep in the earth trolls? Like arrrg?”  
“yes, word spread as quickly as a gnome infestation all over the world.”  
“hardly any of them know me though!”  
“they will get to know you, as is troll custom.”  
“so I’m not allowed to just pick who I want?”  
“If it were any other tribe, yes. However Draal’s tribe is a fighting one.”  
“so let’s say I picked a kubera, they don’t fight?”  
“no, actually they are similar to penguins. Their courtships involve bringing their potential mates stones and gems, whatever Is pleasing to the eye. If one of them wins, I’ve no doubt they would always be giving you gifts of such.”

“okay, that’s...sweet...so...i just...I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around all this” Vendel groans and sighs  
“there is nothing hard to this at all. Let me make it nice and simple. Draal fights and wins, he’s yours. Or it would be your his. If another wins, they get you”

“great, so I might get some random husband.”  
“Exactly, exciting isn’t it?...oh do not pout trollhunter. So many desire your affection. This is the first courting event in centuries. This is your special day, relax and enjoy the show. Your mate will be claimed at the end of this event. Enjoy yourself while it lasts. You won’t ever have another one again.”

“wait but what if they die? Like lets say Draal and I are mates then eventually he kicks the bucket for whatever reason. What then?”  
“then Draal is gone.”  
“i meant like….trolls mate for life, were does that leave me?”  
“mate-less, that’s where it leaves you”  
“So could I just get a new one?”  
“hmpf. Ungrateful thoughts. Get a new one? This isn’t a sword or a mug of glug. You cannot simply ‘get a new one’.”

“Great….”  
“i personally approve of Draal beign your mate. He is very strong and virile, he will have a good whelp with you, he is able to grant you a wonderful life.”

Suddenly the crowd roared out and Vendel announced that the event will begin!  
“oh no...”

……………………………………  
TO BE CONTINUED!


	3. the wedding of the century! (literally)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, things go to all out chaos. why not join in on the fun? who want's to get punched by Draal? raise your hand!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> maaan sorry this took so long! stuff happened and anyways i am NOT abandoning this! i have sooo many good ideas! get ready for more fun!

To say that the event was nothing but ‘eventful’ would be a lie. It was pretty extreme. Even for troll standards. 

The honor of being the trollhunters mate, something so many desired. When someone announces they wish to begin a courtship, it’s the only time anyone is allowed to truly court in Draal’s tribe. When the event happens, the title of being the partners mate is up for grabs. Everyone is allowed to partake in it. The victor naturally is the one who has proven themselves the strongest and hardiest, thus claims the title, even if they were not the ones to propose it. (btw, I don’t know if he has one or whatever, point is I’m going to make it up in this) at the end of the event, when the title is claimed, the two partners now mark themselves to signify their eternal courtship. Their bodies are carved into with matching designs, forever completing the bond between one another. 

Now, Jim watched with intense nervousness, he believed in Draal’s abilities, he had no doubts as to just how tough he was. However, the fear of becoming partners with some random troll from who knows where was very real. The crowd cheered as Draal walked around, flexing his muscles and showing off just how strong he was. Then, it began.

To beat Draal wasn’t the only thing. You had to be the ONLY one to win. No, you could not just hide and wait, you had to earn it. The first killings were brutal and bloody, Jim always knew trolls got tough and defensive when it came to their mates, this, this was one of the most extreme moments Jim’s ever actually witnessed. Draal was very impressive, almost everyone came at him at once. He ducked and rolled and moved and swung and bashed and broke bones and well, everything Draal does the best, being a violent relentless warrior. Now, even more berserk due to his soon to be mates title on the line. The whole time, he was laughing and shouting out how weak the others were compared to him.

Bodies littered the floor of the arena. So much broken stone now, it seemed like a graveyard of old statues from a distant era. Sometimes it WAS funny to see a troll trip over some remains and fall face first onto the ground. Jim couldn’t take his eyes away from the fight, he didn’t want to watch the carnage, but he was too stressed if he looked away, dammed if you do dammed if you don’t. Draal bled, he was wounded, cut, beaten, bruised. He just laughed it off though, shrugging the pain off like someone would water on a rainy day. Draal would occasionally look at Jim up in the stands, he would wink or make a bite motion, causing Jim to become flustered….and even a bit aroused. 

Jim didn’t understand why he felt so...turned on, not by the violence, but just watching his mate be so...strong. Sure, human omegas felt the same way, but Jim’s troll side was coming out heavily. He was almost impatient to the idea of just running over and getting it on with Draal after all this. Jim shook his head clear and tried to focus. Occasionally Vendel would speak to Jim about something, even though he wasn’t paying attention most of the time. Jim would just nod his head or agree under his breath.

Draal was clearly going to get scars, something that Draal would love of course. He always talked about them if they were brought up. He would go on and on about how he ‘earned them’ in battle. Talking about what or who he fought, how he did it, where he did it, with what weapon, etc.

it was finally down to the last two. Jim was so thankful Draal was one of them. The other, a huge Kubera, larger than Arrrg was, if only by a bit, But still. It was clear Draal was tired, his body was starting to falter, weakening. The Kubera’s was also, however he still had a lot of energy, that was clear. Draal had more pain tolerance, the Kubera had more strength in those final moments.

Jim could hardly hear anything as the crowd cheered and roared all at the same time, almost making the ground shake from their booming voices. Jim’s ears started to ring from the sheer volume and power. Draal took a split second to wink at Jim once more, a big mistake however. The Kubera took that opportunity to charge and slam Draal across the arena, causing Draal to fly backwards and land on a pile of stone, aka dead opponents. He was a bit dazed, his expression was clear. The Kubera was cocky and walked over with a smug attitude. He actually turned towards Jim and licked his lips. Jim was turned on, his body betraying him for the sheer power that lurked within the Kubera. 

Draal finally snapped out of his daze, he tried to get up, only to trip and fall onto his butt from a head. The crowd laughed as did his opponent. Draal layed there and closed his eyes. Looking like he’s finally finished, he was over with. Jim yelled for Draal to get back up, to the point where hot tears started to stream down his face. As the Kubera picked up a large spear, twirled it masterfully, and strode over to strike the finishing blow, Draal had quickly gotten up and sucker punched the Kubera.

The Kubera stumbled over one of the many pieces of rocks, a large one in fact. Large enough to cause him to topple backwards and fall to his side. He quickly turned, only to see Draal above him.  
“never. Motion to my mate. That. Licking gesture. Let it. Be the last. Thing you. Learn.” Draal panted heavily as he spoke. The Kubera looked in fear at Draal, who looked back with anger/passion/violence/and joy. All mixing together within a short time.

“Say your last prayers with your final breaths. You were an honorable warrior. You have earned this death, may others remember you as a powerful warrior. I am thankful I got to fight such an opponent. I shall remember this day, along with my body, for the rest of my life.” The Kubera looked everywhere quickly, hoping to see something, ANYTHING, to help him. It was to late. He whispered out something then went limp. Then slowly turned to stone.

Draal took a deep breath. 

He has proven himself.

He has earned his title.

He has earned his love.

He has his future.

“father. I hope you are proud of me. I shall name my whelp in your name.”

Draal spoke softly, his breathing still ragged and rough.

 

The crowd was silent, watching the final blow. The only sounds were Draal and the Kubera’s weapons clanging to the floor, Draals heavy breathing, the crumbling noise of rock breaking and falling. Draal looked up at the silent stands, then to Jim. He raised his arms and did a war roar in victory. Suddenly the crowds roared up in response. Everyone applauded and chanted and cheered and stomped their feet. This mighty fight was finished. Draal had won. Those who gambled now took their winnings. Draal was now happy, this was one of the wonderful days of his life. He will never forget it. He will tell stories of this day to all who would listen, until his dying breath.

 

Vendel cheered then turned to Jim.  
“well, looks like someones finally gotten himself a proper mate. Congratulations trollhunter, I hope you both will be very happy. Now, come, time for the next phase” Vendel put an arm around Jim and led him down to the arena  
“the next phase? isn’t this it?”  
“no no. this was just the test. The most important part actually, but there are still three things we must do”  
“that would be?”  
“now now, I don’t want to spoil any surprises for you.” Vendel chuckled and winked. 

The two walked down to the opening of the forge. Vendel then announced  
“listen well, all of trollmarket, and more, have witnessed firsthand today's event. Draal the deadly, son of Kanjigar the courageous, has proven himself worthy of becoming mates with our trollhunter. James lake Jr. son of ba bruh ah, predecessor of Kanjigar the courageous...come to think of it, that will make an interesting exchange….now, who here disagrees with this courtship?”

no one made any noise  
“and who wishes it”  
everyone cheered  
“then now, it is time for the mates to court….okay Jim, that was the second. now, walk over to Draal” Vendel said kindly while patting his shoulder. Jim was for some reason nervous. He swallowed down a his dry throat. He looked from the stands to Draal. Everyone was quiet and eager for the next part. Something Jim still had no clue about. Draal had the biggest smile on his face. His body was still worn down and wounded from battle, but his heart beat like it was in prime condition. The second Jim got close, Draal kicked aside some piles of rubble. Then got down on one knee and stretched out an arm, while his other hand covered his heart.

“Jim. My heart yearns for you. My body bleed for you. My mind thinks of you. My soul hungers for you. I have proven my worth to you in many ways, my ancestors smile on me today and bless me with a good future with you. I swear everything to you and will die for you, I will kill for you, I am yours to command. I pledge myself to you and only to you. My greatest victory shall be to claim the title of your mate. Are you willing to allow me to claim said title? To become your mate? For our souls to intertwine now and for all of time? I am ready for your choice.” 

Jim blinked, suddenly it seemed like the only noise was from Draal and Jims breathing. Jim looked back to Vendel  
“say yes if you want this”

Jim looked back to Draal  
“so...this is forever?”  
“yes my love”  
“okay...uh….yes?”  
“is….is that true? That sounded more along the lines of a question”

“sorry it’s just me, I’m kinda nervous. I mean I do really like you and you did literally kill like, 50 people for me”  
“77”  
“right….to humans, this is a big deal..i mean this IS a big deal to all of you of course! I just...nerves uh...okay...yes. Yes I agree to be with you now and forever...uh...wait...was...i suppose to write my own vows? Cause humans exchange them at a wedding”

Vendel whisper shouted  
“enough talk. Now give a simple head touch. Place your forehead on his. Tap horns, and everything will be complete for the courtship ritual.” Jim nodded and walked forward, he was now directly in front of Draal. Draal bowed his head and showed his forehead clearly. Jim leaned down and tapped his horns against his new mates. The clunk echoed throughout the forge, surprisingly loudly. Jim suddenly felt a sense of warmth rush over him, he purred and felt so eased. Draal moved his head until they were both eye level  
“thank you. you’ve made me far more happy than I could ever be. The only thing that could top this day, is when our whelp is born.”

“yeah..uh...about that...you know what, we’ll talk later about it. it’s not important right now” Jim smiled along with Draals own.  
“if you’d like, we may kiss. I know how much it means to humans, the sign of affection.”  
“sure!” Jim closed his eyes, leaned in, and kissed his mate. After he pulled off he opened his eyes and looked at a smirking Draal.  
“Why do humans close their eyes? Is it supposed to be a surprise if the others choice of action?”  
“no it’s just...a thing? Like….i dunno...anyways...uh...i love you and we’re mates now...uh...now what?...Vendel said we had to do other stuff”

Draal nodded and got up off the ground. He raised his arms and the crowd cheered  
“WE ARE OFFICIALLY MATES! ALL BEAR WITNESS, ALL HEAR AND SEE! LET THE VERY LIVES BOTH PAST PRESENT AND FUTURE ACKNOWLEDGE OUR COURTSHIP!”  
the crowd was a lively as ever. Jim was a bit awestruck by how intense the crowd was. This was...Jim’s wedding...this was official...Jim never put much thought into his wedding day, he assumed it would be all white and fairy tale, like how most people do it. To actually have something as...exciting as this though, it was...well...aw inspiring. All these trolls knew both Draal and Jim well enough, they had done many things for years in trollmarket. Now, here they all were, supporting their marriage, their love.

Jim’s mouth opened a bit...all this joy and celebration, all for him and Draal. He felt so full, satisfied, warmed up. The amulet in his pocket glowed and hummed faintly. He pulled it out to see it tick a bit faster. Jim wondered if even the trollhutners from the past cheered for him. Jim took a deep breath, and closed his eyes, memorizing these moments. This really was his wedding. He had to keep reminding himself that. It just felt...un-real. In a way, he enjoyed it. Besides the fighting, but just the overall concept of Draal literally risking his life for Jim’s love. How the crowed just agreed happily for them. How much this meant to so many.

Jim almost jumped out of his skin when he suddenly felt Vendel’s hand on his shoulder.  
“you did good...a little too much rambling, but good.” Draal was also patted on the shoulder  
“you do your tribe proud, your father, your honor, and all of trollmarket.”  
“thank you Vendel for your kind words. I swear on my life I will do whatever it takes to keep Jim safe and loved”  
“i know, you literally just went over your vows. Now, you both go on to the next stage, while I have the post fight mess cleaned up.” Draal nodded before turning to Jim, patting him on the back, and started to walk. Jim paused quickly and turned around, asking Vendel

“oh uh hey real quick though...all those trolls….what’s going to happen to them?”  
“they will have their funerals”  
“but..who were they? I mean, there were a lot and I didn’t know any of them”  
“they were competitors for your-”  
“i know that, I just….i feel...weird, just having a bunch of trolls die for me, someone they don’t even personally know”  
“do not interrupt. Yes, I can see from your point of view on how confusing this must all be. They knew what they had agreed to. So do not worry about them, this is your day, now go enjoy it”

Draal pushed Jim forward  
“come my mate. We have two more steps to do”  
“which are?”  
“one painful, one fun”  
“painful and fun, got it”

………………..

Jim had always wondered about tattoos. People got them all the time, so many different designs, colors, patterns, styles. A lot of real creative work went into them. People picked and chose what they wanted. He always heard that they did hurt and took a while. Now, thinking about it, it must have been easier. For Jim, his skin wasn’t totally stone, so it hurt. Sure, it would hurt regardless if he was full troll. However, his skin was much softer and weaker. So it really really really hurt.

The next step? Matching mate tattoos. He was literally having a pattern carved into his body. His torso and around his back and his neck and on his cheeks. The nail literally digging into him, cracking and carving his body so so slowly. He was crying and whimpering. He was trying to hold it together, although the nearby trolls laughed and chuckled in amusement. Sure, they weren’t laughing at him for being weak, but that this was his first time, and that he didn’t know what to expect.

Draal had done this before a couple times, he knew what he was going through. He also realized his mate didn’t. He felt bad, especially because Jim wasn’t fully stone. Human skin was so tender, so sensitive. So having this done to him must have hurt badly. Which was very clear. Draal chuckled seeing his mate react, he also did feel bad about doing that. He did not want to watch his mate be in pain.

“you’re doing wonderful my mate. Your back is almost done. Then to the ribs, then chest, then neck, then face”

“wonderful. I can’t wait for that pain either.”

the one giving the mating carving chuckled  
“good, cause it’s coming.”

………………………………………..

Jim whimpered and felt sore. His body was bleeding slightly from the markings. He looked himself over and enjoyed what he saw. It was a pattern based off of Draals tribe. Since Jim didn’t come from one, he had only Draals done to him. That and some basic ‘strength’ patterns carved into him. Draal suggested getting a ‘fertility’ pattern carved from his belly to his ‘nether regions’. Jim passed. Draal was a bit saddened, but understood. Jim really didn’t feel like getting a pattern of ‘hey! This is my womb! Let me get a kid in it asap!’ on himself. 

Jim finally felt relief when he sat down in the glug hub. Vendel had given him some troll equivalent of pain killers. It was a strange powdery substance that tasted like lemon and vinegar. Nasty, but helpful. Jim had closed his eyes and felt the pain start to subside, then opened them the second he heard the familiar voice of his mentor/father figure.  
“master Jim!” Jim smiled and looked over to a smiling Blinky and Arrrg.  
“hey you guys, ho-OWWOWOWW” Jim was suddenly hugged tightly by Blinky and Arrrg.  
“pain Painful! Very painful!” Arrrg looked a bit worried and let go  
“oops. Sorry.”  
“it’s okay big guy. Still sore all over from my new tats.”  
“looks good! Like Blinky’s.”

Blinky smiled and looked Jim’s over.  
“very nice detail. A very finely made one! We have come to celebrate!”  
“watched you!. Strong!. Make Jim happy” Arrrg hugged Draal who did breathe through his teeth and flinch, his wounds still fresh, but patched up by Vendel.  
“Thank you Arrrg, I knew my victory would be had, however it wasn’t as easy as I had imagined, especially at the end.”

Blinky patted Draals arm  
“you did well! Your father must be proud of his son. Ah true love, I wish we could experience times like this more often.”

Jim looked at Blinky and Arrrg in curiosity  
“wait, you both watched?”  
“why of course! Why wouldn’t we? It was your mate event after all! And it was remarkable! I haven’t seen fighting like that since Kanjigar’s event! Oh good times those were.” Blinky looked happily in nostalgia.  
“Also reminds me of when we wed.” Blinky smiled at Arrrg who in return nuzzled into Blinky  
“happy day. Found perfect stone”  
“I still have it too. I would rather loose a limb that loose our court stone.” Jim smiled at the two so heavily in love, then noticed Draal smiling dreamily at Jim.  
“I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you. I shall impregnate you as soon as we return home!”

“oh uh...okay, yeah about that...i...look I really love you but...i...don’t really want a kid right now” Draal’s smile fadded and worry came in to replace it  
“do you not find me a good enough lover?”  
“no! No no you’re amazing! I just...Look, I’m not the type to want to have a kid yet. I just, could we wait please? Trust me I DO and WILL have a kid with you. I promise. Just...not now”  
“then when?”  
“i honestly don’t know. we’ll cross that bridge when we come to that. that’s okay right? I don’t want you to think it’s your fault or anything. I’m just not ready.”

Draal closed his eyes, took a deep breath, then opened them and smiled  
“if that is your choice and what you truly desire, then so it shall be! I shall wait as long as you need! You did promise me a son, so, a son I shall have, just not now. Something I get to look forward to!”  
“Thanks Draal for understanding. Speaking of kids….hey Blinky, how come you and Arrrg haven’t had one yet? you’ve been together for a really long time right?”

Arrrg and Blinky looked to one another somberly  
“I’m afraid I cannot conceive one.”  
“oh...like...barren?”  
“yes. I suppose fate has dealt us a hand that we cannot change.”  
“want a whelp...can’t have one...” Jim frowned and understood now.

“well, maybe you both could adopt?”  
“I’m afraid not. Trolls do not simply ‘adopt’ whelps. Besides, there are hardly any in the first place.”  
“why’s that?”  
“take a look around, have you seen a whelp here?”  
“huh..i...honestly never thought about it...yeah I really haven’t seen a kid”  
“that is because trolls have one child. Due to our lengthy lifespans compared to humans, we rarely spawn any. Perhaps one day fate might smile on us and bless us with our own. Until then, we shall not let that keep our love saddened! Now, enough of this unhappy talk. It is time to celebrate!” Blinky clasped his hands together and brought back his cheerful mood.

“So the next part of our courting event and all that, is a party? Well that makes sense.” Draal laughed loudly  
“Yes! Not just any party. A true mating party! We celebrate for a month! Drinking and dancing and playing games and fighting!”  
“wait...i don’t loose you if you fight again right?! Cause I’m preeeetttyyy sure these tats won’t come off”  
“no no my mate. This is for fun! We have already proven myself, never again will I have to fight for it. I hope that news helps to ease your mind.”  
“that actually does, thanks. Wait…. A MONTH?!?’  
“YES! And a month in pure happiness! Now, let us start!”

 

Everyone cheered and started to dance and play music and have bar fights, lots of trolls started to get drunk after an hour or two. Jim made sure to only get a small buzz going. He didn’t want to accidentally start to cry or something embarrassing in front of everyone. Jim laughed at troll jokes and from Draal being his usual big rowdy self. Throwing trolls into each other, drunkenly punching and headbutting others, ESPECIALLY Arrrg. Those two wouldn’t stop drinking, laughing, and fighting joyfully.

Jim loved the party but decided to call it quits. Blinky helped him get home before going back to hopefully try and calm Arrrg down, knowing full well how much he could get out of hand.

Jim walked through his house, tired, giddy and buzzed. His head was starting to hurt and he just wanted to go to bed. He didn’t even attempt to find out what time it was, all he knew was that it was very late. He plopped down into his nest and fell asleep instantly…

……………………………….

The next morning. Jim woke up with his usual yawn and stretch. He looked around and wondered why he felt so sore all over, then remembered yesterdays event. All of it flashed through his mind in mere moments. He did wonder why he woke up alone. He just wrote it off, thinking Draal had already got up. Jim staggered downstairs, going into his kitchen, raiding the fridge for ice cold water, chugging a whole bottle in three swallows. He closed the fridge and turned around. He gasped and jumped as he saw Noten sitting on his counter with an angry look on his face. He then suddenly threw an apple at Jim.  
“ah, what the hell?”  
“what the hell? What the hell with you!”  
“what?”  
“you know dam what!”  
“i honestly don’t know what’s going on here, but I need a shower, breakfast, and to try and find my phone.”  
“you know daaam well what’s going on! And Blinky has it. By the way, its 1pm. Enough about you, let’s talk about YOU and what you did last night. you’re in deeep shit.”  
“wait what why? 1PM? Why does Blinky have my phone, and why are you in here?”

“bup bup bup. YOU answer MY questions FIRST.”  
“i-”  
“i I I I. I don’t care. Explain to me why this morning, I woke up, played with the baby, was eatin my morning socks, then find out that YOU GOT MARRIED!. You know what, congrats, I’m not mad about that. I’m not mad that I didn’t see the awesome fight. I’m not mad that you got your mate tattoos, a major event that I wanted to watch. Hell, I’m not even mad that you didn’t tell anyone you ran off and got hitched in a day. What I AM MAD ABOUT. Is that you THREW A PARTY AND DIDN’T INVITE ME!. Oh noooo, you couldn’t send the tiiiiinnneeeest little text, “hey I’m married come party”. But noooo, you were to busy havin fun without me. Oh, and not JUST some plain old rager, I’m talking about a MATE EVENT PARTY. THOSE THINGS ONLY HAPPEN ONCE IN FUCKIN FOREVER!” Noten threw another apple, then a pear, then an orange at Jim. All hitting his face. Jim put his hands up to try and cover himself.

“hey! It’s not like I planned this! I went into heat, boned Draal, the next night he and I got together, then suddenly he proposed, I woke up the next day to find out, hey, HE’S LITERALLY FIGHTING TO THE DEATH FOR ME. Then he won, then all that party stuff happened! It’s not like I had any time to think! It all happened so quickly! Then I come home, pass out, and wake up to you yelling and throwing fruit at me! AND HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE?!”

“I can pick a lock. By the way for some reason your door’s window is busted, I don’t know how that happened. Anyways you owe me. Big time Mr omega hybrid trollhunta.”

“i owe you?! You broke into my home and assaulted me with fruits! AND BROKE THE DOOR’S WINDOW!”

“i told you, I don’t know how that happened! The fruits deserved it! They were goin rotten, and also you deserved it!. You should be thankful these parties last a whole fuckin month. And by the way, you’re going to let me throw you a bachelor party. Yeah, I said it. Like it or not, but I’m doin it. Trolls don’t do that kinda stuff, so I got you. Now, then. Happy marriage! Tell me about all the sweet carnage! Oh man! I could have made a ‘killing’ on the bets!” Noten rubbed his hands together.

Jim rubbed his face.

Suddenly he felt like his personal life was about to become a lot more busy.

Spoiler, it does.


	4. the parties over Draal! sorry Jim, another one for you though

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draal is out of control and headlocks Arrrg. thankfully our trollhunter has come to save the day!. then has a bachelor party. what could possibly even go wrong with something Noten plans?......
> 
> how could i even forget to mention: THE PUSSY CRUSHER!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> really fun chapter to write! even got a couple friends to laugh at it. enjoy! i hope Jim did...
> 
> ALSO i have a little something special coming soon! keep your eyes open and your feels ready! =D

Jim laid on the couch, something he hardly fit in now, cause, hybrid body. He stared up at the ceiling, watching the fan slowly rotate. He was deep in his thoughts. It was around 3pm now, Noten had ran off snickering about getting Jim a stripper for his party. Also making jokes about it ‘being a bachelor or bachelorette party’, after all he was partly human, trolls didn’t do those things, and he was an omega. Then he took a shower and ate something and got on some fresh clean cloths that didn’t stink like blood mixed with whatever nasty cocktail makings glug was made out of. (he did drink it, not much, he COULD stomach it now...but only a mug or two. It also did give him a bit of a buzz, seeing how glug was troll beer) 

(I think that’s actually cannon. They imply it at one point in the secrets of trollhistory book) 

Jim didn’t care, his thoughts were on the subject of ‘oh shit. I really did rush into things huh?’. Jim wasn’t upset or mad at how things turned out. He was more….confused? Anxious?. His stomach was upset and he wasn’t sure what his next plan was, other than to think of how he could somehow get out of the party.

Party. Another one. Not like he didn’t just do it the previous night, or find out trolls do it for AN ENTIRE MONTH. Jim closed his eyes, rubbed his face, then just laid there, feeling the fans cooling light air blow down to him.

“-Well thank you for checking there, I’ll call you as so-oh thank goodness, Walt he’s right here. Yeah, you can head home now. Love you too, bye” Barbara had walked into their home, first trying to figure out why there was glass on the floor, then why her door’s window was broken, then noticing her son on the couch.  
“Jim! You gave me such a scare! Same with Walt!” she quickly walked over and cradled her son’s head. Petting him and making him purr in delight.  
“where were you?! You totally vanished yesterday after running out of the house saying goodbye before Walt or I could actually talk to you. Then I couldn’t find any clues to where you went, you weren’t answering you phone, then I wake up and still haven’t heard or seen you, now I come home to a broken...door….how’d that happen? Anyways sweetie pleasssseee don’t just run off without telling someone where you’re going to. I don’t like when you just vanish and then come back out of nowhere. I know how big and strong you are but still, I worry!” Jim did ‘vanish’ often, only when he was in heat though. He felt so...cramped sometimes. He felt Claustrophobic, so he would run off into the woods to breathe. Sometimes being gone for a few days until he felt more calmed down. He felt too much anxiety being at home, and too much anxiety not being near his nest. He couldn’t win. He never told anyone, his brain just didn’t want to. Like he wanted no one to be able to find him, so he could have peace and quiet, away from everyone and everything. He would come home after he felt better and apologized, explaining his mood swings and how terrible he felt for just...abandoning everyone.

His friends and family understood, they just want him to mention something like  
‘hey, going to the woods to find myself! Be back whenever! don’t find me please! I’ll call you, don’t call me!’. Jim understood and tried to do that as often as he could, but his anxious nature got the better of him. So when Jim did enter his heat they somewhat expected this. Just one more thing to add to his ‘heat list’. Something everyone joked about. It was a list of the things Jim was likely to do during that time.

“I’m sorry mom, yesterday was….well more than crazy….” Jim explained to his mother everything, moving to let her sit down on the couch then laying his head on her lap, having her still pet him. It did always soothe him and make him feel like everything bad and stressful in the world vanished.  
“then I fell asleep, deeply I guess cause I didn’t hear ANYTHING until I woke up. I don’t know where Draal is since he never came home, apparently he was somewhere in trollmarket doing who knows what. I just...am I rushing things? What if I just did something I will regret later! What if Draal and I don’t make a good couple! What if this and that and i-” Jim started to whimper.  
“shhh, it’s okay sweetie. Breathe. you’re emotions are just a bit more intense since you’re in heat. Also everyone has those questions before they’re about to get married. I did, trust me. Sure, your biological father and I didn’t last...but that’s not what matters. What matters is the person you’re with. I had similar thoughts when Walt proposed to me, but I knew we were right for each other, so I didn’t worry all that much.

Although that does sound very intense...especially watching Draal kill all those trolls...I’m glad I wasn’t there, I would have had a heart attack. You and Draal have always gotten along so good through all these years. Would have been nice if you told me he was living in our basement for that long before I met him, but still. He really is a good supportive person, troll, whatever. He’s always helped to take good care of us and been so helpful around the house and so kind, maybe not so much to Walt, but still. You’re married now and that’s amazing! Draal has so much love to give and is so willing to give it. Personally I feel like he’s a great guy to marry. Plus I know him well enough, so no need for awkward dinner conversations”

“you mean more awkward than usual?” the two laughed at that.  
“i guess so. Well, I guess you can’t get cold feet now. Speaking of, can I see your body markings? I want to make sure they don’t get infected, I’m sure trolls don’t exactly use disinfectant.” Jim took off his shirt and showed his mother. His body was still sore and slightly red from it.  
“ahh!”  
“Sorry, didn’t mean to touch to hard there. Well, it would be safer to get some on here, better safe than sorry”  
“oh good, more pain”  
“that’s life kiddo” 

Jim breathed through his teeth and took deep breaths. It stung badly, but he’s had worse done to him, his pain tolerance was getting good now thankfully.  
“there, all cleaned up. Hmm, looks like Draal’s for sure. So, speaking of, no word on him huh?”  
“none. Last I saw of him he was trying to chug a mug of glug while punching Arrrg in the face who was doing the same. Trying to see who could chug the mug of glug fastest while hitting each other and trying not to spill a drop.”

“chug a mug of glug huh?”  
“yep, chug a mug of glug”  
“well, I hope Vendel can deal with him. The old man needs a break from Draal. No wonder he was so eager to have Draal move here for good.”  
“can you blame him? They have been around each other for a really really long time mom.”

the two laughed at that.  
“Why don’t I deal with this mess here, and you go find your new husband, bring him back here and let me make sure he isn’t partially dead.”  
“I’m sure Vendel would like that break, will do mom.” Barbara kissed her son’s forehead.

……………………………………

Jim walked the streets of trollmarket, getting a good stream of ‘congrats on your marriage! Now you can really make sure Draal can stay under control’, to which Jim smiled, waved and agreed. Jim first started with his dear old ‘adopted parents’ Arrrg and Blinky. Jim entered the cave of theirs, which connected to the library, and deeper into the home. He passed steps and books and even his wonderful ever so loving ‘uncle dic’.

Dic sat in a chair sipping out of a mug. He was listening to some human drama TV show. He really does enjoy drama and crime investigation shows. Along with TED talks, pod casts, and audio books. He also always loved to passively complain.  
“Hey Dic”  
“oh good, you. Hello trollhunter. Congratulations on your marriage. I didn’t get you anything so don’t ask.”  
“didn’t expect you to. They home?”  
“by they I’m going to assume you’re referring to my brother who oh so lovingly took my sight away, that of which of course I forgive him for, and that hound of his he calls a mate. He always loved having the ‘bigger things’ whenever he could choose them. Yes I believe they should still be. They mentioned something of going somewhere to do something. I didn’t want to pay much attention, my show was getting to a really good part. Humans have always been so theatrical, now I understand why. They know how to put on such wonderful performances” 

“okay, helpful as always, thanks”  
“mhm. Always remember if you need anything at all, ask someone else. Now, let me listen in peace. That hound always lumbers around interrupting the best parts, I swear he does that on purpose just to annoy me. That and constantly ‘romances’ my brother in the library. I swear he intends to ruin them from his ‘rough housing’. Do you realize how long it took me to acquire such volumes?! Bad enough all the pain and time I used, then my brother has the audacity to burn them! t-”

Jim had slowly backed out of the room and left quietly. He then headed over to the big old Heartstone.  
“Vendel, you home?” Jim asked as his voice echoed.  
“if you are tell me” the only reply was silence. Which was odd, considering that there was always SOMEONE in it.  
“say nothing if I’m the greatest trollhunter ever!……...now say nothing if I’m the most amazing trollhunter ever!…...now say nothing if I’m allowed to have sex with Draal in here!” THAT made Jim laugh. He did have some sexy fantasy’s about having sex everywhere he could….it felt so….wrong to do it outside his nest, but sooo nice to think about. Now that he’s with Draal, he could actually live out those fantasy’s. Going to the bone zone in the most sacred of trollkind’s places, the literally life blood of trollmarket, moaning and being bred within the life giving walls, the warm glowing light, it seemed incredibly hot!. 

Jim smirked as he walked through it, imagining just where he would want it, if of course the fantasy came to life. Where, what positions, what he wanted to think about. Dam he was horny. With all the things going on, he almost forgot he was actually in heat.

“no you may not breed within these walls. No matter how intense your heats are.” Jim literally jumped and summoned his sword. He looked behind him at an unimpressed Vendel  
“put that away. Planning on slaying me? My how fun that would be for everyone. The greatest and most amazing trollhunter, killing their leader. Then being bred by his new mate within these sacred walls.” Vendel said sarcastically as he walked past Jim and over to his usual spot.

“y-you hea-rd all that huh?”  
“not like you were quiet about it.”  
“how long have you been here?” Jim asked, putting away his sword and armor.  
“Long enough to have heard you. If you must know, I was out and about surveying the damage done, none other than by your mate who has been on a fighting bender since last night. Only to come home to smell the heat of our trollhunter who then was proposing things out into the open.”  
“yeahhhh….uh...anyways” Jim blushed and cleared his throat.  
“I’m going to assume you came to ask for something, not just wish to visit an old troll in his dying days.”  
“you’re dying?!”  
“of course not. It was a joke. I’m either not good at them still, or you don’t have my kind of humor. Possibly both”

“yeah that’s it. I was wondering if you knew where Draal was, along with Blinky and Arrrg.”  
“I sent the three to the forge, which by the way, has been cleaned up, so no need to worry about having any remains disturb your practicing. Speaking of, I sent the three down there to contain Draal’s new found need to kill. Nothing new about that, however it seemed to have grown intensely since yesterday. Hes still very riled up about winning you. Please go calm him down before anyone else is hurt, or worse killed.”

“Thank’s V”  
“V? now you’re not even going to put the effort into saying my full name? I suppose no one needs to put anymore energy into this old troll, Tired and getting less and less useful every year”  
“haha, funny”  
“oh? Did you think I was joking?”  
“uh…..” Jim just ran out of the room and headed to the forge.  
“hmpf. Well, at least the boy is starting to get it, hehe.”

…………………………………….

Jim turned down the hallway to the forge when he heard intense yelling. Draal’s voice of course. And the sound of lots of breaking and smashing.  
“-MORE I DEMAND MORE!”  
“DRAAL, RETRAIN YOURSELF!” Jim noticed Draal head locking Arrrg before throwing him across the arena.  
“HAHAHAH!”  
“ow.” Arrrg got up and shook himself, a few tuffs of hair falling to the floor. Jim rushed over, careful not to fall off the small bridge  
‘SERIOUSLY?! WHY ISN’T ANYONE WANTING TO BUILD A BIGGER ONE?!’ Jim mentally yelled trying not to look down. No matter how many times he came across, he wasn’t fully used to it yet. 

“DRAAL!” Jim yelled. Draal’s eyes widened along with a huge smile  
“MY MATE!” Draal yelled before rolling up into a ball, rolling a bit too quickly towards his mate before unrolling, grabbing and spinning him around then nuzzling him.  
“i love you too, why are you acting like this?! I just talked to Vendel and he tells me you’ve been fighting everyone and destroying everything!” Jim said trying to wiggle out of the grip of iron, even with his strong he was, he still couldn’t get out of it. Draal just nuzzled him more  
“my mate~. I’m so happy to see you so soon!”  
“what? It’s been like, a whole day almost!”  
“...what?”  
“You never even came home last night! what’s up with you?” Draal stopped nuzzling, before burying his nose into Jim and inhaling Jim’s scent heavily, Then moaning into him.

“Master Jim, thank Deya you’ve come.” Blinky said helping Arrrg fully regain his ability to think. After all, when Arrrg goes too much into ‘fight mode’ he goes wild.  
“Draal. Please put me down and explain everything.” Jim said a bit annoyed that Draal wasn’t answering him.  
“Fine.” Draal sighed and reluctantly put his mate down.  
“So?” Jim crossed his arms and waited for an answer, only to be responded with silence and a goofy dumb look on Draal’s face. Clearly something was a bit….off with him.  
“Master Jim, I believe Draal has been in a bit too...festive mood. He hasn’t rested once since yesterday.”  
“Draal, pleaaaasseee go home, stop drinking, lay down and get some rest. You don’t look fully here.”  
“HOW CAN I REST WHEN THERE IS JUST TOO MUCH TO CELEBRATE!” Draal laughed loudly, almost more like a maniac than his regular laugh.

“Draal. I get you love to fight and party and that you’re super happy we’re married. But please! Calm down. For everyone’s sake!”  
“i cannot rest! I must enjoy my life!”  
“and you will, when you become more clear headed. Now head home so I don’t get upset like everyone else. You don’t want that now, do you?” Draal stopped mid laugh and froze. THAT got him to settle down.  
“i-i just”  
“And I just want you to relax. Go home, take a quick shower, then lay in our nest.”  
“mmmmh OUR nest~…..alright, if it will settle your mind, I shall. My heart has such strong stirrings for you! I cannot resist the urge to spend my unlimited well of energy!”  
“well, stop with the well. Besides, you’re on adreniline. Second that’s over, you’re going to pass out and feel like death”

“I SHALL RISK IT! I MUST FEEL LIFE BEFORE DEATH!”  
“look, I promise after you have a nice LONG rest, we’ll hump. A LOT. Deal?” Draal looked into Jim’s eyes with a relaxed and lustful gaze. He growled a bit in lust before nodding, rolling up into a ball and heading home, leaving the other three by themselves.  
“Thank you master Jim, everyone in trollmarket has been relieved of his….energy.”  
“How long has he been so intense?”  
“after you left, he only drank more, and fought more, until he was challenging everyone to fight. Even with his wounds still not fully healed, he demanded the rush of battle. Eventually many trolls did fight him, if only to try and calm him down. He only became worse and ruined many parts of trollmarket. Thank Deya you’ve convinced him to stop.”

“great, now I bet everyone’s pissed off at us for him doing all that”  
“you? Perhaps not. You had nothing to do with it...although many would consider it your fault for not ‘tending’ to his needs. The soothing touch of an omega would calm even the most vicious of trolls, if only for a short time. You are his mate now, meaning you are partially responsible for his behavior.”  
“wonderful. Just another thing on my list of worries”  
“fear not, I’m sure once hes settled down, he will give aid to those that he has...erm….bothered.”

Jim groaned and walked over to the two trolls he was with. Jim patted Arrrg’s arm, noticing how banged up he was from trying to calm Draal down.  
“thanks big guy for what you did, you helped everyone out”  
“no problem. Happy to help. Glad you came.”  
“oh speaking of which, Blinky do you have my phone?”  
“yes, I left it back at our home for safe keeping.”  
“thanks. I should probably check out the damage done, huh?”  
“it would actually be best if you left. With your current state it would be wise to avoid everyone. Everything is already tensed as it is from the recent ‘activities’. Having an omega in heat wander around would only influence alphas to act on their more aggressive nature. Something we do not need. Let us deal with everything, you go home and tend to Draal. Perhaps a good long mating would do him best. Pleasure him well”

“we don’t really need to talk about that kind of thing” Jim blushed and rubbed his arm  
“why the embarrassment? it’s only natural for an omega to have sexual intercourse with their alpha mate. I pleasure Arrrg often, in a very intimate-”  
“okay okay I get it, no need to talk anymore. I’m leaving, good luck and see you both later I guess.”  
“goodbye master Jim”  
“goodbye master Jim”

…………………………………………

Jim was tired and had a headache. He felt like his energy was sapped away just from that short trip. He figured it was his heat causing it. Jim plugged in his phone and saw a note on the counter saying that his mom and step father left for the day. Jim was actually glad to know that, he did want to have a lot of sex with Draal after all, speaking of….

He checked upstairs in his nest, quietly opening his door, only to notice a Draal in deep sleep laying in their nest. Jim chuckled, happy to have him be peaceful for once today. Although a small side of him was disappointing….all that energy could have gone into really good sex~. Jim just sighed those thoughts out and crept away to his own shower. A nice hot relaxing shower, a nice meal, and cozy fluffed up nest next to his new mate, it made the world a better place to him. As Jim closed his eyes he felt Draal’s strong arms pull him close into his chest. Jim purred and enjoyed the feel of just being cuddled by a big strong alpha. Especially since it was HIS alpha. Jim got more comfortable and drifted off to sleep….then the sudden thought of him getting a ‘bachelor’ party later that night from Noten flashed into his mind. no. he was too tired. He would deal with it when he woke up….and humped Draal.

…………………………….  
Jim was a bit dissapointed when he woke up a couple hours later and Draal was still dead asleep. Well he was thankful he was really sleeping everything off. Jim felt great, he cleaned himself up one last night, overall check to make sure he was nice when he left for whatever Noten had in store. Speaking of such a changeling….

Jim’s phone rang with said Changelings number  
“YOOO READY TO GET YOU SOME FUCKIN FUN UP IN YO FACE!?”  
“don’t need to yell, but sure.”  
“head over to the old abandoned warehouse, get ready for fun.”  
“will do. I guess”  
“you guess?!”  
“not exactly still ‘all for this’ after all.”  
“too fuckin bad. Get yer ass down there asap!”

 

And so Jim did. He waited around, only for someone to blindfold him, of course they told him first. He just shrugged and agreed. Then he was taken in a van to some rented out space. He could easily see through the blindfold but decided to just play along. He entered the building to see it filled with random junk, no one around. Then Jim just sat on a big chair in the middle of the place that said ‘omega goes here. Not human omega, trollhunta. don’t forget.’ some trolls just didn’t understand simple instructions, no wonder Noten had to specify. So Jim waited. And waited. He was getting bored. His phone had no reception so it wasn’t like he could text anyone. Then finally some others arrived, all his friends actually. Minus Steve. They all hugged and said hello to one another. They just talked about how each was ‘blindfolded’. Poorly. But still, it was going to be fun! They were each told at least….

After a few minutes the lights suddenly turned off. Then flashing strobe lights, fog machine, and the sound of a small car being driven around. It was Noten’s aright.

He had his own ‘specially customized’ child’s car he rode around in. he called it the ‘pussy crusher’. Nice huh?. It was hot pink with yellow flowers on it, the only ‘customized’ part were speakers installed, (somehow), with an overly large boombox strapped to the back, and some ‘gold’ rims he had on the car. As well as one of those fuzzy little dice hanging from the top of his car’s boombox.

He always rode around in it with sunglasses, always blasting music. And riding around ‘accidentally’ running over peoples feet, only to shout  
“AYE WATCH IT I’M DRIVEN ‘ERE!”

Back at the bachelor party, they heard the sounds of the little car enter the building, suddenly blasting ‘hardcore rap’ music  
“-THAT BITCH’S PUSSY BE HARD AS STEEL, WHILE MY DICK IS TITANIUM. GOT THAT PHAT ASS BE BOUNCIN ON MY POLE WHILE-” Noten shut off the music, drove circles around Jim and brought out a microphone  
“WHO’S READY TO LITE THIS FUCKER UP! LET ME HEAR YA!”  
no one replied  
“I SAID LET ME HEAR YA!”  
a weak yay from some of them  
“gee. No fun. ALRIGHT LETS. GET. THIS. SHIT. STARTED!”

a giant stripper cake was pushed into the building and moved over towards the group. The lights all pointed and lit up the cake, then party streamers shot our of it with a ‘bunny’ Steve jumped out.  
“LETS ST-WAIT WHAT?!” Steve suddenly covered himself up. He only wore a bow tie, bunny ears on his head, and a leather thong.  
The group suddenly had their mouths open in shock.  
“hey! You little gremlin you said this was for Eli!”  
“it is! As well as everyone else. NOW GET DANCIN HOE!”  
“i am NOT DANCING!”  
“whaaat you promised!”  
“YOU SAID THIS WAS FOR ELI. I ASSUMED THAT ONLY HE WAS GOING TO BE WATCHING! I AM NOT DOING THIS IN FRONT OF EVERYONE ELSE!”

“BOOO.” suddenly Mary booed out  
“i brought singles!”  
“OH MY GOD MARY” Claire covered her mouth. Toby was ready to leave  
“I’m out, I’ll see you all later” Noten stood up in his car  
“AWW NONE OF YOU KNOW HOW TO HAVE ANY DAM FUN! FINE, LEAVE! WE DON’T NEED YA! Alright bunny boy get your ass moving!”  
“Please Steve!” Eli asked 

“no one. Tell. Anyone. Anything. AND NO PICTURES!” Meanwhile Mary, Darci, Noten, and Eli were secretly already recording and snapping pics.  
Steve sighed, and started to ‘sexually’ dance. Or at least that was technically it……  
He did basic boring moves while Noten blasted music. Meanwhile Mary couldn’t stop laughing as she ‘made it rain’. Eli was the only one who kept Steve from stopping, cheering him on and saying how ‘amazing’ he is.  
Jim didn’t know if he should cry from laughing to hard, cringe, or both.

And as if out of nowhere, little fake glow in the dark penises started to be tossed around everyone. Littering the place, making it look Like little dick shaped glow worms.  
Steve tried to dance to the beat of the music and pretend only Eli was there. Wishing he didn’t agree to this. The little gremlin ALWAYS somehow had a bunch of dirt on everyone. He collected it like someone would stamps or trading cards. He always uncovered the darkest, worst things, threatening people and holding it over their heads. A real ‘prankster’ he was. Trading ‘info’ for ‘favors’. A master black mailer. 

Noten started to hand out drinks and party favors. People popping them sending small sparkles and streamers everywhere. Blowing into others, making loud noises. Noten yelled at Steve to get off the pole and come give Jim a dance. Steve said that went over the line. So they agreed that he would only dance on Eli. After a while Steve said he was tired and needed to call it quits. Noten just said he was being a big chicken, but agreed. 

“alright fine. Alright everyone, grab you’re dicks and lets head out! Part two!”  
Jim wiped tears from his eyes and tried to talk through hi pained ribs from all the laughing  
“p-part two?”  
“yep! Alright everyone get yer shit and wait outside. Steve, go clean yourself up and get dressed then meet us. Alright, let’s move it folks!”  
“what exactly are we doing?”  
“something fun! Not shut it and move”

with that, the music ended and lights returned to normal. The place was a total mess with everything.  
“uh...”  
“don’t worry, others are gonna clean it, fun night, not worry night.”

so everyone walked out of the building, to see Toby sitting on a bench  
“i thought you said you were heading home tobes”  
“i don’t have a ride! Nana is asleep by now, and I am NOT walking that far! So, what’s going on?” Shannon laughed and replied  
“fun sexy dancing”  
“cool...i guess?”

Noten had someone drive a van up to the curb  
“Alright party people lets move!” Toby asked  
“can I get a ride home?”  
“after this. Finished with the strip, time for the strip”  
“what?”  
“hop in! We’re gonna do some fun banging around!”  
“uh...”  
“not like that! Perv stuff over. Now get that ass in here and come have fun!”  
“okay….”

with that everyone got in, Steve was already in and dressed casually  
“so, think you can dance more often?” Eli asked  
“maybe.”

“FLOOR IT” Noten yelled and suddenly everyone was shaken from the sudden movement….

…………………………..

The van drove up to a large open concrete area. Noten turned from the ‘shotgun’ seat and said  
“alright, time for some bumpin and riden! Check that shit outtt!” he pointed over and pressed a button.  
Suddenly a bunch of Go karts with rubber rings came out of a large transportation truck  
“go over hop in and go crazy! Oh and no one better sue. Actually you all gotta sign this real fast…..” He handed out basic legal papers. The usual  
“if you get hurt, don’t blame us. Not our fault. You said you were chill with this” EXCEPT in a bunch of legal wording.  
“Alright everyone signed up? Good! No head over and pick yourself a fun one. Oh and we rented them out and ‘no ones lookin’ so go do whatever you want! No cops around means no laws around!”

Eli worried  
“Shouldn’t we wear helmets?”  
“pffft what for? No laws here! But fine. If you’re gonna wuss out. Here” Noten tossed a large ring of keys to him.  
“over by that truck is a storage shed, go grab one and whatever else.”

the group got out and practically ran over to the karts. They all got in, started them up and just bashed into each other. All of them were laughing and driving, teaming up against one another. A real fun time. Before they knew it, an hour passed. Pretty much all of them were dizzy and worn out by that point.

“alright, you kids have fun? Good. Now for the final act! Always use the rule of 3 after all.”

“what’s next?” Jim said rubbing his head.  
“no spoilers! Now everyone go pee, drink water, whatever the hell you need to do and get in the van for one final piece of fun.”

the van drove up to a large clearing way out in the wilderness. They parked and got out, there were chairs, drinks, and food. Everyone sat around while in the van Noten was yelling at someone angrily about something, it was too muffled to understand. The group talked about stuff and said what there day was like. Jim didn’t want to mention what happened with HIS DAY. He didn’t need everyone talking all at once at him. He had too much of a new upcoming headache to deal with it. The Van’s door opened up and Noten hoped over onto a table  
“alright, all set! Time to blow this shit up!” he pressed a button. Nothing happened.  
“give it a sec…..” still nothing. He pressed it again, then again. He threw it to the ground and then made a slew of swears.  
“fuckin son of a bitch whore slut shit cunt face! Hold on I’ll be right back” He ran over to the van, made an angry phone call. Then came out  
“okay! Any second now….better be or someone’s gonna loose a dick.”

Jim looked over at him  
“uh...should I be worried?”  
“naaahhhh don’t worry that pretty little head of yours. Your night! No one else matters right now.”

suddenly a loud shot rang in the distance.  
“uhhhhh”  
“what the fuck was that?!” Noten yelled angrily, grabbing his head and kicking a plastic cup to the ground.  
Then another one, then a massive boom! Beautiful fireworks went off, color after color, sparkling and crackling, all shapes and sizes.  
The group was awestruck by how amazing it was.  
“how did you-”  
“shhh. Shhhhh” Noten jumped onto Jim’s shoulder and put a finger to his mouth  
“don’t ask….also probably best not to know in case someone comes askin...uhh never mind that last thing”

they all watched for a while. Then when it finally ended they all made one big last toast…..

At this point everyone was tired and no one realized it was almost midnight. Everyone was being driven home in the Van. Until Shannon spoke up  
“wait….who’s Draal? Like, I’ve never even met him”  
the others agreed except for Claire, Jim, and Toby. The three smiled at each other  
“well, we’ll tell you all later. For now let’s just go home.”

the rest of the group agreed.

…………………………………

The second Jim got home he ate something small and said goodnight to his mom, saying he’ll tell her everything tomorrow when he has energy, showered and then plopped into his nest. Draal was still deeply asleep, something Jim didn’t really feel surprised about. He cuddled up to his mate and drifted off quickly.

He had fun that night. Surprisingly...


	5. Jim the mate....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a good day? talk to dad about your husband. talk to your dads about gifts. talk to grandpa about aesthetics. go get ignored by a moose. and come home to.....wait what?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, the newest trollhunter book just came out (the way of the wizard). this chapter (and from now on this fic) does take elements from it, which IS technically cannon in trollhunter universe. although, if you've read the books, you know it won't make any difference. well anyways! It's very minor spoilers, more of 'details' really,about Draals side of the family. other than that, its alllll fanfiction. so, heads up i guess?
> 
> well enjoy!

It was a nice sunny morning a few days later from Jim’s ‘bachelor’ party. Jim’s heat felt like it was in it’s final stretch. Jim had hoped it would end in the next couple of days. finally he could go back to thinking normally, instead of his usual crazy overly emotional hump happy thoughts he always had during this time. He did his morning routine, as he finished his shower and getting dressed he heard his phone ring. Blinky had called him asking to come down to the forge for some specific training. Jim agreed reluctantly. Usually he was given ‘days off’ when he was in heat, letting him not have to overly exert himself physically and emotionally. A part of him was also reluctant to go because he really hasn’t had much sex with Draal. Of course, he’s had plenty of hours, but still. To Jim, it was like how a kid got a brand new fun shiny toy! you want to play with it! it’s super exciting and interesting and new! you’ve always wanted one of them and finally have it!.

Jim just accepted the amount that he DID have already, but still hoped he could get a bit extra before the heat was over and his body moved on. Like getting that final squeeze out of a bottle of ketchup, or toothpaste, or what have you. 

The whole ‘troll wedding’ party was still going on, thankfully Draal had agreed to cool it with his partying. From Jim to Vendel to Blinky to Arrrg even, they managed to convince Draal to lower his ‘party dosage’ down to an ‘acceptable’ level. That didn’t mean they made him give up it, Jim wanted him to be happy and go have fun with his friends and do what he wanted to do. Draal said he wanted Jim to be happy, so he promised to make sure not to go on any more benders, both fighting and drinking, and come home every night.

Jim was heading downstairs after grabbing some of his belongings, water bottles, phone, amulet (of course) keys, and some energy bars. When he worked out, he worked out. Ever since he got his new form, he liked to spend all the extra energy and make himself stronger. Plus he did always laugh when he grabbed a troll by their horns and flipped them over. THAT trick helped end arguments in trollmarket quickly. 

Jim heard his mother talking while Draal walked past the staircase  
“-Draal sweetie could you grab those boxes and move them from the garage to the basement?”  
“ah hello my mate” Draal said smiling at his freshly groomed Jim, ready to start the day!  
“hey Draal”  
“you can call me your mate you know”  
“humans sorta say each others names”  
“hmpf.”  
“ohh don’t pout and huff, fine. I love you too, my mate”  
“there. that’s better.” Jim and Draal tapped horns together, a type of gentle greeting to trolls.

Horns are a BIG thing to troll culture. A bit less for the kinds without them, but with the ones that DID have horns, it was a big deal. Trolls locking horns or bumping them together meant a lot of different things. It ranged from  
‘hello’  
‘i love you’  
‘I HATE YOU’  
‘FIGHT ME TO THE DEATH’  
‘let’s spar playfully!’  
‘let’s celebrate!’  
‘THIS IS MY TERRITORY’  
‘goodbye’ 

it was all very subtle, something Jim was still having a hard time learning ESPECIALLY NOW since he has his own. It was like learning a whole new language. All the more difficult seeing as horns didn’t have words or writing, only very small differences. Those differences made a BIG DIFFERENCE though altogether. 

When Jim started to ‘train’ his horns, he started off….terribly. Or at least that was what he was told. Blinky and Arrrg wasn’t sure how to truly help him understand. It was just a natural thing, like an accent, something that you can’t just teach from a book. Over the years though Jim started to register the proper ‘inns and outs’ of ‘horn speak’. Draal always thought it was so cute when Jim had a hard time ‘speaking’ what he wanted to. He would go from  
‘hello’ to  
‘LET’S KILL AND CONSUME OTHERS’ in a single ‘sentence’ of bumping horns. One of the many things that crept around Draals heart, just adding onto the pile of things he loved about Jim.

 

“so how was that? Was it an I love you tap? Or a ‘feed me the flesh of the innocent’ kind?” Draal chuckled at the cute comment  
“you did well, exactly what you wanted to say. Although you greeted me as a friend and not your mate. We are still mates aren’t we?”  
“oh of course not! I actually was thinking of leaving you and going out with someone else! Maybe find a nice kubera. They seem nice, also handsome too! Plus my new mate would bring me all the rocks I could ever want”  
“HA! No kubera could EVER out do me. Or any other being for that matter. I shall bring you every rock I see from now on. Where shall I place them?”

the two love birds chuckled and looked into each others eyes. Only to be interrupted by Barbara coming out of the garage and back into the house  
“Draal did you grab the- oh good morning sweetie” Barbara kissed her son and hugged him  
“morning mom, sorry, I just had to pull Draal aside for a second” Draal sneered and huffed out his nose.  
“ahem.”  
“mate, sorry!. Mr pouty troll here is complaining I don’t call him mate instead of his name”  
“you should. It is only right”  
“anyways my mate and I, happy?, just needed to say hello OH I’M LATE! I gotta go! Tell Walt I said good morning gotta see Blinky at the forge” Jim sped walked past the two, hugging them each before he left. 

……………………………………

Jim sat cross legged next to Arrrg as he munched on a bunch of random things he was given. Mostly ‘troll food’ which just consisted of garbage and ‘questionable’ meat. The ‘may or may not be but probably is cat’ type, Jim never had any though. He didn’t want to start eating cats. He listened and paid attention to his adopted father/trainer  
“-now then, when Kanjigar the courageous struck the blow against the stalking along the river that very mornings first lights in Maine, what exactly did he do”  
“uh..he...did it….sideways?...”  
“correct….i suppose.”  
“okay uh, he used...uh….hmm….did an upward slash across the face. Then...had yet to finish it off until he used the cover of some trees then trapped it and well, killed it.”  
“GOOD! Now, we’re going to-” the familiar sounds of clunking and thunking at the center of the forge interrupted Blinky. The soothscryer slowly rose up and folded outwards.  
“and I was just getting to the good part.” Blinky said with disappointment as he closed a book he had in one of a pair of his arms.  
“guess that’s my cue...uh...I’m not in trouble for anything...right?” Jim said, standing up and brushing himself off along with his face and hands from any ‘food’ crumbs.  
“not that I know of.”  
“haha in trouble!” Arrrg giggled and smiled  
“Do not laugh! He could be in trouble! Anything from how he horribly failed his pop quiz I gave him about the 4th Trollhunters most prized possession within the 1st century of his duties. Or even death!. Well that was a bit over theatrical, however the-” Blinky turned around to see Jim was already gone.  
“if I could just finish my thought.”  
“I’ll listen!”  
“thank you my mate”

 

Jim felt the strange sensation of his body entering the void once more, like another, thin layer of reality pulling him into a small zip lock bag that slowly had the air taken out of it. He finished melding into the trollhunters afterlife to be greeted by Kanjigar

“Hello young one”  
“hey..so….what’s up? Am I in trouble? Okay I can totally explain why that sword was stuck inside that troll’s-”  
“no. not that. Thankfully….no I have a more...personal matter for you.”  
“oh uh, okay cool. So what is it?”  
Kanjigar took a few steps forward until he was face to face with Jim. Kanjigar looked him over, as if seeing Jim for the first time.  
“Would you like to take a guess?”  
“uh...not the sword thing….was it the Gnome problem? Okay how was I suppose to know they would learn about communism and then start-”  
“no. not that. Guess again.”

“uh….Was it something Blinky just said? Okay I’m sorry I don’t know what every specific move is called! Slashy stabby is all I know okay! it’s swinging a sword left or right, not ‘the grand strike of the heavens from the will of pure light’ okay! How am I suppose to memorize-”  
“hush little one. no. not that…..between you and me I felt the same way” Kanjigar whispered the last part and winked.  
“I’ll give you a hint. It is a private matter, a more personal one that everyone partook in however. something that happens here” Kanjigar touched where Jim’s heart was.  
“and happened here” Kanjigar then said moving his other arm around, waving across the forge.  
“uh..i..got stabbed? Look that lady had it coming-”  
“what?! How does her stabbing-you know what never mind that.” Kanjigar sighed  
“brighter than my son at the very least. Hint hint son hint.”

“...Draal was here?”  
“yes….go on”  
“...and...did something personal?”  
“yes. Warmer”  
“he failed?  
“no”  
“passed?”  
“getting warmer”  
“why play this game? Just tell me!”  
“And ruin our little fun, son”  
“what? Why did you-” suddenly it dawned on Jim. HIS and Draals courtship. The proposal the fighting the asking the pact the tattoos the partying. Then he remembered Vendel talking about how he would have that ‘interaction’ with his new father in law.

“i see on your face you finally understand” Kanjigar chuckled, putting his arms behind his back.  
“okay uh...i can explain...”  
“no need, I, along with everyone, have watched over you and his relationship develop. From becoming friends, to now mates.”  
“everything?”  
“everything”  
“….okay...uh...um” Jim blushed hard, the sudden imagines of him begging for Draal to breed him, stuffing Draals knot inside of him, begging to be came in. the biting and clawing Jim did to Draals chest and neck. 

Jim focused on the ground as if he’s never seen it before. His face hot and started to sweat nervously.  
“relax. We did not focus on...that.”  
“so you..did...see”  
“no. we knew it was coming, it was only a matter of time. I knew how much my son longed for you in his heart. Then, well. One thing led to another and your hearts connected. Perhaps after your bodies did but still. Ah, no need to feel shame or the like. I wanted to speak to you about this in person….well, you know, as much as we can get.” Kanjigar chuckled  
“No one else is here with us right now. Just a father and his new son. I wanted to tell you what I thought about you and my son’s relationship”  
“you’re not...mad right? Is it weird? Is it bad?”  
“no no nothing of the like. I wanted to say I’m happy.”  
“You are?”  
“yes. Very much so. You have such a good heart, mind, spirit, you truly are a perfect omega. My son of course, I love him dearly and no one should ever think I said or felt anything different, is lucky to have you. You and I can both agree that he isn’t the brightest of trolls. He thought to much of his muscles and fighting, rather than develop a knack for romance and love. Something humans have made into something far more complicated and complex. Go easy on him, he won’t understand all of it. Or even a fraction.

Your courtship makes me feel pride, two very important beings in my current state becoming one. It makes me feel alive in a way. I fully support the both of you, I wanted you to know you have more than my blessings for this. You are by far one of the only ones I truly approve of to become mates with my son. You even him out well.” Kanjigar smiled and patted Jim

“so...you...want us to be together?”  
“of course! Why wouldn’t I? you’re the perfect fit! He cares about you, you return the affections. You both work well together, you’ve built bonds over the years, you both know well enough of one another, you’re mother and….the impure….approve of him. You both make one another happy. If I had to choose anyone else to court my son, I couldn’t pick.”

“wow...uh...thanks Kanjigar”  
“call me father. If you’d like”  
“okay uh thanks...dad”  
“i said father but whatever, I give you my blessings along with my love. I look forward to watching and guiding both of you for the rest of your lives. No longer as just a requirement for the job, but as a father watching his sons. Hm, that sounded a bit strange on the end there. Well, you understand me anyways, right?”  
“yeah I do. Thanks for the support! I’ll tell Draal what you said and how you feel, I know he’s going to get a big kick out of it”  
“oh and don’t ever be afraid of coming to me to ask for advice on any kind of troll romance. Humans and trolls do things differently, that you know. But my son and I are from the monger tribe. Our ways are a bit more….aggressive. if my son ever gives you a hard time, knock some sense into him with a ‘slashy stabby’” Kanigar laughed and patted Jim on the back, a bit too hard, causing Jim to stumble a bit.

“I wouldn’t feel good bad mouthing your son to...well...you”  
“bad mouthing? All you would be doing is asking me for advice on what do do and how to do it. If you ever don’t understand things because my son has a... Well, ‘him’ moments shall we say, just ask and I shall answer.” Kanjigar sighed peacefully through his nose.  
“He takes a lot after his mother. She said I was the weak one in the relationship. Ahh I love her. She was right I suppose”  
“who is Draal’s mother?”  
“Ballustra. Powerful monger. I fell in love with her the first time I witnessed her crack a skull in half with one strong punch.”  
“sounds...romantic”  
“yes. Did you think Draal was violent for no reason? Our tribe is very battle orientated. His mother was by far one of the greatest blacksmiths to have ever lived. Forging only the best and most ruthless of weapons. She would agree”

“okay let’s back up for a sec. Overall, you think I’m perfect for Draal. You approve of me and our relationship, which I’m super happy about don’t get me wrong. And everything with...us..is going to not be awkward?”  
“of course not my son”  
“also...was that you when my amulet flashed after the fight?”  
“yes, along with everyone else. My heart felt swelled up from seeing my son win your favor. To have you accept his courting. I nearly cried. Deya almost kicked me in the gronk-nuks just to show me ‘what there REALLY is to cry over. She is a very tough woman.”  
“that’s...good? Well I’m glad you aren’t the kind that’s threatening me about being with your kid”  
“threaten? No no. you have won my respect long ago. I support you, like I spoke before. Speaking of kids. I know how you do not plan on having any in the foreseeable future, but you must understand my…..concerns. That you have yet to be impregnated. Are you...infertile?”

“wait?! noooo nono...well...i don’t know, but I’m taking birth control”  
“what is that?”  
“oh it’s uh, well there are a lot of different forms….to keep it simple. I’m taking these little pink pills that keep me from...well...having kids….”  
“ah I see. Well, that is a weight lifted off my shoulders to be honest. As long as you DO plan on bearing a whelp, I will wait, just like my son will. I respect your choices, your body is your own.”  
“thanks I’m really happy to hear that”  
“promise me when you are impregnated, you come tell me alright?” Kanjigar smiled, then hugged Jim.

“I’m proud to welcome you into my family. I truly wish the best for you. I shall always keep you both protected under my gaze. Worry not”  
“Thanks I won’t worry.” Jim hugged back. For being a ghost, Kanjigar felt...nice. Solid, warm. Strong, protecting.  
“i shall let you go now. Although I do have one last request”  
“shoot”  
“when the time comes for the both of you to...well….please make sure that he is not a selfish lover. I raised him better than to be selfish”  
“oookay I will. Uh thanks for everything gotta go”  
“why are you so skittish about sexual intercourse? it’s natural, everyone does it. If your mother hadn’t-”  
“OKAY I get it! It’ just a little...embarrassing I guess….”  
“is it your body? True it wasn’t what you were born with, but you should learn to love yourself, something humans have a hard time doing. Besides, you have all the right bits and pieces, healthy and functioning.”  
“yeaaahhh I do, okay I’m gonna go if that’s cool”  
“shall I tell you the story of the night his mother and I conceived him? Perhaps you should know the story and pick up a few ‘pro tips’ and possibly tell them to my son. You are the one on the ‘receiving’ end of the deal after all. you’re the one getting semen pumped into”  
“OKAY I’M GOOD THANKS, LET ME GO PLEASE!” Jim asked quickly walking over to the center of the forge, going next to the soothscryer.

 

“why the need to rush? Are you perhaps afraid you cannot conceive? I’m sure your womb is healthy and fertile.”  
“thanks for everything bye! Send me back now!” Jim at this point was sticking his arm into the device over and over again, hoping it would work already.  
“His mother truly was the powerful one. She was the one who took complete charge. She even blamed me for not being able to last as long as she wanted. And during heats? She-”  
“OKAY PLEASE STOP TALKING THIS IS GETTING UNCOMFORTABLE”  
“Do you have a healthy libido during your heats? As your father it is my duty to make sure you are as healthy as can be”  
“i wish for death.” Jim whispered under his breath  
“i shall not grant you that wish. However can grant you-”  
“JUST SEND ME BACK PLEASE!”  
“very well. I will speak to you on more private matters next time we meet. oh...what is it that humans say?...make sure my son brings his ‘A game’ in your nest. When you are to bear his whelp-”  
“please….let me go” Jim groaned and hit his head against the soothscryer.

“so emotional. Humans are strange things. My one last piece of advice. Give him a gift. Something that will show your great affection for him. He knows it well enough, but gifts are always nice and truly proves how you feel. I shall leave that up to you.” and with that Jim suddenly reappeared in the ‘real world’. He took a heavy breath and noticed he was alone. He let out a deep breath and fell on his butt  
“ugh…..guhhhhh….whyy did he half to say that stuff. Ugh, this is worse than when my mom was telling me about sex stuff for the first time…...gift huh?….better ask Blinky”

…………………………………….

Blinky gently brushed Jim’s fur thoroughly. Jim purred from the sweet affection. Blinky loved to give affection to Jim, also knowing that he enjoyed keeping appearances, so Blinky always made sure to keep Jim cleaned up, or at least as often as he could. Jim never disagreed either. Even Arrrg loved to be brushed from time and time again, so Blinky had a good amount of practice.  
“my that’s wonderful news master Jim! This causes for celebration!”  
“mmmh...wait no! No more celebrations and parties...at least for me...I’ve had plenty so far.”  
“not me!” Arrrg laughed. Blinky used one of his hands and a couple eyes to grab and open a book about various troll customs.  
“let’s see. A gift for a monger. Hmmm, well simply done, it would be some act of violence. The more intense the more affection shown.”

“okay...what...kind exactly?”  
“ahh! Here is a good example. Slaying the biggest creatures you can and present the corpse to your mate as a gift, this also works well on the ‘parents in law’. Knowing Draal he may very well be considering this for you in fact.”  
“i hope he doesn’t drag some giant dead thing to our house….”  
“well, it is a good possibility. Hmm, well you could always go simple, get him a nice weapon”  
“Draal has like, a million of them from pretty much every type there is.”  
“ah yes, his inventory is truly worthy of praise, but a gift of love is irreplaceable. Arrrg finds and gives me books from time to time. They may sometimes be books made for human whelps, but it’s the thought that matters and I love them for it.” Blinky looked over to Arrrg and smiled. Arrrg smiled and wiggled his eyebrows in return.

“hmm...weapon...well he really loves his ax….should I get him another one?”  
“it is his preferred weapon of choice. Perhaps browsing trollmarket would be helpful”  
“hm...i don’t know...i don’t want to just give him any regular ax. It has to be special, something really awesome!”  
“i suppose you could forge your own. Then again you have no experience in that subject and will most likely fail. Not that it’s a bad thing, it’s a perfect learning opportunity!”  
“actually...that does sound good...not me making it, but ME making it”  
“Forgive me but I do not follow”  
“i can get a whole bunch of awesome stuff, have some pro forge it all together, and get him a super powerful bad ass ax!”  
“This ‘bad ass ax’ does seem like it would be worthy of both you and Draal’s time. I have just the thing!” Blinky stopped brushing Jim and walked over to a few different book stacks, he pulled and placed a few of them on top of one another.

“here we are! A simplified guide to magical ingredients incantations and enchantments of all kinds. Volume 23 through 49. my preferred one is the 2nd in the collection, but that one is just so hard to come across. Now then, within these books we can look through it then pick and choose what you want to get. Think of it as a ‘magical shopping list’.” Jim reached for one of the books, it weighted a good amount of weight in his hands. Opening it and skimming the pages, looking for anything noteworthy that caught his eye.

“So, this is all magical stuff I can just gather up and throw together? Like cooking a dish with various ingredients. Make a few plain things into something amazing”  
“yes, I too would put it that way. So, anything that appeals to you specifically?”  
“hmm...well...hmm….everything looks good. Whats this shiny gold texture?”  
“a chuck of heartstone mixed with simple gold to be molded and shaped with iron to create a beautiful and strong metal. Typically highly rare and expensive.”  
“great. Not like I’m rich”  
“well perhaps you do not need wealth, we do have heartstone in trollmarket, all we need would be the iron and gold.”

“oh! I know!” Arrrg said as he got up and ran off.  
“so master Jim, anything else?”  
“i...don’t understand these words”  
“which?”  
“these ones”  
“ahh, those are trollish for strength unending.”  
“no I know what, its the spelling, I just don’t understand why it looks like that”  
“very old trollish. Think Latin for English.”  
“hmm, okay, I have an idea forming….get the ax, get the head to be double sided, make it all that fancy metal, engrave it with words and stuff, then I have the perfect gift! Oh man Draal’s gonna flip when he gets it!”  
“i doubt Draal will flip through the air like an acrobat, but he will be overcome with joy!”

“found it” the two looked up from the book to look at Arrrg who had re-entered the room. Their jaws dropped as Arrrg had a massive treasure chest on his back, he untied it and dropped it onto the floor with a massive thump. Opening it up revealed a ton of solid gold bars, various gold rings and coins from all different era’s. Arrrg dug out a large strange chuck of gold almost the size of his own fist.  
Jim was the one to speak up  
“where did you get all that?!”  
“found it”  
“where?!”  
“cave”  
“what was it doing in a cave?”  
“i dunno, treasure stuff I guess. Found it, took it, used as paper weight”  
“YOU WERE USING THAT AS A PAPER WEIGHT?!”  
“needed something. Make sure papers weren’t blown away”  
“why not just a rock?!”  
“i dunno. Was more pretty”

“so...are you giving that to me to use for Draal’s gift? Aww thanks Arrrg!”  
“love you. Here, take.” Jim walked over and tried to hold it, only to suddenly drop it by being way to heavy than he could lift.  
“oops. Too heavy. Sorry.”  
“it’s alright...hey what’s that”  
“NO. NOTHING. NO LOOK” Arrrg slammed the chest closed as Jim tried to reach for a strange piece of paper

“okay..uh...what’s wrong?”  
“dangerous. don’t want you to get hurt” Arrrg looked at the ground worried and sad crossed over to form his current expression.  
“well, thanks for looking out for me, but what is it exactly?”  
“….hm….”  
“please tell me?”  
“...promise to be safe?”  
“of course, what am I gonna do, get a paper cut?”  
“soul sucked out.”  
“uh...what”  
“soul sucked out.”  
“that paper is going to suck my soul out!?”  
“maybe. Dangerous.” Arrrg slowly opened the lid and carefully pulled out the piece of paper, very very old and tattered looking, stained from the centuries it lived through. Blinky came over and took it  
“….grumbling gruesomes! Where did you get this?!”  
“cave”  
“this was in the chest?! No wonder it was abandoned!”

Jim looked between his two adopted dads  
“what exactly is it?”  
“this is a very dangerous and ancient curse, designed to be applied to a weapon to slay ones enemies and siphon their very souls out of their bodies from their wounds.”

“okay, that sounds super dangerous and perfect for Draal. Can we use it?” Jim’s fathers looked at one another  
“perhaps not master Jim, we should find something a bit...safer”  
“aww but Draal would love it! Besides, other than sometimes misplacing his stuff, he’s very careful! Come on, let’s do it! Please? For me?” Jim started to make his big puppy dog eyes. Arrrg looked at him with guilt, like he was taking something away from Jim.  
“okay.”  
“what?! We did NOT agree to allow him to have this sort of enchantment!...although I suppose if it were carved into an object of great life giving force it would nuturlize the more dangerous side to it.”  
“like heartstone?”  
“oh….”

Jim smiled  
“see! We can mix them together and get a mega bad ass ax for Draal!” Blinky still wasn’t completely convinced about all of this, but with having to experience another moment of Jim’s puppy dog eyes, even he caved in  
“oh alright. Except we will only allow Vendel to properly direct this dangerous influence into the weapon!”  
“YES! OKAY, LET’S DO IT!”

………………………………

“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?, HAS THIS HEAT CAUSED YOU TO GO MAD?! You would allow Draal to possess such a dangerous weapon?! He is already too eager for any type of battle as it is, let alone giving him something as deadly as this! This terrible WEAPON you would allow- no. you will not convince me trollhunter with that look. Stop looking at me like that. You are NOT to…..” Jim had stepped up his game, making his eyes water a bit and made whimpers.

“you are too dangerous for even yourself. Fine. However I will only use a small SMALL amount of the enchantment. It will at least keep his blood lust down to a bare minimum. Which for Draal, is hardly anything small as it already is. I suppose you are his mate now, and can actually calm him down. Plus this would make him more eager to actually focus and listen to you. Ironic, Draal getting a powerful weapon calms him down, not causing him to be more ‘excited’ in suddenly trying it out. Although I suppose once you’ve hit the roof, there isn’t anymore ‘up’ you can go. This is your responsibility from now on. He does ANYTHING with this weapon and it’s your own neck on the line. Not mine.”

“thanks Vendel! Have I ever told you just how amazing you are?”  
“no. although you should praise me more often. Fine, come back later this evening and I shall have this ax forged. I shall even do a small engraving of your names together. A nice monger love engraving, I’ll even put something ‘romantic’ on it. Something like ‘i hope this weapon shall allow you to drink the blood of the world’. Yes, something along those lines. Monger romance truly is an affectionate one.” Jim listened to Vendel as he started to pull out various tools. He honestly couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or actually was being truly genuine. Jim didn’t bother to ask. Vendel then started to mumble under his breath and write things down onto some notes.

“so...”  
“you may leave now. I prefer to work in silence. Although….i do require you to fetch me a very very specific type of crystal. One found very very far away in a far dangerous place where the chances of survival are about a...hmm...rounded up, 3%.”  
“sounds fun. Anything for Draal!”  
“interesting. That tone of yours. It had more of an affection for a mate than a friend. You truly are wanting only the best for him. I do look forward to seeing how your relationship plays out. I doubt you two would ever truly argue. You both hold- I don’t feel like rambling on about ‘soft and sweet things’. If you want this done right, then leave and fetch me a crystal. Here is a picture and description, along with a guide to the locations they usually reside” Vendel slid Jim a piece of paper with a lot of information on it. The crystal looked like a mix of tigers eye and quartz.

“Canada? Alright, well here goes. I’ll be back, well, soon hopefully. Do I need anything?”  
“other than the will to see this through, no. oh and please stay safe. If you were to perish, it would not only throw trollmarket into hysteria, it would affect Draal even more. If you think he is blood thirst and wanting to kill now, just wait till you see what he’s like when a loved one dies. Hopefully you won’t ever have to witness it. It truly is horrific. Monger mourning's are not ones most others survive through and live to tell the tale. Even close friends, family, and neighbors are just as in danger as anyone else. Blood must be shed with blood. That is their ways.”

“don’t die, make sure Draal doesn’t loose anyone, got it. Alright, wish me luck!”  
“i wish you more luck to be able to reign in Draals aggression from now on. Everyone is looking at you to make sure he’s nice and calm. He is the only monger this side of the world at the current time. Most prefer to keep it that way. Nice to be able to go somewhere without worrying about your head being cleaved off by an enraged monger. Lovely culture.”

…………………………………

Jim was freezing! The cave he had to go into was far far far colder than the open tundra above. It seemed like the ice itself was trying to suck the heat out of his body. He hardly had to do much else other than walk around and find the entrances. Other than a few surprised and sleepy trolls, he came across no other living beings. He trudged through the cave, trying not to slip and fall, thinking warm thoughts. At home with his mother, sipping a warm stew he freshly made, laying next to Draal, snuggled up onto him in their soft nest. Jim moaned at the thought of his mate. His body had started to produce arousal pheromones suddenly and his body heated up.  
“Well, I guess that’s one way to help beat the cold...” Jim laughed.

Jim was going to ask if Blinky and Arrrg wanted to come along, but they were gone, leaving a note saying that Toby and Claire needed something from them. So it was only Jim who made his was through Canada!. He even got to pet a moose. Not as fun as it sounds. Simply because it was...boring. He didn’t expect it to jump through hoops. It just looked at him and left.

Jim thought Vendel was just messing with him about the 3% chance of living. There wasn’t any danger. Aside from the potential threat of freezing to death, slipping and falling, and being ignored by more moose. At least he thought that until he had to fight ice golems to get to even the smallest of crystals. They gathered around the crystals like they were their kings. Protecting them with their lives. Worst part? Unlike other golems, they revived almost instantly. So Jim snatched a decent sized one and fled before he could be frozen, clubbed, and ignored to death.

After heading back and feeling the massive shift from freezing to ‘boiling alive’ in temperature difference, he went back to Vendel. Comparing the tundras of Canada to the hot days of California, it really was a world difference. Jim walked into the heartstone, surprised to see the ax almost totally done, he was only gone for a few hours and the thing looked amazing! It was so shiny and polished and designed and strong and sharp.

“oh good you’ve returned alive. Hmm, a good piece too. I’m surprised you could make it that far. Typically the most anyone can usually get is about the size of a humans finger nail. Good job. Now, hand it over.” Jim did as was instructed and watched the old troll crush it up to dust and blow it across the face of the ax, causing its luster to grow even more. It glowed faintly for a few small moments before returning to normal.  
“there. One monger mate gift complete. I hope he appreciates all the hard work I did”  
“...i helped too”  
“yes, good job. Would you like a treat?”  
“…..”  
“I’m being honest, would you?”  
“uh...sure?” Vednel walked over and stuffed something into Jim’s mouth, it was hard like a rock but tasted like a cross between cinnamon and a small metallic flavor he couldn’t place.  
“here is your ax. Now go, I want to be alone. Enjoy the rest of your day” Vendel patted Jim on the head before turning him around and nudging him away.

………………………………..

Jim looked the ax over and over, looking at the finest details. It had similar deigns on it as the ones carved into Jim’s own body. Monger courtship. He breathed and felt warm and excited to see what Draal would think. He knew Draal would love it, but he wanted to see his reaction in person. The sun was almost entirely set and Jim finally turned down his street, ready for the rest of the evening. He thought about enjoying a nice relaxing time with his mate, cuddled into their nest. Jim purred at the idea, then snapped out of his happy day dreaming.

“WHAT IN THE WORLD?!” Jim gasped as he looked at the strangest scene. In front of him, was something he really didn’t expect would happen. He could hardly even figure out what he was looking at. 

In front of his home was police cars, their lights flashing, some cops had Noten handcuffed and carried him into a back seat while he swore out in the worse words ever created and then yelled  
“I WANT ME LAWYER! I KNOW ME RIGHTS” 

THEN across the street on Toby’s lawn, Arrrg and Toby were laughing hysterically, falling over and begging for help, saying they couldn’t breathe  
“HELP! HAHAHAHAHAH SOMEONE! HAHAHAHAHAH ANY ONE HAHAHAHAH IT HURTS SOO HHAAHHAHA MUCH!”.  
NEXT TO THEM was a pacing Blinky who had 4 espressos, one in each of his hands. He was rambling something so quickly Jim couldn’t even make out if it were trollish or English. He just walked around in circles as if oblivious to the world. Jim looked at his own home. It was LITERALLY sliced in half. Cleanly. As if someone took a massive knife and sliced through it like someone would to cake. Half of the house was just GONE. NO TRACE it ever existed. On HIS lawn was a heavily weeping Draal with Barbara who tried to comfort him and next to her was Walt on the phone looking really annoyed from whoever he was talking to. 

Jim’s mouth was agape and he couldn’t stop blinking, asking himself if this were even real. Jim slowly walked over to his mom, Walt and Draal.  
“uh...hi?” Draal sniffled and saw his mate, THAT was something weird. Jim has NEVER seen Draal cry before in all the years he knew him. Draal got up and ran over to Jim, hugging him tightly and saying how sorry he was for ruining everything. Barbara noticed Jim and said  
“oh sweetie there you are! I’ve been trying to reach you all day!”  
“sorry m-mom, I was in t-troll m-market all day, then C-Canada.” Jim said through his breath as he tried to loosen the ever tightening embrace of Draal.  
“Tell me later, right now things have gotten a little...”

Walt huffed loudly and looked, then annoyingly waved over at everything  
“a little?! You call this a little?!”  
“I’M SORRY!” Draal wailed out and cried into Jim more. Barbara tried to calm Draal by patting his arm and shushing him, saying everything will be okay.  
“okay answers please. Then I’ll tell you about my day”  
“Wait Jim is that an ax?!”  
“Draal, mate, please let go”  
“I’M SORRY, I DIDN’T MEAN TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN! I JUST WANTED TO KILL HIM!”  
“kill who?”  
“THE MONSTER!”  
“what monster?!” 

One of Barbara’s lens from her glasses fell out. She groaned and decided to put them away in her pocket.  
“well….it started right after you left….”


	6. HALLOWEEN 2018! TIME TO BE SPOOPY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A night of fear and terror! living monsters arrive! time for the night of fun to begin! 
> 
> how will everyone survive the dreaded holiday?! how will they be able to handle the intense scares!?
> 
> FIND OUT IN MY VERY FIRST HOLIDAY SPECIAL! =D
> 
> WHERE MA WITCHES AT?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> had a LOT of fun writing this! so, this isn't part of the 'timeline' (is there even one to begin with? XD) it's just a fun Halloween treat, i hope you enjoy it! never forget that i love to read comments! (even if i don't always reply, they make me happy and gasp when i see one)

Barbara walked into the kitchen getting herself something to eat. The door behind her started to slowly open. She was getting out a piece of pumpkin cake (cake shaped like a pumpkin and was pumpkin flavored, just making sure that was clear) when suddenly she heard a huge roar in the kitchen as Draal ran into it. Barbara jumped and dropped her food  
“DRAAL DON’T DO THAT.” Barbara leaned against the counter breathing heavily and adjusting her glasses as Draal just laughed

 

“what? I thought fleshbags loved this holiday!” Draal pulled a huge mask off his face. It was similar to a slasher mask (classic hockey) with dried blood, the texture of bone, and spikes jutting out of it all over, like someone hammered nails outwards. The eyes were pitch black with small red glowing dots in the centers. Draal was wearing leather straps with spikes studded into them, also wore metal chains wrapped around himself, over his chest and neck, arms, waist, etc. (imagine something similar to raider armor in fallout 4) All over him, he was drenched with ‘fake’ blood, all dried to give it that extra eerie feeling. His horns were painted black with florescent red blood splatters (he really went deep into blood covering him from head to toe)

“Not when I’m scared half to death. Well, your costume looks scary.”  
“thank you, I wanted to appear as something that would kill you by ambush”  
“i guessed that, well don’t you look nice, I like the fake blood, it does have a strong smell though”  
“fake blood?”  
“...is...is that real blood?”  
“do not fear. It is not fleshbag blood…..Jim forbade me from using it….”  
“what...kind of blood is it? You know what, I don’t want to know.”  
“will you be joining us in this evening of extortion?”  
“i...guess that would be considered the technical term...but no, I won’t be, I’ll be here handing out candy to the children”  
“What candy?”  
“the ones I put...wait...did you eat them?”  
“….uh….”  
“Draal. Those were for the children tonight!”  
“sorry...sorry...” Draal tapped his hands together awkwardly.  
“great. I doubt any candy will be left at the stores. Maybe I could give out apples.”

 

the backdoor opened as Walt walked through it carrying some Halloween decorations.  
“oh goodie, I would just love having the house ruined by angry teenagers.” Barbara walked over, grabbed some of the decorations from his hands and kissed him  
“well what exactly did you have in mind?”  
“candy. Did you think I wouldn’t be prepared for this outcome?  
“so you knew he was going to?”  
“I’m surprised you didn’t”

“I’m right here impure.”  
“Draal don’t call him that”  
“...sorry….Walt…..”

………………………………..

Toby was putting the finishing touches on his outfit, it was simple enough. Dark cloths, long cape, cheesy vampire fangs, and a small crown on top of his head. He picked up his phone and texted his friends to group up at his place. The gang had made a fun plan of having their own small halloween get together before the night started. They would eat food, hangout, and the main plan, binge watch scary movies!. Toby quickly had to take some stuff over to Jim’s house, some old stuff he doesn’t use anymore for halloween decorations. It mostly came from storage that Nana wanted to give away. The lakes happily accepted the offer. He grabbed a couple of box’s and headed across the street. He walked through an already open door, announcing his presence of course  
“knock knock! Here’s the stuff, so you ready Jim?”  
Barbara thanked him then started to open the boxes up and proceeded to move them around and figure out just where they should go. Jim came down from his room in his regular cloths.

“yep all set”  
“where’s your costume?”  
“I’ll just do that tonight” Barbara asked for help moving a large mirror from the wall, which Jim easily lifted up by himself.  
“so, what are you boys up to tonight?” Toby cleared his throat and smiled  
“we’re going to have an all day movie binge, horror of course, then go out trick or treating”  
“Aren’t you a little old to be doing that?” Barbara smiled. She scratched Jim’s head and thanked him for the help  
“aww come on Dr.Lake! We only get like...100 of these in our lifetime!”  
“assuming you live to be 100”  
“exactly! Pluuussss it will be fun!”  
“as long as you boys are safe”  
“Well, Jim’s going to be with us. Have you seen your son?” Toby gestured to a Jim snacking on an old broken clock. He swallowed and talked through what was left in his mouth

“hss rig moom, evhering be fin”  
“it’s not like were little defenseless kids. We literally have THE most dangerous thing with us! The worse that happens is he ends up eating something he shouldn’t.”

Jim swallowed again as Barbara looked at her son  
“you know I worry about you”  
“classic mom stuff, it’s fine! it’ll be all of us together, and if it makes you feel any better, Eli will be with us, so you know for a fact we won’t have fun”  
“be nice to him, and yes that does make me feel better”

Eli was the type to constantly worry about everything  
“what if someone poisoned this! It was open!”  
“what if someone tries to actually kill us! Statistics show-”  
“what if someone gets kidnapped! There are plenty of reports-”

He really was a wet blanket. He DID have fun, after he loosened up. Within recent years he’s relaxed a lot more. Still, he WAS himself.

Draal came into the room reeving up a chainsaw, Toby and Barbara jumped from it. Draal just laughed like it was the funniest thing in the world. Barbara continued decorating and said  
“Draal has been doing this all day. I swear he’s going to give me a heart attack.” Jim looked at Draal and his outfit  
“Draal, don’t give mom a heart attack, where did you get that chainsaw? We don’t own one”  
“i purchased it”  
“did you ACTUALLY buy it with ACTUAL money this time?”  
“YES! I did in fact. I learned my lesson.”

many many many times Draal’s had the habit of  
‘i saw it first it’s mine back off or I literally will beat you to death with your own limbs while your children watch’ type of taking. It was just a troll thing, you saw it, you got it. As long as no on else owned it. They also had little concept of an economy. So they didn’t really use any standard currency other than just basic trading. So Draal would see something in actual stores, take it and walk out casually. He was reprimanded and reminded he had to use actual money. He usually sighed since he could never figure out how much he needed. He had a hard time remembering what costs what, how much this is worth, which currency to use, how much certain bills and coins were worth, and tax? don’t even try to explain it. 

“so where did you get the money?”  
“why do you question me so much? Do you not trust me?”  
“i dooooo, I’m just a little...skeptical….” Toby spoke up and joked  
“did you rob a bank?”  
“yes” 

Barbara turned around  
“is that a joke Draal?” knowing the big blue ball boi, it was an actual possibility.  
“no, I really did retrieve money out of a bank”  
“DRAAL!”  
“what?! Jim said I was allowed to!”

the three others in the room look at Jim  
“okay, I NEVER said you could rob a bank!”  
“yes you did, you said and I quote: ‘you may take money out of it whenever you need to’”  
“wait are...are you talking about the PIGGY BANK?!”  
“what other place would I be referring to?”  
“i thought...we thought….never mind. Well I’m glad you got-wait is that a REAL one!?”  
“yes, what else would I purchase? A fake one would not suffice. This has actual purpose, I could use it in a variety of ways, including disemboweling others tonight”  
“Draal, we don’t ACTUALLY kill others, remember?”  
“ooohhhh. I’m glad you said that...”  
“DID YOU KILL OTHERS IN THE PAST?!”  
“…..not….humans”

“no one here wants to know it probably. Point is, no killing. And return the chainsaw”  
“i lost the receipt”  
“well, there goes that money.”  
“do not be sad! We could also use this to cut food!”  
“we don’t use chainsaws on food!”  
“it has blades, we use blades, why not? Humans are so stingy.” 

Toby looked at his phone which buzzed  
“okay, Eli and Steve are on their way, let’s get going” Draal asked Toby  
“where are you going with my mate?”  
“Movie night duuuh, we plan on-” Toby noticed Jim making a ‘kill it!’ motion with his hand and neck.  
“movie night? Why wasn’t I invited?”  
“uh...no...couples?”  
“you just spoke of the fleshbag couple departing to your home.”  
“….uh….i mean, no...uh...well they’re bringing stuff”  
“i can bring my belongings”

Barbara asked  
“why won’t you just tell Draal about it?”  
“Tell me about what? I’m confused.”

Jim sighed, walked over and laid a hand on Draal’s chest  
“look. we’re having a scary movie binge. We didn’t invite you cause you kinda….just laugh at everything, kinda kills the mood”  
“it’s funny! Fleshbag attempts at scaring one another is amusing. I can easily do better.”  
“we know.”  
“i wish to attend!”

“alright, let’s just let him come Tobes”  
“uuughhhh fine! But you better not laugh or make too much noise! We wana get scared”  
“i can do that”  
“then it’s a deal.”

……………………………..

The group sat down in Toby’s room, a bit crowded now, but made themselves comfortable. Claire was dressed as a witch, Shannon was a zombie, Darci was a creepy nurse, Eli and Steve dressed up as demons, and Mary didn’t have a costume.  
“Excuse me, but where is your costume exactly?” Toby said with sass.  
“dressing up is for little kids”  
“i like dressing up..” Shannon said a little embarrassed  
“everyone here does, except Mary”  
“besides, not like I’m going trick or treating like you kids are. I’m going to something a little more my speed, I’m going to a party at Claire’s.”

“what party?” Claire groaned as she remembered  
“great. that’s right. Noten said he was going to throw a Halloween party.”  
“aaannnnddd your parents agreed to that WHY?”  
“because, he promised he would make sure the house was spotless and no one would have the cops called on them.”  
“where’s your parents in all this?!”  
“going out with my baby brother to some fancy neighborhood. Supposed to be really nice and well decorated”  
“Surprised you didn’t want to go”  
“i did, buuut I wouldn’t want to miss hanging out with my friends”

Eli awwwed at that. Toby waved a Dvd in his hand before putting it in  
“okay let’s get started! So, slaughter falls first.”.

………………………………..

“why is she such a dumb bitch!? don’t go into the basement!” Mary said. Jim chuckled.  
“last time I went into a basement to check out a creepy noise, I became the trollhunter”. Draal wanted to say something, but decided to keep his mouth shut. 

……………………

Eli jumped as someone in the movie crashed through a door. Steve laughed and held him. Draal wanted to remark that he saw it coming, and Eli was a wimp. He just hugged Jim closer, who was sitting in his lap, and ignored his thoughts.

……………………………………………..

Movie after spine chilling movie played, the hours went by and almost everyone was shaking, all except for Draal. The group had decided to call it quits as the sun was about to go down, some trick or treaters had already been out and about. Nana was hanging out candy and complimenting all the kids costumes. Mary said goodbye, leaving to the party. The rest cleaned up and got ready for the night. Toby, Claire, Jim, and Draal went back to Jim’s house, while the others said they would meet up somewhere else.  
“okay Jim, costume up” Toby said, adjusting his outfit and putting his fake fangs back into his mouth. Jim nodded and headed upstairs, Draal went and got his chainsaw. Jim came back downstairs armored.  
“uhhhh, what do you think you’re doing?” Claire said with sass.  
“what? it’s my costume, I’m the trollhunter!”  
“you can NOT be that!”  
“why not?”  
“you can’t dress up as your job!. Your mom isn’t a doctor, Walt isn’t a dean, Draal- well Draal is actually dressed up as a blood hungry psycho.”  
“well I don’t have anything else to wear”  
“come here.” Claire walked over, grabbed Jim by the horn and pulled him to his room (the troll version of pulling someone by the ear)  
“hey hey! Watch it!”  
“quiet” 

……………………………………………….  
Jim was sitting in a chair while Claire put makeup on his face.  
“okay….a little here….bit darker here...”  
“are we almost done? I feel like I’ve been sitting here forever.”  
“we have hardly done this for 10 minutes. Now then, we just need to put a little more around your eyes…….alright, that should do it.” Claire held up a mirror and showed Jim. He had dark marks under his eyes, cuts on his face, bit of blood here and there.  
“so what exactly am I supposed to be?”  
“you’ll see. Now put that shirt on and then close your eyes.” Jim did as he was instructed. 

He had shown his friends his engravings, they even touched them. They were surprised to find out that trolls had them done when they got married, Jim replied that he was just as surprised, he honestly never even knew of them before that day when he got his own. They asked him about what it was like, he said it was just a dull pain all over, then being very sore afterwards.

Jim finished carefully putting on his shirt, making sure it wouldn’t disturb the makeup. It was a now sleep wear shirt. Before, it was one of Jim’s favorites, until he caught Draal eating it. Now it had a bunch of tears and bite marks in it. Jim then sat down, closed his eyes, then felt something go around his neck and tighten up enough to keep it still.  
“now let me just brush your fur and we’ll be all finished.”  
“can I open my eyes now?”  
“not yet, keep them closed.”

Jim felt his fur being brushed up and teased. It felt somewhat nice to have someone brush him.  
“there, all finished, you can open your eyes and see my master piece.” He looked into the mirror but didn’t fully get it.  
“what am I? Some goth?”  
“nooo, you’re a werewolf!”  
“ohhh, yeah I see it, nice”  
“why thank you. Now take off your pants and put those torn up ones.” another piece of clothing, fallen fate to Draal's appetite.  
“want to leave?”  
“why? Oh who cares if you take your pants off, I won’t look. Besides we’re best friends, does it really matter?”  
“guess not...”

…………………………………………………..

“uuugghhh what is taking so long!” Toby was sitting on the couch bored to death, he was on his phone seeing all the pictures that were posted by Mary. The house party looked really crazy. Black lights, fog machines, creepy Halloween decorations, ‘spooky’ rave music was being played she said, lots of chaos, lots of ‘spooky’ food, although knowing troll food who knew what was actually in it…Mary looked like she was having a ton of fun, totally opposite of what Toby was having at the moment. Toby would look outside and see all the people dressed up and walking around outside going from house to house. His friends finally came downstairs. Toby complained about how the night was started and how long they were taking.  
“ohh werewolf?”  
“yes”  
“niiceee”  
“Claire did this” hearing the praise made Claire feel good, then felt upset as she checked her phone to see the pictures Mary took of the party going on at her house. One especially annoyed her because it was a selfie of Noten and Mary, normally she wouldn’t care, but it was the fact that in the background the lamp was half eaten and the couch had bite marks all in it and chunks eaten. 

“nice photo’s right?”  
“no.”  
“knew you would say that. Okay lets get going!”

Barbara came back inside from hanging out candy.  
“so many more kids each year, already ran out of the first bowl. Awww don’t you look cute!” Barbara stroked Jim’s fur  
“I’m not cute mom, I’m scary.”  
“alright my scary little...what are you?”  
“werewolf...with horns.”  
“well you look great”  
“Claire did all this, thank her”  
“we'd you get the collar? I think it looks cute on you” 

Claire adjusted said collar so it faced the right way and said  
“helped out at a dog shelter, they let me have this, knew it would come in handy for Jim” Jim blinked in surprise.  
“uhh what?”  
“well if you ever run off and get lost, someone can call the number on a tag we give you so we can know where you are” Claire said in a joking tone.  
“gee, don’t I feel like a pet now.”  
“hey it could come in handy”  
“haha very funny. I look like a dog”  
“you are a werewolf”  
“fine I’ll wear the collar. No pet jokes”  
“oh come on, we all know you love to joke about it too”  
“...okay fine yeah I do”

 

Toby Groaned  
“can.we.go.now?! you’re worse than Nana!”  
“wait where’s Draal?” Barbara filled the candy bowl up and told them  
“he went to trollmarket, said he was going to tell Blinky and Arrrg about tonight.” Jim did a hmm  
“not sure how to feel about that.”

Toby pet Jim and felt his collar  
“why not? More the merrier!”  
“weeellll don’t you think having them come would be a bit….much? You know Blinky would just talk facts all night about every detail of every history that involved tonight, and Arrrg might get freaked out from everything.”  
“freaked out about what? He LOVES candy!”  
“well all the gore and scary stuff. Might trigger him.”

“He’ll be fine! you’re right though, let’s be careful where we go then”

 

…………………………………

Blinky and Arrrg had come from trollmarket to experience the holiday. Draal had convinced them to partake in the night. Blinky has wanted to try doing more ‘human holidays’ so he happily agreed, Arrrg followed, being promised lots of candy. When they arrived at Jim’s house, Blinky learned that children will actually come to homes to retrieve treats, he felt like this was a perfect opportunity to teach the ‘youth of today’ about history. So he decided to stay home, help out with the candy, and talk about the history of the holiday. Very, very, dull, long, explanations. Barbara however actually paid attention and said she found it interesting. Walt mentally disagreed with her, but kept it to himself. Arrrg had left and went with Draal, Toby, Claire, and Jim to walk around and see the sights. Until it went bad.

The little group hadn’t realized just how stressful the night was for him. He was feeling anxious after the a bit, then was barraged by all the darker aspects of Halloween. All the violence and gore got to him. He started to freak out, body glowing and him whimpering. He suddenly shut down, holding his head and closing his eyes. The group comforted him, Toby was the first to try and calm Arrrg down.  
“hey it’s okay.”  
“scary...”  
“yeah it is...this wasn’t really the worst part”  
“leave. Want to go home.”  
“Okay, we can go home. Guys I’m gonna take Arrrg back, I’ll meet up with you later”. The other agreed and said their goodbyes. Arrrg wouldn’t stop whimpering and tried his best to just look at the street as they walked away.  
“ruined your night...”  
“what? No you didn’t!”  
“yes.”  
“if you don’t feel comfortable, then I don’t either. I want you to have just as much fun as I do.”  
“scary.”  
“yeah Halloween gets pretty...intense...”  
“don’t like Halloween.”  
“oh! I know! Hey wing man, it’s alright, you can still enjoy the night, it’s not juuust about scary things”  
“it’s not?”  
“nooo! there’s plenty of fun things that aren’t scary!”

“like what?”  
“well, there’s still candy, oh and costumes aren’t all scary, they can be fun! there’s also games to play, ohh I bet you would love to bob for apples!”  
“bapples?”  
“it’s a game where-actually I don’t want to ruin the surprise. Here I can show you.”

…………………………………..

The group walked away after Toby left with Arrrg. Jim knit his eye brows together.  
“i feel bad. We shouldn’t have brought him.” Claire fixed her witch hat and replied  
“we did want to include him, it wouldn’t have been nice to just ignore him either”  
“i know, I just...i feel like we hurt him.”

Draal pulled Jim close into a hug  
“you did not ruin him. Years of bloodshed and violence has ruined him. Does that make you feel better knowing it?”  
“not...really, thanks for trying though...”  
“i will always try. Shall we leave to make love? Perhaps that would make you feel better. I know how to make you moan in delight and pleasure-”  
“HAHAH! Draal no. let’s not talk about that. we’re with Claire and about to be with the others.”

Claire cleared her throat  
“speaking of, how about we hurry up and meet with them.”

………………………………………….  
Eli, Steve, Draal, Claire, Jim, Darci, and Shannon all met up at a small old park. Eli was trying to convince them of something.  
“okay okay okay, I know how much you guys wanted to go trick or treating. But, now just here me out, but what if we….went to a haunted house!”  
“i don’t feel like walking through crowded hallways and having someone jump out at you” Darci said.

“no no not THAT kind of haunted house, I mean an actual ghost filled one!”  
“ghosts don’t exist”  
“yes they do! And I’m gonna prove it!”

Claire, Jim, and Draal looked at one another and whispered  
“should I tell him?”  
“nah. Let him have his fun.”  
“well in all technicality, we have only ever seen ghost trolls, not human”

 

Eli looked around  
“come on guuyyss it will be fun! I even have some equipment!”  
“you bought stuff?” Steve asked as he hurled a rock at a tree  
“yeah! I got a good price online and it got great reviews and I always wanted to go talk to ghosts! I want to know what it’s like!” Eli bounced excitedly as he explained. Jim smirked and said under his breath  
“not as exciting as you would think”. Eli gave pleading eyes to Steve  
“pleaaseee”  
“okay, stop using that look against me”  
“never will it end”  
“you’re to cute for your own good”  
“you’re to handsome for your own good”  
“Well I think-”

Claire fake coughed  
“okay I’m in for ghosts if it let’s us hurry up and do something, spooky night time only lasts so long”  
Jim agreed and said he was in, eventually everyone had agreed. Eli said he knew the perfect place….

………………………………………………….

Toby decided to make sure Arrrg could celebrate and enjoy the night and not feel left out!. Perfect way to do so? Show him the fun stuff!. Toby showed him cute things like kids costumes, nightly activities (Arrrgs favorite was in fact bobbing for apples, only problem was that he just drank all the water and ate all the apples in one go. Still, he had fun) he watched costume contests, carved pumpkins with Toby, and of course, stuffed himself with candy, eating bag after bag while Toby had ‘tapped out’ after roughly half a bag. Most of the stuff he couldn’t eat anyways because of his braces. Eventually Arrrg had wanted a costume of his own!. Now, to just figure out what he wanted to be and how they could do it…...finally Arrrg had the perfect idea after watching a certain movie and looking at cute kids.  
“lion”  
“lion?”  
“lion.”  
“okay! I can see it! let’s do it!”

So they did, Arrrg was brushed and styled to have a mane, or at least a green one. They put fuzz on his tail, and cat ears on his own ears. They drew whiskers on his face and dyed his fur brown, or at least tried to, only to get a goopy weird color. Arrrg was happy with his look then said he wanted to go out and have fun some more, so they did. Arrrg watched the trick or treaters go around from place to place, a lot of them complimented his costume saying how realistic it was and amazing he looked. Arrrg thanked them and felt great, thinking his costume was amazing, even though the kids were talking about his actual body, Trolls aren’t usually ‘out and about’ around humans too often, so this was the kids first experience. Arrrg played with the kids, loving how innocent and friendly they are. He gave them back rides and let them climb all over him. Sure his hair was pulled countless times, but he didn’t care, he was having too much fun with them. He never did sweat the small stuff. Finally it was too late out now and everyone started to go home, Arrrg felt sad all his new ‘little friends’ had to go home, he waved goodbye and said he was glad to have tried Halloween, even if it was scary. He loved it and Toby was happy his wing man had fun and wasn’t left out. The two decided to retire back to Toby’s house and play video games.  
“super fun tonight”  
“yeah! I’m glad you loved it, especially since this was your first time. So, want to do it again next year”  
“yes! Just..no scary”  
“i promise, it can be just like this”

they fist bumped then heard  
“Toby pie, your friends are here, including the cat one and the big one”  
“thanks Nana! Send them up!”

the door opened and Eli and Steve practically collapsed onto the floor. Eli just laid on Steve’s chest and groaned into him. Toby just raised an eyebrow  
“….care to explain?” Jim, Draal, and Claire came into the room. Claire’s outfit was shredded up, meanwhile Jim was shirtless. Draal looked like his costume was cut up, other than that he was the same, minus his chainsaw.

“what happened to you guys?” Claire sighed and tossed her hat aside as she sat down  
“long night...” Jim stretched and moved his body around, flexing his sore muscles saying  
“I’m glad I have to only deal with the trollhunters of the past. Tonight was awful. Did you two have fun at least?”

Arrrg smiled and nodded along with Toby’s “totally”  
“I’ll tell you guys about tonight if you tell me about yours”  
Draal managed to fit himself in a corner and sat, Jim laid against his chest  
“long story short, we talked to ghosts. Shit hit the fans real fast” Draal groaned  
“i lost my chainsaw to that vile creature. Why is Arrrg a large cat”  
“lion” Arrrg smiled then Toby looked at his worn down friends  
“ooookay I need a full story, now I’m interested”

…………………………………………………….

“this is the place!”. Eli said as he stood anxiously across the street with everyone, looking at a large decrepit building. It seemed to be some large empty building that used to be a storage center for various things, then made into a make shift school, then abandoned. It was a very old building, the oldest around In fact. It was fenced off due to being a dangerous area. Eli shuffled some of his bags around he was carrying, readjusting them while pulling out  
“I’ve got everything! Cameras, thermal vision, night vision, EMF meters, laser grid, audio recorders, temperature gun-” Jim looked through some of the bags  
“how much did you spend on all of this stuff?”  
“i might...have spent like...maybe….a liiiiitttllleeee over...1,000$”  
“WHAT?! I COULD HAVE JUST TOLD YOU ABOUT GHOSTS FOR FREE!”  
“well anyone could just talk about ghosts for free Jim!”  
“that’s not….yeah I guess you’re right.” Jim sighed, now he felt bad for how much Eli had spent over time collecting this gear.  
“alright, let’s go on in!”. Steve put an arm around Eli  
“babe. If yo get scared, you can always come to me” Jim laughed  
“and if YOU get scared, you can come to me” Draal looked at Jim  
“and if YOU get scared, you can come to me” Claire laughed at that.  
“what witch? You think I will frighten? I fear nothing!”  
“what about Jim not wanting to be with you anymore?”  
“….i have one fear” 

Jim touched Draal’s chest  
“i won’t leave you” Draal purred deeply at that.  
“can we go? It’s getting late and really cold” Darci complained as she shivered.

 

The group entered the home, after Draal tore a piece of the fence out of the ground  
“oops...sorry….sorry...”  
they walked through the opening and then proceeded to walk through the spacious and decrepit building. Shannon shivered along with Darci and said  
“okay...this is….scary….uh so...how long are we going to be in here?” Eli adjusted his glasses and chose a spot to set the equipment down at.  
“until we contact the dead!. This seems like a good spot. let’s do it!”  
“how….often have you done this?”  
“this is my first time” Steve snickered  
“I’ve heard you say that before” Eli blushed  
“n-not now S-steve!. A-and this is going to be fun! Now help me set up.”

so they began, it took about 10 minutes of setting up, turning on, getting good even spots to set things down on, clearing out a good sitting spot, until finally they began. Eli turned on his camera  
“spirits….if your here…..give us a sign”  
“...haaaave sexxxxx wittttthhhh steevvee….” Steve whispered in a ‘spooky way’.  
“not now Steve! I wana do this seriously”  
“You shhhooouuulllddddddd”  
“Steve!”  
“what? The ghosts want us to bone down!”  
“you’re the one-” the EMF started to go off  
“huh, guess the ghosts really do want to have sex”  
“no they don’t!”

Jim started to sniff and smelled the equipment, he closed his eyes and started to gently lick them. Eli noticed this and whisper shouted  
“hey hey hey hey! Bad Jim! don’t eat those!” Jim’s eyes opened then he suddenly stopped and pulled away  
“sorry….” Draal looked around he then got a mean idea…..he quietly walked away when no one was noticing….

The group had started to sit in a circle, lighting candles and tuning the equipment for better signals  
“if anyone is there, prove yourselves, snuff out a candle. Please” Eli said swallowing as the candles flickered.  
“I don’t think anythings going to work-” Shannon said then yelped as the candle went out. Darci rolled her eyes  
“it was just the wind! it’s super drafty in here” Claire made an unsure face  
“i mean, maybe, maybe not. Magic stuff isn’t very straightforward with reason” Steve made an over dramatic voice  
“ohhh great spirits of old, show thine selves! Prove to Eli he should suck dick! My dick!” Eli blushed  
“Steve!”  
“what? It’s Halloween lets have fun!”. Suddenly a loud bang echoed down the hallway and three candles snuffed out. Eli screamed and practically jumped over to Jim, clinging onto him. Steve frowned and felt hurt  
“heyyy, I’m your boyfriend!”  
“Steve. I love you, never ever ever think anything differently. But you don’t have a magic sword made out of light that can make things explode….Jim you DID bring the amulet...right?”  
“uh oh….uhhhh..”  
“J-jim!”  
“I’m kidding! Of course I always bring it. it’s practically like-” Jim was interrupted as another loud bang echoed. Darci and Shannon scooted closer to everyone else.  
“C-C-Claire J-Jim, ghosts aren’t real right? you’re the ones who do the magicy stuff”

Claire smiled mischievously  
“Oh ghosts exist”  
“n-not f-funny Claire” Jim looked at Eli who now was practically holding Jim’s chest. Jim just rubbed Eli’s shoulder  
“it’s alllllright everyone. If anything happens I can protect all of us. Also yeah ghosts exist”

then everyone besides Claire and Jim gasped and all at once dramatically yelled  
“WHAT?!”  
“yeah, Well, I mean, troll ghosts of past trollhunters exist at least. See, there is this thing called the void I visit and they sorta all just hangout there and give me advice and my father in law, Draal’s dad, he-hey wait….where is Draal?” everyone looked around and Steve whispered  
“how do you loose a giant rock guy?!” Jim smirked as he looked around  
“trust me. that’s something I ask myself all the time when I can’t find him”. Jim started to get up, only to have Eli cling onto him more  
“where are you going?!”  
“Well I’m going to go find out what it is, if it IS a monster and not a ghost, kinda my job to make sure things are all clear”  
“d-don’t leave us!”  
“well then come with me”

Claire got up and the group looked at each other  
“Well I’M not sticking around here to die. I’d rather be next to the guy with the magic sword” the other agreed. So now, Jim was carefully walking down a hallway, with everyone else behind him, being as close as possible. Another loud bang. Then another. Then what sounded like claws on a chalk board.  
“Draal, is that you?” Steve said trying to sound confidant but lacking it completely. The sound of something breaking and then being thrown somewhere made everyone jump and huddle close enough behind Jim that he felt like he suddenly had a suit of human.  
“J-J-Jim can you-s-sense anything?” Eli was shaking, he was also right next to Jim, the closes one, then Steve right behind Eli. A little jealous that Jim was getting the attention.  
“well...i can’t smell anything. Or see anything. And I can’t hear anything with everyone right in my business. So SHUSH.” they all became as silent as the building. Jim moved his head and ears around, figuring out just where the sounds had originated from.  
“Well….it’s too empty, everything just echos. I can’t smell anything except all this dust.” Steve laughed fearfully  
“oh, I have an idea, let’s go home and eat candy and make fun jokes”  
“awww, is the big alpha of the group scared?”  
“not. Funny. Jim.”  
“Well, I mean, a big strong alpha like you needs to know how to protect little omegas like myself and Eli, and your loyal betas too” Jim said in a small ‘innocent’ voice.  
“oh don’t even play that card OMEGA. You could kick Draal’s ass easy! You don’t count as ‘a little omega like Eli’”  
“eh, that’s fair”

THUMP THUMP THUMP the noises were louder and closer. Suddenly out of the corner Draal roared out and swung his chainsaw, making sure it was at full speed. Everyone jumped and screamed, within that split second however Jim had summoned his blade and armor and swung it at Draal, slicing some pieces of his Costume off  
“DRAAL. DON’T. DO. THAT” the group yelled as they breathed heavily.  
“HAHAHAAHAHAHAH! Hey! You damaged my costume”  
“YOU ALMOST GAVE US HEART ATTACKS” Jim ‘powered down’ his amulet and groaned  
“i almost killed you!”  
“almost, you could not, your attack hardly scrapped me anyways” Claire groaned loudly  
“THAT WAS ALL YOU?!”  
“yes! Did I frighten you all?!”  
“YES.”  
“good! Happy holidays!”  
“Jim. Control your troll.”

behind them they heard loud high pitched screeching  
“haha very funny Draal.” Claire said looking at the troll with pure anger  
“wasn’t me”  
“Jim tell Draal to knock it off”  
“I swear by my fathers name, that noise was not my doing” Jim put his amulet away and looked at the direction of the noise  
“Well, he’s serious when he says that. Maybe it was just someone else in here?” Eli suddenly gasped  
“MY STUFF! I AM NOT GETTING MY STUFF STOLEN OR DAMAGED!” Eli suddenly started to run off

“Well, everyone knows by horror movie standards, Eli is dead” Darci joked. Steve looked at her and scrunched his face up  
“not funny.” Shannon laughed  
“kinda is”

“on the bight side, virgins don’t die”  
“who said he was a virgin?”  
“eww Steve!”  
“what?! I’m just saying! Its not like I’m telling you about how I pound him against the wall and just abso-”  
“stop! I don’t want to hear it!” suddenly they all heard Eli scream.  
“NO, MY BOYFRIEND!” Steve shouted as he booked it down the hallway  
“and then there were two...” Jim sighed and shook his head  
“Time to go save the fellow gays”

 

as the group walked down the hallways they noticed that the building somehow was becoming more decrepit. The walls started to crumble, dust smothered the air, the sounds of groaning from the windows surrounded them like a chorus of SPOOP!  
“Hey! Gays! Where did you go?!” Claire yelled out. No reply other than the eerie ambient.  
“WE LOST OUR GAYS!” Shannon yelled  
“At least we still have two of them” Darci said. Jim couldn’t help but smile and laugh  
“Guess so, hear that Draal? We’re the last line of defense!”. Suddenly the smell of smoke and the sounds of sizzling filled the air.

“huh...Draal...you smell that too right?”  
“yes...”  
“you don’t think...”  
“By Deya’s grace I hope not...”

Darci whispered to Claire  
“who’s Deya?”  
“old trollhunter that’s like super famous or whatever”

The sounds and smells came and went, sometimes it would grow stronger, other times it would fade, sometimes until it was hardly anything. Then, the group looked out an old broken window and saw it. Jim grit his teeth.  
“antramonstrum”  
“how in my fathers name did that thing get here?!”

“uh...someone want to explain why there’s some giant storm cloud moving around” Claire asked  
“Long story short. Evil sentient cloud that literally disintegrates whatever it touches”  
“oh. Fun.”  
‘those things are ONLY in the Darklands….how did it get here?...oh no...Steve and Eli!”  
“are they dead?! Are we next?!”  
“shhh! Everyone keep quiet. There is literally NO WAY to kill these things. Only thing you can do is send them back to where they came from”  
“oh good. Even better.”

the group hid down as best as they could, they watched the killer cloud turn and swivel around, it moved erratically, seemingly confused. The group looked to Jim who was breathing heavily  
“Jim...you can like...kill this thing right? Or get rid of it?”  
“uh….maybe?”  
“maybe?!”  
“look I don’t always have the answer alright! Last time I encountered one was when I was in the darklands, long story, anyways all I did was hide until it went away. Toby said he used a fetch to put it back in the darklands”  
“please tell me you have this”  
“nope”  
“wonderful.”  
“i never-wait what’s it doing?”

The group looked as the creature suddenly stopped, then swirled and spun fast until it was similar to a mini tornado. The group slowed down their breathing as much as they could. Darci and Shannon covered their mouths, Claire crept closer to Jim, Draal tried his best to crouch and move so he could be harder to see. Jim peered out the window and continued to watch the strange actions being made.  
“it looks…..lost”  
“so, what should we do Jim?”  
“I’m thinking….Eli and Steve can’t be dead…..they didn’t run into it….we would have seen bones…..they did scream though...”  
“Well at least they might not be dead...that’s a good sign right?”  
“yeah…..”  
“can’t you amulet up and like, do something?”  
“if I do then it would make too much noise and light, then it would come here and kill us. Oh wait! Toby said one lived in a crystal thing.”  
“okay, I thought they lived in the darklands”  
“they do, Walt had one in his office at one point” Darci and Shannon gasped out  
“what?!”  
“another long story…..okay, this thing is coming closer, alright everyone, move slowly further down, try to sneak under the window” 

 

the group slowly crept down the hall, avoiding the windows as best as they could. The group was worried that Draal’s size might give them away, thankfully it didn’t.  
“Jim….Jim….Jim!” whisper shouts could be heard.  
“our gay boys! you’re alive!”  
“yeah! what’s the freak thing?!”  
“death cloud. Avoid it, or die.”  
“cool...fun….see Steve, this is exactly why I just wanted to stay home and cuddle, but nooooo we had to go out and die...at least we’ll be with our friends.” 

Darci and Shannon groaned  
“we should have just took off with Mary to the party...” Jim stifled a laugh  
“and miss this fun?”  
“you do this on a regular basis!?”  
“sorta….now a days my biggest worries are Gnomes learning about communism”  
“...I’m sorry what? Can you repeat that”  
“long-”  
“long story, got it. You know, you’re going to have to explain all this to us later”  
“i promise if we live I wi-” the antramonstrum suddenly passed over the windows, having them crack and chip before turning to dust. It then passed through the windows and into another room, one that held old desks and chairs. Steve did a dramatic roll past the door and then threw a rock out the window in the classroom, the antramonstrum followed the rock.  
“good call Steve” Eli said as he then tried his best to copy the roll, only to fall flat on his back, everyone was thankful of his small size, his body had barely made any noise because of it. The group crept past the class and then tried to walk as quickly and silently as they could. After a few hallways later they finally managed to breathe properly. Jim let out a sigh and rolled his shoulders  
“okay...okay what do we do….” Draal sniffed around and looked into a room nearby, across a hall was the ghost hunting gear they brought  
“i have an idea….”

…………………………………………..

The group had set up the gear, using it to try and track the antramonstrum with it, it worked surprisingly well. They all wanted to leave as soon as they could from the building, Jim told them he couldn’t leave while it was still around. It was far to dangerous to just let it wander about.  
“are you nuts?! Fine whatever, I’m out. I’m going to miss you, I promise to bring flowers to your funeral” Steve said with a wave, as he was about to walk away Eli spoke up  
“I’m staying”  
“babe...why? let’s leave! it’s not our job! You don’t get in a firefighters way when they need to put out a fire!”  
“Jim needs out help!” Darci took a deep breath then said  
“I want to stay and help” then Shannon agreed  
“me too” Jim smiled  
“thanks, but no. I need to deal with this” Claire huffed  
“uhhhhh same here!” Draal put a hand over his heart  
“I shall not leave your side my mate. We will die together”  
“okay...that’s sweet...but I don’t plan on dying.”  
“i meant...uh….never mind”

Claire flicked Jim’s ear  
“remember dummy, we’re trollhunters.”  
“okay okay fiiine. Draal Claire and I will stay and do our thing” Eli pouted this time  
“i want to help! You PROMISED me I was an honorary trollhunter! Remember? Super long ago?”  
“oh yeah...Eli let’s be honest. An eagle could pick you up. Do you reall-”  
“yes. I’m staying whether you like it or not. Either let me help you, or I do my own thing and hopefully not die”  
“...alright alright fine. Steve Darci and Shannon will leave” Steve made an angry ‘tch’  
“I am not leaving my boyfriend! Fine I’ll stay” Draal grunted out  
“can we PLEASE hurry up and get this done?!” 

“Claire, help Darci and Shannon walk out the building. Meet us here. I think I might know what to do.”

……………………………………………………………………..

So, there they were. The 5 of them looking around, going from floor to floor, room to room, avoiding the antramonstrum while searching. For what you ask? For it’s home. Jim explained that either there was a crystal it lived in nearby, OR a fetch, either way, they had to find it and put the dam thing back into it. It felt like it was a whole nights worth of hiding, sneaking, and searching, but they finally found what they were looking for. In a large room, covered in graffiti, was a broken chunk of crystal.

Steve walked over and picked the up the two chunks of crystal  
“what is that even doing here?” Eli noticed his gear going off  
“ask questions later. The thingy is coming towards us!” Jim Took the crystal from Steve and tried to put the two pieces back together  
“well. They fit. But they won’t stay together. Any ideas?”  
“it’s closer...” Draal took it and tried to press it together. It just shattered.  
“oops….”  
“DRAAL”  
“sorry...sorry...” now it was Claires turn. She quickly put together the parts, then ripped up some of her outfit and tied it tightly together  
“okay, it’s holding”  
“IT’S CLOSER”  
“Okay, here’s the plan. Get the thing back in here. I deal with it later.” Steve picked Eli up and ran out the room yelling as he ran past  
“sounds good! Do the thing!”

The antramonstrum was right in front of them, the group ran for it!. The creature sizzled and hissed, watching it’s home being carried off  
“okay! Time to yeet this fucker!” Jim yelled as he ran, he threw it behind him. Thankfully the antramonstrum stopped and went for it, only to swirl around then forget about it and follow the group  
“OH GREAT. GEE. HOW AWESOME” Steve yelled sarcastically  
“OH LIKE YOU WOULDN’T HAVE DONE THE SAME”. The antramonstrum was right behind them, Draal turned his chainsaw on and threw it at the cloud, only to instantly be destroyed. He gasped out  
“my chainsaw!” Jim rolled his eyes  
“what did you expect to happen when you threw it!?”  
“it would slow it down!” they turned a corner but, of course, Jim tripped and fell. He jumped up, only to have his shirt ripped off from getting snagged on a sharp edge in the floor  
“MY SHIRT!” Draal groaned  
“i was going to eat that! I mean...uh”

the group made a complete run around, they saw the crystal, laid perfectly on the floor. Jim did a dive roll and grabbed it, he yelled at the antramonstrum to ‘come get him’. Jim split off from the group, until he ran into a dead end.  
“well. Shit. Oh great trollhunters of the past, if you help me I will totally owe you! Please help me live! I haven’t even had a kid yet! I was looking forward to being a mom and live happily ever after with everyone!” Jim turned around and was blocked off by a wall of death cloud. It seemed agitated and moving closer.  
“hey there...fella...uh….so….hey...hi...names Jim...you wana go home? I want to also! Let me help you, please? Here, I have it! I promise I want to help!” Jim slowly squatted down and gently pushed the crystal forward. The antramonstrum slowed down.  
“see? I just wanted to help!”  
the only reply he got was a sizzle and more movement. Jim’s mind had a quick thought. He prayed that it would work….he quickly unraveled the cloth, hoping it would stay together. Thankfully it did. The antramonstrum noticed it’s home back to ‘normal’ it started to poke at it, then started to go back into it. Little by little the cloud vanished. Until it finally was gone. Jim crept over slowly then gently tied the crystal back together. It was over. He sighed heavily and promised himself that next year, he wouldn’t go ghost hunting. Then again, he did technically protect everyone by getting rid of the terrible nightmare fog.

“that was amazing!” Jim looked up to see Eli clapping giddily  
“We saw the whole thing!...sorta….well the end when it cleared up...”  
“thanks. I guess when your home is broken and messed with, you’d be angry about it. Well it seems to be staying put...still….dam I’m tired. I’m going to give this to Blinky. let’s go home. Next time, let’s just watch scary movies about ghost hunting.” everyone else agreed….

And so, on there way back, Jim quickly explained what had happened, He gave the crystal carefully to Blinky who said he would properly dispose of it. Then the group headed over to Toby’s house.

……………………………………………….

Toby finished listening to everything. He made a ‘wiping his brow’ motion.  
“wow. Well I’m glad I wasn’t there. No way I could outrun that thing” Jim closed his eyes and said with a tired voice  
“yeah….can we just like...eat candy and pass out?” 

 

……………………………………………………………………..

And so, the story is finished and the spooks have been spooped. Our little group had their fill of the night and could happily wait until next year. They felt like they needed another holiday. Something easy.

 

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!


	7. ....Draal the cat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a good day? go out and kill for your husband. impress dear old mom (and 'dad') with the trophies you bring home. almost die. then have WHO SHOW UP?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this chapter is small! I was running out of time for doing something important, i was already halfway through when it came up, anyways here it is! hope you love it!, i guess this would be part 2? well anyways
> 
> WHO IS SHE?!

Draal woke up, grunting slightly as the sunlight started to peer through the window. He shifted around a bit, looking down at his sleeping mate, making sure not to wake him. Draal was the type to wake up early and get stuff done, so he almost always was the first one up around the house. Draal gently moved Jim off of him and quietly left the room to go clean himself and start his morning. He had been taught, not without being stubborn about it, to have a more ‘hygienic sense of self’ by the three others in the home. Due to them actually being able to get sick from germs (something they had to explain to him) he needed to be responsible enough to clean properly, including himself. Since trolls lacked ‘hygienic tendencies’ Draal had to make sure he picked up those habits quickly.  
“these tiny life forms kill humans?! that’s how you keep getting ill and dying!? I thought it was random!”

He remembered the first time Jim showed him.

……………………………………….

“see? Just brush like this and floss, that’s it.”  
“how does scrubbing your teeth prevent you from dying?”  
“lot’s of ways. Talk to Toby, he could explain oral stuff more than I can”  
“and I have to do this more than once?!”  
“twice a day and floss once a day”  
“humans spend too much time cleaning themselves.”  
“keeps us safe!”  
“Bleh. Fine. I will try it for you….and the others too of course! Not JUST for you. I mean...never mind.”

Jim placed a hand on Draal’s arm and smiled softly. The look, the contact, that made Draal’s heart flutter a bit. Draal mentally forced himself to stop any kind of thoughts or feelings before they could become more dangerous to him…

“-and this of course is washing up. I’m more than sure you know how to actually clean yourself. Just do this at least once, and make sure to wash your hands as often as you can” Draal focused again, realizing Jim was talking again. He felt a twinge of anger at himself for not paying attention to Jim.  
“yes...ah...of course. Yes, I was very much listening.”  
“oookay, well anyways, yeah that’s all the stuff. You don’t have hair so you don’t need to use shampoo or conditioners, me though? I go through a bottle a week, honestly, and conditioner even faster! Troll fur really is so thick and hard. I keep getting knots all in me, it hurts to try and get them out”

Draal swallowed, trying to not imagine those words more ‘dirtier’ meanings. Thick...and hard knots...getting stuck into….

“perhaps we could change the subject...” Draal said in a nervous awkward feeling tone.  
“yeah this stuff is pretty dull. So well anyways go ahead and use everything.”  
“perhaps I might be allowed to view you bathing….CLEANING yourself, in a general sense” Draal wanted to kick himself in his own gronk-nuks for saying it like that.  
“okay, well I’m not going to shower in front of you, sorry big guy haha!” Draal felt a twitch below…  
“sorry? uh...you did...not disappoint me...if that’s what you’re thinking”  
“relax, don’t be so serious, I was just joking, here let me show you how I brush my teeth. Simple.”

Draal watched the repetitive movements, trying to focus on the ‘lesson’ to be learned. He mostly just felt bored but...his eyes couldn’t help but look at his cute Jim was, the way his fur was so soft and freshly groomed….the cute eyes looking at the mirror….  
“-then that’s it” Draal didn’t pay attention at all, he just blinked when he realized Jim started to speak up after he just finished

“yes...thank you for the demonstration”  
“so you wana shower real fast? Hey, do you ever need help washing your back? How does that work?”  
“n-no! No need to assist me in my bathing” Draal couldn’t help but have his mind start to form the images of the two in the bluff while Jim guides his hands all over Draal’s body, and the other way around, Feeling the smooth and soft texture of Jim’s trollish form.  
“well, go ahead and try everything you want, I’ll be in my room if you need anything” Draal nodded and watched Jim leave. The second the door closed Draal sighed in disappointment. It was targeted at himself for two reasons, the first was for having those thoughts start to sprout up and bloom slowly, he tried to prevent those feelings he carried around inside of him to grow into anything more. The second reason was because he didn’t pay attention to his kindly given instructions.

Draal just grunted and got to work.  
The shower was nice, the hot water washing over himself, the soaps smelled to sweet for him to really enjoy. It tasted terrible too. He cleaned himself over then went on to brush and floss his teeth. The toothbrushes he was provided were far too tiny for his mouth, he worked with what he had though. It took a while but he finished in his own pace, he cleaned his mouth over, making sure to get every spot. He ate the rest of the toothpaste tube, he thought that was what you’re supposed to do. He was shocked to realize that consuming too much of the stuff actually hurt humans  
“you clean yourselves with toxins and risk loosing your lives?! I thought these things were supposed to keep you alive! Not potentially kill you!”  
“that’s pretty much all cleaning products”  
“fleshbags are too strange to understand...”

……………………………..

 

Draal went downstairs after he was finished and started to eat something for breakfast. Barbara was going around talking to herself under her breath, something she did frequently when she was drawing out plans for something.  
“do you require assistance?”  
“..hm...oh morning Draal, yes actually, think you could help me clean some stuff out?”  
“it would be my pleasure” So Draal quickly finished what he was eating and began helping that morning…..

 

It was a bit later now, Jim had said his hellos and goodbyes before quickly leaving to trollmarket, Draal watched his mate walk away, he smiled and felt giddy inside. The reason? He had planned on doing the next step of his new courtship that day. His tribe had a custom of proving themselves to their mates family, typically by slaying the biggest and most dangerous creature nearby. This would show just how strong and ferocious they were, proving themselves worthy enough to be kept around, how well they could defend and provide for their new home, mate, and family.

Draal had finished moving some things around (along with eating some of what he was allowed to, hey it was easy, quick, all natural cleaning!) and afterwards he decided to start his own personal ‘quest. He left a note, in trollish, on the couch and left without saying a word….

……………………….  
about an hour later….

“oh no. ah Barbara dear, please come here for a moment” Walt said after he finished reading the note he found on the couch.  
“what’s wrong?”  
“well. Another step has just been taken. You might want to prepare.”  
“for what exactly? And what step?”  
“remember when I said Draal’s new ‘mating habits’ were going to start? Well they just did. First step for his tribe, he’s going to start bringing home trophies to impress you.”  
“that doesn’t sound so bad, Jim’s gotten some of those before when he was younger”  
“not the cute kind you give to others for doing a superb job. Its the ‘bringing home a kill’ kind of trophy and presenting it to you so you think highly of him and understand he can be a good provider as well as a protector.”

“he knows I already do though, so then Draal’s going to bring home like, deer and rabbits?”  
“if only it were that easy. No, hes going to start bringing home the things he considers to be the most dangerous.”  
“so...he’s just going to be bringing me ‘trophies’? What like a cat or something?”  
“that would be the most accurate comparison, yes.”  
“well there’s nothing dangerous around here, maybe he’ll move on?”  
“you and I both know Draal never just gives up and ‘moves on’. Besides, his tribe typically will go to the ends of the earth to find the most dangerous of game, and I’m not talking about man either.”  
“great, now we have to tell him not to bring dead things home”  
“i wouldn’t if I were you.”  
“why not? Pretty sure I don’t want him to be bringing home corpses of things he’s killed to earn my favor”

“he will assume you think little of him, causing him to hunt bigger game, an endless cycle really. He has to understand that you fully think of him as capable of being the strongest most worthy warrior to provide for Jim, along with you as well”  
“he already has my blessings and he knows that, plus didn’t he JUST have some huge fight to the death to prove he’s the strongest most worthy warrior?”  
“yes to all of that, but it’s just his people’s ways. If you want him to move on and stop, then you’ll just have to show you accept it, even if you don’t want it, or else it won’t...go….away….” Walt trailed off as he noticed Draal pulling something large towards the house.  
“where in the world did he find that, ah Barbara, don’t look outside” Walt looked out the window on the right side of the house

“whats wrong? OH DEAR LORD. WHAT IS THAT?!” Barbara covered her mouth as she saw Draal dragging a very young yet still large, nyarlagroth. A huge blue blood trail followed down a very long stretch. Clearly Draal had dragged the dam thing home for a while.

“nasty monster. Not anywhere around here. How he got it I have no idea and I think the both of us would be better off not knowing.”  
“i can’t have that that that THING near our house!”  
“well, you’d better tell him, politely, and remember, tell him you approve of it or else he will just keep bringing home more things. Worse things.”

Barbara walked out of the house, looking at the huge creature laying dead on its side. Draal looked at it with a wide smile of pure pride, truly admiring his work.  
“Draal...sweetie...uh...what’s this giant worm thing?”  
“ah! Ba bruh ah! I was just about to come fetch you.” Draal turned to look at her, then knelled down and gestured over to his ‘fine work’.  
“i have brought you this offering. May it please you. I hope the game is valuable to you.”  
“it’s...certainly...big…..and...bleeding...a lot….i think I’m gonna gag..ugh that thing smells horrible!”  
“human noses are so fragile. Wait...does...this not...please...you?”  
“no, I mean yes?”  
“forgive me...i should have known better than to bring this home….” Draal grunted sadly and lowered his head in shame.  
“no no! it’s...good...”  
“you do not have to lie to spare my feelings.”

“look Draal, I really really do accept you as Jim’s husband, I love you and I’m happy you’re with us, but this….is a bit...much for me. Humans don’t typically hunt down large….worm things...and bring them home. I guess I’m more of a woman with simple tastes. My point is, you don’t have to go kill something and bring it home to show me. you’re amazing as it is and I love you”

“i see. The trophy then isn’t worth your time. I shall dispose of the game.”  
“please get rid of it and thank you” 

Draal grunted and nodded with little emotion or effort. He grabbed the corpse and slowly little by little dragged it away. Barbara went back inside the house, to be greeted with an eyebrow raised Walt.  
“well, that could have gone better. I’m sure you don’t know, but you practically implied for him to fetch you a bigger monster.”  
“what? But I told him specifically not to!”  
“you admitted the ‘trophy’ wasn’t something you wanted. He thinks you want something different.”  
“great. Great, what should I do to tell him to just stop?”  
“hmmm, perhaps getting your point across will require more of a lovers voice. Why not contact Jim and see if he can talk some sense into the brute” Barbara nodded and grabbed her phone. She called a few times, but to no answer.  
“Maybe Claire might know where he is….”

………………………………..

Claire was picking up some of her baby brothers toys, tossing them into a toy chest next to Noten.  
“hey, we was gonna play with those!”  
“well someone needs to be cleaning up around here, besides look at this room, its a mess!”  
“well we were gonna play with all of them!”  
“why not just clean up what you already played with!”  
“great now you’re yellin at me. See, this is why I turn to the bottle” Noten gave fake whimpers and sniffles.  
“i do not cause you to drink!” in the other room Claire’s phone was heard going off.  
“I’ll be back. I except you to have at least made it to where people can walk through here.”  
“hey people can walk!”  
“you don’t count”  
“suddenly I’m not people?”  
“no.”  
“awww that hurts you know! Wheres me bottle to drown out these freshly made woes of mine”  
“you’re an alcoholic”  
“i can quit anytime I want! Besides, me liver is rock! I can’t ruin it, and drinkin is fun! You really should party with me more often, loosen up!”  
“you get way to wild.” Claire said as she left the room

“hello Dr.lake how is your day?…..no I haven’t heard from Jim all day, Draal’s doing what?! With what?!. Okay I’ll go talk to Blinky and Arrrg, maybe they might know what to do. I’ll tell you if anything comes up, goodbye” Claire sighed and turned around, she gasped at the sudden appearance of Noten right next to her  
“we need to get you a bell.”  
“i ain’t no cat or cow. Soooo what’s the big guy done now? Something juicy I hope!”  
“he’s apparently bringing home giant dead things to impress Jim’s mom.”  
“ahhhh classic monger love rituals, is there anything more romantic”  
“YES!”  
“well, someone doesn’t know a thing about troll love”

“whatever, I gotta go, clean up your messes and don’t make any more trouble”  
“HA! Like I’m stayin here when I can witness love at it’s finest”  
“you’re just trying to get out of this”  
“maybe...but I truly am a fan of true love and it’s projects”  
“what? You? I would not have figured you to be the type to be into romantic stuff”  
“of course! Do you really think me some emotionless party animal, a very handsome one, who just wants to eat socks and cause trouble?”  
“yeah pretty much”  
“well, some big sis you are”  
“just clean up, you can find us when you’re done”  
“ugh. Fine.”

with that, Claire used her shadow staff and decided to first teleport to Toby and see if he could lend a helping hand, she felt like they were going to need all the help they could get.

……………………………………..

Toby was too invested in his video game to notice Claire had come into his room.  
“Toby, Toby.” Claire decided to wack him on the head with her staff  
“OW! WHAT THE HECK! Awww I LOST MY HIGH SCORE! I’VE BEEN WORKING ON IT FOR THE LONGEST TIME!”  
“yeah I could tell. I need your help”…. Claire had explained the situation to him, the two had then called Blinky and Arrrg to come to them and help out. 

“I’ve brought two stones. The first, when broken, causes those around it to show extreme but true emotions, this will help to prove to Draal that Barbara truly means she respects and accepts him when he realizes that she has fallen under the influence of the effects. The second stone is a type of teleportation when activated, this will help be rid of whatever specimen Draal has decided to present.” Toby decided to play ‘grabby hands’ and take the emotion stone.  
“soooo cooool!” Arrrg gently took it away from Toby, making sure he wouldn’t drop it by accident.  
“we must be completely careful as we only have one of each. Now then, when Draal arrives with whatever he plans on bringing to his domicile, that’s when we will show him the stone then use it”

 

So the team did. They first told the plan to Walt and Barbara, then waited for Draal. As the day progressed, the 6 of them kept busy while keeping a lookout for where ever Draal may be, they tried to contact him (he has a phone, why? Cause writing it would be interesting down the line) however he never answered. Barbara had made coffee and offered it to everyone, everyone said no, except for Blinky. A mistake they now know of. Blinky had never tried espresso and thought it would be an interesting thing experience. He liked it a bit to much. The drinks usual effects of waking someone up and giving them plenty of energy, it seemed to have been even more intense for the troll. He started to drink more, then rambled on about things and spoke about various people who might conspire against him and how they would do it and in what way and at what time.

 

Then he started to make plans for future events, planning years in advance for every possible outcome he might live through, talking about the need for proper shelter and supplies to outlast the next million years (even if no one would ever even come close to living that long). They decided to cut him from the espresso, which he fought against of course. Arrrg then had to calm him down and convince him that he needed to quit while he was ahead.

It wasn’t until a couple hours later Draal returned with something chasing him.  
“what is that?!” Barbara gasped as she saw the troll rolling in his ball shape quickly dodging a very large crystal golem’s attempt to attack him. Draal took an opportunity to strike out when it arose, he swung his ax around and carved into the creature until he removed its ‘heart’ then he shattered it and picked up whatever remains of the creature he could get. A big armful of crystal chunks were brought to the home.  
“HAHA I HAVE ARRIVED! I present this offering! I understand how humans enjoy wearing decorative crystals, so I’ve brought you enough to wear an entire wardrobe of it!”  
“DraalwehavecometoprovetoyouthatyouhavenoneedtoproveyourselftoBarbaraanymoreasshehassomethingimportanttosaytoyou!” Blinky said so quickly that hardly anyone understood, especially not Draal.  
“what Gibberish do you speak of?” Barbara walked over and touched Draal’s arm  
“sweetie I accept your...offering and you have officially proven yourself to me, so no need to be doing that anymore”

“….” Draal is silent and couldn’t decide what he should feel, he heard the words yet his heart felt like it still needed to truly be proved.  
“look, we even have a stone...thingy that will prove it, right?” suddenly they felt the ground vibrate and they heard loud crashes echoing from the distant.  
“uh oh...uh….” Draal says looking out the window  
“what do you mean ‘oh uh’”  
“the golem was simply a small thing to gather resources from….i….may have brought forth a more dangerous creature to kill and prove my worth” the thumping was louder and they all ran outside. A giant shadowy troll creature hissed as it went towards the house. Blinky gasped as he took another sip of his drink.  
“BYDEYASGRACEWHATISTHATi’VENEVERSEENANYTHINGLIKEITBEFORE?!”  
The large creature hissed out, shadowy steam came out of its mouth and shot forward at them. Claire used her shadow staff to teleport everyone to safety.

“HOWDOWEGETRIDOFSOMETHINGSODANGEROUSANDLARGEANDPOWERFULANDWHYWOULDYOUCHALLENGESOMETHINGSOLARGEANDFIERCEIMEANIKNOWTHISISSOLIKEYOUBUTSTILLEVENTHISISRIDICULOUSWHATDOWEEVENDO!??!!?!?” Blinky slurped another cup in one go. Arrrg looked at his mate  
“stop drinking that!”  
“NEVERIHAVEN’TFELTTHISALIVEINCENTURIES!”  
“NO ONE UNDERSTAND YOU” the large creature turned to see Draal rolling into a ball and charging at him. Walt changed forms then picked Barbara up and flew her off to safety while the others tried to avoid the large creatures stomps and shadowy steam. The ‘emotions’ rock was knocked out of Arrrgs hand and shattered onto the ground around everyone. Arrrg looked down at the shattered remains with only a simple thought he spoke aloud.  
“uh oh….” a huge pulse of green energy enveloped the group. Everyone, including the shadow creature, paused and rubbed their faces. Suddenly Arrrg and Toby started to laugh hysterically  
“HAHAHAHAH WE’RE GONNA DIE BECAUSE OF DRAAL DOING THIS HAHAHAHAHAH” the two tried to run away as the shadowy creature regained its composure and shot steam at them while also swatting Draal away. 

A few moments earlier

“hey everyone guess who’s ‘ere! I finished me cleanin and wanted to see the romance!” Noten was driving his little car until he noticed the giant shadowy creature start to attack everyone. Noten swerved off the road and crashed into a tree trunk. He shook his head to clear it, then jumped out of his car as it was stomped on. Noten was blinded a bit as the green light enveloped him. He rubbed his eyes and became extremely angry  
“ME CAR! THAT WAS ME DOPE ASS PUSSY CRUSHER YOU SHADOWY FUCK!” He yelled out as he threw a small rock, only to have it harmlessly bounce off the monster. Back at the group Arrrg and Toby tried there best to do something useful but they collapsed onto Toby’s lawn and couldn’t stop laughing hysterically. Claire was horribly panicking, saying how she was going to die so young. Blinky got the idea to use the other stone they brought. He hurled it at the shadowy creature, only to have it be smacked out of the air at fly at the Lake house. The stone imploded and sucked half the house into its vortex.  
“OOOPSIDIDNTMEANFORTHATTOHAPPENIMSOSORRYIPROMISETOHELPFIXITLATER”

Through Toby’s fits of laughter he managed to shout for Claire to teleport the giant thing somewhere, ANYWHERE! So she did, she managed to use whatever might she had left to create a giant portal underneath the creature, it fell into it and was sent to who knows where. Claire yelled out she needed to follow it to make sure it would go someplace no one could get hurt, so she sent herself after it. Finally everything was silent except for all the dogs in the neighborhood to be barking, Toby and Arrrg’s laughter, the sounds of police sirens in the background coming closer, and Blinky’s ramblings. After everything was calm(ish) Walt flew Barbara back to their home. As the police drove up and got out of their cars, they started to question everyone for all the commotion. Draal suddenly started to horribly weep, Saying in trollish how he failed as a provider, a mate, a protector, and many other things.

Noten had ran up to the cops and flipped out on them, saying they didn’t come fast enough to stop the creature, which caused him to crash. He yelled at them that they would be the ones to pay for the damages done to his property. The police said they have no idea what he’s saying, Noten, in a fit of pure rage, jumped at one and started to attack. A couple other cops had to restrain Noten. For assaulting a police officer, they arrested him. Draal sat down, still weeping, as Barbara walked over to him and tried to comfort him. Walt pulled out his phone and called someone that would help ‘remedy’ the situation at hand.

“WHAT IN THE WORLD?!” Jim yelled as he had arrived.

…………………………………………………

 

“wow….i thought my day was exciting….” Jim said, trying to nudge Draal’s strong grip from his form.  
“okay, now your answers please, why do you have an ax? Why did you go to Canada?”  
“well, the ax is a gift for Draal”  
“I AM UNDESERVING FOR YOUR GIFT OF LOVE!”  
“...i went to Canada to get something for it”  
“YOU TRAVELED ACROSS THE WORLD JUST FOR MY GIFT, I DO NOT DESERVE YOUR LOVE!”  
“I also got to pet a moose”  
“I WISH I WOULD BE A BETTER MATE AND BRING YOU HOME EVERY MOOSE IN THE WORLD”

“please don’t do that, well...my day was a lot more simple...”

 

And so Jim told of his own day, then later that night the emotional stone’s effects wore off, finally letting the ones it affected go ‘free’. Speaking of free, Claire and her mother and father had to go down to the police department to take Noten out of the jail. Walt had made a few calls, which ended up helping the lake family find the other side of their home, which happened to have been sent across town, thankfully it just appeared within the woods, so no one was injured. They brought the house part back and fixed up their home that night. After all was said and done everyone went to bed and slept, letting the long, long, eventful day, fall into the past.

………………………………………….

it was about a month later now, the afternoon at the Lake home was a nice and peaceful one, the family was in the living room watching TV. Jim’s ear twitched as he heard a noise outside.  
“huh….did anyone else hear that?” suddenly the front door crashed inwards and was sent flying, crashing into the kitchen door, breaking them both into splintered shards. A large troll woman stepped into the home and looked around. Jim sat up from laying in Draal’s lap and yelled as he pulled out his amulet.  
“WHOA WHOA WHOA OKAY, FIRST UP, WHAT’S WITH THAT ENTRANCE?!?! YOU DON’T COME INTO SOMEONE’S HOME LIKE THAT! SECOND IF YOU’RE HERE TO FIGH-” the female troll smiled happily and interrupted Jim  
“ahhh there you are! I’ve been looking all over for you. After searching for so long, I finally located your home. Pity you love in a flimsy fleshbag home. Why are you not in a proper cave? Have you became to lazy to make one? I expected more from you son”

Draal sat up In absolute shock and said softly  
“mother” Jim Barbara and Walt looked just as shocked and yelled  
“MOTHER!?”

 

TO BE CONTINUED


	8. FAMILY REUNION! (uh oh)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Always a nice relief when your new relatives approve of you. ohh Ballustra, you're going to be a great edition!. everyone needs a big strong troll mother in their life!
> 
> I'm sorry about Kanjigar....
> 
> "A true monger doesn't cry......"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mama's here! everyone can relax, she hasn't killed anyone!....yet....she can't wait to see her old friends!, meet her son's mate, her new family, buuut then has to let it settle in that Jim's the trollhunter.
> 
> meaning one thing...
> 
> Gonna hit you right in the feels, hard. or at least i tried to make it like that DX, well, no matter what, there is always a happy ending! (at least in this fan fiction!) 
> 
> also noten cries to ABBA

Ballustra smiled as Draal rammed horns together with her  
“mother! What are you doing here?!” Draal laughed out happily  
“i heard my whelp was being mated. First I thought it was a rumor. Then I hear that my whelp was mating the trollhunter. Last time I remember, it was your father….which meant...well, it does not matter right now. So, where is your mate? I must see this new trollhunter” Jim walked over, putting his amulet away and making a small wave  
“uh, hi, I’m Jim a-” Ballustra suddenly grabbed Jim and looked him over  
“so you’re the new trollhunter? Small even for an omega. Hardly any weight on you! HAHA! Going to have to fatten you up! Put meat on those bones! My son always did love smaller things, I suppose you like em big then huh? I’m shocked that the amulet chose an omega! Well I’ve witnessed stranger things. I’ve heard rumors about a hybrid. I doubted it ever existed. Now I see it with my own eyes. My my, you are a pretty little thing, if not strange” 

“uh...thank you? I’m sorry about Kanjigar-AHH” Ballustra started to pull up Jim’s shirt and pull his pants down a bit  
“Nice carvings, good accuracy, nicely made lines….where is your fertility carving? What kind of omega does not get one? Are you at least pregnant?” Draal spoke up with a somewhat nervous tone in reply to her  
“Jim is...not”  
“poor thing, infertile?”  
“no. he has requested it to wait..”  
“hmpf. What omega puts off having a child?!. I suppose I can overlook it since you are a trollhunter and it is your duty to be able bodied at all time. We shall return to that subject, but first-” Ballustra set Jim down and patted his head lovingly, Then punched Draal directly in the face, hard. He fell to the floor with a heavy thump, causing some things nearby to shake.  
“how DARE YOU HAVE A COURTING EVENT AND NOT INVITE ME, OR EVEN TELL ME YOU HAVE A MATE!. What kind of child does that? Going off and courting without allowing me the right to watch my whelp fight to the death for his true love. I raised you better than that! When your father fought for me, I made sure everyone in my life was there to attend it, to witness that important day. Yet you deny your own MOTHER?!. Second, you NEVER SPOKE TO ME ABOUT YOUR FATHERS….mantle being...passed on. You think I shouldn’t have known? How long has it been since then hm? You think I shouldn’t mourn?”

“no! I...forgive me mother I….I shouldn’t have done that. I was afraid….I did not wish to upset you.”  
“oh, that is far too late to prevent now. YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME THE DAY IT HAPPENED. You hurt me my son. Well. I suppose I shall go out and mourn later. For now, I wish to celebrate! Now then, where is this omegas mother?” Barbara got up off the couch and walked over with a hand out

“I’m right here, uh hello, I’m Barbara lake it’s nice to mee-” Ballustra picked Barbara up and inspected her just as much as she did Jim.  
“you? You are this omegas mother? HAHAH! SOME JOKE!...not a joke? TRULY?! Hmm. I suppose not. Look at you! you’re all skin and bones! it’s no wonder the poor thing is so small! How can he even live with such a small frame?! I could break you with a simple twitch of my finger! Do you starve him!?. Fear not! I shall teach you how to properly cook.”  
“uh actually...Jim is the...one to cook, please put me down, you’re starting to hurt me” Ballustra laughed at hearing Barbara’s small complaint.  
“weak and small fleshbag” she said, putting Barbara down and patting her on the head. Walt felt it was his time to introduce himself  
“hello I-”  
“AN IMPURE?! WHY HAS THIS THING NOT BEEN KILLED YET?! Oh, a welcoming gift? I didn’t think you expected me” Ballustra pulled an ax out that was strapped to her hip. Jim was helping Draal up off the floor when Draal started to hold an arm out to stop his mother from charging.  
“NONONO! This is Walt! he’s the fleshbags- the bar bruh ah’s mate” Walt adjusted his jacket with a look of peeve.  
“yes...please do not refer-”  
“WHAT KIND OF HUMOR IS THIS?! You live within this flimsy home. You have yet to construct a proper one. You have yet to impregnate your mate. Your mate’s mother is a fleshbag. she’s mated to...an impure….explain this mess to me this instant child!.”

………………………………………………………………

Ballustra sat on the floor (after breaking a chair in an attempt to sit on it) listening to the ‘whole story’. From day one of Jim getting the mantle of trollhunter, to that very moment. She listened carefully with intense focus, memorizing every detail, making no noise. Finally they finished speaking to her. She had no reaction...then she closed her eyes and breathed. Then….she started to giggle, then transitioned into her bursting into loud laughter. She smashed her hand against the floor while doing so, creating cracks to appear.  
“if I had not heard this from you, I would have never believed it!. My my, what an exciting adventure!. Well, I’m VERY UNHAPPY NO ONE SPOKE TO ME ABOUT ANY OF THIS. However, I am happy that I now know of it. Now, I shall rejoin my family once more. Now then, where is your forge?” Jim decided he should be the one to start talking since Barbara was still shocked about meeting Draal’s mother while Walt was most likely someone Ballustra did NOT want to speak to and Draal looked the most nervous he did in his life, like a child asking for permission for something they felt like they would never have had a yes to.  
“We don’t have one, no one really uses them anymore, except for certain jobs but, overall...”  
“hm. Very well. I shall simply build one. Now then, show me to my room”  
“uh...what?”  
“show me to my room” Ballustra said in an annoyed huff, having to repeat herself. She got up off the ground and walked around the home, pulling things off, eating things, breaking things too, making an absolute mess.  
“we don’t have a room for you”  
“bushigal. Now you deny me into your home? You truly aren’t a good omega” Draal cleared his throat and spoke up nervously

 

“mother Jim is an incredible omega...hes just...not-”  
“a monger. Something you should have mated. It is your choice however, not mine.”  
“mother...perhaps...you could stay within trollmarket?”  
“no. I shall live among my family once more. Now, what is up here?” Ballustra crunched the stairway underfoot as she walked up to the second floor. She looked in all the rooms as Jim followed close to her, trying to prevent any further damage done to the house.  
“ahhh, this must be your room. Yes, that does look like your nest. Well built, for a fleshbag’s style. Tell me child, do you breed with my son often?” Jim blushed and wasn’t sure how to reply  
“well? Speak up? He is a strong warrior, it is your duty to breed with him often, he needs the relief”  
“i...uh..”  
“what? Do not tell me you are embarrassed about it. Do you not find yourself a good enough lover?”  
“no..i mean yes...i...uh...hey so let’s go someplace else and talk, kinda cramped In here-”  
“yes. Pathetic home. My son should be making a home for you. Has he not offered it?”  
“he has tried to...make improvements around here...just-” Ballustra walked past Jim and back downstairs

“where do you store your arsenal?”  
“we don-” Draal perked up and quickly guided his mother down to the basement. She smiled then rubbed her hands together as she looked at Draal’s collection.  
“weak. Small. Weak. Poorly built. Who let THIS be made?!. Decent. Decent. Weak. Okay. Weak. Ohhh what beautiful thing this is” Ballustra picked up and examined the courting gift Jim had requested to be made.  
“that is Jim’s gift to me. He had it forged”  
“beautiful….why has he not let you impregnate him yet?...but he has gifted you this. I suppose that makes it even for the time being. Have you tried it?”  
“not yet”  
“why not?”  
“i just didn’t want to damage it”  
“HA! Any true gift could NEVER be damaged! Does he just not forge properly?”  
“no no, Vendel was the one to craft it”  
“VENDEL? THAT GOAT?! Oh I must see him!”  
“yes, soon we should go to trollmarket and visit him along with the others”  
“ahhh it would be nice to see old friends and faces.”

 

meanwhile upstairs…

Barbara tried to clean up the broken parts of whatever Ballustra had destroyed from around the house. Jim walked over and began to help  
“mom I’m sorry i-”  
“no no Jim this isn’t your fault….every ones shocked at this...new development. Well it’s nice to have met Draal’s mother...she seems….nice” Walt huffed out and said sarcastically  
“yes. I suppose having a more intense Draal around would be a nice change of pace” Jim started to pick up the pieces of wood that used to be the doors and said while doing so  
“between Draal and I, I’m sure we can get her to be...a bit...calmer….like how we managed to get Draal to be” Walt sighed as he started to assist in the cleanup efforts as well  
“Draal isn’t a very traditional monger. I doubt even you can sway her thinking”  
“well, there is always a chance”  
“perhaps. Well when you do manage to calm a monger down, it would be the first time in history. I just hope she will go someplace else to ‘mourn her loss’. We don’t need a high body count coming up in Arcadia.”

“so how exactly do mongers mourn?”  
“like everything else they do. Killing.” before they could finish their conversation, Ballustra and Draal came back from downstairs and interrupted them. She grabbed Jim and started to depart from the home  
“come little one, you and my son shall lead me to this new trollmarket I’ve heard of.”  
“okay, uh bye m-” Jim was suddenly tucked into Ballustra’s form as she rolled into a ball and left.

……………………………………………

the three had gone under the bridge, making quick time from the rolling (as well as crushing things and almost destroying cars along the way) then as soon as they stopped, Ballustra unrolled and let Jim go, who collapsed onto the ground and felt queasy  
“ugh….now….ugh….how do you...both do that...I’m gonna hurl...”  
“practice. Now then, open the doorway and lead me, I am eager to see my old friends” Jim gagged and tried to soothe his stomach while Draal was the one to open said doorway. Draal was concerned for his mates newfound illness, he gently picked Jim up and helped to gently carry him within his arms into trollmarket. Ballustra looked down upon the troll sanctuary  
“my my, good looking heartstone, looks like Vendel knows how to do it properly, I will walk around while you both fetch me the goat”  
“yes mother” 

……………………………………….

Vendel rested within the walls of the heartstone, sipping glug and reading a book. Jim and Draal had entered Vendel’s room and announced their presence.  
“Hey Vendel...do you have...anything to help my stomach? I feel like I’m gonna barf”  
“oh good, just go ahead and do it right on the floor. Here this will sooth your problem. Now, why have you come? It better be important, I was in the middle of a good story.” Jim was given a small gross tasting liquid from an old looking vial, he chugged it in one go and almost spat it out. Draal was worried about the news coming from him, secretly knowing that Vendel preferred hearing things from Jim, since he lessened his wrath unto the trollhunter.  
“My….uh...perhaps Jim could speak...”  
“me? Gee thanks Draal….so….do you remember Draal’s mom?” Vendel took another drink of his glug  
“how could I not?! I still have the scars from her last party she threw back in the old world. She was a fierce monger. Why? What brings her up?”  
“she sorta just ‘visited’ us in our home”  
“she’s here? HERE UPON THE SURFACE?” Vendel sighed  
“how many has she killed so far? Does she still celebrate your union? Wait no...she wasn’t here to witness it...oh no...shes gone into a fit of rage hasn’t she?”

Draal groaned and still felt ashamed he didn’t invite his own mother  
“no...she...hasn’t gone into a rage...although she...uh...Jim can finish the news”  
“true love by throwing me under the bus. Alright well, she wanted to visit trollmarket and-”  
“AND YOU LET HER IN HERE?! We have little time to work then, we must first start to put away all the most vulnerable belongings-”  
“she said she wanted to see you and said she wanted to see her old friends”  
“oh dear. I hope she doesn’t harm Blinkous.”  
“wait why would she?!”  
“i would worry more about his brother than him. Poor Arrrg must not be killed either-”  
“WHY WOULD SHE?!”

………………………………………….

Ballustra entered the glug hub, looking around and smiling at the sight. Her old friends, along with unfamiliar faces she was already planning on ‘rearranging’. She called out  
“where is my mug? Why is it not overflowing in my hand? Why haven’t I fought someone yet?” most everyone had gone silent, Blinky choked on his glug hearing her voice, not believing he would ever hear it again.  
“Ah! Blinkous! My how you’ve grown! HAHAHAHA! How is the young whelp doing!?” She padded over, not after grabbing the largest mug she passed and chugged it in two swallows.  
“B-Ballustra!? Is it you?”  
“do I look like some illusion?” Arrrg looked confused at seeing his mates feared reaction  
“who’s that?”  
“who am I? HA! How could you not mention your old friend! I should be asking who are you?” Blinky finally cleared himself and introduced Arrrg and Ballustra to one another.  
“now where did this mate of yours come from? I’m surprised you went for a kubera. Then again, you always had a want for the larger things” Blinky laughed awkwardly as Ballustra suddenly sat with them, then drank Arrrg’s and Blinky’s glug.  
“It’s been centuries! Where is your cowardly brother?” she laughed and ordered more glug. Arrrg looked concerned from the look on Blinky’s face then decided to speak for him  
“hes at home”  
“i have the need to hit him! And you for that matter! Haha! Now then, fight me Arrrg! You look like you can take a hit”  
“no want to fight”  
“come now! Everyone should be fighting! Has my son’s celebrations already come to a close? I have yet to even start my fill!”

Blinky DID want to catch up...just not in a place where others could be hurt….he had an idea that he would probably regret latter down the line.  
“before that, would you wish to visit Kanjigar?” Ballustra paused from her drink and eyed Blinky intensely. Blinky swallowed nervously and waited for her to start a regular monger mourning.  
“take me to him.”

…………………………………………………….

Jim, Draal, and Vendel followed the ‘trail’ that Ballustra made. Between the smashed objects and stands, to the trolls running past them in fear, to others hiding, and to others who started to complain to Vendel about the monger’s destruction. Vendel decided to stay behind and try to ‘put out the fires’, literally and metaphorically. He said he would meet with them at a later time. Draal and Jim understood and moved on. The two ended up seeing her at the heroes forge, standing in front of Kanjigar’s form. Something Arrrg and Blinky brought down so she could see him up close. The two walked over to Blinky and Arrrg who waited nervously for Ballustra to start her mourning. Ballustra put her horns against Kanjigars, closing her eyes and frowned. She looked like she was about to cry when suddenly she started to giggle.  
“you foolish whelp. You hadn’t given me one last time to break you in our old nest. …..How could you leave me without saying one final goodbye…..i hope you are given comfort in the void. I will take care of our family now.” 

She purred out then smiled, looking at her friends  
“your father always was to soft to upset me. I will miss him more than I had over the years. Well. Now I have other business to do” She turned to Jim with a wet twinkle in her eyes.  
“trollhunter. Fight me. Prove to me that my mate’s death wasn’t wasted. That you truly are worthy of your mantle. you’ve done much, but you have yet to prove it to me. Now, as your new mother, I demand you fight. Draw your weapon, I do not plan to hold back.”

……………………………………..

Jim was now In his armor with his sword drawn. He wasn’t sure what to make of his new ‘mother in law’ yet. Draal really did get everything from her. Jim really wasn’t sure if he should fight her or not. He knew the reckless abandon you had when emotionally unstable. She insisted, by hurling her ax at him and rolling quickly. Jim had heard a few stories from Kanjigar and Draal about her, she really was strong, violent, eager for blood. She had a large heart though, someone who truly loved the ones close to her, someone who was a true protector and was willing to gladly risk her live for them. Jim had fought plenty of times, Ballustra was one of the top 5 most dangerous. She was far faster, stronger, more skilled than Draal ever was. Jim was told she really gave no fucks and practically told Gunmar to fuck off when she faced him.  
“a monger does not let fear into their hearts. They command others fear. Use it against them. A true monger didn’t slow down or show mercy to anyone.” Jim remembered Kanjigar telling him that. Jim was slammed across the forge like he was shot out of a cannon from Ballustra’s pure force. The entire time she laughed and smiled, something that surprised everyone.  
“a true monger doesn’t cry. They rage. Or sulk at the very least” Jim heard those words in his head as he witnessed her showing those positive emotions, instead of the negative ones. Jim hardly had any time to make a plan as he was assaulted quickly and efficiently. Ballustra made jabs at him (both physically and mockingly) about how he was too soft, slow, weak. Even with Jim’s new abilities, he had a hard time keeping pace with her.

Jim finally started to memorize her pattern, he used it against her. It worked for a few minutes, until she started to fight with chaos instead of order, constantly changing up her attack strategy. After what felt like a painful, very very painful, eternity, Jim had managed to weaken her, exploiting her vulnerable spots, as he did to Draal. However she WAS smart enough to have mastered her own weaknesses.  
“a true monger knows themselves in and out. Turn their weakness into strength.” Jim now had knocked the Ballustra flat on the ground. Both warriors panted heavily from the intense battle. Ballustra used what air was in her needy lungs to wheeze out laughter. She back up and cracked her neck  
“you truly….do know how….to fight….I approve….”  
“thanks….you’re pretty okay yourself” THAT reply caused her to laugh even more  
“you like to talk huh? I approve. So, do you yield? Or must I finish you off”  
“i was….just about….to say the same”  
“oh you will...make a good son…..i yield.”

The trolls gasped out from hearing that. NO ONE has EVER heard her say those words before.  
“i hope my mate...appreciates you...”  
“he does...he’s given me his approval...”  
“smart troll. Always did prefer to think. A little scholar who never could last as long as I wanted. In every way.” She stretched herself all over, cracking her joints, then went to rest and recover. The three trolls silently gasped as they just watched her.  
“what’s wrong? The three of you look like you’ve seen a vision of the end of times”  
“you yielded...”  
“what did you expect? The little omega has a good bite in him, more than Kanjigar ever did. I hope he learns to break you Draal” 

Jim and Draal blushed from hearing that. Jim could practically hear Kanjigar’s voice in that moment  
“a true monger takes pride in how well they breed” Jim went to go rest up next to her  
“uh...thanks….i guess?” She took a few deep breaths  
“ah. That felt good. I believe I’ve had my fun. I feel the will to mourn leave me now. I have been sated.” the other trolls felt even more shocked somehow.  
“you NEVER are sated from fighting!”  
“well, this little one wore me out. I do resent him however, for not letting me kill Gunmar.” Jim laughed  
“i wish you were there”

“now then, I need more glug and to visit others. Where is your brother Blinky? I owe it to him to hit him a few times”

…………………………….

as they walked to Blinky, Arrrg’s, and Dic’s home, Ballustra stopped Jim. She put a hand on his shoulder  
“Jim. You have helped me. More than I could have myself. I feel relief. I can accept my mate’s passing truly. I no longer feel the pain of his loss. I will miss him always, but I no longer feel the dark void within me. I wanted you to know how thankful I am. I might have lost a mate, but I’ve gained a son. I can see why my mate approves of you, as do I.”  
“Thanks Ballustra, that does mean a lot to me, I’m glad I could help.” She nodded merrily.  
“you are now my family. I will lay down my life for you”  
“you really don’t have to”  
“no. I will no matter what.”  
“well that’s nice to know”  
“you are a monger now”  
“huh?”  
“you are not from any specific tribe. Thus I am claiming you as my little monger. You have the heart and skills for one. Maybe not enough hunger for blood, but I will make due and properly train you on how to be a TRUE omega. I expect a grandwhelp soon”  
“thanks, I appreciate the love, uh about that I just...i don’t feel ready for one..that’s why I’ve been putting it off”  
“hm...i see….well, you need more confidence in yourself. Something I will teach you. Now then, let us continue on. “  
“can’t wait to be taught...i guess” Ballustra smiled happily. She patted Jim on the head and continued on wards.

 

They stood at the entrance now, Ballustra made her way inside while Blinky pulled Jim aside.  
“i wanted to speak to you for a quick moment. I wanted to discuss the topic of….past mistakes. Dictatious and Arrrg’s. It would be wise not to bring them up or discuss them in any way. I fear their lives would be at risk if mentioned. Perhaps we could simply...lie? Or at the very least not say the full truth” Blinky spoke with pleading eyes.  
“of course, I promise I won’t say anything.” Blinky looked relived along with Arrrg. Draal on the other hand….  
“i will not lie to my mother.” Jim looked to Draal  
“please Draal”  
“no.”  
“Draal, think of it. We don’t need anymore fighting or heartache...plus she wouldn’t want them around us. Is isn’t fair to Blinky or me” Draal sighed, his thoughts conflicted.  
“i do not wish to upset you...but I do not like to lie, especially to my mother. I do not wish to hold secrets from her.”  
“sometimes lying is for the best….”  
“i...if...if she brings anything up. I promise on my honor, I will tell the truth. Perhaps not...every detail...but I will never speak a lie. If she delves further though...i will not speak. You must do that for me.”

Jim smiled and hugged him, Arrrg and Blinky followed into the gesture of affection. Draal’s mind set at ease, if only slightly. The four of them headed inside to See Ballustra talking to Dic.  
“hello you whelp. you’re looking terrible”  
“what? Who dares-wait….that couldn’t possibly...i heard you had died! From...er...sources in my past company….”  
“well whoever said that was mistaken. I am as strong now as I ever was. Come here, I missed you! A few hits for every year I haven’t seen you! As traditional monger greetings! Hahaha!”  
“n-no please! You wouldn’t hit an old blind troll now, would you?!”  
“yes. I would. And I am far older than you are whelp. You were hardly in your adolescence when my whelp was born. Look at you, how did you become blind In the first place? Accident with a flare? Hahah!”  
“...yes...”  
“HAHAHAHAHAH! I WAS MAKING A JOKE! What fool blinds themselves on a flare?!”  
“trust me...it wasn’t my idea….”  
“from scholar to tiny blind troll. Well, you always were tiny. I could break you over my knee! I missed this”  
“that makes one of us...”

“you always were a cowardly little thing”  
“you always were a simple minded creature”  
“oh? Well this simple mind is debating whether I should double my greeting efforts” Blinky cleared his throat and stepped in between Ballustra and his brother.  
“perhaps we should visit Vendel now that you’ve spoken to my dear brother!”  
“not until I hear of what he’s been up to all these years, your family has always been close to our family”  
“eventful BUT nothing of true importance to mention now why don’t we move on and see Vendel!”  
“you act like I shouldn’t find out? I know little of your mates past either”  
“at a different date that discussion shall be had, you haven’t even see the heartstone up close!”  
“very well. I will be informed later though, that’s a demand”

………………………………………….

“VENDEL! SON OF KILFRED, SON OF RUNDLE, did you miss me?” Ballustra strode into the heartstone with a booming confident voice, it echoed throughout the interior making it seem even more powerful.  
“ah. Ballustra. How good it is to see you.” Vendel said in a plain monotone voice.  
“oh? Just as plain as always. Your father and grandfather always had charisma, where did yours go?” Vendel couldn’t help but smirk at that, the two bumped horns with Vendel replying  
“drained. Do you have any idea how much I’ve had to do around here? Leading this market is never easy. Especially with those ones.” Vendel motioned with his head in the direction of Blinky, Arrrg, Draal, and Jim  
“along with the other two fleshbags”  
“other fleshbags? WELCOMED HERE?! This truly is a strange world. I miss the good old days when things were far more simple. Your family of goats always did master the art of complaint.” Vendel made a full smile as he walked behind his table, fetching something  
“well, you learn from the best. Experience always helps too.”  
“so, do you still bear my scars? That party sure was something, we should throw another!”  
“oh no! We will NOT be doing that. You and your whelp are the only mongers here. that’s already hard enough to deal with. This isn’t your tribes territory, we have no need for wanton destruction and mass fights”  
“boring as always Vendel” Vendel chuckled and looked towards the others  
“why don’t you leave us for the time being, let us catch up on all the centuries”

………………………………………………..

Claire was at home trying to study. Only her and Noten were currently occupying the home. Claire heard music blasting for the past few minutes. groaned and threw her pencil down, she got up and went downstairs shouting  
“WILL YOU TURN THAT DOWN! I CAN’T HEAR MYSELF THINK!”  
“WHAT?”  
“I SAID I CAN’T HEAR MYSELF THINK!”  
“WHAT?”  
“I SAID-” Noten turned the music that was blasting out from his speakers down  
“aww come on! Stop bein a book worm and spend time with me! I’m lonely!”  
“go hangout with someone! I need to study for this test or I’m screwed!”  
“come listen with me for 5 minutes!”  
“all you’re doing is blasting Desiigner panda!”  
“it’s a good song!”  
“don’t you have to be annoying somewhere else?”  
“not until 4”  
“then keep it down!”  
“ffiiinneeee. Hows about you let me help?”  
“what do you know about geography?”  
“lots! I’ve been around for centuries!”  
“in the darklands”  
“ouch. Pulling out the big guns.”

“look. How about I finish up, then we can-” Noten’s phone went off. His ringtone was BIG BOOTY HOES.  
“THAT’S your ringtone?”  
“uh duuuuh, what else would it be?”  
“ABBA”  
“whaaat, pfft”  
“you love them, I caught you singing into a hair brush when you were brushing your scruff”  
“no you did not…..no….. You know what I’m gonna own it. yeah they’re awesome! So what? They make me feel alive!”  
“i know. You were crying while singing Fernando”  
“HEY, THAT ALWAYS GETS ME EMOTIONAL!” Noten answered his phone. He got super excited from whoever was talking and then suddenly hung up. He quickly darted past Claire and started to gather things up.  
“MOVE!”  
“what’s suddenly got you all excited?”  
“I JUST GOT CONTACT FROM A FRIEND. THERE’S A GOD DAMMED MONGER DOWN IN TROLLMARKET!”  
“a what?”  
“A MONGER! They are like THE party trolls! And there’s one down in trollmarket right now! That can only mean one thing, PARTY!” 

 

“why is one troll type showing up suddenly a big deal?”  
“you kiddin! Havin one of them around means things get balls to the wall crazy!”  
“why’s that?”  
“well, it’s Draal’s tribe!”  
“oh good lord”  
“trust me, Draal is TAME compared to his brethren”  
“OH GOOD LORD”  
“shit’s gonna get crazy and I’m gonna be the DJ”  
“you just love to add fuel to every fire don’t you.”  
“you know it, someones gotta do it”  
“so who is it then?”  
“dunno, some big buff omega lady apparently. Kinda weird ones showin up though, they’re always stickin to their turf, first one here since Draal and his old man came”  
“how come more of them didn’t tag along during the whole ‘new world’ thing”  
“you kiddin? Kanjigar only left cause he wanted to be with his friends. Draal only came cause he wanted to be with his daddy. Other than that, they NEVER leave their homes, they love to fight whoever comes up to them. Pretty much the way they greet ya is throwin an ax at your head. If you survive, you’re worthy of talking to. Gunmar and his gang literally came up to them and THEN WERE DRIVIN BACK IN THE SAME 20 MINUTES!, this was waay back when too, when he had a much much MUCH bigger army than what you saw”

“Well, don’t they sound like a lovely group of friendly trolls” Noten snapped his fingers  
“nice right? shit’s gonna get crazy, heads gonna roll, fight’s gonna break out. I gotta get down there before shit gets lit tf up without me!”  
“have fun I guess, don’t come home drunk. Again.”  
“fiiiine. I promise I won’t. Don’t expect me not to come home at least buzzed though. You seen me headphones anywhere?”

………………………………………………….

Jim’s phone buzzed with a text message from Toby  
T: Heeyyy!

J: heyyy

T: whatcha up to? I’m bored, wana do something?

J: sure, cleaning up the house first. you’re never going to believe who showed up today

T: someone important?

J: yeah, someone who’s also a new addition to my family

T: a distant cousin twice removed or something?

J: nope. Less complicated than that

T: someone from Walt’s? Wait do changelings even have actual families?

J: huh...i...actually don’t know, I should ask him. Nope, guess again

 

T: wait, someone from Draal’s side?! DID KANJIGAR COME BACK FROM THE DEAD?! A ZOMBIE TROLL!?

J: that would be interesting. Far easier to deal with too. it’s his mom

T: HE HAS A MOM?!

J: everyone has a mom Toby

T: not me….not poor little orphan Toby D;

J: you’re not an orphan, and yeah, she is CRAZY. Like, imagine if Draal was like, twice as big, and like 100x as intense. She LITERALLY KICKED THE DOOR IN WHEN SHE CAME HERE

T: ohhhhhh that’s what that noise was?! I thought a bomb went off in my game. I got these new suuuper good headphones and it makes you feel like you’re right there! Anyways, man it was loud!

J: I know. I was right there

T: sooo tell me all about dear old troll mama!

J: when we hangout I will. Shes...interesting.

T: =O

J: ᕙ(˵ ಠ ਊ ಠ ˵)ᕗ

T: ʕ⊙ᴥ⊙ʔ

J: (⊙ᗜ⊙)

T: so does dear Draal mama have that sweet troll ･｡ﾟ[̲̅$̲̅(̲̅ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲̅)̲̅$̲̅]｡ﾟ.*

J: I don’t think they use that

T: ┌〳 ˵ •́ o •̀ ˵ 〵┐

J: ¯_(ツ)_/¯

T: 乁⁞ ◑ ͜ر ◑ ⁞ㄏ

J: alright enough memes, I gotta finish cleaning

T: want me to come help?”

J: that would be awesome of you, I’m getting kinda full and we’re out of garbage bags

T: so she likes to fight huh?

J: (งಠ_ಠ)ง I had to fight her today in the forge, not fun. I’m going to be bruised up for a while

T: ᕙ╏✖✖╏⊃-(===>

………………………………………………………………..

Claire sighed as she finally finished up her work. She tossed her work into her bag then tried to relax by checking up to see what her friends were up to. She had pictures sent from Noten, showing damage all around trollmarket with the captions  
‘monger crossing! Lol! Better gtf outta the way!’

She had other messages and pictures from everyone else, mostly a lot of selfies from Mary. She asked everyone if they wanted to meet up, everyone said they were busy or couldn’t, all except Jim and Toby who replied that they had big news and to come over asap. Claire took that as a sign to be able to get out of the house for a while.

She did her usual shadow staff teleport and arrived at the Lakes home to see it broken and damaged, slowly being repaired by the family and Toby.  
“what did Draal throw a tantrum?” Toby was sweeping up some dust and turned to her  
“no his mooom did!”  
“mom?”

………………………………………………………………………

Noten was in trollmarket going around, saying hi, stealing socks, and generally being an annoyance. He came to the Galadrigals cave.  
“ayyyeee Arrrg, you know about the ne-whooaaa” Noten stopped as he saw Ballustra who was currently being pushed away from a cowardly Dic trying to hide Behind Blinky  
“the mad troll is trying to assault me!”  
“I’m only trying to greet you!” she laughed before turning to look at the small creature next to her  
“what is that thing? Some mutant gnome?”  
“hey! I ain’t no gnome! Wow so you’re the monger...daaaam you’re big even for your kind, hey I know someone’s in the mood to party! let’s-” She tried to step on him, he barely had time to jump out of the way  
“filthy impure. Are they an infestation here as well?”  
“aye! Who you callin an infestation! I’ll have you know that I personally have the trollhunta as me friend! His BEST FRIEND” 

 

she stopped and stared at him, as if the words had a hard time being translated into her mind.  
“aye, why you lookin at me like that? I’m bein honest!”  
“a changeling? Honest?...” Blinky cleared his throat and spoke up in Noten’s defense.  
“he isn’t lying, it’s a long story, but erhm...yes, he is a friend to Jim, the two are quiet fond of one another”  
“yeah! See! We’re besties! I got him on speed dial! Jealous?” Ballustra looked back and forth, the gears in her mind shifting. Until she sighed and accepted it.  
“hm….maybe in this world anything really is possible.” Noten climbed up on her shoulder  
“now then, let me prove it to ya by throwing a bad ass party!”  
“no.”  
“….no?”  
“no”  
“but but but you’re a MONGER!”  
“And your point?”  
“MONGERS LOVE TO DRINK AND FIGHT!”  
“and kill. Those are true, but I wish to celebrate in a different way”  
“awwww…..wait who are you exactly? You look familiar...” Dic was about to mumble something, probably rude, until Blinky covered his mouth. then decided to continue being the peacekeeper by saying  
“this is Draals mother”  
“WHAT?! HES GOT A MUM?!”  
“everyone has a mother”  
“not poor orphan Noten. The poor small changeling none of the other changelings wanted to play with” Noten made fake whimpers and sniffles

…………………………………………………………………….

Claire, Toby, and Jim finished cleaning up together, they weren’t sure what to do so they decided to do something interesting and new that just happened In the town! New exhibits at the museum! Not very exciting, but that’s what they had to work with. So they did. The three left behind Draal, Walt, and Barbara in the home (them being a bit reluctant to have Jim leave, as Ballustra could come back anytime…) although Jim did have a small thing he was afraid of at the museum…..

The three paid their dues and entered, a fun half price day, woo!. They walked about and talked about their day so far while enjoying the new exhibits. Claire was glad she didn’t end up meeting Draal’s mother, although she wondered if Noten would get a kick from finding out who she was. Normura walked around, checking things and writing little notes on a clipboard. She smiled at them as she walked past, the three said hi but Jim felt awkward….he needed to talk. He told Claire and Toby he would be back in a few minutes and to go on without him.

“hey Ms.Nomura...got a sec?”  
“sure, how may I help you little gynt?”  
“i wanted to kinda talk real quick about...personal things”  
“you know I’m not an omega right?”  
“no not like that!”  
“i know, I’m joking. Are you referring to you and Draal?”  
“uh...how did...”  
“wasn’t hard to find out. Walter told me”  
“he did?”  
“of course, we are good friends, why wouldn’t he want to mention his son’s wedding”  
“I’m surprised he talked about it at all...son?”  
“he does care a lot about you and your mother. He does consider you a son, I’m surprised after all these years you still find that hard to believe”  
“no no, It’s not hard to believe...it’s just...i don’t know, like, weird to think about I guess?”  
“well don’t worry, there is nothing ‘awkward’ between us. I’m surprised you even brought it up”  
“well we see each other a decent amount, I just never wanted there to be awkwardness...” Nomura smiled at Jim, she was finding this a bit funny.  
“well, there won’t be, that was a long time ago”  
“hey...actually now that I think of it….you two were a thing...so why didn’t Draal do the whole ‘fight to the death’ for you? also you are both alphas...”

 

“we were never technically official, it was...unique for both of us. It was more like how a high school crush went. Nothing truly serious. Just flirting and, well other experiences you and I have probably shared-”  
“gross”  
“- anyways, he never spoke up about it. Not a problem for me, I never was the sappy type anyways. He doesn’t deserve you in my opinion”  
“Wait...why’s that?”  
“nothing against you, don’t think much into that. I just feel like you could have done better. I’m kidding! But him of all trolls? Or humans, or, anyone really. Thought you would be more interested in someone a bit softer, more romantic.”  
“well, he and I just have this bond. This Connection. Not really sure how to explain it. we’re just, really comfortable with one another, we trust each other fully and know each other well.”  
“that’s good to hear, you deserve to be happy, I hope you are treated right”  
“thanks, this actually takes a lot off my mind. Now when you come over for tea and visit I won’t have to feel like I’m trying to doge you….hey, there was one other thing. Did you ever meet his mom?”

“no, I never met either of his parents, I heard stories, and tried to kill Kanjigar of course, but never anything else, what brings her up?”  
“believe it or not but she’s here. Not here here, but in Arcadia.”  
“ohhhh? Well, hows the resemblance? I hear Draal takes a lot more after his mother” Jim ran a hand through his hair and laughed  
“you have no idea. She is like him but magnified. First thing she does? She comes to our house and LITERALLY kicks the door inwards, smashing it into the kitchen door. Then she meets us, then she decks Draal!. We took her to trollmarket to visit some others. Wow, everyone’s reactions to her. Priceless. Oh, then she fought me and almost killed me, wanting to see if I truly was a ‘worthy trollhunter’. She did it because she learned about...well, Kanjigar and his ‘passing on the mantle to me’. She wasn’t feeling good about that. Not that I’m the trollhunter, but that no one told her he died years ago. Apparently Draal never brought it up because he didn’t want to upset her, well us fighting ended up helping her emotionally. I’m happy to have helped my new mother in law.”

“she is a monger. When they’re upset, Well you know it from experience. Well, I give my regards I suppose. Sorry if I’m not more emotional about these sorts of things, but changelings don’t have families, so I never really know how to deal with these situations.”  
“it’s fine, thanks for talking to me”  
“anytime. Oh, here, it’s nothing but consider it a wedding gift” Nomura pulled out a few tickets from her clipboard.  
“here, a few free visiting passes for you.”  
“thanks, I appreciate it. Guess you can never get enough pottery and tapestries in your life”  
“well, you may not like it, but I do”  
“hey, maybe it would be a good date idea to bring Draal here”  
“I’m more than sure he would be about as interested in these things as he would a daisy” the two laughed together

“actually, the world should be thanking you. you’re doing everyone a favor. there’s finally someone willing to put up with him and keep him from going too wild. A burden no one else has to bear now”  
“Gee thanks, I love to hear how I’m helping the world by keeping Draal out of everyone’s hair, well thanks for the talk, I’m going to head back to my friends, nice seeing ya”  
“you too, see you around little gynt”

…………………………………………………….

The three friends went back to Jim’s home to hangout, after pursuing the museum and getting bored. They heard clanging in the backyard of Jim’s home, causing them to investigate. Ballustra was banging thick metal pieces together and folding them as if they were strings. She was crating some kind of large metal band, along with a much smaller one. She finished after a few more bangs and folds. She looked over her work and smiled, clearly proud of what she had made. She turned around to see Jim and his friends  
“ah, there you are my son. Who are these fleshbags?” Ballustra walked up to them, her very presence radiated intensity  
“this is Claire, this is Toby. This is Ballustra guys, Draal’s mom” Toby gasped and his mouth opened into a smile  
“wooooow you look so much like him! Or I mean the other way around, man you’re huge! you’re like, slightly bigger than Arrrg! Do you know him by the way?”  
“yes. My old friend Blinkous introduced me to his mate.”  
“you know Blinky?”  
“yes, I watched him grow up. His family always did have a tight bond with my own.”  
“wait YOU’RE OLDER THAN HE IS?!”  
“yes. He was next to me with his brother as my son hatched”  
“bLINKY IS OLDER THAN DRAAL?!” Ballustra cocked an eyebrow.  
“do fleshbags have a hard time learning? Or hearing?”

Claire laughed  
“no that’s just toby, it;s nice to meet you”  
“what is with this place?! All you fleshbags are so small! All except that one, at least HE has meat on his bones! Hahah! Does no one know how to eat around here? Or train? Back in my day the fleshbags we didn’t eat were strong hardy creatures who knew how to put up a fight. Those were the days”  
“trust me. I know how to fight” Ballustra started to cackle  
“what?! You?!”  
“want to fight and find out?”  
“ohhhhhh any other day I would have easily snapped you in half for amusement. Not this day. This day is more important than myself.” Ballustra turned around and handed Jim one of the bands  
“here. A gift for you, a matching band for my son as well. I don’t have any real materials to work with. I took apart that strange wheeled chariot to forge this”  
“MY MOMS CAR?!”  
“a car? What happened to regular horse drawn chariots? Those were so fun to watch crash! Oh the days when fleshbags would fight to the death for sport! Like watching two small cute animals fight over a scrap of food. So cute and amusing”  
“okay but, MY MOMS CAR?! She needs that to get to work!”  
“what occupation does she have? She clearly can’t be someone who forges things”  
“shes a doctor”  
“really? I forgot human’s needed medical assistance to survive. Do you still pour molten tar upon your wounds to seal them shut?”  
“no, we’ve come a looong way from that. Thanks for the gift though, I really love it”

the two matching bands had monger love symbols etched into them, along with various types of crystals.  
“Good. Next thing I plan on doing is giving my son a TRUE arm. Whoever built that little childs toy clearly couldn’t tell their metals and joints apart. Sloppy sloppy work. I’m surprised my son can even use it!” Toby thought for a moment then spoke up  
“wait didn’t Blinky make it?” (THAT’S CANNON!)  
“HAHAHAHAHAH NO WONDER! I didn’t even know he COULD pick up a hammer! Such a small thing”

Ballustra sniffed around and walked past Claire and Toby(who had to quickly get out of her way) and headed into the kitchen. Barbara had started to cook! To Walt and Jim’s horror. Draal was excited though.  
“something smells surprisingly well”  
“ahh mother! Come and enjoy the bar bruh ah’s cooking! it’s almost as good as yours!”  
Toby gagged quietly and whispered  
“what kind of horrors does that troll lady cook if it’s ‘better’ than your mom’s!?” Ballustra pushed Barbara aside, picked up the entire pot, and ate it in one bite.  
“hmmm….not bad. I will teach you how to cook a REAL meal though. Something to give you all some weight.”  
“well, thats...kind of you to offer Ballustra. Jim Is the one teaching me right now though, don’t think I would have the time to fit it in”  
“you’re right, fleshbag lives are far to little to truly master anything”  
“actually. I am a doctor. I have my masters degree in medicine”  
“oh? Well congratulations then! Fleshbags always do know how to act so quickly in such a short time”

Jim ‘kindly’ pushed Ballustra out of the kitchen  
“speaking of cooking, I’m going to be taking over so you and my mom can go relax”. Jim came back into the kitchen and began to prep. He looked to his friends  
“do you two want to stay?” Claire and Toby looked to one another, Toby said quietly  
“i kinda want to...just to see how this plays out, but I’m also afraid to see how this plays out”  
“Jim do you need support?”  
“honestly, I think I got it, or can at least keep everything from going horribly”

 

Well. The evening was, interesting. The friends decided to stay and give support. Help steer conversations away from ‘when Draal was a whelp he killed and ate his first human’ to more of ‘so the sunset was nice’. Ballustra watched Jim cook, then went to reminiscing about the past, then back to watching Jim. Draal was a MASTER at etiquette compared to his mother. Ballustra was loud, messy, unruly, and overall...a monger. Draal was out of his mind happy to hear about his mothers gift to Jim and him, he swore he would always keep it close. He was also excited for his new arm. Similar to how a child would be when they heard they were getting a pet. It was night now, dinner was finished and cleaned up, Toby and Claire went home, and the time to try and get Ballustra to leave was happening in that very moment. To everyone’s relief, she told them she would move down to trollmarket for the time being. She had worked it out with Vendel. She said her goodbyes and told them she expected to be with them a lot more. Draal as ecstatic, the others….not so much. Before she left, she had a private conversation with Draal outside. Then she did the same with Jim. She spoke about how she’s excited to be in his life, to get ready for her love and gifts, and to show she could be kept close to the heart. She truly wanted to love her new family, even if she was rough. She said her goodbyes then left to trollmarket.

……………………………………….

Jim was laying with Draal in their nest. He was quietly talking about Ballustra. He was nervous about her, mostly how she would ‘interact’ with his life. Draal assured him, once she got used to everyone, she would ease up. She just wasn’t sure how to ‘interact’ with everyone. Draal told her she’s been alone, more or less, for all these years. He regrets not visiting her. Or at least sending some kind of mail. He felt like it was his duty to patch up his relationship with her, and he needed Jims help. Draal also said his mother spoke highly of Jim, saying she couldn’t wait to find out more about him. Jim was happy that she loved him, nothing eases up someone by knowing their new relatives accepted them.

The two fell asleep in each others embrace.

Life wasn’t going to get any easier. 

It would get Far more chaotic too

well, nothing new to them, that’s how they loved it

At least it would be fun and unpredictable!

Who wants a predictable boring dull life?


	9. Dumb at the mall, introductions for Draal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim needs a break. what better way that to be dumb with your friends! mall style! not only that, but it's time to finally introduce your husband to your friends.
> 
> Steve don't be like that, no need to be jealous of Draal.
> 
> you clearly are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cut this from a chapter I'm working on, so it wouldn't be too big, anyways enjoy!

Jim was knocked off his feet and he fell onto his back. He was currently sparing with Kanjigar in the void that morning. Kanjigar smiled at his ‘son’ and chuckled out  
“So, what do you think of Ballustra?”  
“shes strong….”  
“you have no idea.”  
“i don’t think I want to.” Kanjigar offered a hand and helped pull Jim up off the floor  
“ah, she hasn’t changed a bit since we were together, tell her I still love her immensely, and to not control every aspect of your lives. You must stand up to her! She wants the challenge!”  
“yeah. that’s what I’m afraid of”  
“you did best her in battle, just barely, something very few have ever done. Not even I was aever able to do it. Quite the feat if you ask me”  
“thanks, gotta say I wouldn’t want to be on her bad side”  
“oh I know that side well enough. She has a lot of patience and understanding, but her anger is only rivaled by how strong she is, as well as her sexual prowess”  
“okay I don’t need to know about that”  
“i fear she may be telling our son how to ‘properly’ mate like a true monger”  
“OKAY, WELL THEN”

 

“she approves of you greatly. She does not pass her approval out lightly, it takes a lot to earn it. She might seem very rough and tumble, which she is, but she has so much love to give. Never let her feel alone…..i…..i feel ashamed for what I did...”  
“what did you do?”  
“i left her. Well, I left to cross over to the new world, that was the last time I spoke to her. I shouldn’t have gone that long without at least sending some kind of message.”  
“there was a lot going on, you spent your time just trying to find the heartstone, dealing with becoming the trollhunter, keeping everyone in check from eating people, then the war you had to fight. Not an easy thing to do” Kanjigar looked to the ground in shame  
“after all that. I should have sent some kind of word to her. Anything would have been better than nothing. I feared I was a failure. That she shouldn’t see me”  
“what?! She wouldn’t think of you like that!” Kanjigar sighed heavily from the painful memories washing up.  
“i lost myself at the bottom of a glug mug. For a very long time.”  
“you...were a depressed alcoholic?” (it’s cannon! it’s in the book the felled)  
“in a way...i just….felt like I couldn’t help everyone.”  
“no one is perfect at everything though, there’s only so much any one person...troll...whatever, can do” Kanjigar chuckled and looked at Jim

“you are smart. If my mate had seen me. She would have knocked me to the floor, then she would pick me up and tell me to stop feeling sorry for myself. “Monger up and tough it out”. She strongly believes that throwing little pity parties are a waste of time and energy. I wish she were there to beat the confidence back into me. No matter what, she always could bring confidence back into anyone.”  
“i hope she doesn’t plan on kicking the crap out of me if I ever feel that way”  
“oh trust me, she will. However you are...different. She most likely won’t treat you the same as she would other trolls”  
“like my usual being different, or something new”  
“a bit of both. Shes testing your waters right now. See what your breaking point is, how soft she needs to be, how hard. She tests others limits to get a feel on how she should help them. She may not seem like it, but her main focus is to always care for the ones she loves. Her loyalty and love are both equally unquestionable and she will stand by your side no matter what, as long as it isn’t something bad to yourself or others. She has a strong voice and will say her opinion, only out of love though.”  
“well I guess I am looking forward to her being in my life”  
“you should, she is an amazing woman”  
“honestly, I think I’m mostly afraid of her accidentally breaking my mom, or teaching Draal bad habits” Kanjigar laughed happily  
“HAHA! Both of those she will most likely happen. Believe it or not, but I was more of the scholarly type. (CANNON! in the book the way of the wizard)  
I was passive, she wasn’t. when I wanted to run, she wanted to stay and fight. She always takes charge and be the strongest she needs to be. She truly was amazing to watch. Although, her sheer willpower was always the death of me, when she went into heat ooohhh I feared for my life, she would always take charge and break me in ways I didn’t think possible. Her appetite-”  
“oookay I don’t think I need to hear about anything...”  
“suit yourself. Hmmmm….my son might be getting advice from her at all times now. it’s only natural for a son to ask for advice from his mother, especially mongers. We do not seek aid lightly, and when we do it’s only ever to our own kind. If his manner changes into a more ‘aggressive monger’, fight the sense back into him. Challenge Ballustra as well, trust me, she will approve of it, unless she doesn’t”

“good to know”  
“if she takes something too far, tell her, usually in a strong but loving way. She will stop and understand. She wants only the best for the ones she loves, she helps ‘guide’ them towards whatever she thinks it might better your lives. Speaking of, has she tried to push our son into doing anything...drastic?”  
“not...that I know of, why? What do you mean by drastic?”  
“you truly must be taught courting, sooner than later preferably. When an alpha claims an omega, no matter what tribe, the alpha will always create a perfect home for the two of them. Ballustra helped to teach any who wanted to learn it”  
“yeah but we already have a home”  
“which is what I’m afraid of”  
“meaning?”  
“Troll alphas create homes. Existing ones they alter.”  
“oh no...”

………………………………………………………………..

Jim needed a break. Some time away from trolls and trollhunting and everything supernatural (give or take). So what better way to relax than being dumb at a mall with your friends!

So there they were. The gang having a fun time together. 

Currently the group sat in a food court eating together. A bit away was Steve and Eli kissing and taking pictures in front of a water fountain. Toby was looking at them and eating ice cream. He turned to everyone else. (so to make this easier to write, I’m just going to use everyone’s first initial in place of their names when there’s lots of talking.)  
T=toby  
S=steve  
SH=shannon  
D=darci  
M=mary  
E=eli  
C=claire  
J=jim

 

T. “guys. Whenever I see them I can only ever see that one picture of the hamster eating the banana”  
M. “Toby!…..oh my god I see it..”  
T. “RIGHT?!”  
SH. “what picture? Why would it be so bad?” M cackles and shows SH.  
SH. “whhyy would you say this?!”  
J. “something so true yet brave enough to say it out aloud” Steve and Eli came back over to sit with everyone  
S. “So what are we talking about?”  
M. “gay stuff”  
S. “cool” Jim pulled out a can of pineapple (a friend and I have this joke where it’s his favorite thing and he eats them like starbursts) and started to eat it.  
E. “are we sure you’re not half goat instead of half troll?” Jim just shrugged. Some kids ninja ran past them. After Jim swallowed he laughed  
J. “reminds me of middle school, huh Toby?”  
T. “haha yeah anyways”  
D. “why middle school?”  
J. “well-”  
T. “HAHA NOPE. ANYWAYS-”  
M. “i must know!”  
SH. “everyone’s awkward in middle school”  
J. “Toby went through this whole ninja phase-”  
T. “HAHAHA ANYWAYS HEY, REMEMBER WHEN JIM WAS A HUMAN?”  
C. “nice subject change. Ohh yeah, weird to think that now, that’s not mean right?”  
J. “naahhh sometimes I forget too. Like, sometimes I might see an old photo and I’m like  
‘who’s that person next to my mom OH THAT’S ME!’”  
D. “speaking of Jim, I just realized. Would he technically be considered and endangered species? he’s the only one of his kind” the group went silent in thought.  
J. “should I get a certificate for that?” 

 

T. “i think it would be pretty cool if I where a hybrid”  
C. “you want to be one?”  
T. “it would be cool! Do all the things Jim could do”  
J. “trust me, it’s NOT easy. Mood swings, super intense cravings at times, getting feral and wanting to attack everything at times, the shedding, the thickness in your fur that huurts when you try to get the knots out, I go through like, a bottle of conditioner a week! Trying to find cloths that fit, making sure you don’t eat things by accident. I can’t tell you how many pillows I’ve eaten in my sleep”  
T. “well yeah but a lot of that stuff is because of your omega nature, I’m sure it would be a lot less intense for me”  
E. “if...anyone wanted to know...i like anime too”  
M. “nneerrrd”  
D. “otaku”  
SH. “what’s your favorite kind?”  
E. “I LOVE WAAY OVER THE TOP GIANT ROBOT FIGHTS AND LASERS AND GIANT SWORDS AND-”  
S. “shhhh calm down! everyone’s looking at you weirdly now”  
C. “oh who cares, everyone else is lame”  
M. “heeyy speaking of things that are lame, I’m bored...let’s get candy”  
S. “i do not need Eli hyper”  
E. “i promise I won’t!”  
S. “i can’t trust you! I already had to ban you from espresso!”  
SH. “i want to see him hyper.”  
S. “do NOT encourage this behavior! I thought you were better than that Shannon!”  
T. “okay I need to see hyper Eli too”  
S. “STOP”  
J. “do not endanger the pure boy”  
S. “thank you!”  
J. “we must find someplace for him to put that energy to good use”  
S. “DAMMIT JIM! Well I know one way-”  
D. “ew!”  
S. “hey I wasn’t even going there!”

 

well too late. The majority decided to get candy.  
Eli and Jim got unicorn horns. First they had a sword fight before eating them, then while they ate them, Mary pushed Eli’s into his mouth quickly. Eli just pulled it out  
“HA! Jokes on you, I no longer have a gag reflex!” everyone just turned to him silently, then glared at Steve.  
“what?! don’t look at me! I didn’t do anything! Although I won’t lie, it does help” everyone was silent again. Jim was the first one to talk, he just casually said  
“Same” before downing most of it in one go. Eli jokingly asked  
E. “where did YOU learn?  
J. “where did YOU? I dunno, it just kinda ended when I became a troll, maybe trolls just don’t have them, def comes in handy with Draal. His shocked expression the first time was priceless”  
M. “wait is Draal a troll?! I thought he had some weird foreign name!”  
J. “yeah he is”  
M. “ohhhh you like monster men huh?”  
C. “oh like YOU’RE one to talk!  
M. “what’s that supposed to mean?”  
C. “you’ve hit on trolls before and they’ve hit on you!”  
M. “for the record, I didn’t know I was, the room was dark. Also what? I’m not supposed to feel good being flirted with?”  
E. “I need to know...what DO troll dicks look like?”  
D. “ew I don’t want to hear this!”  
E. “i must know!”  
M. “okay now I want to know”  
SH. “can we not?”  
M. “cover your ears cowards!”  
J. “they just kinda look like regular people dicks, except with knots”  
S. “like dogs?”  
J. “huh, never thought about that before, I guess so”  
E. “wait so what does YOUR dick look like?” Jim just smirked mischievously  
J. “I’ll let you guess. I Never will tell you the answer”  
M. “speaking of troll dicks, WHY HAVEN’T I MET YOUR MAN YET JIM” Mary yelled throwing an empty cup at his head. Jim was fast enough to catch it in his mouth and then ate it.  
J. “weelll I mean..Draal is...a little...intense….especially in front of new people”  
M. “you promised we would get to meet him! I DEMAND IT! Call him now!”  
J. “he’s busy, probably”  
M. “if you’re lying to me I swear I’ll make you regret it. I went to your party and everything!”  
J. “you would have gone to it anyways if it were just a regular party”  
M. “not the point, point is I want to meet your troll husband. At least give me juicy details!”  
J. “well he’s...bigger than me, he’s also protective and likes to fight”  
T. “ppfft, that’s an understatement”  
C. “Draal does totally love to fight, if you could call it that”

 

SH. “what like, he gets into trouble a lot? Like some bad boy?”  
M. “ohh Jim likes bad boys”  
J. “ehhh I guess? Well I mean...he’s a troll and trolls naturally fight all the time...except more...kinda….not exactly walking away...as in: two enter one leaves”  
D. “he kills people!?”  
J. “trolls kill each other all the time”  
D. “DON’T SAY IT LIKE IT’S NOT A BIG DEAL!”  
T. “to them it really isn’t”  
C. “i think I’ve seen Draal kill more than everyone else combined”  
D. “JIM ISN’T IT YOUR JOB TO PROTECT TROLLS AND PEOPLE AND STUFF?! WHY HAVEN’T YOU LIKE, TROLL ARRESTED HIM YET!”  
J. “like I said, kinda their thing, for...well everything. Violence is just kinda how they dispute things. Different tribes do different things though, if that helps. Well like for example, Draal killed a bunch of trolls for me to prove he was the only one worthy enough to be my mate, it’s this monger ritual that’s pretty much like a wedding day if it were in an arena and it was an all out kill fest. Mongers are his tribe’s name by the way, anyways-”  
SH. “what?! He killed for you!?”  
S. “that sounds bad ass!”  
E. “he sounds really violent….”  
C. “HAHA, now THAT’S an understatement”  
T. “Violence is like, his jam”  
M. “i NEED TO MEET THIS LARGE MURDER TROLL! CALL HIM!”  
J. “iii dunnnooo….i don’t think any of you are ready”  
SH. “it’s not like he’ll kill us...right?”  
D. “wait are we in danger?!  
T. “well, first time meetings are always...the most intense...he tried to kill Jim when he first met him”  
D. “WHAT!?”  
T. “yeah...cause this whole thing about him wanting Jim’s job. When Draal’s dad died and Jim inherited the position-”  
SH. “aww his dad died? Wait to GET THE JOB?!”  
J. “long story short, amulet chooses next person when the current one dies. Draal wanted to be next, I was instead, he was mad, tried to kill me multiple times”  
D. “and you MARRIED this psycho?!”  
J. “trust me, he got really nice-”  
T. “if you can call it that”  
C. “well he IS way better than before...actually I never met him during the whole ‘tried to kill Jim’ thing”  
J. well it wasn’t exactly fun”  
M “CALL HIM HERE”  
J. “okay fine! I’ll try…...hi, yeah, did you want to meet my friends? I think it’s a good idea...(lie)...the mall….alright bye”

 

so they waited. Then Draal showed up and chaos ensued. (DR for Draal)  
J. “Draal these are my friends, Darci, Shannon, Eli, Steve, and Mary”  
Eli went up to Draal and started to freak out  
E. “he’s sooo coool! He has a robot arm! Does it shoot lasers?! Can it transform into something?!”  
DR. “it’s just an arm”  
E. “can I touch it!?”  
DR. “if you’d like”  
E. “this is sooo cooool!”  
M. “he’s so buff! he’s got muscles for days!, Jim likes beefy troll guys~”  
DR. “thank you? I don’t see how time is relevant”  
J. “he’s a bit...literal, most trolls are”  
S. “yeah...well whatever...I’ve got muscles too”  
E. “you have such huge awesome horns! Can I touch them!?”  
DR. “i suppose so” Draal lowered his head, Eli felt them all up, feeling very giddy  
DR. “this small omega is fond of me. I already have a mate”  
S. “he isn’t into you! Besides, I’M his boyfriend!”  
DR. “yes, you are his male friend”  
S. “no I meant we’re together”  
DR. “we are all together”  
S. “I’m dating him!”  
DR. “ooohhh, why didn’t you just say so”  
E. “AHHH YOUR BACK SPIKES ARE SO COOL! CAN I TOUCH THEM?!”  
DR. “why is this creature so interested in my appearance?”  
SH. “he has a cockney accent!, did you come from England?”  
DR. “i did travel here on your may flower”  
D. “wait….you’re over 400 years old?!”  
DR. “no, In human years I do believe I’m over 1200” (CANNON!)  
M. “oooohooo! Jim’s into older guys”  
E. “you’re so old! So did you see historical events?!”  
DR. “i suppose so, I did not pay attention to human events. I am no longer supposed to call your kind fleshbags.”  
D. “fleshbags?”  
T. “trolls mean nickname for us...wow I just now realized it...yeah he does have an accent!”  
C. “now….just...now….all the years around him and you just now realized it”  
T. “I have a hard time figuring out accents! What, next you’re going to tell me Blinky has one” Jim and Claire just looked at one another. Meanwhile Eli was looking at Draal still  
E. “i like your nose ring!”  
S. “yeah whatever….anyone can get a nose ring...”  
J. “that isn’t his only piercing by the way”  
S. “what other-..oh” Draal chuckles from that.  
E. “i love your troll tattoos!”  
S. “yeah...anyone can get tattoos”  
M. “i think someone’s jealous their omega is paying more attention to a different alpha”  
S. “pfft me? Jealous? Yeah whatever!”

T. “are you jealous?”  
C. “i think he is”  
S. “I AM NOT!”  
DR. “jealousy is not a thing to be had, I have no intentions on mating him”  
S. “I AM NOT JEALOUS!”  
T. “i just had a sudden realization….Draal is blue...has spikes...can roll up into a ball...uses it as an attack….how did I not see this before..”  
C. “YOU’RE SO RIGHT!”  
J. “HAHAHAH!”  
DR. “what is so funny?”  
E. “YOU CAN ROLL UP INTO A BALL AND ATTACK PEOPLE?! I WANA SEE!”  
DR. “i suppose a good fight would be best for a first meeting”  
J. “nooo no one is fighting anyone!”  
E. “i wana see troll fighting!”  
DR. “then you shall see. Who wishes to be killed?”  
J. “NO NO NO THERE WILL BE NO KILLING OF ANYONE!”  
DR. “fine...then beating?”  
J. “NO DRAAL NO”  
DR. “how am I supposed to make an impression if I cannot show my prowess in battle”  
E. “let him fight! Please Jim!!!!”  
J. “ugh. Fine. you’ll fight me.”  
DR. “I will not hold back just because we’re mates”  
J. “i was thinking the same thing hedgehog”  
DR. “what is this hedgehog?”  
T. “something that you totally are”

 

nothing says fun like fighting your husband in an old unused parking lot while your friends watch.  
Jim was smacked aside and was sent flying.  
E. “you gotta git gud Jim!”  
J. “I AM ‘GIT GUDDING’” Mary was taking selfies, as usual, when Shannon saw this  
M. “you’re missing this!”  
M. “hm? Yeah fighting woo! Go whoever. I’m watching the good parts!. This lighting is amazing though!”  
Draal was sent hurling. Classic horn grab flip yeet, crashing and knocking down a tree  
J. “oops! Sorry! My bad!” Draal just shook it off and started rolling  
E. “this is sooo coooool!”  
S. “kick his ass Jim!”  
D. “this is better than a movie! We’re not in like, the ‘splash zone’ right? I really don’t want to die”  
T. “nah we’re fine!...i guess”  
SH. “you guess?!”

 

after a bit of time, the two fighters decided to call it quits. Fighting typically helped get things ‘in the mood’. They didn’t want to continue. Well, Jim didn’t. Draal still felt energetic however. So he decided to ‘impress’ Jim’s friends, by doing various requests. For Eli, he threw him up into the air as hard as he could, between Eli’s size and weight, and Draal’s strength, Eli flew up a bit too high. He came screaming back down and was shaking. Draal apologized, but Eli said he loved it! Better than any roller coaster he’s ever been on (which isn’t saying much since he’s only been on a couple). For Mary, She wanted him and Jim to kiss. They did, She took a bunch of pictures and posted them.  
‘troll hunters love!!! into bigger older dudes!’ Noten liked it and spread it around like a virus. Steve didn’t want anything, he thought it was lame. Shannon and Darci both wanted to watch him do ‘strong stuff’. Rip a tree out of the ground, smash things into rubble, eat an entire car (abandoned and trashed. So, recycling?). He did within 10 minutes. Jim told them that it wasn’t easy keeping up with his appetite. Eventually the day passed and everyone went home.

 

Draal was with Jim now getting ready for bed. Draal had a bit of a worried tone in his voice  
“Do you think your friends like me?”  
“of course they do! They love you”  
“good. I was afraid I wouldn’t have made a good enough impression. I still am having a hard time ‘fitting in’ with humans socially.”  
“yeah I know, but you did great. Although you probably should have put that tree back into the ground and not hurl it into a dumpster”  
“perhaps that was a bit much...”  
“hey you did great, I’m proud of you. Everyone likes you and that’s amazing! don’t worry about anything.”  
“the other alpha...”  
“eh that’s just Steve being dumb, he’ll come to like you”  
“the omega..”  
“Eli”  
“he has a fondness for me, I swear nothing will happen between the two of us” Jim couldn’t help but laugh loudly at that  
“oh please, he only loves Steve in that way, I honestly never would even think about you doing something with anyone else behind my back”  
“or in front of it”  
“i get it, don’t worry, everything’s great, they like you, now let’s go to bed. My ribs are still sore from where you punched them”  
“sorry about that”  
“it’s fine! I had fun...speaking of….i know a way to help make me feel better~  
“in what manner?”  
“sex Draal. I want to have sex with you”  
“OH, yes then I can do that!”


	10. Draal the romantic!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draal tries to learn how to do 'human' romance. Jim's happy to experience it. Jim's a naughty boy after. oh well, what can you do.
> 
> Also Ballustra meets teh creepslayerz. Eli almost dies
> 
> Also Mary wants to kill 
> 
> Also Toby and Steve are fucking idiots

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> really fun chapter to write! sad it took me so long DX, well here it is! hope you enjoy it!

Walt was sipping tea while reading a newspaper having a quiet day, that is until Draal came in.  
“I....Walt...I wish to speak...to you..”  
“casual conversation? well that’s a surprise, so what do you wish to speak about?”  
“Jim...”  
“oh? There’s nothing wrong is there?” Draal took a deep breath readying himself  
“I need aid….”  
“huh? A monger, swallowing his pride to ask for assistance from someone outside his own tribe, and to top if off, a changeling no doubt. My, I truly have seen everything now”  
“do not mock me!”  
“relax, I’m just shocked is all. So, what exactly do you need assistance with?”  
“mating”  
“oh...well, perhaps it-”  
“not that!. I need, mating rituals. The human kind”  
“do you mean advice about romance?”  
“yes. I wish to show Jim human romance. Ba bruh ah is always happy and feeling strong affection for you. I want Jim to feel the same way about me. You have more experience than I do. That is why I’ve come to ask...you”  
“well, that’s kind of you to consider me your first choice”  
“my mother was my first choice. However her romantic advice...well... Jim wouldn’t be too ecstatic with monger rituals, at least parts of them.”  
“you ALSO ignore your mothers advice? Truly is an unusual time.”  
“I do not ignore it! I simply...will not apply it here...”  
“Well, I can give you advice on how to procure one’s heart”  
“please. Teach me. I will be in your debt.”  
“monger debt isn’t something light either. Very well, I’ll teach you all about ‘human romance’ as long as you're willing to listen and try”

..……………………………………………..  
(Basing this off of iasip ‘the gang dances’ scene in the bar)

It was noon. There they were. Team trollhunter. Jim, Claire, Toby, Arrrg, and Blinky bustin a move to some smooth jams in the Hero’s forge, meanwhile next to them is a very confused Draal just watching this scene. Toby looked over to Draal  
“come dance! it’s fun!”  
“this is strange to me”  
“what? Never danced before?”  
“mongers do not dance”  
“Come on! Blinky and Arrrg are doing it too!” Arrrg dips Blinky as Toby says that.  
“I do not dance” Jim looked over and pointed while swaying his body  
“come try!”  
“no”  
“pleaaassseee for me?” Jim made puppy dog eyes, Draal exhaled a soft  
“fine” before getting up and padding over.  
“what now?”  
“just move your body to the grove, I used to be terrible at this, now...I’m not terrible at least”  
“what grove? I see no grove”  
“You just gotta feel it”  
“I feel nothing”  
“just relax and mooovee to the groooveee. Loosen up and just go with the flow” Draal just looked around at everyone. Draal groaned and started to just move his body awkwardly  
“okay yeah...that’s….a start...better than nothing!” Draal watched Blinky and Arrrg dance together, then tried to copy it. Draal picked up Jim and sorta just moved him around  
“oookay”  
“I am making a fool of myself...”  
“no one judges here! Besides we’re all dancing! Just practice”  
“i feel nothing though, I do not understand on how to follow along”  
“i think you need dance lessons”  
“Arrrg is far better at this than I am.”  
“don’t be jealous, you just need to practice!” Arrrrg looked up, not missing a beat with the music  
“practice! Fun!” Draal groaned and tried to dip Jim, only to do it too far and hit is head.  
“oops!”  
“ow!”  
“sorry”  
“it’s fine...good thing my heads harder than it used to be”

 

Draal turned his thoughts to some of his lessons with Walt….

 

earlier in the day…

 

“now, human romance is a very...delicate thing. it’s something beautiful but difficult to do, yet easy as well”  
“you make little sense.”  
“well, for instance. Many people enjoy flowers, they say roses are the key to the heart”  
“wait...so if I bring a specific plant, Jim’s heart will come out of his chest?!”  
“noo its a met-i should just show you examples.” Walt brought up various images on his laptop and showed them to Draal.  
“see? Flowers are nice and can set the mood right”  
“flowers will cause him to have extra sexual pleasure?”  
“no!...well….that’s not the point. Romance, passion, sensual nature!. it’s not about the sex or anything to gain, it’s just about that part of you that connects to one another. Jim has one with you about trust”  
“As do I him”  
“so, it’s roughly the equivalent to that”  
“hm...protect him in battle to earn his passion?”  
“no. okay, let’s start with the basics. Now, romance has a flare to it. Right now, I want you to Imagine the way you feel about killing”  
“easily done”  
“now. That fire, that intensity, THAT’S the kind of thing you need to feel for romance”  
“wait...i thought you said no killing?”  
“it’s not about the killing! it’s about the intensity, the burning desire!”  
“so...i must gain a bond with him...that’s equal to how intense I feel for battle”  
“yes, actually, I’m somewhat surprised that dawned on you”  
“are you mocking me!?”  
“no. now then, one big thing to romance. Are the little things.”  
“how can something be big but little?”  
“small things that have a large impact”  
“ooohhh”  
“from simple things like kissing, to holding hands, bringing flowers, holding one another, soft lighting, making things for one another-”  
“OH I CAN DO THAT!”  
“-running your hand through their hair, listening to relaxing music, spending time together, listening to them is another very important thing. Even if you don’t understand, it’s the act of doing it that matters. Show you are trying your best, Jim will appreciate it”

 

“how do I say fancy words like you do? Things that causes him...hmm….emotional responses?”  
“i...guess you could say that. Well, practice, as well as learning to be worldly”  
“worldly?”  
“let’s not focus on that right now. What we are focusing on is the little things. Now, every morning I look Barbara in the eyes and tell her how wonderful she makes me feel, how shes always the best thing to wake up to”  
“hmm….Jim...last night when you rode me-”  
“NO! Speak from your heart”  
“how can my heart-”  
“no Draal. You love Jim right?”  
“are you questioning it?!”  
“no!. That connect you have with him, what does it feel like to you?”  
“hmm...i don’t know how to explain it”  
“Exactly! But you feel it, you know it, you just feel comfortable around him, you both bond even without doing anything in particular.”  
“so...spending time with one another creates affection?”  
“yes”  
“hm...what should we be doing?”  
“nothing in particular. Although dates are nice”  
“how do I do a human date”  
“well, there are many different ways. Going to movies, romantic walks and watching the sunset, a nice dinner”  
“i think the easiest would be walking and eating together”  
“good, let’s start with that”

 

…………………………………………………………

Back in the present

“Jim, I wanted to ask you out for a date”  
“huh, I didn’t expect that today” Draal had concern building in his voice  
“is….that a problem?”  
“noo! Of course not! I’m just surprised is all, I didn’t think you would ask me out on a date”  
“so...will you?”  
“of course! So big guy, anything specific in plan?”

 

……….……………………………………..

flash back to Walt’s advice

“the easiest way to show affection is to put effort into something that you believe Jim would enjoy”

………………………………………………..

Draal smiled at Jim  
“That is a secret, you must wait until later”  
“ohh a surprise, well I’m excited”  
“well, until then, I need to finish preparations. I have a gift for you”  
“ohh nice!”  
“i learned humans enjoy sweet things for romance, honey is sweet so I brought you bee hive” Jim just was perplexed, Draal was simply smiling merrily  
“uh….that’s...sweet of you”  
“yes! Sweet! Like the honey! The bees seem to not like sharing however...they are selfish creatures. I’m sure once they’ve calmed down they will realize that this is a gesture of romantic human affection and should thus understandably give up their honey”  
“that’s not really how bees work. I love it Draal, but please put them back where ever you found them, gently. I like honey but maybe next time just buy it at a store”  
“i will do as you ask” the two smiled at one another for a sweet and silent moment, only broken by a troll running to Jim.  
“trollhunter!”  
“yes?”  
“you’re needed!”  
“what’s wrong?”  
“there’s a big brawl at the glug pub!”  
“that’s new why?”  
“a huge party is happening and some alphas started to fight over an omega.” a sad expression dawned on Arrrg’s face.  
“didn’t get invite...”  
“we thought you had one, anyways please come!” Jim sighed and rolled his shoulders  
“okay, I’ll be there in a minute.” 

 

………………………………………………….

 

Team trollhunter walked into a super loud party. Music blasting, multi colored lights flashed, everyone was rowdy and having a good time. One very large fight broke out between two huge trolls, knocking into others and breaking a large assortment of things. One massive barrel of glug cracked and flooded a small part of the pub. Claire looked in the back to where the main music (if you could call it that) was coming from, someone was shouting at them to keep fighting more.  
“fucking, of course it’s him” Noten was on a makeshift DJ stand in the back keeping the party pumping. Jim put his armor on and prepared himself to break up yet another alpha brawl. Never calm or pretty.  
“all right, Arrrg, Draal, and I will go deal with the brutes, Toby, Blinky, and Claire go deal with Noten please” 

the 6 split off into their own directions, making through way through the crowds.  
“aayyyeee if it isn’t me favorite people!, hop in go party!” Noten said watching the 3 trollhunters walked up to him  
“nice party right?  
“why are you aggravating them?!”  
“aggritavin who?”  
“them!”  
“ohhhhh. And?”  
“AND?! One just punched Jim!”  
“oowww that’s gonna leave a bruise!”  
“exactly! Stop feeding the fire!”  
“why would I stop? This party is jumpin! If anything I actually should-” Claire slammed her hand onto a piece of the equipment, causing sudden moans to play during the beats  
“aye! Those were supposed to happen later on in the song! Now the moods gonna get-”  
“i don’t care! you’ve-” the two had to suddenly duck as someone was thrown past them and crashed into the wall  
“aye aye! Watch me stuff! This shit ain’t cheap!” Noten turned around and yelled then went back to talking to Claire normally  
“now then, do you mind? I’m trying to be a good DJ here and you’re startin to kill the mood.”  
“I’m starting to?!”  
“yeah!...hmm...actually…..speaking of mood..….hey, would Jim be willin to grind on a pole? This place would go up in flames if the trollhunta started to-”  
“NO! Jim is NOT going to do that”  
“how do you know? Anyways I’m just sayin, this place would get lit the fuck up of if they were all watching him doin some bitchin moves to the beats. I’m more than sure Draal would enjoy it, everyone loves sexy dancin. That body of his is practically built for such a task, strong, thin, well for a troll at least, and flexible. Get him out of his armor, take his shirt off throw some glitter on his chest--”  
“stop saying that! And I know for a fact Jim would NOT want to do that”  
“speakin of Jim, daaam look at Draal! He practically cracked that dudes skull into the table! Hey, someone go get him a few drinks, the strong kind! Need him to-”  
“do NOT get Draal-” the two had to duck again as a huge table flew past their heads and crashed into another glug barrel, spilling its contents out onto the floor.  
“aw fuck! That better not get me shit wet!” Noten yelled out before scarfing down a sock and playing a new beat that fit more into the ‘intense’ style. Heavier, faster, harder styles. Arrrg was supposed to be helping out, but he couldn’t help but start dancing to the music. Noten laughed seeing this  
“see? Even the big guy want’s to get in on the action!” Toby and Blinky said they needed to help reign him in along with the others before things got even more wild leaving Claire to deal with Noten.  
“go dance! Get your drink on!”  
“first, no, second, I am NOT drinking whatever...that….is”  
“aww, it’s goooood. Really missin out!”  
“okay, that’s it. I’m unplugging you”  
“hey HEY LEAVE THAT ALONE!”  
“make me!”

 

Jim could hardly hear anything or see anything between the loud music and thick crowd. The moment he got punched Draal went psycho. Now Jim had to deal with 3 fighting alphas. Nothing’s more fun than trying to move your way through a party, prevent fighting, getting pushed, and trying to not get glug spilled on you. Jim looked around trying to actually find the exact location of the fighting, all he could do is hear and see the damage. Through a few small openings in the crowd Jim could see Arrrg getting into the grove and downing a few mugs  
‘great now Arrrg’s dancing, I swear he has the soul of a frat boy in him somewhere deep deep down. Where the hell is Draal?! Oh fun now I see someone on the floor groaning. Am I terrible at my job or is this just a terrible time? I bet no one else had to deal with this. I bet Kanjigar never had to calm down rowdy alphas fighting over an omega-you know what he’s probably done that more times th-’ Jim stopped thinking as he was shoved to the ground by someone falling next to him.  
‘ugh! I wish I could stop time!, wish I had one of those time things right now. I bet no other trollhunter had to stop a massive party. I bet-’ Jim had to roll (or at least try to) out of the way as someone else crashed to the ground next to him. Jim managed to get on his feet and move someplace else, getting a better view. Over in the back he could just barely make out what looked like Noten trying to tug things out of Claire’s hands while pushing her away with his foot. Jim finally found Draal, ‘casually’ throwing someone across the room. Somehow everyone else just wasn’t affected. Everyone just went about like none of this was happening. Jim surveyed the damage, trying to formulate a plan of attack. Over at one side, he noticed Blinky and Toby trying to take a couple drinks away from Arrrg who tried downing them as quickly as he could.  
‘think Jim, think. Well, great. My day’s been fun so far. Okay, cut the music? That wouldn’t work, just make everyone upset...Hmm...everyone else is fine except for the fighters. Then again others might just break out if this keeps happening. OHHH IDEA!’ Jim snapped his fingers and quickly left the building. He rushed over to rot guts, acquired something ‘special’ and came back. Before he left, the two brothers were nice enough to give Jim a wedding gift. A gold painted gaggletag (aka horseshoe) that they bedazzled the shit out of, and then carved in English (very very poorly, well they tried their best at least) “HAPE MARAGE” which clearly was supposed to be “happy marriage”. Now back at the party the ‘special’ item was a very strong sleep aid, all Jim had to do now was to just mix it in with the main glug dispenser and everything would be nice and calm in a half hour tops. wasn’t very difficult to do, hardest part was getting over there. Then dumping out the whole bottle, mixing it up and waiting. Jim just rounded up his friends. He had to push Draal away from trying to fight 3 other trolls at this point, although that was out of pleasure not purpose. Jim told Blinky and Toby about what happened, they just gave up on Arrrg and let him have his fun, party would end soon anyways. Claire at this point was glad to leave, Noten just stuck his tongue out at her in ‘victory’. Then team trollhunter left the scene. 

 

After patching Draal’s wounds up, calming him down, and calming Claire down too, Jim left to go check on the party a half hour later. His plan worked. Everyone was passed out in a deep sleep. Noten was face down on his DJ equipment, causing a song to play a 3 second loop endlessly. Other than that, everything was nice and peaceful. Jim felt proud of himself.  
‘bet no other hunter would have thought of that.’

 

………………………………………………………………..

 

It was a bit later on in the day. The gang (Eli, Steve, Jim, Toby, Claire, Darci, Mary, and Shannon. You know what, to make it easier from now on, when I refer to ‘the gang’ it’s just going to be them)  
were hanging out at a park. Toby and Steve stood cross of one another. Toby shouted while he pulled his war hammer out  
“all woman, are queens!” Steve shouted in reply as he drew a fake sword from it’s sheath  
“if she breathe, shes a thot!” the two charged at one another yelling, meanwhile Eli was recording the whole thing. The rest of the gang laid around on the grass. Jim laid his head in Claire’s lap being pet, Mary was taking pictures (as usual) Shannon and Darci were taking turns talking about their past week. Shannon was just finishing up  
“-and then that’s kinda why I couldn’t make it”  
“so what exactly did get you into trouble?”  
“oh, just maybe a little extortion” everyone suddenly looked at her in silence  
“what? I mean, that’s TECHNICALLY what happened, but I mean, not really?”  
“hence a LITTLE EXTORTION?!”  
“I think you’re making this more intense that it needed to be”  
“extortion isn’t something little!”  
“well, I mean….Mary do you think so?...Mary?” Mary was just back on her phone.  
“hm? Oh uh yeah sure”  
“you’re addicted to that phone”  
“don’t you start mom.” Shannon grabbed it out of Mary’s hand  
“hey HEY GIVE IT BACK!”  
“make me” Toby and Steve had come back, Toby was about to talk before Mary ripped the hammer from his hands  
“I won’t hesitate bitch!”  
“Jim! Do something!”  
“like what!? Mary put the hammer down”  
“NO!” Jim’s phone buzzed, he sat up and looked, a message from Draal. Jim tuned everything else out.  
D. “hello”  
J. “heeyy”  
D. “i am almost finished making preparations for this evening”  
J. “so, still no hits?”  
D. “no, no hints still”  
J. “aww, one little hint?”  
D. “you will just have to wait and see”  
J. “can’t wait! XD”  
D. “what does XD mean?”  
J. “it’s a face”  
D. “it doesn’t look like one”  
J. “I’ll explain it later, so, whatcha doing right now besides finishing the preparations?”  
D. “nothing, my only task is for you and I tonight trollthot”  
J. “????”  
D. “I meant you are a trollthot”  
J. “lol?”  
D. “why does it keep saying that? I’m trying to call you trollthot”  
J. “you ARE calling me that XD”  
D. “no! I want to call you trollthot! It keeps saying trollthot instead of trollthot!”  
J. “did Noten mess with your phone again?”  
D. “he said he was fixing it for me so I may speak to you easier trollthot”  
J. “lol, I think he messed with it XD every time you try to say something, it auto corrects it to trollthot”  
D. “how do I fix it trollthot?”  
D. “this is angering me! What is a trollthot!?”  
J. “lol, I’ll explain it later, can’t wait to see you big guy~”  
D. “the wait will be worth it”  
J. “wana try sexting? ;)”  
D. “what is sexting?”  
J. “sexy texting~”  
D. “how do messages appear sexy?”  
J. “well, its whats written. For example, I want to grab your knot and squeeze it”  
D. “ohhh erotic messages. I think I understand now. Well I want you to cum”  
J. “how so?”  
D. “like usual”  
J. “no I meant, how do you want me to cum?”  
D. “through your penis? I’m confused”  
J. “lol, clearly. You have to explain it! Make it sexy!”  
D. “i don’t know how to explain ejaculation”  
J. “dam, I need to teach you, then we can start having fun~”  
D. “don’t we already experience sexual enjoyment together?”  
D. “wait, you do don’t you?”  
D. “have I been a terrible lover?”  
J. “lol nooo! you’re amazing! I meant have fun on the phone!”  
D. “how do we have sex on the phone? They are too small and will be crushed”  
J. “wow, I really am going to have to teach you”  
D. “forgive me for not understanding trollthot”  
J. “lol it’s okay! it’ll be fun teaching you anyways~.”

 

Jim started a new conversation with Noten  
J. “did you change Draal’s phone? He keeps calling me trollthot”  
N. “( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)”  
J. “haha okay it’s pretty funny. Trollthot tho?”  
N. “( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)”  
J. “you think I’m a thot huh?”  
N. “( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)”  
J. “not even gonna answer?”  
N. “( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)”  
J. “change It back, trollthot is pretty funny, still I don’t want Draal feeling bad cause he keeps calling me that”  
N. “( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)”  
J. “you know, I heard some trolls asking around about you. I mean, I am the trollhunter, oops, trollthot I mean, and if someone needs to know where someone else is, shouldn’t I be helping them find them? After all the trollthot answers every call for aid”  
N. “ALRIGHT! Geez, don’t rat me tf out! I thought we was besties!”  
J. “bold of you to assume I even have you on my radar”  
N. “i thought I was your fav changeling!”  
J. “hmmm, I mean, Nomura, Walt, and then someone else, then I guess you?”  
N. “now your just hurtin me feelings. I didn’t want an afternoon where I cry, oh well, guess that’s just how me life is. Nothing but crying”  
J. “nice, good”  
N. “woe is me”  
J. “then perish gremlin”  
N. “hey! I told you all to call me satan!”  
J. “nah, gremlin is better”  
N. “another thing to cry about, you mocking me. Poor little me, no one ever wanted to play with me as a kid. No one wanted me around later on, no one wants to be around me now a days.”  
J. “GOOD, CRY! CRY YOU GAY BABY!”  
N. “i told you I ain’t gay! I fuck everyone and get fucked!”  
J. “smol pan sexual power verse gremlin” (a friend of mine made this joke about him like this, so it’s now a thing. Deal with it XD)  
N. “yeah! Got a problem with that?”  
J. “maybe”  
N. “go shove Draals knot into you!”  
J. “maybe I will! Tonight I might get lucky anyways, he asked me out on a date~”  
N. “him? Romantic? You sure he ain’t gonna go killin?”  
J. “well, I never did make him promise. Hmmm...”  
N. “nah, don’t worry about it, I know for a fact he’s not doin nothin like that”  
J. “oh? How so? You holding out on me hoe?”  
N. “i ain’t no hoe! I am a high class hoe. I may or may not know what his agenda is”  
J. “he won’t say nothing to me D= spill!, and how do you know?”  
N. “you know dam well I know EVERYTHING”  
J. “you spying on everyone again?”  
N. “maybe. I always have a price, and plenty of dirt on everyone. Want to know what Eli’s been doin with Steve?”  
J. “...maybe...we’ll come back to that, first tell me what’s going on!”  
N. “nope, you know as much as I do that if I tell you, he will kill me. His mum already tried to step on me”  
J. “you met Ballustra?”  
N. “yee! Big, even for a monger. Bet Kanjigar got his dick broke on her pussy”  
J. “stop!”  
N. “BROKE THAT SHIT IN 5 DIFF WAYS BIH”  
J. “hmm..lemme just send a quick text to those trolls...brb...”  
N. “HAHA FINE! Trollthot. I ain’t spillin nothin! But I will say it may or may not have to do with a picnic at a park”  
J. “nice, romantic, can’t wait”  
N. “i didn’t say nothin! Remember it!”  
J. “this thot will remember it”  
N. “( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)”  
J. “fix his phone!”  
N. “( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)”

Jim went back to his convo with Draal, who had sent a few messages  
D. “i am eager for these lessons”  
D. “will they be erotic as well?”  
D. “it’s alright if they aren’t!”  
D. “are you mad at me for assuming so? I’m sorry!”  
J. “lol relax big guy! I’m not mad! I just had to check on something, anyways they will in fact be sexy and educational, like when I ‘explored’ my new body for the first time”  
D. “i would greatly like to hear of this story”  
J. “I’ll tell you~ after our date”  
D. “a prize I shall win, along with your heart”  
J. “you won that a while ago big guy~ you still have the scars”  
D. “yes, I cannot wait to teach our child about it!”  
J. “well...let’s maybe tone it down for our kid.”

“JIM!” Toby yelled, finally drawing Jim’s attention back to the here and now.  
J. “gotta go, people trying to kill each other”  
D. “why does that happen whenever I’m not around?! Are you doing that on purpose?”  
J. “first of all, you’re around constantly when that happens! Second, nooo! Anyways ttyl”  
D. “what does that mean again?”  
J. “talk to you later”  
D. “later I shall both talk and romance you. Then breed you thoroughly. Is that considered an erotic message?”  
J. “it’s a start, k bye!”

Jim turned around to see a fun scene of the gang trying to take the hammer away from Mary. Jim laughed and shook his head  
“we’re all gonna die.”

……………………………………………..

Draal was smiling and satisfied with himself. The final preparations were currently underway. After shooing away a LOT of geese, children, joggers, and anyone else who came too close to his ‘lovers courting area’, things finally calmed down. Now he just needed the roses, some extra blankets, and the sunset….

……………………………………………………………….

Mary, Darci, and Mary hugged it out and said sorry (even though it was more of a play fight), the three had left to go do their own thing, leaving the rest of the gang. The gang got bored and decided to go over to Jim and Toby’s homes block to find something to do. saw his mother walk out of the house in a less than relaxed mood. She was rubbing her temples when she saw Jim  
“oh Jim! Good, your home, I didn’t want to interrupt your time with your friends, but I really could use a bit of...help.”  
“with what?”  
“Bar bruh ah! Where did you go off to? I still haven’t shown you how to gut it properly!” Ballustras voice came from within.  
“ohhh I see-” Ballustra stepped outside.  
“ah! There you are, oh welcome home little one, where have you been to? I was just teaching your mother how to properly-oh who are these fleshbags?” Ballustra pushed her way past everyone to see Eli and Steve  
“you already know Claire and Toby, that’s Steve, that’s Eli”  
“this WHAT IS THIS THING?!” She chuckled as she grabbed Eli in one hand and lifted him up, looking him over smiling, as if she just discovered a new flower  
“I’m E-Eli mama, please put me down” Eli nervously said, feeling the crushing grip slowly enclose around his waist and chest  
“WHAT EVEN IS THIS THING!? IS THIS A FLESHBAG?! I DIDN’T KNOW THEY CAME IN SUCH A TINY MANNER! HAHAHAHA”  
“J-JIM!”  
“Please put him down”  
“i could kill you with the smallest squeeze!”  
“JIM HELP!”  
“Ballustra!”  
“very well. Hmm, this one’s a bit bigger, still small. This is an alpha? I suppose he hardly passes” Eli ran over to Steve who held him close and looked angrily at her.  
“Steve, Eli, this is Ballustra…..shes...Draal’s mom”  
“shes...certainly...big”  
“and you are small! Such a tiny thing! I want to keep you! So tiny! So amusing!”  
“Jiiiiiiimmm!”  
“Ballustra you’re scaring him, please stop”  
“very well. Come! You all must be hungry! I’ve made food! And attempted to teach your mother, isn’t a faster learner though.” Barbara was flustered, tired, angry, and just wanted her to leave. They all made their way inside, Toby almost barfed, the smell was horrid. And it looked like some kind of twisted nightmare a pro chief with many TV shows would have. He whisper yelled to everyone  
“my god what horrors is that?! It looks like some demon’s face boiling over with tiny mouths trying to eat it’s own face” everyone sat down in the living room except for Barbara who said she needed a break and decided to go for a quick walk, meanwhile Ballustra grabbed Jim and pulled him into the kitchen  
“come my little trollhunter, come and have a taste”  
“i think I-” a piece of whatever thing that was being made, was shoved into Jim’s mouth. He wished for death. It tasted like….he couldn’t even describe it. He just couldn’t comprehend the sheer horror that infested his mouth.  
“do you like it?” Jim regrettably had swallowed some as he spat out the rest  
“I’ll take that as a no. hhmmm….guess it is a little off. haven’t cooked dessert in a while”  
“THIS IS DESSERT?!” Suddenly Jim longed for the days of yore when he simply had to taste his mothers cooking.  
“yes, I know, it must not be too good. Hmm, maybe I should try cooking the Goblin bladder next time”  
“GOBLIN BLADDER?!”  
“yes, it has a somewhat sour taste along-”  
“hey uh I just realized, I gotta go!”  
“go, where?”  
“believe it or not but iiiiiii have a hot date”  
“if you wish to eat your date then just do so”  
“no, it’s a human term-never mind. Point is I need to go be with Draal for a while”  
“oh, planning on conceiving a whelp finally?”  
“no! Just, have a romantic evening”  
“romance? So he did take my advice, I thought he said he didn’t want to kill him...hmm..”  
“uh...kill who, you know what never mind?”

Toby laughs nervously and calls Jim over, who is thankful he had an excuse to leave the kitchen. Ballustra went back to her cooking. Toby began to whisper shout  
“Jim. If you dare leave us. We will kill you”  
“ha! Like I’m not prepared to die at any given moment! You failed to realize that death is always an option”  
“haha very funny now seriously, do not leave us with her!”  
“well…..i do have my date to get to...aaaannnddd she does want to meet all of you...aaannndd I won’t have to be here...so….good luck” Claire now was angrily whisper shouting  
“JIM I swear if you dare leave us I’ll rip your horns out of your head!”  
“well at least I could go back to wearing hats”  
“you NEVER wore hats!”  
“hey, I like to have the option of doing it!”  
“You’ll wish you-” Ballustra called for Jim to return and taste something else. Jim turned back to the group  
“yeah, hey, so see ya!”  
“do NOT leave us!”  
“okay okay fine.” Jim spoke loud enough for Ballustra to hear  
“Awww you guys are leaving? Shame. Oh well if you’re busy you’re busy, okay see ya don’t want to keep you!….okay leave go go go!”  
the gang practically shot up and left. Jim walked to Ballustra who was about to shove another ‘morsel’ into Jim’s mouth  
“whooa uh hey don’t want to get full! Plenty of food on my date, probably….uh yeah so, heyyy why not continue this another time! Maybe in trollmarket! Yeah, that way you have waaay more room to work in and plenty more….things….to….cook...with”  
“hmm….i suppose that would be better...it is very cramped here. Alright, but you’d better visit me soon”  
“will do!”

.……………………………………………………………..

Jim just hung around by himself for a while, waiting on getting a ‘let’s get this date started!’ text from Draal. Jim didn’t mind being alone, it was nice in a way. Currently he was sitting up high in a tree. Listening to birds and bugs, the gentle stream below, the occasional river troll walk by, looking up through the trees to the open parts where he could see some clouds, colors of the sky changing as the day got older. It was nice, he really didn’t get many periods of time he could do this. He did feel kinda stupid, he should have just went to his friends and continued to hangout with them while he waited, but he didn’t want someone seeing him with them and somehow Ballustra finding out about how he ‘didn’t go to her child’s ‘date’’. Jim didn’t even want any kind of drama like that, so, solitude it was! Jim felt his phone buzz with a message from Draal

D: “hello”  
J: “heeyyy”  
D: “my preparations are complete, are you ready to be romanced?”  
J: “always”  
D. “good, I’m excited to see what you think! Now, I thought it would be fun if I left some clues as to where my location is…..”

So Jim played Draal’s little game, going from place to place finding little clues (although it was extremely easy. Draal wasn’t the best at guess work so everything was pretty obvious) until Jim came to a cozy little scene. It was in a park looking out onto a small pond, the sunset’s colors reflected off the water, making the area faintly glow purples and orange shades. A few dozen blankets littered the scene, along with an ENTIRE DELI STAND (Jim was going to have to do something about that later…..maybe.) a bunch of rose bushes literally ripped out of the ground, moved here, and then just let it drop to the floor all over the place, making it seem like a storm ripped through a rose garden, a bunch of pineapple cans were stacked together making it look like someone would have done it in a store, some partially chewed on stuffed animals laid on one corner of a pile of blankets, and lastly there was Draal smiling widely in the center of this ‘chaotic romance storm’.  
“so...what...do you...think?..do you enjoy it?”  
“it’s...uh...”  
“you hate it. I’ve failed.”  
“no no! I like it! I love it actually! it’s just a lot to take in, also after this you HAVE to return that deli stand, alright? Where did you-never mind I don’t want to even know. So big guy, you did this all just for me?” Draal nodded  
“yes, I took some romance advice from...uh….i took romance advice. I hoped my efforts would please you, I know this must not be like a regular human ‘date’ but I wanted to try to mimic one as best as I could”  
“i can tell, it really does have your own take on it. Which is a good thing!” Draal smiled as Jim walked over to him, they both sat down and watched the sunset.  
“i made sure no one would bother us”  
“oh? how’d you do that?”  
“i threatened anyone or anything that came near, this is my territory, no one else is allowed in it except you”  
“you didn’t hurt anyone right?”  
“no. I merely roared at them to go away. Human whelps cry so much”  
“and you scared kids...great….well, that doesn’t matter right now. So, you spent all day setting this up?”  
“yes, it was hard finding this amount of roses, do not worry, I plan on putting them back” it wasn’t going to really ‘fix it’. The rose bushes were practically ripped apart.  
“I’m...glad for that”  
“how was your day when I departed from trollmarket?”  
“good, didn’t do much, hung out with friends, came home and found your mom trying to teach my mom to cook-”  
“SHE WAS COOKING?! I CANNOT BELIEVED I MISSED IT! WHAT DID SHE COOK?!”  
“you really love it don’t you? I had...different opinions...so did my mom...uh...it was...i think she said ‘goblin bladder’ she forced me to eat some-”  
“I MISSED GOBLIN BLADDER?! THAT’S ONE OF HER BEST!” Draal was now pouting and felt sad.  
“hey, well, now that she’s here with us, I’m more than sure you’re going to have plenty of times where you can have….that”  
“you are correct, I must not focus on that. This is our time together right now. I’ve written poetry for you” Jim almost laughed, he held back so he didn’t hurt Draal’s feelings  
“o-oh r-really?”  
“yes, I read many human poems, I don’t understand them but I tried my best” Draals pulled out some papers from under a nearby blanket. 

 

“here is my first one. Jim, you are blue. I like you. You like me. You also like pineapple cans. I also like my ax. That is the end of the first one.” Draal put that one down and picked up another from a stack  
“uh...Draal...how many did you write?”  
“217” Jim was completely taken by surprise  
“THAT SURE IS A LOT!”  
“yes! I wanted to truly make you feel romanced”  
“well, I love all the work and effort you put into this, all of this” Draal nuzzled him affectionately  
“here is my second poem. My ax is large, just like I am. You are smaller than me. that’s the end of the second one” Jim smiled and thought  
‘well, he really did put a lot of effort into this. it’s really sweet. 217 though? Well at least they’re short sweet and to the point’  
“this is my third. I have horns. You didn’t have horns because you were human. Now you do because you are half troll. That is the end of the third poem.”  
‘well, at least it makes sense’  
“this is my fourth poem. My horns are large. Yours is not. We also have different kinds. Yours look like Blinky’s. That is the end of my fourth poem.”  
‘huh, I never really realized it. My horns really are like Blinky’s’  
“this is my fifth poem. We are both blue. Except different shades of blue. I do not know the different shade names. Your mother probably does. That is the end of my fifth poem”  
‘she really could probably know what the names are’  
“this is my sixth poem. I have a lot of spikes on my back. You do not. I am bigger than you. I can also roll up into a ball. That is the end of my sixth poem.”  
‘okay..how...long is this going to take?..hmm….’  
“this is my seventh poem. I like your mother. Your mother likes me. I am happy she likes me. She also like you. Probably because you are her son. That is the end of my seventh poem”  
‘ookay getting a little bored...’  
“this is my eighth poem. I am your mate. I am happy about this. You are my mate and you are happy about this. That is the end of my eighth poem.”  
‘at least these only take a couple seconds...’  
“this is my ninth poem. Blinky has known me for a very long time. He has known you for a very tiny amount of time. If we talk about troll years. That is the end of my ninth poem”  
‘wow..this...is almost as hard as paying attention to math’  
“this is my tenth poem. I love that you always pay attention to me. You always listen and help me when I need it. You are supportive and I am happy about that. That is the end of my tenth poem.”  
‘wow okay now I feel bad. Ugh, stupid brain’  
“this is my eleventh poem. I have an ax. I like to sharpen my ax. It makes me happy. You do not use an ax. I do though. That is the end of my eleventh poem.”  
‘i wonder what Eli’s up to. He did say he wanted to show me that one book’  
“this is my twelfth poem. Your step father is a changeling. Mine is not. Mine is a full troll. You have met my father. That is the end of my twelfth poem.”  
‘i wonder what it’s about, hm...maybe something about magic’  
“this is my thirteenth poem. My father loves you. I love my father. I love you. That is the end of my thirteenth poem”  
‘oh fuck I wasn’t paying attention!’  
“this is my fifteenth poem. My father is larger than I am. He is also larger than you. I have never met your real father. That is the end of my fifteenth poem.”  
‘well..it’s...true...but I don’t think of him as my real father...’  
“this is my sixteenth poem. I can carry a lot. You can too. But not as much as I can. That is the end of my sixteenth poem.”  
‘yep, that is in fact correct’  
“this is my seventeenth poem. I like to fight. You do too. Not as much as I do though. I like when we fight. Both side by side and against one another. That is the end to my seventeen poem.”  
‘welp. Now only 200 more to go….’  
“this is my eighteenth poem. I like how your fur is. It is soft. It smells nice. It tastes nice. Like your cloths do. That is the end of my eighteen poem”  
‘yep yep yep.’  
“this is my nineteenth poem. I have four fingers on both my hands. You only have four fingers on one of them. That is the end of my nineteenth poem.”  
‘oh god. This is taking forever.’  
“this is my twentieth poem. My spikes on my back are pointy. You don’t have pointy spikes. Because you do not have spikes on your back. That is the end of my twentieth poem.”  
‘it’s like...being behind an old person walking. I feel bad getting annoyed...but...still..’  
“this is my twenty first poem. I enjoy being with you. You do too. I like to eat your mothers food. You do not. That is the end of my twenty first poem”  
‘okay...this is….i gotta stop this’  
“this is my-”  
“heyy big guy, listen, I suuper love these! I love listening to them, but how about we stop for the time being, I just really want to savor them, take them one at a time. Besides we have other things to do and I don’t want to waste a perfectly good sunset not watching it with you”  
“if that is what you wish, then I am happy to do it with you” Draal then ate the ones he read and tucked the ones he didn’t read back under the blanket.

The two ate food together, (Draal eating almost everything, but that was alright, Jim was stuffed anyways. Also easier just to clean up) cuddled up and watched the sunset. It was relaxing and quiet the entire time. Other than some geese swimming in the pond. The date lasted about an hour before the two cleaned up and headed home (Draal went to wherever he needed to go, to put back the deli counter he ‘borrowed’ along with the mush that was once rose bushes). Walt and Barbara went on their own date for the night and wouldn’t be back for a few hours. Jim was glad to see the kitchen spotless, Ballustra did a good job. Jim knew the perfect way to end their date night, a little alone time~. Jim DID promise he would tell his little story to Draal, who was eager to hear it.

 

(my go at NSFW!. Weirdly I’m never turned on by what I write. Idk why!)  
(listening to low roar-I’ll keep coming, while I wrote this. Idk, I find it sexy)

 

Jim was now against Draal. His back on Draal’s chest. Draal was laying in their nest, his hand gently touching against Jim’s body. He made little rubs and dragged his fingers across the surface lightly. Jim would occasionally whimper in neediness, his body ached for a harder touch. Draal always took his metal arm off when they slept, or got busy. It was too cold and hard to be of use or pleasure. Their cocks touching, Jim’s laid on top of Draal’s. Jim was gently rubbing and massaging Draal’s under shaft, causing Draal to move his hips upwards in sync, making Jim’s cock be rubbed against the top of the shaft. Draal would lick Jim’s neck, dragging it up towards the side of his face. Draal gently whispered into Jim’s ear  
“so. where’s my story?”  
“mmhh~...well...after the whole, change, I was a bit too busy to really, ya know. Then when I wasn’t, I made sure to make enough time so I could really...explore myself without interruption. See what was new, what bits were different, how everything felt. My sensitivity shot up, just like the rest of my emotions, that was….stimulating.” with Jim’s other arm, he put a hand on top of Draal’s, guiding it across his body’s surface, passively wanting certain areas to have a heavier touch done to it.  
“i did what you’re doing now. A steady, soft and firm, hand gliding along myself. I touched my nipples, like you’re doing now. I rubbed my chest and stomach, light enough to get all tingly. I felt only aware of myself during the entire ‘exploration’. I looked myself over, then headed downwards. I rubbed my stomach in little circles while slowly heading downwards.”  
“mmmh...this is very erotic” the hand that was rubbing Draals under shaft, now dug its nails a tiny bit into Draal’s knot. Causing the owner to take a sudden deep breath through his teeth.  
“shh. No interrupting~ now then, heading downwards I rubbed right above my base. Then slowly dragged a nail lightly to the tip. I rubbed it a bit, my pre leaking out. Everything was a bit too...excited...for a touch. I was being a bit too stimulated. I wanted to last longer, so I waited a bit to calm down. Then I moved my other hand to my balls, fondling them and giving a light squeeze. I rubbed my fingers across my shaft, making sure each part of it got the attention it desired. I rubbed my thumb over the tip, feeling the pre start to leak out more. I licked my lips and moaned lightly-” Draal started to thrust upward faster, his own pre leaking down the shaft, it dribbled out onto Jim’s own cock.  
“heyy big guy, relax, I’m not even done with my story~”

 

“sorry….this story is..nice.”  
“well, be patient”  
“i do not like being patient.”  
“well, too bad. Now, let me finish….i dragged my thumb under my shaft, feeling it become slicked up from my pre. I ran the thumb down until it touched my balls-” Draal started to thrust upwards again faster  
“i told you to wait. I’m not finished~ do you want to hear the rest or no?” Draal just growled deeply in an annoyed tone. Jim just chuckled  
“i thought you said you wanted to be more sensual~ you have to savor the moments. Listen, feel, taste, go with the moment. Relax.” Draal just made another deep growl, only this one had a more lustful side. Jim chuckled and continued  
“i squeezed my shaft and balls with both hands. I moaned and whimpered...i...may or may not have imagined you doing it...”  
“mmhhh now that’s something I really enjoy hearing”  
“i may or may not have had a vibrator in a certain hole. I turned it on to it’s lowest setting, then slowly turned it up little by little.” Draal’s cock flexed and oozed a lot more pre, coating both cocks in it. Everything was slick and warm now.  
“nnngnhh”  
“rellaxxx or else I won’t continue, both my story and our little alone time.” Draal was the one to make a needy groan this time. Jim laid back more into Draal, letting his body relax against the large troll, all while letting out a long purr.  
“now then, I griped my fun little bits and started to rub and squeeze. Working it from tip to base, going ever so slowly, then sped up. I turned my vibrator up to match my speed.” Draal made a noticeable swallow, his legs shook, and his chest started to have more ragged breaths.  
“really trying to hold yourself back huh? Well I love this. I just love teasing you, making you wait, making you want it to the point of no return.”  
“i despise that.”  
“ohh you love it”  
“this accursed waiting is killing me”  
“Good~. Now back to story time.” Jim chuckled from his little torment he was causing Draal. He didn’t always play around like this, but when he did, he made sure Draal knew who was in charge in those lovely moments. Draal always hated that he had to wait, he never was patient, Jim was practically breaking him from this intense pressure and buildup. He looked to see Jim’s eyes glazed over in a heated lust, licking his lips while Jim returned the gaze.  
“i feel like I’m going to burst.”  
“good. Edging you is always nice.”  
“is this what this horrible thing is called?”

 

“mmhmm. Now hush, back to story time. I couldn’t help but moan, I tried to hold it back as much as I could, but some would occasionally escape my mouth. I wouldn’t stop wanting more, I needed to hold myself back, I couldn’t just let my fun exploration end right then and there. I pumped faster and harder, from time to time stopping or slowing, letting myself calm down.  
“nngnhhhhHHH”  
“hush, or I won’t even let you finish. If I don’t get to finish my story, you don’t get to finish at all”  
“Y-y-ou w-wouldn’t d-d-dare”  
“oh I would big guy. You know it to be true”  
“y-you’re a horrible creature”  
“aww now you’re just hurting my feelings. Now then back to my story….I’m coming closer and closer. I would occasionally have you flash across my mind, thinking of you doing this to me, moaning for you to be the one breeding me”  
“NNGHH”  
“well I guess I should get up and go clean off”  
“N-No I-i-i’m s-sorry, d-don’t l-l-leave”  
“I’m almost done, then you get to be. No more interruptions. My body started to tremble, I couldn’t hold back, my need to finish overwhelmed my need to prevent it. I gripped hard and went faster, harder, I turned my little toy to it’s highest setting. I felt my entire body shake and quiver. All the pent up energy exploded out. Waves of absolute pleasure ran through me like lightning bolts. I hadn’t cum that hard in ages. Everything seemed to just fade away, nothing but the intense high of that orgasm remained. I let everything just finish itself off. I didn’t even turn my vibrator off until I spurt out the very last of cum. My whole body seemed to have just changed entirely ever since then, like it finally ‘settled into itself’. After all was said and done, I had this glow about me like I’ve never had before. I didn’t even want to move, I felt so light yet so heavy. I practically was half asleep from it all, partly just gone out of my mind. I have to admit, I wanted to just curl up under you and sleep everything off, melt away into the bliss and never return. Now, now I’m done with my sto-” Jim didn’t even get to finish before Draal grabbed a leg, lifting Jim up and thrust into his ass. Draal started to relentlessly pound Jim, holding nothing back, going full force. Jim was thankful Draal’s cock was slick enough so it wouldn’t hurt, well not as much at least.  
“D-D-Dr-aal!”  
“silence!” Jim was panting and moaning, his body just surrendered into his mate, demanding his alphas cock. Draal fucked harder and harder until he smashed his knot into Jim, causing them both to moan loudly, then after a few extra thrusts, Draal came. Hard. Jim felt his insides practically flood. At that time Jim started to get himself off, he didn’t take long either, after all the waiting and slamming, it was easy to release. Jim didn’t even know how much time passed, the two just laid there, pleasure roaring itself inside both of them. Jim groaned and gasped as Draal tugged on Jim’s hips, seeing how stuck his knot was.  
“D-D-D-Rall s-stop!” Draal just chuckled deeply and moaned  
“my little mates stuck on me good. Good. Good. Now then, admit who’s the bitch.” Jim whimpered  
“i said. Admit who’s the bitch”  
“N-no” Draal tugged on his knot  
“AHHHH”  
“admit. who’s the bitch.” Jim whimpered out in defeat  
“I AM, I AM”  
“who’s bitch are you?”  
“YOURS!”  
“who’s in charge?”  
“YOU ARE”  
“who’s your alpha?”  
“YOU ARE”  
“good boy. Good bitch.” 

 

Jim moaned and squirmed as Draal wouldn’t stop teasing him by tugging his knot out.  
“mmmhhh my favorite part. Yes..squirm for me….mmmhhmmm...just like that”  
“s-stop p-please!”  
“oh? Like when I pleaded for release?”  
“I-I get it!”  
“did you learn you lesson?”  
“YES!” Draal chuckled more and smiled.  
“good boy.” he began to do light thrusts, really making sure Jim would be stuck for a while. The entire time he did that Jim just wouldn’t stop moaning and whimpering. His body betraying him by wanting more  
“aww, does the bitch want more?”  
“YES!” Draal started to thrust more, deeper, harder. It didn’t take long before they both blew second loads.  
“there. Nice and stuffed. I hope I impregnated-uh...never mind”  
“huh?”  
“i just..was...trying to dirty talk...but...”  
“it’s okay...I know that really gets you off” things got a bit...awkward after that. They both ignored it and just rested.  
“i love you Draal”  
“as do I you”

they both feel asleep soon after. Draal putting his arm over Jim’s smaller form, cuddling him closer to his chest. 

The end


	11. Jim ISN'T dead, no one panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim is wounded badly, he hibernates to recover, everyone misses him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay okay okay i know i said NO ANGST
> 
> BUT
> 
> BUT
> 
> let me explain. okay so, i used to only write fics for a close friend, right? so, one of them was this one. I wrote this like, a week after the 3rd season aired. so, i wanted to write a bit of the ideas (hurt/troll jim) that happened in the show, in a fic. i was going through my discord chat with her and remembered i wrote a few fics to her (i might post more of them here, since, hey, why let perfectly good material go to waste?) so i did a quick edit to turn this mini fic into a chapter for this overall fic. i thought maybe you readers might like it so i thought, why not? it's just going to sit in an old chat otherwise, why not show my old work to people who read my stuff. so, well, here it is! TOTALLY ABLE TO SKIP IF YOU WANT since it isn't going on the actual 'time line' although there isn't really one to begin with, so, idk

'thump thump' 'thump thump' 'thump thump' A heavy heart beat. Slowly. Beating harder and harder. Each time, being more difficult than the last. Each beat, Being more strained than the last. The heart, Overexerting itself.  
....…………………………………………….

It was a lovely day out. Bright warm sunshine and not a cloud in the sky. Fresh air blown lightly through the trees. Eli and Steve sat under a tree by Jim and Toby’s homes, waiting for Toby to finish whatever he was doing so he could come hangout with them. Eli occasionally talked to Steve who was playing around with sticks, making ‘wood’ jokes. The two would share jokes and chuckle from time to time. No fighting could be heard around the neighborhood, no explosions or madness, no yelling or rough housing. It was one of those uncommon days where there was only peace. usually SOMETHING exciting, or some would say overwhelming, would be happening. Today seemed like even the world needed a nice afternoon to just chill out. 

'clink clink. clink clink' 

Light clinking noises sounded off from behind the two. At first they thought nothing of it. 'probably just housework' Eli thought. Then they heard ragged breathing coming closer from behind. They both turned around to see a limping Jim, his arm around Draal’s very own to have support. Jim’s other arm clutched his stomach. Slowly he walked closer in their direction, however he only looked at the ground as he and Draal slowly made their way home.  
"JIM!" Steve and Eli spoke aloud as they rushed over to their wounded friend.  
"Oh...uh...hey guys...didn’t.....didn’t see you there" Jim put on a fake smile. Clearly a pained face, he hid behind a 'happy expression'.  
"Jim are you okay?! whats wrong!?" Eli came closer to inspect. Jim wheezed through his teeth  
"I’m fine alright. Nothing to worry about. Just, go about your business. Pretend like you never saw me okay? I don’t want to ruin your fun with Steve!"  
"No. You are not fine" Draal replied with a stubborn tone. Jim turned to Draal and gave him a stern look and said  
"I said. I’m fine."  
"You were coughing blood not moments ago!" Eli gasped  
"What?!" Jim turned to him and growled out, his hair stood on end a bit and he bared his fangs at them  
"I SAID I’M FINE ALRIGHT?! JUST...LEAVE ME ALONE. BOTH OF YOU!". Just as quickly as he did, Jim noticed what he was doing, then brushed his hair down and spoke out softly.  
"Please. Don’t worry about me alright...just...have fun with Steve…" Jim made another pained smile. He winced as he tried to take another breath. Steve was the one to talk  
"Clearly you're not! here let me go get help-"  
"STEVE NO!" Jim lashed out. He noticed his voice once more and looked down, ashamed of raising it again.  
"Just..." Jim couldn’t finish that sentence. He let go of Draal and tried to walk away as quickly as possible from them, and into his home. Jim tried his best but it was clear it was too painful for him. He didn’t stop though, His body visibly shook as he pushed himself forward. Soon he was inside his home. Draal let out a deep sigh through his nose.  
"If I may... be honest for a moment Fleshbags. I am deeply conflicted. On one hand, I cannot prevent my mate from doing his duty. On the other, I cannot watch my mate be hurt over and over again. I can’t bare to witness my mate suffer anymore. I do not know what I should do."

 

Eli asked in a worried tone  
"What...happened?" Draal sighed heavily  
"Many things....some he forbid me from speaking of. He worries to much about others. He does not want you to spend your time worrying over him. He forgoes his own safety and health for his duty. One thing I do admire actually. A dedicated trollhunter, willing to protect and fight till their last breath. However, This I cannot...I cannot understand my own feelings. I am torn on this. If only my father were here to bless me with his wisdom."  
"That does sound...horrible. Well is there anything you CAN tell us?"  
"All I am allowed to say is that, He will be fine. He will heal. He’s been through worse..... I haven’t seen him this badly wounded in a very long while. I am concerned for him, he is strong and heals quickly...but this....this has hurt him to his very core..." Draal made another deep pained sigh. Eli whimpered  
"Is he...going to die" That caught Draal by surprise, he started to laugh  
“HAHAH no no nothing like that! He just wants to lie to others about his current condition. I do not like to spread lies. Thus I do not like to say what he says".  
"Well....whats going to happen now? I don’t want to just 'pretend I didn’t just see anything', Jim’s our best friend. There must be something we can do"  
"The only thing you both can do right now is just to not speak of this. That is my mates wish. Please respect it if you value his friendship. I will attend to him do not fear. He will be up on his feet, cheerful as ever soon enough, he always does bounce back quickly. He won’t be on his feet for a while as he recovers. Well, like he wishes of you, go about your day small fleshbags, and um...well...do not fill your heads with thoughts of him. I will take my leave now. Thank you for listening to what I have to say. I must admit, This has lifted a weight off my back. It feels good to talk about this to someone."  
Draal snorts through his nose and walks off....Steve and Eli just stare. They then turn towards one another and 'try to go about their day' even though it wasn’t the same...

…………………………...…

It was the late evening. The sun only moments away from setting when Barbara rushes into their home. She notices Draal watching TV, sitting in his usual spot. Draal enjoys watching sports, he also enjoys romance movies. He says it helps him understand the 'swooning of human hearts' that it 'helps him be a better mate, understanding how he should treat Jim in 'human ways'. They make sure to not have him be exposed to bad romantic movies and TV dramas so he doesn’t pick up bad habits and think ‘ooohhh that’s how this works!’  
"Draal! where’s Jim?! I just heard what happened to him, please, tell me! Is he alright?! where’s my son!?"  
"Ah, evening bar bru ah. He is alright. He is upstairs. No wait don’t-" too late. She ran up the stairs as fast as she could. Draal snagged her by the back of the shirt just before she could open their bedroom door.  
"Please. forgive me for handling you...but.....you need to understand a few things. First, he is stable and resting. second, do not worry for his safety-"  
"I’m his mother! and a doctor! I need to be there for him! UH! why can’t I ever be there for him when he needs me. This is my fault-"  
"Shhh. It is not your fault in anyway. Do not blame yourself. There was nothing you could do about it. like I was saying, He does not wish for anyone to concern themselves with his health, I understand you are his mother but...even you must respect his duties. It pains you deeply to not be able to help, as it does me, but the only thing you can help with right now is waiting. Now, the final thing is that he’s started a hibernation".  
"Hi-hibernation, what is that?!"  
"A hibernation is when a creature must sleep for long periods of-"  
"I know that! I meant why is he hibernating!? humans don’t do these things! oh wait...is this some troll thing?!"  
"yes it is. Please, Do not interrupt me again. If you were not my mates mother I would have bashed your skull in. I am not threatening you, I am merely stating a fact. Now then, when a troll is weak and needs to conserve energy, they go into a hibernation. A period where their bodies will conserve every drop of energy they have to recover and keep themselves alive, I along with many other trolls that arrived to the new world, have done so before when we had been away from a heartstone for too long. I have been forbidden by him to not speak of what has happened. All I will say is that he has been grievously hurt in battle. It is not life threatening. He is alright. The only thing we MUST do is let him rest. No waking him up, No disturbing him in ANY way. If we were to, he would need to start the process all over again".  
"Okay..okay....okay....I...I understand but...can I at least see him? once? please? that’s all I ask" Barbara said with pleading eyes. Draal couldn’t say no to her, he had too much affection for her to deny her the right to see her son.  
"Alright...but we must not go near him, and we must be absolutely silent." Barbara agreed with a nod. They slowly opened the door. There he was. laying in Draal and his nest. Curled up in quietly. If you didn’t know any better, it looked like he was dead, no movement what so ever. No twitching and even the rise and fall of breathing was tiny. Only the very soft sound of slow breathing could be heard ever so quietly.  
"Can....can I at least pet him...like he loves...it always helps him relax..." Barbra whispered, tears forming in her eyes. Draal just nodded no. she just stared at Jim.  
"like I said, he is alright. We must let him rest. This is all we can do."  
Barbara just nodded in agreement. She stayed for a while longer, just watching him. Eventually she closed the door and walked away.

…………………………………………….

 

Steve and Eli couldn’t just stand around and ignore what was going on. So that night they both headed over to Jim’s home. They spoke to Draal and were shocked to find out what was going on. They asked if they could tell everyone about what was happening. After all, if Jim just disappears out of no where, everyone will worry. Draal agrees to this, but Blinky must informs them properly about the situation. So the next day team trollhuter (along with honorary hunters, Steve and Eli) met up at the Lakes home. Blinky began to talk to them about it.  
"...yes hibernation" Toby feared for his best friend and naturally was the first one to talk  
"What is that exactly?!"  
"you see, a hibernation is a period where a -"  
"WE KNOW THAT!"  
"Oh yes right. When a troll’s body needs to conserve energy for whatever reason and has no way to aid them, such as a heartstone or consumption of humans, it goes into a period of hibernation until they regain enough energy to continue on with their daily lives. So with that being said, we mustn't bother him in any way. Including causing loud noises that would be able to reach his bedroom. Such as for example...a loud explosion" the group turned to Toby  
"okay well MY thing was a...misunderstanding"  
"YOU BLEW UP A HOUSE! HOW IS THAT A MISUNDERSTANDING?!" (it was true, during one mission Toby somehow caused a gas leak and, well, one crazy thing lead to another and boom)  
"Uh anyways. So how long will this thing last? do we have to wait till spring or something?”  
"Oh goodness no!...well that could be technically be a possibility. For you see, trolls have varying times depending on the situation and the one currently at hand is...unique...being severely damaged as his body is, It could take a while, then again he is a fast healer, so perhaps not. Also to be accounted for is the fact that he is only half troll. Which could force his body to recover faster and work harder. Causing it to possibly take only half the amount of time needed. However it could also be the opposite. Having only a half of the capabilities means it could take even longer to recover in his state. " Claire asked the question  
"Okay well. How long does the average troll take?"  
"for bodily harm? oh roughly 10 years give or take"  
"10 YEARS?!"  
"yes, it’s quite very short. Is that a problem?"  
"HE CAN’T JUST SLEEP FOR 10 YEARS!"  
"Well he could possibly do that, if his body requires it"  
"That’s not what I meant..."  
"Hmmm. Well when my kind and I journeyed across the continent, we did have to hibernate many a time during the trip. One time we slept for 7 months, on the human calendar, and that was simply to keep our strength up. Not from fighting"  
“so, we can’t do anything but just, wait around?”  
“That is correct. The only thing we can do is wait.”  
"We never even got to say goodbye..."  
"He preferred it that way. Also he fell to sleep quite quickly, the moment he returned to his domicile in fact. His natural instincts kicked in and he had no control over the situation. I am actually feeling a bit of pride and joy. Jim’s first hibernation. It is similar to well hmm...a whelp taking their first steps. A big moment in their life"

……………………………………………….

Barbara wouldn’t leave their home for very long most of the time. She had to stay by Jim, be there for him, and wanted to be there when he wakes up. She tried to keep busy when not at work, sometimes she would nervously cook, and of course messed up her food. Even worse than usual. Some days were easier than others for her.  
“if Jim were here he would have helped me out, teaching me what to do”  
"Bar bru ra, you must not worry so much. This is perfectly natural. This is like when humans...uh...hmm...what do I compare it to" Draal tapped a finger to his chin. Barbara rubbed her face. Suddenly the smoke detector beeped and she quickly pulled out SOME UNHOLY ABOMINATION from the oven. Draal licked his lips  
"mmmmhhh I adore your cooking, I cannot wait any longer to feed!" That made Barbara chuckle "well I’m glad my son in law loves my cooking. That gives me a reason to cook" The door to the home opened as Walter walked in  
"I’m here, I hope I’m not too late-oh...oh what IS that" he looked over to see Draal eating something burnt and raw at the same time. something that looked like a cross between a casserole, a chicken, and something bubbling on top like a demons face. Something truly out of a horror film.  
"well I tried to make something....that turned into something else....want a bite?" Barbaras offered as she went over and kissed him  
"Ah no thank you, I ate before I left...besides I’m sure Draal here wants to eat the entire meal" "You are correct impure”  
“Draal. You know not to call him that”  
“sorry...er...Walt......mmmh...please Bar bru ra, make this more often! it’s perfect!" Walt gagged  
"of course you would think that..." Barbara opened up the windows, trying to clear the smoke out  
"Well now that I have...to wait...for however long, I decided to spend a bit more time with my cooking skills! maybe improve while Jim’s...sleeping....and when he wakes up, he'll be proud of my progress" she said with a bittersweet tone. Draal looked up from his food. And said with food dribbling out of his mouth.  
"He has always been proud of you bar bru ah. There is no possible way for him to excel beyond his happiness for you."  
"I hope he'll wake soon.."  
"I do not. I hope he sleeps as much as he needs. the longer the better....er...well...i mean..."  
"it’s alright Draal. I know what you meant. it doesn’t upset me. I do want him to be as healthy as he can. As long as he does, I’ll be happy. I don’t want anything to happen to him if it will stop him from healing." she gave a sad smile. He gave a smile back. It did warm her up inside, the big guy had his own innocence. He looked funny with food on his face and a happy smile, like a baby almost. A big gross troll baby. A bit later, Walter got himself comfortable within the home while he was talking to Barbara upstairs in their bedroom  
"..yes it is perfectly natural. Just let him rest and recover, and before you know it, he'll be as good as ever"  
"Everyone keeps telling me that, I know I know I just..."  
"Nothing to worry about." Walt held her hands, cupping them in his own.  
"I know you feel like you could do something, but you can’t. This isn’t a human thing, This is a troll thing. It wouldn’t matter if you mastered every type of medical care, it would do him no good." “I’m glad you and Draal are here for me. I don’t know WHAT I’d do without the two of you." "well I’m glad I am of some help." then they heard a loud crash downstairs.  
"let’s go see what our big blue troll has done". As the two made their way downstairs they noticed Draal looking up and down, sniffing occasionally.  
"BAH Blinky has miss placed my belongings! I cannot find my items! Him and his organizing, now everything is out of place!"  
"well, he does like to help out when he’s over." Barbara said as she walked over to him.  
"lets help you find what you're looking for. so what is it?"  
"Sexual toys that I use on your son during our mating. I’m trying to find it" Walt coughs in the back of his throat  
"not very appropriate to say that to her"  
"why? its the truth, and I always make sure Jim is completely sexually satisfied"  
"how about we watch a movie instead? and change the subject" Barbara said turning on the TV.  
"as you wish"

………………………………………………………….

They watched some movies from various genres. From comedy's (a lot of the humor went over Draal’s head, some stuff he asked about why it’s funny and what makes it, and some he actually did laugh at) action movies (Draal’s fav, big surprise) a couple horror movies (Draal chose, he loves them. He’s never afraid. More excited and commenting how 'i would have done this instead' or 'I’ve done that better.') to a couple romance movies, Draal actually picked out. He said he liked to watch them (He also kept asking Walt and Barbara things to help him make sense of it). However with all things, it ended. The day was over and the night had come, the three prepared to go to bed. Barbara asked while she looked upstairs, wondering about Jim.  
"where will you be sleeping Draal?"  
"I shall sleep downstairs where my weapon collection is. Perhaps Blinky has moved my belongings down there...hmm....as well as tend to said weapons and rest in our nest we have down there" Walt then said sarcastically  
"Yes, Because nothing says romance like weaponry"  
"exactly! finally you speak of something I understand" Draal says proudly in response.

 

………………………………………………………

 

It’s been a couple days now. Each and every morning Barbara goes to Jim’s door and says good morning to it. She wants to open the door, to see her son, but she knows she cant. She doesn’t want to wake him up, even if its the slightest chance. Every night she goes by it and says goodnight. laying a hand gently on the door. Draal and Walter explain that he won’t be waking up ANY time soon. So she might as well go outside and do what she wants to. She finally gave in and agreed.

………………………………………………………..

While Draal does zealously guards their home from anything and anyone that might wake Jim, he decides to attend to his mates mother, Bar bru ah. She needs him more and besides, everyone knows not to wake Jim up, or Draal will kill them. So everyone’s laying low, more or less. As of recently the big blue troll has tried to do more 'family' activities, the kind that doesn’t involve hunting and killing and training. Barbara really loves that he’s trying to be softer, bring out the more gentle and kind side of him, not something easy for a monger to do. Fun activities to help do it, such as planting seeds and tending to flower beds, tending to Jim’s garden (something the both of them have come to love), and even learning to paint. Draal has ZERO idea about 'aesthetics ' or art in any form (no troll does for that matter). So they watch a lot of Bob Ross videos (Draal complains that they make him too sleepy however). Draal mostly just makes big messes and smudges. He’s actually proud of what he’s done. Barbara laughs and is happy the two of them are having fun. She of course is amazing at it. She even painted a portrait of Draal. When she gave it to him, he breathed heavily with intense joy and said he will keep it in the best condition and make sure no one touches it or forfeits their limbs. She loves that he loves it so much, but she asks him not to mutilate others. Something he REALLY doesn’t understand, but is learning. just for her.

……………………………………………………………..

Another day of living life comes along  
"Ba bru ah, I have finished cleaning the kitchen. I hope it pleases you" Draal says with pride. After another...cooking...attempt...Draal decided he wished to 'aid her in the endeavors of cleaning up'. So he did....Barara walked into the kitchen to see...nothing there. literally. Just an empty kitchen. As if they have yet to move into it.  
"Where...did...everything go?"  
"I’ve eaten it. The best way to clean is to be rid of the mess! and everything tasted so well, I thought it would be easier to murder two trolls by ripping their limbs off and saving the skull for last so they may watch their own disembowelment before finishing them off on one go. Or I think you humans say 'two birds with one stone?'. So after I cleaned the cooking items, I decided to keep cleaning!, and eventually I thought the best way to clean was to clean everything! no messes can be made if their is nothing to help make them!" he smiled widely hoping she would approve. She was flabbergasted. She took off her glasses and cleaned them with her shirt, Then then turned and saw the look on Draal’s face. She made an awkward smile  
"That was a little over board BUT I’m very proud of you for helping so well! with such...enthusiasm too!" he somehow smiled even wider from hearing her approval. She went over and patted him on the head. He felt a wave of warmth and contentment wash over him.

…………………………………………………..

 

It’s another morning Barbara did her usual ritual. Walked over to Jim’s door, rests a hand on it, and says good morning quietly  
"I hope you’re sleeping well." Shes closed her eyes breathed slowly in and out, remembering him. From the time when he was just a baby, to now. All the cute things, the things they fought about, the fun they had. She almost wanted to cry  
'He wont be like this forever! but who knows when he'll wake up! he'll be alright. You can be patient. you’ve waited a long time for many things to happen. You can do that with this one as well.' she opens her eyes and turns around to see the sudden large face of Draal. She almost screamed but closed her mouth with her hands right before it.  
"Oh....sorry, didn’t mean to scare you ba bru ah"  
"It’s....it’s okay...wow I...honestly didn’t pay attention to you walking over." he chuckles a little bit  
"I miss him too. It’s hard at night. Not being by his side. Feeling his small frame. I have had a few dreams where hes been slain in battle and has joined my father in the after life...but thankfully I reawaken and realize that has yet to happen"  
"Yes. I’m thankful for that too. I don’t want my son 'falling in battle' any time soon."  
"Agreed, but understand that I will be by his side always. I will take any death blow just for him" Draal smiles at her warmly. she smiles back.  
“I’m glad he’s with you, someone who cares for him that much”  
"I will never stop loving him. When I think of him, my heart yearns for his touch. My loins stir as well in desire. My sexual satisfaction is no where near as strong as it was when I breed your son" Barbara closed her eyes  
"Sweetie. I...I understand you care for him, But it isn’t polite to..talk about these types of things to me" "oh...uh...sorry" he puts his fingers together.  
"sorry..."  
"lets just, forget about it and enjoy the rest of our day"

……………………………………….

Blurry vision.  
Heavy sudden intakes of breath.  
Looking around.  
Body not fully woken up.  
Needing to stretch.  
Joints cracking.  
Groaning loudly.  
Vision finally settles. "5:35 pm" the clock reads.

Jim tried to get up, pushing himself up by his hands, then his hands failed him causing him to fall on his face. His body still not fully woken up.  
"uh...ghh...uhhgg....." Jim groans and then finally manages to get up and stretch out his body. Looking around he noticed things were a bit too.....quiet....for being in the middle of the day, there should be SOME noise at least. Cracking and popping himself and doing some more stretches, then shaking himself awake. He hums slightly as me makes his way downstairs. heading towards the kitchen he sees his mom  
"morning, well, evening mom!". He went over and raided the fridge. suddenly he felt MASSIVE hunger and thirst pains. He just grabbed milk and started to chug the whole gallon in one go. Then stuffed himself full with everything he could grab, utensils included. Jim turned around and noticed his mom standing in the doorway. A shocked look on her face, as if she’s looking at a ghost. Just, staring at Jim.  
"uh....is something wrong? is something on my face?"  
"J...Jim..." she started to cry as she runs over and embraces her son.  
"JIM!”  
"whats going on? and I love you too mom"  
"IT’S BEEN SO LONG I....I DIDN’T KNOW WHEN YOU WOULD WAKE UP"  
"what do you mean? I only slept for like, 3 hours since I got home"  
"No Jim. you Didn’t" she laughs as she wipes her tears away.  
"is my clock off?”  
“no. you don’t understand”  
“okay well will you fill me in then?" Barbara looked into her son’s face and gently stroked it  
“Jim. You've been asleep for 3 months"

…………………………………………….

"3 MONTHS?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’VE BEEN ASLEEP FOR 3 MONTHS!? HOW?!?!?!?!"  
Jim was squatting on the couch freaking out. Holding his head and looking around, checking to make sure everything was real, as if afraid he might still be asleep.  
"here drink some-okay you sure are thirsty" Barbara tried hanging him some water, until he shoved the entire cup into his mouth and with one swallow gulped the whole thing down.  
"OH GEE MOM SOMEONE WOULD BE PRETTY THIRSTY IF THEY SLEPT FOR 3 MONTHS!"  
"I’m so-"  
"I’m...I’m sorry for yelling"  
"It’s alright. I would be upset too if I just received that kind of news"  
"so well uh.....whats happened? while I uh...slept" Right then the two of them jumped as they heard the door slam open  
"...I HAVE RETURNED WITH A LARGE ASSORTMENT OF FOOD.!" Draal shouted merrily, walking into the house carrying like 30 shopping bags in his arms and horns.  
"Yes. I’m glad I brought you with me. Much easier to 'return with a large assortment of food' and unload it all in one go." Walt said walking behind him, hanging his coat and putting his car keys on a hook.  
"Would you believe it if I told you that dealing with rowdy and unruly shoppers is a lot easier when you have Draal with you? hardly anyone tried to give us back talk. People now a days are so rude with everything. Why can’t people be polite to one another. I swear-" Walt stopped and did a double take when he saw Jim  
"hi"  
"...hi" Draal dropped everything on the counter tops and looked back into the living room. After hearing Jim’s voice  
"Hey Draal. So...I uh..just woke up" the house was a quiet for a moment. Then Draal laughed loudly and hardily as he rushed over to Jim, almost crushing Walt. He grabbed and held Jim tightly  
"I...I can’t...breathe"  
"HAHAHAHA I MISSED YOU SO! I TOLD THEM YOU WOULD RE AWAKEN BUT THESE FLESHBAGS AND THE OTHERS DID NOT BELIEVE ME! HAHAHAHAHA THEY ALMOST THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD! I TOLD THEM YOU WEREN'T!"  
"need.....air.....missed you too...big....guy"  
"mmmmhhhh" Draal murmured as he held his mate for the first time in months.  
"Draal sweetie let go of Jim! he cant breathe!"  
"..hmm? oh OH right sorry, sorry" Draal put him down gently onto the floor. Not taking his eyes off of him. Walt went over and hugged Jim  
"well I’m glad you're awake! come sit you must be starving!"  
"I-" suddenly Jim’s eyes shot open  
"BATHROOM MOVE MOVE MOVE MOVE!" Jim pushed Walt out of the way and jumped over the stair railing and disappeared into the bathroom.  
"HAHAHAHA! GOT HIS ENERGY BACK! like I said he would!"  
"Yes. You did. And I’m sure he will be in there for a while. Tends to happen when someone hasn't gone in 3 months. Well while we wait, lets start dinner"  
Jim came back downstairs after his relief

 

"wow....okay I feel a LOT better. I felt like I haven't gone in...huh I guess 3 months" he saw the old usual sight of Draal, his mom and Walt sitting down eating. Draal being a lot less sloppy. Still sloppy....but a lot less now. Walt and Barbara were as easy going as usual. Jim sat down and just ate everything in front of him, not holding back whatsoever. Pre-cooked food, de frosted food, and 'homemade' food that Draal ate...exclusively.....but even still. Jim dug in and ate everything in sight. even a candle...by accident...or so he says.... the flavors and textures just mashed together to creature one unknown blob. He didn’t care though. He felt dead and this was the only life he had left. The only air he could breathe while drowning. speaking of...  
"honey slow down! you're literally choking yourself"  
"s-sorry" Jim coughed out a bit of food that went down the wrong pipe  
"I missed this. just our little family having our usual dinner. It feels so strange having you back with us. like this piece of emptiness that we got used to and didn’t even notice it, until you came back and filled it in" Barbara put her hand on her sons shoulder. Jim stopped, mouth stuffed, food on his face, mid bite, looking at her

 

"gmhmm foo fgoo hhom" she snorted and laughed  
"don’t talk with your mouthful young man" Walt laughed and flicked a pea at him. After dinner Jim helped clean things up. Barbara and Walt said they could by themselves, but Jim said he wanted to. First thing hes done in 3 months anyways. So they didn’t stop him. After the cleanup he was pulled aside by Draal who took the two into their room and IMMEDIATELY pulled Jim close and kissing and nuzzled him all over  
"I’m so filled with joy to see you awake. My heart has ached for you and your touch, along with my loins. My own sexual endeavors have not even rivaled how I feel when we mate. I starve of your touch. I demand we mate right here right now!"  
"Now? easy big guy easy, I JUST woke up!...ngh....mmmh...Ahhhhh~….alright fine! just....one quick one....ohhhhhh this feels good". Draal ripped off Jim’s cloths, literally. having them become shredded and ruined.  
"Draal!"  
"Do not fear, I shall eat them, then fetch you more!" Jim rolled his eyes and got back into it. More kisses and licks and nibbles and alll the sweet stuff. Neither one of them lasted long, Being waaaay to pent up and touch starved. Draal planted his seed deeppp into Jim, who prefers it (easier to clean up. and trolls are NOT 'light loads'....at least Draal anyways). Jim had his orgasm while riding Draal. Draal’s spikes tearing up the sheets and scratching the floor.  
"I’ll...buff those out"  
"you always do~" Jim collapsed onto his big blue mates chest. His eyes fluttered. He didn’t want to sleep, He just woke up!. He just rode out the waves of pleasure, Draal licking him the whole time. "mmmh...your taste....I’ve almost forgotten it.....'”  
"love you too big guy...dam...I feel stretched out and sore already..."  
"that's what happens after being 'tight' for 3 months. Mmmh...going to have to retrain your body to handle me"  
"I would love that~"  
After about 20 minutes of laying there, talking, catching up, and even some light humping from Draal which got his knot hard again and Jim got stuck again, they got up. Jim made Draal look around and keep anyone from seeing him naked so he could sneak into the shower to clean up....  
Jim finished and then put on some fresh clean cloths, everything smelled like dust, but he shook some stuff off and cleaned up others. He had a LOT of energy. Draal even wanted them to have sex again, Jim promised to do so later. He REALLY needed to get out of the house. Jim decided to head on down to troll market with Draal. At least say hi to his troll ‘dads’ Blinky and Arrrg.  
"MASTER JIM!" "MAAASSTER JIM!" Arrg and Blinky both hugged him tightly.  
"HAPPY!"  
"I missed you both a lot! so fill me in on everything that I’ve missed" meanwhile in the other room Dic sipped from his mug and complained  
“oh goodie, there goes the nice little time of peace and quiet I was having.”

…………………………………………………………

 

The next morning came by faster than Jim would have believed. He woke up in bed, said how thankful and happy he was about everything, had sex with Draal. Then turned his phone on,  
"....hey so I’m awake...just found out I slept for 3 months. rip. well whats up? everyone keep it crispy?" after it not even being a full minute his phone BLEW UP. A lot of people talking all at once. He spoke to all of them and caught up. This took a while to do, finally he said he wanted to hangout with everyone, he especially wanted to say sorry to how he treated Eli and Steve that day he saw them last. Jim had sex with Draal again before heading on to the shower. Draal followed along and the two got a little ‘frisky’ while in it. Nothing like going in dirty, getting clean, then dirty again, and finally coming out clean. Jim felt a bit sore but knew it was worth it. They had a good breakfast and then left. Jim felt incredible, breathing in fresh air, the warm sunshine, and the sound of others existing. Jim met up with team trollhunter and got hugs from all of them, all at once. Mary, Darci and Shannon sent their ‘hugs’ via text since they were busy. Eli said warmly  
“I forgive you for being a jerk”  
“thanks pepperpal, I’m sorry you guys for not, ya know, telling you I was pretty much going into a coma” Toby replied to Jim  
“next time at least tell someone, ‘hey passin out for 3 months, tty’ or something!”  
“riiight cause I soooo could just do that! I LITERALLY went into my room and just blacked out! Then I wake up and 3 months are gone! But I promise, next time I have enough awareness, I’ll send you a text about me pretty much being partially dead for a while”  
“that’s all I ask”  
“so, in my time gone, did I miss anything awesome?”  
“actually...no...everything has been so BORING! NOTHING happened! So good for you I guess”  
“well, I’m glad nothing bad happened to anyone...well...except me” Claire started to speak to Jim  
“so, will you finally tell us what exactly happened to you? we’re all in this together. You just leaving to go do something without us is a big no no. You know that. And look what happened!”  
“okay okay...uh...well….alright look, I had to do something super dangerous-”  
“without us!”  
“-and I didn’t want anyone getting hurt-”  
“like we haven’t before?!”  
“-and I just didn’t want to worry about anyone getting hurt because I wouldn’t have been fast or strong enough to save you. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt because it was my fault I couldn’t protect any of you. So, I went in by myself, fought this giant troll monster thing, Draal learned where I was from Blinky telling him, headed my way, helped me, and then we came home. And well, you know the rest”  
“next time do NOT leave us! You know we can do this!”  
“i know I’m sorry”  
“apology not accepted” Everyone looked to Claire wondering why she said that  
“the only way I’ll accept it is if you PROMISE that you won’t run off somewhere by yourself just because you feel like you wouldn’t be able to save us. We are a team, and next time you DO go off on your own, you’d better be more afraid of me than anything else Mr.hybrid.” Jim smiled and agreed. Toby gasped out  
“oh oh! We should celebrate! I also had been storing up cans for you while you slept”  
“aww thanks Tobes. What should we do?”  
“party! Celebrate that you’re back from the dead!”

and so everyone partied. The end. I dunno how to end this XD


	12. Barbara and Walt's date!....Draal comes along.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Walt and Barbara planed a nice day out together. just the two of them having a romantic day all to themselves. until Draal tags along. well....at least it goes....well?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, like my last chapter, this was a mini fic i dug up from my discord chat. its technically some time during Jim's hibernation just to be clear. i wrote this fic shortly after my hibernation one, i wanted to write something that happened during it. so, this fic was born! now edited into a chapter, anyways enjoy! it's all fluff btw, no angst! so continue on if you want

…………………………………………..

Walt and Barbara looked at one another while they planed out a fun day for themselves. Going out to an art museum, getting coffee and brunch, going wine tasting at a vineyard. Then to finish off the night, going to the movies and watching something romantic. Draal came into the living room and sat in his usual spot, clicking on the TV and began watching something mindless. Barbara checked her purse one last time as she spoke to Draal.  
"Well Draal, we’re leaving now, I made something for you to eat if you get hungry"  
"ah, you care for me so well. So, where are we headed?" Draal replied as he got up and walked over to them, a big warm smile on his face.  
"uh...we?"  
"yes, I heard the both of you making plans. I am excited to see what you have planed. I’m sure it will be insightful as to what you enjoy during your time off" Walt cleared his throat and adjusted his jacked, he turned to face Draal and said  
"oh, uh well, we didn't really plan on having a big blue alpha bull with us. It was more supposed to be a 1 on 1 experience." Walt said in as 'I’m trying to be polite but I swear to god if you ruin this for me I will end you' with a smile to match. Draal just looked confused, Barbara laid a hand on Draal’s arm and tried to explain.  
"what, Walt is trying to say is...that...we wanted to spend some quality time together. Just. The two of us, without you"  
"oh....my apologies. I thought this would be one of those 'family outings’ I’ve heard about. The human kind where we gather up with one another and uh...'take on the day'? although I’m sure that doesn’t mean finding and slaughtering the largest creature that lurks nearby like that of a mongers. Correct?”  
"yes you are, however we’re not doing one of those. Sorry big guy, I promise We’ll have an actual one sometime soon though. Okay?" Draal’s smile faded, only to be replaced by a sad expression. He sighed and shook his head and said  
"Okay. I understand. Every relationship needs to have their own private time besides sexual adventures" 

 

"Yes that is true. So what do you think you'll do today?"  
"hmm...I suppose I will guard Jim while I wait for your return"  
"oh that’s...kind...but what about all the others? hanging out with your friends”  
"they're all busy or gone. So I shall be here" Draal says sadly as he walks away. he sat down in his spot and turned the TV back on. Walt gave a smile of relief, linked arms with Barbara and said  
"well that settles it, lets head off"  
"wait Walt..." she began as she moved Walt and herself a bit a way's and quietly continued  
"maybe we should take him with us. Look at him. Hes sad" The two looked over to Draal while Walt replied  
"he'll be fine! He has food, he has the TV, he has his ax, everything a monger could need. Just let him put a movie on, eat food, play with his weapons, and he wont even think about us"  
"I feel bad though. He doesn’t have anyone to be with and he almost always does. Did you see his face when he thought we were going to have a family outing? he looked like he really wanted to do one, and we technically really haven’t ever done something fun like that before"  
"Barbara please. He'll just...um...how do I put this nicely...prevent us from enjoying one an other's companionship completely" she raises an eyebrow at him  
"I didn’t mean that! I only meant that...he'll be very distracting and can quite possibly ruin the romantic atmosphere. I highly doubt he'll want to just sit still with wine tasting, look at art, and I’m sure he won’t be able to sit still while we have brunch"  
"can we please just try? he might enjoy it. He might even surprise us with how well he can behave" "might seems like a stretch"  
"I know I know, but my subconscious will bug me all day. Awww look at him. He really just wants to spend time with us" Walt sighs heavily. Feeling like he’s about to regret what he’s going to say  
"very well. We may try. BUT I put my foot down at the movie. He has to go home right then and there. He also can’t be running around and causing havoc. I don’t feel like having to track him down just to prevent him from doing something he shouldn’t be doing."  
"oh thank you Walt! hes going to be so happy! and I will wrangle him in personally, you won’t have to do anything I promise. You know how he is around me"  
"yes I do. Quite the opposite of how he treats me"  
"Well, see? this might help you two bond together!" Barbara smiled as she went over to Draal and asks if he wanted to come along. He perked up with a big smile  
"I thought you said you wanted to be alone with one another, not that I’m ungrateful"  
"well, we changed our minds. Just this once. Now, lets go, oh and some rules first…"

So the three of them headed off for the day!. The whole time Draal was very happy and cheerful. They give him rules to follow fully though.  
1\. he has to make sure not to be loud and unruly, keep calm and behave himself.  
2\. no wandering off.  
3\. no trying to pick fights or any act of violence.  
4\. be nice! if you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.  
5 he has to AGREE to try and get along with Walt as best as he can. So Draal agreed to these terms, that last one with a bit of reluctance, but agreed no less.

 

There they are at the art museum currently. It’s very nice and not too crowded. Walt and Barbara are enjoying themselves, looking at various statues and pictures, painted and not. Walt, knowing a surprisingly (or unsurprisingly) large amount of facts about the various art pieces. He was practically their own personal tour guide. He went around and explained various things about each individual work. From the artist, to the motives, to the styles, and etc. Draal, unsurprisingly, truly didn’t understand any of it. He started to get a bit frustrated from seeing everyone else around him understand it but him. He tried to learn everything he could to the best of his abilities, however he said it was all too over the top and complex. Barbara just told him  
"well, look at it like this. If it looks nice, then enjoy it" Eventually draal came across some more 'adult' types of art. Ranging from pictures depicting naked humans, to pieces of them having sex or just being by themselves in their very natural state. Draal just looked at them, trying to figure out the 'secret motives behind the creation’ like Walter says. He tries to figure it out on his on, but just doesn’t understand. To him, its was just humans being naked or having sex plainly and to the point. At one point Walt saw him staring at one statue and decided to explain a bit about it.

 

"..ah you've stumbled across Michelangelo’s statue of David. Not the real one mind you, just a replica." "why is this fleshbag....naked and made of stone? Why did michlango cause him to be this way, where is the real corpse turned stone?"  
"no no. It’s just a sculpture. Made of marble, chiseled and shaped as the creator saw fit. An artist sees what they desire to create, then set forth to create them. putting their ideas out into the world for others to share in. This piece in particular is a masterpiece of the renaissance period, created between 1501 to 1504. It represents the biblical hero David, it was a favored subject in Florence. It was originally commissioned as one of a series of prophets to be positioned along the roof line of the east end of Florence Cathedral, but was instead placed in a public square outside the Palazzo Vecchio, the seat of civic government in Florence, in the Piazza della Signoria where it was unveiled on 8 September 1504.  
The statue was moved to the Galleria dell'Accademia, Florence, in 1873, and later replaced at the original location by a replica. Because of the nature of the hero it represented, the statue soon came to symbolize the defense of civil liberties embodied in the Republic of Florence, an independent city-state threatened on all sides by more powerful rival states and by the hegemony of the Medici family. The eyes of David, with a warning glare, were turned towards Rome."  
"ah.........not very endowed is he?"  
"yes...I...suppose he isn’t.…"  
"are you endowed?"  
"why don’t we just move on"

It was a bit later. Barbara and Walt were walking around enjoying the last bits of the museum they have yet to see. Barbara admired one work of art  
"this is so pretty! the big blue bold colors clashing with the red! so lively so...wait....wheres Draal?" she said suddenly as it reminded her of him. The two looked around.  
"okay, how do you lose a giant blue troll in an all white building....I’m getting a bit worried" Walt just assured her  
"worry not, I’m sure hes fine"  
"no I mean I’m worried about what hes doing without supervision"  
"okay yes, that IS cause for concern. I have the sudden strange feeling our bank account is about to become far less." They decided to walk around, turning a corner and then Walt suddenly bumped into him, literally.  
"ah there you are! you-what do you have?" Draal was currently holding a large picture of a painted mountainside.  
"ah, I got this for you Bar bruh uh, I remember you saying how much you loved this art painting. so I thought I would retrieve it for you! as a thank you gift for letting me come" He smiled innocently and happily at her. She was just flabbergasted, along with Walt in equal measure.  
"did....did you take that off the wall?!"  
"yes. Surprisingly it wasn’t on there very well. These fleshbags really should attach these to the walls better. hmm...well no matter."  
"Draal, sweetie. You can NOT take art off the walls!"  
"but I could quiet easily!"  
“that’s not what I...Draal it belongs to the museum" Draal looked at the portrait in his hands then said softly  
"ah...my...mistake...I’ve failed you..."  
"Draal. sweetie, you haven’t failed me. Just please go put it back, GENTLY, and everything will be alright" Draal nodded walked away. Walt sighed and said  
"note to self. Keep a better eye on him. This is exactly what I was afraid would happen. Well, at least he was thinking about you. That in itself is sweet. Even if it wasn’t the...best gesture show it." the three meet shortly after and left the museum. well it was time for brunch! lets see if someplace has room for a troll...

 

after going around for a while they came upon a place with a nice big eating area outside. now the biggest problem they had was to teach Draal how to wait patiently, and eat 'gentlemen like'. Barbara looked at her menu before looking up at a visibly confused Draal  
"so Draal. what looks good to you? Anything catch your eye?"  
"I do not understand"  
"whys that?"  
"this does not have pictures or writing that I can understand."  
"oh uh, oops! here let me read it to you". so she grabbed his menu and read it aloud to him. Eventually he heard something he wanted  
"that one sounds good. I’ll take 20 of them" Walt spat a tiny bit of water, wiping himself he said  
"Draal. we cannot just order 20 of them. This is brunch. The food is diminutive. It’s just enough to enjoy and tide you over until dinner"  
"this food could not possibly curb my appetite."  
"yes. I know. you must at least try"  
"fine. for bar bru ah….and you.” so they ordered and ate!. Draal had a hard time, using such a tiny fork and knife. He groaned and tried to sip water out of a small cup, accidentally eating it. He finished his food in roughly one bite. Even trying to be 'fancy' about it. Then he just sat there and looked around.  
"I’m bored." he announces plainly.  
"well we are still enjoying ourselves." Barbara said patiently.  
"what am I suppose to do? I did not bring any weapons." Barbara was about to reply until Walt said "here Barbara, I have this covered. Draal, here. play with this" Walt said as he took out something from his pocket. a shiny little stone.  
"I am not some simple whelp to be distracted by this!...ohh....shiny..." He took it into his large hands and pulled it apart, only for it to magnetically be pulled back together. It would occasionally flash various colors and hum in different tunes in a sing song fashion. Barbara smiled at the simple innocence and whispered to Walt  
"what...is that?"

 

"a type of troll toy. Nearly impossible to break, and very distracting. I Brought it from home, guessing that we might need it during our day together. Apparently I was correct in my assumption. He should be distracted long enough for us to at least 'salvage' this calm brunch of ours."  
"well...I will agree with you that it’s nice that hes...content. Yes, lets enjoy ourselves while we can." they cheer wine glasses together in agreement. For about 15 minutes they talk among themselves, enjoying the wonderful day they’re having together, along with various interests and ideas, (idk what couples talk about, so just imagine). The whole time Draal is quietly toying with the small object. After they’re finished eating they clean themselves up and pay the bill.  
"Draal. sweetie"  
"hmm..."  
"Draal, were leaving" Barbara pats his arm.  
"hmm...hmm? oh yes. After you" the entire time Draal had yet to even look up from the toy hes been playing with. The three of them got up and walked about, looking around and overall having a nice time. Then it was time for the vineyard!. They took a trolley down to a nearby one (idk where they''re at. just go with it). Draal managed to fit in the back, his horns lightly scraping the roof of it. After a short and pleasant ride they arrived at their destination. Barbara takes a deep breath of the fresh country air  
"Ah. What a wonderful place. It smells so nice"  
“it smells like human and aged grapes here" Draal said as he sniffs the air, finally bored with his toy.  
"well this is a vineyard. Remember what we talked about? That’s how wine is made"  
“this...wine tasting. To sip and stir it. I’ve never tried wine. I must admit I am intrigued." They take a small tour around the area, being told factual things by Walt. Draal just called all of this  
“fancy delicate alcohol with big words and too many types”. Barbara couldn’t help but giggle while Walt rolled his eyes, although in all honesty he should have expected as much.  
"forgive him, he comes from a...simple people"  
"are you being condescending of my kind?"  
"no my dearest troll. Just stating a fact that your tribe doesn’t exactly have many things that come from various sources and ideas. Now, why don’t we try some, you might enjoy these 'fancy delicate alcohols” Draal couldn’t tell if he was being condescending or not, but they moved forward onto their tasting.

 

sipping wine and pouring bottles the two loved the different tastes and textures, comparing them to others and talked about the history of the grapes and creation process. Draal grabbed a nearby barrel and started to drink it like he would any regular drink, fast and sloppy. The two just looked at him, sighed and went on with their sipping. Draal witnessed their reaction and said  
"was I...not supposed to drink it so fast? this tastes....funny…"  
"it has a soothing texture with a small about of bitterness to enhance the sweetness 

(Okay look. I don’t know shit about wine. so just pretend hes saying fancy stuff. tbh I’m trying to write what I saw from BOBS BURGERS XD the ep of the wine train)

 

"hmm....I can’t tell any difference....these all taste the same to me"  
"I honestly wouldn’t have expected you to understand any of the different wines from one another. This is more of a human pallet than a troll one. That’s alright though, do you at least enjoy it?" "eh....its alright. I prefer glug." Barbara leaned into Walt and whispers  
“what’s glug exactly?"  
“remember that green 'fluid' he drinks, that’s what glug is. Fairly common among most trolls"  
“oh god that’s glug?! it honestly smelled worse than anything I’ve ever cooked"  
"yes it is. Glug is similar to our beer. mass amounts are made and they enjoy it” the two looked at Draal who was now pulling off an entire line of grapes from their stands  
“oh dear, we can’t have that now can we? ah draal!" They manage to stop him from pulling out too many vines and snacking on them like it was string cheese. 

 

It’s now some time later. The sun is setting and the three are sitting on a hill watching it go down. Draal a bit away messing around with some rocks. Barbara took a deep breath, enjoying the colors that painted the sky, she turned to Walt and said  
“I....actually had a good time today. Even with all the little...bumps and bruises"  
"well that makes one of us surprisingly. Its honestly like having a big blue child. If said child had an insatiable blood thirst, although with Mongers that’s actually the usual child"  
“well. I love our big blue child blood thirsty child."  
"I know he means well, but you do see where I’m coming from right?"  
"I do. Don’t worry I do"  
"you honestly have the patience of a saint" Walt said with a kiss.  
“Thank you, well you learn how to with years of child raising and being a good doctor” the two looked out at the finishing sunset. When it finished Barbara said  
"well, we'd better go to the movies."  
"oh yes I agree. finally, I’ve honestly been waiting for this part." They get up and brush themselves off. Draal noticed them getting up and walks over to them. Barbara says to him  
"Draal. we're going to the movies now"  
"ah, entertaining!”  
"just....the two of us"  
"oh, Walt will not be joining us?" Walt said in a sturdy tone  
"I most certainly will. Draal, Barbara and I want some alone time. just us. by ourselves." Draal sighs and snorts  
"I understand...." Barbara said in a comforting voice  
"Draal don’t be sad-"  
"I’m not sad about that. I’m sad because I know I’ve made a mess of this whole day. I was being selfish. You two deserve this time alone. I forced myself upon the both of you, burdening your 'date' together. I only wanted to spend time and try to make the three of us enjoy ourselves, distract from Jim being in the state he is, I know how much it’s hurting you both, along with myself. I shouldn’t have done it like this. I apologize for everything I’ve done. I didn’t mean to make your lives worse" "Draal Sweetie you didn’t ruin our day. Yes, it’s true that we would have done things differently, but I did enjoy your company! so did Walt."  
"hmm?...oh uh yes quite!"  
“Even though you didn’t want to do any of these things, you didn’t complain once or try to stop us. You cared enough to try all this, just for us! it’s true, we wanted this day to ourselves, but we'll have many more times to do them, and we also really should be spending more time, as a family. All of us together, Walt me you and Jim. So I promise, when he wakes up, we will go do something we'll all enjoy" Draal looks in her eyes the whole time, a small smile creeping up on his face.  
"we're running a bit late now though, but we do need to spend more time together, all of us. Thank you for trying your best as well. This is the best I’ve ever seen of you, and that matters a lot."  
"thank you”  
“we'll see you at home"  
"thank you both for letting me accompany you, yes I shall see you home. OH and one last thing, I was wondering if you two were going to mate tonight, if so I will make sure to give you privacy. I know in the past I’ve ruined the mood for the two, but this time I will make sure not to" Barbara cleared her throat  
"that’s.....sweet of you to consider....and....we'll see...So, what will you be doing while we’re out?" "hmmmmm....I think I shall go out and fight something. It’s been too long since I’ve had blood splattered on me"  
"okay well...just...clean yourself up before coming home...and have...fun?"  
"I will. Goodnight to you both." Draal then left the two of them.  
"well. im happy he was well behaved today, for the most part"  
"same here. oh and about that uh...mating"  
"we'll see. lets go watch the movie"

 

………………………………………………………………..


	13. Team trollhunters fursonas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “i keep getting messages! And this is what I come to!? Fortnite and terrible seduction along with pouty horny troll boi?”
> 
> or even 
> 
> "Now we’re debating if Jim’s a furry or not”
> 
> or even 
> 
> “noooo way! You are totally the OPPOSITE of a bear! you’re like, a twunk!”
> 
> or even 
> 
> "Jim’s ghost demands a eulogy”
> 
> or even
> 
> “oh, and btw, I’VE SUCKED MORE TROLL DICK THAN YOU ELI. I AM GAYER”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, my friend and i always make up random crap, ideas and jokes and ect. like what fusions would look like (fucking LOVE them. idk, i just looove when two of my fav things come together, another reason why i love oc kids, we made one for jraal (ship name). their little son is- well no spoilers i guess! just gonna have to wait and see XD. anyways chapter idea came up as a joke of 'what if trolls discovered fursonas'. a dumb  
> small joke i turned into a chapter! or at least tried to, enjoy!
> 
> i am NOT making fun of furry's in any way, just to clarify

Jim and Claire sat in her room studying for a few college assignments. Claire sat on her bed reading a textbook and jotting down notes. Meanwhile Jim was laying down on the floor poking her with his foot  
“hey Claire. Hey Claire. Claire. Hey Claire. Claire seriously. Hey Claire. Claire. Claire. Hey C-” Claire threw down her pencil and turned to him  
“what Jim?”  
“wana know something funny?”  
“no.” she huffed and continued reading.  
“hey Claire. Claire. Hey Claire. Hey Claire. Claire. Claire. Hey Claire”  
“Jim, I swear to all that is holy that I will do what Gunmar couldn’t, and that’s ending you!”  
“….wana know something funny?”  
“god. I think I already know where you’re about to go.”  
“you know….when I first became a troll...i got pretty horny!”  
“right. Like you haven’t ever said that joke once over all the years.”  
“hey Claire. Hey Claire. Claire. Claire. Claire. Hey Claire” Claire threw down her pencil and closed her text book, looking at Jim angrily she said  
“OH MY GOD JIM WHAT” Jim giggled to himself and pointed his fingers to his head  
“….horny” Claire threw her textbook at him and left the room. She needed a break. All morning Jim’s been goofing around and not being serious. Yes, Claire loved to goof off, but not when an important very heavy grade impacting assignment is due right around the corner and a certain hybrid won’t stop bugging you and not even trying, or at least for very long, to help do the assignment. Claire went downstairs to get some water, she stopped as she noticed Noten making himself some food wearing a very familiar article of clothing....  
“are...are those ‘are you nasty’ shorts?!”  
“yee! What they look like?”  
“whyyyy are you wearing them?”  
“uh. Cause I’m nasty!”

 

“yes. Yes you are. Where did you even get baby sized ones!?”  
“it’s called a tailor. A nice one down at lilly road, Jim actually goes to the same one to get all his cloths fit. Same with Eli! Honestly, the twig can never find any cloths that actually fit him, and I don’t even have to explain Jim-” Noten watched as Claire just walked away, getting herself water.  
“oh no that’s fine, just walk away while I’m talkin. No biggie.” Noten said while walking over to her  
“what’s got your panties in a twist?”  
“don’t say that. it’s the stress of college and Jim not helping, except to irritate me”  
“awww, want me help!? I can help!”  
“okay, do you know algebra 3?”  
“….alphabet 3?”  
“algebra”  
“alphabet”  
“ALGEBRA”  
“ALPHABET”  
“IT’S ALGEBRA”  
“NO IT’S ALPHABET!”  
“IT’S MATH”  
“NO IT’S WORDS!”  
“oh, my god, why am I arguing with you about this.”  
“you need to let loose and relax, I can get you some numbers to some handsome studs with huuuge cocks, or some playful toys if you want-”  
“OH MY GOD NO!”  
“ohhhh what’s up? Suddenly being a hypocrite? Like you don’t have at least three-”  
“SHUT IT! Or I’ll shove this rolling pin up your ass so high you’ll practically be spitting it up!”  
“...that’s kinda hot”  
“OH MY GOD. AND STAY OUT OF MY ROOM!”  
“aww but I get the best reception in there-” once again Claire walked away, this time out of the kitchen.  
“no hey it’s fine who cares what the little changeling has to say”  
“okay, you want to help? Let me borrow your laptop for a quick second, mines not charged enough to use right now and I just need to print something out.”  
“sure! Go right on ahead! Glad to finally be of some help”  
“are you being sarcastic or do you actually mean that?”  
“oh nope not at all I really do mean it!”  
“ugh, it’s so hard to tell with you…..wait this isn’t going to have, like, a shit ton of porn on it right?”  
“pffft please! Like I’d leave the good stuff just out in the open.”  
“not very reassuring…. Wait...is...is your username DarkPrinceOfVape42069?”

 

“uuuuhhh yeaaahhh!”  
“why?”  
“cause it’s fuckin rad!”  
“you are such a middle schooler”  
“hey! I get laid on the reg unlike those brats!”  
“what? When do you ever-you know what I don’t want to know”  
“i get laid all the time! You kiddin me? I’m a pro! I’m constantly getting dicked down-”  
“gross, stop”  
“-all the pussy I’ve eaten, the ass-”  
“STOP”  
“….tits”  
“oh my god you’re as bad as Jim, but more dirty and perverted.”  
“it’s me small stature, it’s far more concentrated”  
“makes sense. There, sent-oh god I just saw something out of the corner of my eye and I don’t know what it was”  
“chillouuutt! that’s just-okay never mind pretend you didn’t see that. Thought I hid this stuff betta. So uh, speakin of Jim, I’ve got some specific items Draal’s been wantin to try on Jim, could you-”  
“i don’t want any part of it, you dirty changeling. God what are you even into?”  
“very few things I’m not into sis. I like to party. Hard.”  
“god you are a freak” Claire said finishing up what she needed to print and left  
“aye AYE COME BACK! KINK SHAME ME! CALL ME SCUM! IT TURNS ME ON!” Claire needed a break from boys. She needed to be with her girlfriends, soon. As Claire comes back into her room after grabbing stuff from the printer, she walks in on her dearest gayest bestest trollhuntinest hybridnest friend Jim, eating her makeup.  
“NO! BAD JIM! PUT THAT DOWN! AND SPIT THAT OUT!” Jim spat out what he was eating and practically threw what was in his hands away from him  
“UGHH JIM! I JUST GOT THAT! BAD JIM. BAD JIM!”  
“it smelled soooo goooood”  
“so?! Ugh, you owe me 40$ worth of makeup”  
“40$?! why is it so expensive?!”  
“society”  
“you know, you don’t have to wear makeup, no one’s making you”  
“society does. And by the way, raspberry is sooo not your color.”  
“oh I just remembered I have sparkling cider at my house, I’m thirsty from...yeah”  
“both you and Noten are driving me crazy! Shoo! Go home!”  
“awww but I wana hang ouuuttttt!”  
“go hump Draal! Go be with Toby! Go train! I’m actually trying to study so I don’t fail!”  
“hmmm...i guess I could go hump Draal….aww I’m sorry for the makeup, I really will pay you back”  
“i know you will troll boy, now shoo!”

 

…………………………………………………………

 

It was about an hour later. Jim was a bit disappointed he couldn’t find Draal, he sent text’s but never got any reply, usually he always got replies, at least within a half hour after sending them. So far he’s gotten nothing though, something that does bother Jim a bit. Not from being ignored, but that it was very unusual for Draal to do that. Jim was laying in his nest chewing on a pineapple can while texting a group chat.

(E=Eli. S=Steve. T=Toby. J=Jim. C=Claire)

J “anyways so that’s what happened. Sorry Claire”  
T “Jim, you know you shouldn’t be getting into things you aren’t supposed to”  
J. “ =’[“  
T. “don’t pout”  
J. “look at my window”  
T. “stop pouting from the window!”  
E. “eeeyyyyyy guess who’s the fortnite master?”  
S. “please tell me you don’t play that game”  
E. “….”  
S. “do you play that fucking game?”  
E. “...”  
S. “DO YOU FUCKING PLAY THAT FUCKING GAME?!”  
E. “( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)”  
S. ‘weeps into open palms’  
E. “right when I get a kill, wooo!”  
J. “waaahhhh I don’t know where Draal is and he won’t reply and I’m horny!”  
T. “call him?”  
J. “who tf calls anymore?. Anyways I tried already and he won’t answer. I even left horny voice mails!”  
T. “true, huh your horniness always does get his attention”  
E. “speaking of horny trolls, hey Jim, did you and Draal wana go on a double date?”  
S. “I’m being there right?”  
E. “are you joking or being serious?”  
S. “I’ll let yoooouuu decide”  
J. “ohhh we’ve never actually done that before! let’s do it!”  
E. “sounds great! Wana make plans rn?”  
T. “wooo 5th wheel in my own chat room!”  
J. “technically there are only four of us”  
T. “ummmm actually Jim, you are talking about your relationships, ergo, I’m the 5th wheel”  
J. “ergo, thanks neck beard”  
T. “m’hunter”  
J. “oooohhh fancy!”  
T. “yee!”  
E. “Eli pepperfort! FTW!”  
S. “plz stop smol boyfriend”  
E. “plz stop lorge boyfriend”  
S. “is it cool if we sext on here?”  
J. “yee!”  
T. “NOOO!”  
E. “boring”  
J. “aww come on! Why not? I wana see what Steve does to seduce the Eli in his natural fortnite habitat”  
E. “it’s not that good btw”  
S. “yes it is shut up!”  
T. “make your own channel!”  
C. “i keep getting messages! And this is what I come to!? Fortnite and terrible seduction along with pouty horny troll boi?”  
J. “n-nya pwease brwing me home! I’ll be a good twoll from now on n-nya”  
C. “oh good, Jim’s part cat now”  
J. “n-nya! =OwO=”  
E. “oh my god….i just realized…..”  
S. “?”  
T. “?”  
C. “?”  
J. “?”  
E. “Jim’s a furry”  
J. “?”  
S. “...”  
T. “huh”  
C. “really?”

 

E. “okay okay okay, think about it! he’s with a troll, he’s not human himself but he once was and now is part ‘troll kin fakes do not interact’, he purrs and whimpers and whines and growls, and he does cat stuff!”  
T. “not to mention my cats LOVE Jim, they see him as one of their own”  
J. “I know, Draal won’t stop sniffing, nuzzling, and licking me after they’ve climbed all over me...but...oh god I am a furry!...or...is it a trolly? Huh, wait okay, am I? If I’m dating something that’s technically my species, doesn’t my human side make me a ‘human’. Lol, my past self was my humsona”  
C. “you know, today I woke up thinking, today’s going to be a good day. I’m going to spend time with Jim, we would study together, then after we would hangout and be dumb and have a nice day out in the sun. no. of course none of that fun stuff happens. Instead He’s annoying me with how ‘horny he is’ jokes from like, 5 years ago, accidentally seeing Noten’s porn out of the corner of my eye which thankfully I couldn’t even make out what it was, being told by said gremlin on how much he gets laid, then catch Jim eating my expensive makeup, then trying to focus, only to come to this chat, Now we’re debating if Jim’s a furry or not”  
J. “And you said today wouldn’t be fun. Wow, 5 years? I’ve been a furry for that long!”  
T. “wow, he really has been”  
E. “am I a furry?”  
T. “oh god what?”  
E. “big beefy werewolf dudes turn me on”  
S. “first of all, fortnite dude isn’t beefy, second everyone’s had a furry crush, but that doesn’t make them a furry!...does it?”  
C. “the philosophical questions humanity has wrestled with for centuries”  
J. “OMG Toby’s a furry!”  
T. “whaaaat?”  
J. “you suuuuper loved that mole costume back in highschool!”  
T. “okay, first of all, I only loved the IDEA of it. The person under it and the potential personality. Oh god I am a furry huh?”  
S. “well, two confirmed furries, one on the verge, and two who aren’t”  
E. “you mean TWO on the verge”  
S. “huh didn’t know Claire was on the verge”  
E. “you are dumbass!”  
J. “here, it’s my humsona” Jim sent a pic into the chat  
C. “Jim this is just you when you were human”  
T. “Do you want my opinion?”  
J. “always”

 

T. “your humsona sucks”  
J. “T-T”  
C. “i hope this isn’t my whole day”  
E. “ohhhh let’s make fursonas!”  
J. “am I my own fursona?”  
E. “you’re a troll, so no. trollsona yes, humsona in past, fursona no”  
J. “wut I be?”  
E. “whatever you want!”  
T. “He’s straight up a house cat”  
E. “yeah I can see that”  
S. “he is af”  
J. “waaaatttt why?”  
T. “see previous messages about you being cat like”  
J. “well fuc I really am. Rekt”  
S. “now embrace for many Draal eating pussy jokes”  
J. “oooohh YES! I totally wasn’t even thinking about those!”  
C. “god dammit Steve”  
E. “I’m a wolf who’s red and neon blue with glowing orange insides”  
J. “well, at least you have the regular color pallets of one”  
S. “you are SO not a wolf, you are like, an Italian greyhound”  
C. “I’m surprised you know about dog breeds”  
S. “eh not really, my mom wanted a small dog and she had me look them up, she didn’t get a dog but now I know there are a shit load of different dog breeds. By the way, my fursona is a bear”  
E. “noooo way! You are totally the OPPOSITE of a bear! you’re like, a twunk!”  
T. “OMG JIM JUST SPAT OUT HIS DRINK ALL OVER THE WINDOW”  
J. “OMFG”  
T. “ew Jim don’t do that”  
E. “wut he do?”  
J. “licking my drink up”

 

E. “ew, okay Steve, Claire, wut’s urs?”  
C. “no”  
S. “fine, I’ll be a wolf since they turn Eli on”  
E. “fair. Claire?”  
J. “shes totally a panther”  
T. “toootally!”  
C. “fine, yeah okay. You really do know me”  
J. “=D”  
T. “so. Me, mole. Jim, house cat. Eli, Italian greyhound, Steve, wolf. Claire, panther.”  
C. “I’m happy/jealous the girls don’t have to see this atrocity of a chat”  
J. “lol speaking of trolls, Draal just came in, yay I can have sex now! Also, I think he’d be a bull  
C. “aren’t all big alpha trolls called bulls anyways?”  
J. “yeee! But animal wise he totally is. Very violent when angry, very virile~ big horns, protective”  
E. “Jim is always riding him as well”  
J. “;)….speaking of…..ttyl! Btw Toby quit masturbating”  
T “i am not! Stop looking in window!”  
J. “then wut you doin?”  
T. “I’m playing an online game!”  
C. “ayyyeee fuckers! wut’s up? I just read this whole chat, haha! it’s fuckin great!”  
E. “are you okay Claire?”  
S. “that’s not Claire is it?”  
T. “it’s Noten for sure”  
C. “the fuc diff does it make? Anyways ima beeee a rabbit”  
T. “whhyyyy? You. Are. NOT cute and cuddly!”  
C. “hahaha, you don’t even know how much I fuuuuc! Of course I’m a rabbit”  
T. “well Jim’s gone. Jim if you’re reading this, close the dam curtains!”  
J. “;). hey, watch this.”  
T. “OMFG, I DON’T WANT TO SEE WHAT TROLL DICK LOOKS LIKE! STOP SHOWING DRAAL’S COCK OFF”  
E. “i wana see what a troll dick looks like. Take a pic”  
S. “NOOO”  
T. “NOOOO”  
J. “NOO, DO NOT SULLY THE PURE BOY”  
T. “I WASN’T GONNA TAKE A PIC IN THE FIRST PLACE!. There, now I had to close my curtains. Happy? btw you really should close yours, someones gonna see”  
J. “;) getting sum rn, of course I’m happy! Plus, who tf is gonna see? you’re the only one around rn,. Lol Draal’s complaining that I’m not focusing”  
C. “fine, fuckin ignore me! See if I caRE! I’M USED TO BEING IGNORED!. Also, good for you Jim. You go get sum! Proud of you!”  
J. “;)”  
T. “this whole chat has turned into a horror show”  
C. “oookay, Noten’s gone and I really just skimmed everything, then ignored the rest. Also the little fucker changed ALL my contacts to “big dick move noten” so now I don’t know who ANYONE is, and all the pics for them are him flipping the camera off and sticking his tongue out.”  
E. “nice”  
S. “nice”  
T. “srry Claire”  
C. “DO NOT SAY NICE. And thank you Toby.

 

It was about and hour later now, Jim started up a new chat.

 

J. “whew! Well, I’ve got good news and bad news”  
T. “what’s the bad news?”  
E. “noo say good news first!”  
J. “good news is, just got my brains fuuuuced outta me. It was amazing”  
T. “gross. And bad news?”  
J. “once again, Draal fell asleep on top of me. doesn’t hurt, but I’m bored AF and he won’t budge! I swear, a firetruck could crash into him and he wouldn't even flinch. Not only that, but if I somehow COULD get him off (haha) I’m still stuck on his knot”  
T. “gross”  
E. “aww, F”  
T. “F?”  
E. “press F to pay respects to the dead”  
T. “F”  
S. “F”  
C. “gross, but F”  
E. “let us all now un equip our weapons, armors, and helmets fello gamers”  
J. “Jim’s ghost demands a eulogy”  
T. “he was my best and most gayest friend”  
E. “HEY, I’M THE GAYEST”  
J. “YOU WANA HAVE A GAY OFF?”  
C. “this went downhill fast”  
E. “YEAH, MAYBE I DO!”  
J. “I’ve sucked more dick than you have!”  
E. “I CAN BREAK THAT RECORD, STEVE GET OVER HERE”  
S. “uh….should...i be turned on, or afraid?”  
J. “why not both? Jim’s ghost demands to suck dick and for his eulogy to continue”  
C. “okay, well, Jim was my best friend as well”  
T. “JIM CAN’T HAVE TWO BEST FRIENDS! FIGHT TO THE DEATH! WHOEVER IS ALIVE AFTER IS JIM’S BEST FRIEND!”  
C. “no, besides I could kill you easy. Anyways, he was also my gayest friend”  
E. “lies”  
C. “he was also my most hybrid friend”  
S. “no one can argue that”  
J. “oh, and btw, I’VE SUCKED MORE TROLL DICK THAN YOU ELI. I AM GAYER”

T. “weird flex but okay”  
E. “...for now...”  
S. “ELI NO”  
C. “are we still doing a eulogy?”  
E. “Jim was second best at being gay. I loved him, he loved me. He thinks he can out bottom me, he’s dead wrong. I respected Jim a lot and cared for him. Mostly because he was kinda my only friend way back when, high school and all that. Well anyways, I hope you can suck dick in the afterlife”  
J. “you know, if we weren’t gay Af. That would have been hurtful, but thank you. Okay your turn Steve”  
C. “never got to finish but whatever...”  
S. “Jim was weird, he was gay Af, but not as gay as my boyfriend. We had fun together and made up over the years. He was the only hybrid I ever knew, same with trollhunter stuff, and also could eat a lot of cans. Rip Jim, I hope you get laid in troll heaven...or...wait is there a troll heaven?”  
J. “yeah kinda, it’s complicated. But thank you Steve, okay Claire can finish”  
T. “never got to finish either. Just saying.”  
J. “well I’m sorry If I was getting into a gay argument! Just let Claire finish first”  
T. “yeah cool, not like I’m your best friend.”  
C. “I am too. Anyways he was, well everyone said all the good shit already, thanks. He was so filled with love, and loved to cuddle and be pet, mostly when he was in heat, but still. He loved trolls and people. Our weird little team wouldn’t be a thing without him. I mean like, literally, if he didn’t become the trollhunter none of us would have been dragged into it”  
J. “yeah no cool, dragged.”  
C. “he always ate my makeup and garbage, he was the best trashcan I ever knew. Rip, I hope you take plenty of dick in the afterlife”  
T. “GUH, EVERYONE SAID THE BEST STUFF ALREADY!!!!. also by best friend law, THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE. WATCH YOUR BACK YOU GOTH.”  
C. “I am NOT a goth!”  
T. “love all black and dark colors, punk rock bands, skull shirts”  
C. “that doesn’t make me goth, now do your eulogy!”  
T. “Jim ate a lot of stuff and always loved to have fun and be dumb with us and made our lives exciting, dangerous, but exciting. Also he’s a furry”  
J. “my ghost can now rest in furry heaven. Speaking of which, later you guys wana meet up?”  
S. “I’m good to meet up RN”  
J. “well I’m not. You guys can and then wait for me”  
S. “why can’t you meet up?”  
J. “Draal is LITERALLY INSIDE OF ME RN. Also on top. So I gotta wait till his knot plops out, and for him to get off of me”  
T. “gross, but yeah everyone can meet up at my place while we wait for Jim”  
E. “I’m cool with that”  
S. “same”  
C. “good, I need a break. Noten is now trying to get me to dance, also he wants me to tell Jim that Draal’s ‘package’ is here and to come get it whenever”  
J. “hm….i think I know what is it. But yeah will do!”

 

it was an hour later, after getting a text from Jim saying to head over to his place the little group headed over. Blinky and Arrrg were there making themselves at home, a very common thing. Another common thing was them just dropping by whenever, no one cared or complained about that. Blinky always had to prevent Arrrg from eating everything in sight most of the time. The group said their hellos to the two trolls, Toby and Arrrg doing their fist bumps as per usual. Finally Jim walked downstairs to see his everyone. Toby huffed out  
“fiiinnnaaallllyyyy! When you told us to come over I thought you meant you were actually ready!”  
“sorry, you know how long it takes to brush and dry my fur, plus Draal kept getting handsy in the bathroom, finally managed to get him to stop and start showering. Anyways, your hybrid is here!”  
“where your parents at?”  
“out doing something, date or whatever, I wasn’t paying attention, kinda was about to get laid” Claire gasped out  
“ooh! You should wear that collar I gave you”  
“whhaaatt, why?”  
“cause it looks cute on you”  
“just came from upstairs but whatever” ran off then came back with a ‘crispy’ slide down the rail then did a sweet flip, tucked and rolled and crashed into the wall. Then played it off cool  
“suuup” Blinky looked a bit worried along with Arrrg  
“are you alright master Jim?”  
“nope! Totally fine!” Jim got up and adjusted his cloths while Claire came over and adjusted his collar  
“See? You look cute in it”  
“aww, if I could blush I would” Toby smiled with pride  
“look at our big house cat”  
“well don’t I feel loved, maybe I should try the ‘if I fits I sits’”  
“aww we should get you a little bell!”  
“I’m not a pet!”  
“well...i mean...” Eli gasped  
“i wana get one too!” Steve just looked at him not sure how to feel  
“what why?”  
“i think It’ll look cute,, plus we’d be supporting Jim” Eli gasped out again  
“WE SHOULD GET MATCHING ONES STEVE!”  
“really going balls deep into this fursona thing” Blinky was about to say something until a certain troll spoke first

 

“what’s a fursona? And why are you going balls deep into it?” the group turned to See Draal coming down the stairs. The group went silent except for Jim  
“NOTHING!”  
“i wish to know, what are you hiding from me?” Jim looked to the group  
“should I tell him?” they shook their head no while Toby replied  
“trolls don’t need to know this” Arrrg and Blinky looked at one another in curiosity, a bit hurt as well. Why were they supposed to be left out of whatever ‘human’ thing this was. Draal now grunted angrily  
“I’m starting to get upset! Why can’t I know? I don’t like when you hide things from me Jim!” Jim put up his hands in a calming motion  
“okay okay okay! Well….” after some strange explanations, Draal just thought to himself then finally commented  
“i want to make one. “  
“REALLY?!”  
“yes. It sounds enjoyable. I want to be something that’s unkillable.” Arrrg and Blinky both stated they wanted to make one too  
“well Draal, there isn’t really an animal that’s unkillable...i think you’d be a bull though!”  
“i already am a bull”  
“no, I meant the animal”  
“no, I want to be something unkillable and all powerful, like the ocean”  
“...i mean….yeah its….that….but you can’t be that”  
“fine. Then I will be a bull.”  
“yay! Well, you bull, me house cat, Toby mole, Claire panther, Eli Italian greyhound, and Steve’s a wolf. Now we get-”  
“i want mine to be all powerful and unkillable”  
“uh-”  
“i want him to wield a million ax’s and be giant”  
“well-”  
“i also want him to fly, and breathe fire, and predict the future” Toby’s trying to hold back laughing as much as he can while saying  
“well….this spiraled out of control faster than I had thought. Well, there’s been weirder fursonas” Eli speaks up  
“well if we’re going to go like that, then I want mine to be a cyborg with a laser machine gun, he also has heat vision and night vision, and has pinpoint accuracy” Steve rolls his eyes  
“well, I want my wolf dude to be the master at every sport, and seduction, and...i don’t know, have wings?” Draal snarled at him  
“yours cannot have wings! mine’s the one who can fly!”  
“alright then I guess, he’s the grim reaper secretly.” Blinky cleared his throat  
“if I may speak next, I’ve always been partial to Bubo virginianus.” Steve snorted  
“Virgin anus?” Eli slapped his chest  
“he means Great horned owls” Blinky went back to talking  
“perhaps my bubo virginianus has the capabilities to own all the worlds knowledge and wisdom” Arrrg was practically bouncing with Excitement  
“my turn!. Lion” Toby finally calmed down enough to reply to Arrrg  
“just a lion? Nothing ‘awesome’”  
“just lion”  
“okay cool, guess I’ll go next. I want my mole to be able to move through any solid object as if it were nothing, I want him to be able to sense any kind of danger at any given moment, I want him to be invincible-” Draal growled at him  
“i already ‘called’ that mine would be unkillable!”  
“invincible and unkillable are two different things. I want his claws to be able to cut through anything aaaaaaaaaand he has a heart of gold. Literally and metaphorically, oh and he can do sweet kick flips and BMX stunts” Claire went next  
“well I guess it’s my turn. Hmm, I want my panther to….be able to turn invisible, teleport, hmm...read peoples minds, and climb on any surface”

Jim chuckled and looked at everyone  
“okay, then it’s settled. let’s be creative”


	14. Monger madness! pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> at first a fun party! then something unusual, something rare, something not done before happens. welcome, to the Monger tribe's home. 
> 
> WHY DID YOU GIVE THAT TO ELI?!
> 
> Draal, someone help teach this poor blue boy how to be more social

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SUPER FUN TO WRITE! i did NOT want to rush this, so get ready for part two! it gets even better

Jim moaned lightly in his throat. He looked down to his mate who was riding the high of his orgasm. It was early that morning, Draal had woken up and wouldn’t stop pestering Jim into having a little morning fun. Jim eventually woke up after being bothered with for so long, then caved in and rode Draal like the bull of an alpha he is. Draal was totally out of it, Jim chuckled seeing him like this.  
“so, you have fun big guy?”  
“mmmmmhhhhhmmmmmm”  
“you all finished up?”  
“yyeeesssssss”  
“did I make my big blue bull alpha happy?”  
“mmmmmhhhhhmmmmm” Jim smiles and gently runs his nails down Draal’s chest, just like he loves, it becomes far better post sex.  
“mmmmmmhhhhhmmmmm yooouuu arree tooo goood foorr meee”  
“aww, don’t say that”  
“i love you”  
“love you too big guy” it wasn’t long after that Draal fell back to sleep. Jim was somewhat glad, maybe now HE could fall back to sleep. At least for an hour or two. Jim did his usual of cuddling up on Draal’s chest and tucking his head under Draal’s then drifting off to sleep.….

It was a little after 8am, Jim was...upset? He wasn’t sure. Draal had a tendency to sleep hump, which made his dick hard, including his knot, which meant it kept Jim stuck on it longer. So, Jim just waited, all he could do really. He wasn’t really able to fully fall back to sleep. Eventually he got bored of trying to fall asleep, so he grabbed his phone and started up a text convo.

(J=Jim. C=Claire. T=Toby)

 

J. “anyone up?”  
C. “yeah”  
T. “hardly. Too early! Go to sleeeeep”  
J. “tried, can’t. Draal woke me up like, an hour ago, had sex, he totally passed out, and as usual I’m stuck. Would have been able to leave by now, except he has this habit of sleep humping, so, well, he re hardened and now I’m stuck longer”  
T. “gross, but that sucks”  
C. “TMI. But yeah that does suck”  
J. “so, whatcha gonna do today my fellows”  
T. “fellow wut? Lol, idk, I can hardly keep my eyes open”  
C. “actually I’m going to help throw my mom another re election party here”  
T. “really going for it huh?”  
J. “oohhh fuun!”  
C. “would either of you gentleman be willing to attend? Keep me from wanting to die from sheer dullness?”  
J. “whats wrong? don’t like politics? You really should be more invested you know, this is your future!”  
C. “gee thanks mom, not like I’m always hearing that 24/7”  
J. “hey, I didn’t carry you around for 9 months and raise you for 21 years just to have you sass me young lady! I raised you better than that!”  
T. “for a second I honestly was like ‘wait are they related?’ man I’m tired”  
J. “go to sleep sweet Toby, rest, you’re clearly not able to think rn”  
T. “niiiiiggghtt...or...morning?. Whatever, I’m passin out, peace”  
C. “so, mr hybrid omega, you wana come?”  
J. “i honestly don’t have any plans, sure! Plus it always is nice to prevent you from dying”  
C. “nice! Really are a girls best gay”  
J. “i try to be, what time should I come over?”  
C. “honestly, anytime, would looove some help putting things up if you don’t mind, you are tall enough to reach stuff, and also help me try to reign in Noten.”  
J. “oohhh yeah. He always tries to get the party pumpin.”  
C. “ugh, last time was a nightmare. Long story short, he put a bunch of firecrackers in a looot of places, really did ‘get people movin’. Not fun to clean up. Anyways, head on over whenever”  
J. “kk, the moment I get off this knot, i’ll shower and head over”  
C. “why do you talk so much about your sex life?”  
J. “i honestly thought it didn’t matter, we’re open about everything else, we talk about everything”  
C. “okay fair point”  
J. “if YOU had a bf, I’m more than sure you’d wana gossip about dat diiiiicc”  
C. “okay maybe so. Alright, gtg, mom’s giving me the ‘hurry up or else’ look”  
J. “kk”

 

about an hour later Jim was at the party helping put up banners and decorations. It wasn’t very hard to hear Claire and her mom talk a few feet away from him  
“I’m just saying, he’s a great guy...troll..person, don’t see why you stopped”  
“mom, 1. he’s gay, I don’t know how many times I have to keep telling you that. And 2. hes married”  
“has he even tried to kiss a girl? Wait married?”  
“long story short, yeah he got married a few months ago. Wow their 6 month anniversary is actually coming up soon. And yes he has” Jim chuckled and thought ‘oh shit, my anniversary really is right around the corner. What should I do for it?’  
“-Jim”  
“huh? Oh sorry Claire, kinda was in my head”  
“that’s alright, help me with this last banner, the guests should be arriving anytime”

 

…………………………………………………………………….

 

Claire’s parents were arguing yet again about cooking various foods.  
“cook. Them.”  
“no one likes them”  
“Jim likes them”  
“Jim eats anything! He’s literally eating a plastic cup right now”

they both look over to Jim sitting down munching on his cup casually.  
“Speaking of Jim” she said walking over to him  
“hi Mrs. Nunez”  
“hello Jim, I was wondering something, you are such a good friend to Claire, supportive, sweet, caring”  
“I try to be, as her best friend I make it a habit”  
“yes, well I was actually wondering, you have ties to the trolls. Would it be possible to maybe, put in a good word for me with them? Assuming any of them are registered to vote” Jim smiled and grabbed another plastic cup  
“well, the thing is, most troll tribes don’t vote….it’s more of...’challenging one another to the death, and whoever isn’t brutally slaughtered at the end of it gets to call the shots.’ I mean...i could throw your hat in the ring...”  
“oh, goodness no!, no thank you.” Jim smiled warmly in reply. She then brought up the next question on her mind  
“so, I hear you have a husband”  
“yeah, he’s a great guy”  
“is he coming?”  
“oh uh, no he isn’t. he’s not very...sociable and easy going”  
“well, I hope maybe you could convince him to support me? Like you are”  
“ooohhh uh….no”  
“oh, I assumed you would want to help your best friends mother”  
“nonon! Trust me, you got my vote!. I just meant he isn’t really the voting type, actually come to think of it he isn’t even registered-” the conversation ended by the sudden loud sound of rap  
“bouncin those titties up on ma dick, tittied fuck ya like the hoe you are. Treat a hoe like a-" it was turned off just in time as people started to notice. 

…………………………………………………………………..

Claire took a deep breath and walked through her home, her parents were arguing once more about various foods. She put her baby brother down into his bouncer then went into her kitchen to bring out more food for the party goers.  
“ayyyeee sis, hows it goin?” she turned to see a ‘stylish’ looking Noten. Fur combed, tiny pants, a pink jacket that covered a ‘suggestive’ word play on a T shirt.  
“well, you look presentable for the first time in ages”  
“haha, I do like to look me best at times. Dress to impress. Not like I hang around in diapers no more. Anyways, I wana impress our guests, get their asses to vote for the right person”  
“well, I’m happy you feel that way. don’t. Screw. it. up.”  
“waaaah me? Naaah, hey I always try me hardest!”  
“like last time?”  
“heyyy things were getting stiff! Had to lighten it up somehow!”  
“right. don’t try anything.”  
“i swear on me life I won’t do nothin that will harm this little shindig. I’m only here to improve it, I’ll be on me best behavior”  
“well, I’m happy to hear that”  
“Sooo, you gonna get any?”  
“i really hope you don’t mean what I know for a fact you mean. And no, these are all adults, far older than I am”  
“so? Get someone experienced, they’re only like, ten years older”  
“yeah no.”  
“ohhhh look at that, dear old ma’s talkin to our bestie” the two turn to look through the window to see Claire’s mom talking to Jim.  
“our?”  
“yee!”  
“i doubt he considers you his ‘bestie’”  
“ayyyeee! I am nothin but a good time! I try me best to be the bestest friend I can be! Besides, he loves me, so do you. OoooOOoooo someone’s talkin about their hubby”  
“what?” the two listened to their conversation, or at least tried to through all the chatting guests  
“-not very sociable and easy going” Claire groaned  
“ugh. Now she’s on that. I have to go save Jim”  
“naahhh he’s got it, besides you’ve gotta help me get this place to liven up! you’d think that everyone at a party would want to loosen up”  
“noooo no no no! This is not one of those kinds of parties!”  
“well...tomato and all that crap. A party is for fun! let’s make it more fun!”  
“what exactly do you plan on ‘making things more fun’” Noten chuckled and did a small leap over onto another counter  
“check this shit out” he turned on the speakers and suddenly rap blasted  
“nononono! Turn that off!” Noten did as he was commanded to do  
“awww whyyy”  
“you JUST swore you wouldn’t do anything like this!”  
“hey I swore to do nothin to harm this! I was tryin-” Mrs. Nunez came into the house looking miffed  
“okay, one of you explain what’s going on right now?” the two women looked at Noten  
“whooaa why did ya assume it was me!?”  
“it’s always you.”  
“hey maaa wheres the love?”  
“Claire. Keep him from doing anything. Noten, don’t do anything. This party is just a couple more hours, if that, and if everything runs smoothly, I’ll get you both something nice, I don’t care what it is, just keep everything under control. I don’t want anything to ruin this party. Nothing big and destructive. Got it?”  
“yes mum” the doorbell rang, Mrs. Nunez took a long deep breath, regaining her composure before going to answer it.  
Claire turned to Noten  
“this is why mom doesn’t fucking love you!” 

back at the front door  
“hello! Welcome to-” she did a sudden gasp in shock  
“ah, hello. Is Jim here?”

……………………………………………………….

Jim was being tossed food by Mr. Nunez, catching it in his mouth and munching happily  
“you get what I mean? Far better than any of that crap” Jim was just smiling with a big mouthful.  
“and she goes on and on about this, honestly, I haven’t had one person complain about our food, suddenly I’m the bad guy though? See! You love my cooking better than any of that crap don’t you?” Jim swallowed down some of the food before being tossed more. Mid swallow he looks to see Draal suddenly walk out of the back door. Jim gags and chokes on his food.  
“d-d-draal?!” Jim coughs out. All the guests are staring at the large blue troll as he looks around. He finally spots Jim and grows a big smile on his face. As he walks over Jim finally coughs out the last of the food.  
“hello my mate~”  
“w-what are you doing here?!”  
“i wanted to see you, as well as tell you-” Mrs. Nunez quickly walked over to them  
“Jim, please help me understand why this large troll is here. At the party. He said he knew you and was looking for you.”  
“okay, uh Mr and Mrs. Nunez, this is Draal, my, mate. That’s what trolls say when they’re together, he’s my husband, just to clarify”  
“this is your husband!? I imagined him to be a bit...smaller...and...more like us” Draal snorts and looks at her with annoyance  
“what is that supposed to mean?”  
“nothing, I’m just surprised is all. Now, that our party has a large troll. I’m sure everything will go smooth! Right Jim?”  
“uh...yeah...hey Draal, let’s go talk over here real fast” Jim pulled Draal’s hand along until the two were a decent distance from everyone else  
“what are you doing here?”  
“i wanted to visit you, as well as tell you good news”  
“what good news?”  
“my mother is coming to visit us! And she has a surprise!”  
“oookay that’s great, really It is, but why didn’t you just text me?”  
“because I wanted to deliver the good news in person. Now, when will you return with me?”  
“after the parties over”  
“which is when?”  
“i don’t know, a couple hours at most”  
“hm...that will not work. My mother said she will be arriving soon”  
“can’t you convince her to just, hold off?”  
“perhaps...but...she has made up her mind. Besides, the surprise she has is something we both want!”  
“what is It exactly?”  
“it’s a surprise, do you not remember how those work? I will contact my mother and tell her to hold off for a bit longer, this event means a lot to you so she will understand”  
“of course. Okay look, Draal, this party is really really important to Claire and her mother. Everything needs to be nice. And calm. Okay? Calm. Relaxed. Laid back.” Draal’s expression saddened and he looked down at the ground  
“oh….you do not wish me here...i understand”  
“look. You know how much I love you. I just …..i want you to do things with me, I just don’t think being here will be fun for you. Of course I want you with me! I just didn’t think you would want to be here. it’s literally just casual conversation and some light eating. Two things you don’t exactly….like”  
“hmm..i understand….if I behave myself properly, may I stay? I wish to be with you”  
“okay...okay big guy, I’m telling you, you’re not going to like it here, but I won’t push you away. Come on, why don’t you meet Claire’s parents properly. Remember, calm, casual. No talking about sex, or war, or fighting, or your weapon collection”  
“what is there to talk about?”  
“exactly why I didn’t think you would like this”  
“i will try for you” Jim caressed Draal’s face  
“thanks Draal”  
“you’re supposed to call me mate, remember? you’ve been forgetting”  
“alright, mate. let’s go show you to Claire’s parents.”

 

………………………………………………………………………..

“well, we met first in trollmarket when I first became trollhunter. we...fought...and well, drama happened. Then throughout the years we got close and then, we got married” Jim patted  
Draal’s arm with a smile. Mrs. Nunez smiled awkwardly and added  
“well, everyone has their type. As long as you’re happy I guess that’s all that matters” Claire came over in a huff  
“Mom, Jim, could you come help me with a certain person we all ‘know and love’.” the three walked off as Claire shared the details of Noten’s actions, or soon to be actions. Draal felt extremely awkward, just standing there not knowing what to say or do. This IS a very  
‘non monger don’t break everything and be loud and violent and if I don’t move maybe I won’t ruin anything so Jim will be happy and not be mad or upset with me for ruining his best friends mothers event’  
“So Mr. Draal, It’s nice to meet you” Mr. Nunez said breaking the ice. Draal tried to just stay still and simply say hello  
“my daughter and your husband get along great”  
“yes they do”  
“so what do you like to do for fun?”  
‘don’t say bashing others skulls in!’  
“i….erm….cannot say”  
“why not?”  
“it’s...not important”  
“okay, any hobbies you have?”  
‘don’t say collecting your enemies remains and presenting them to your mate for affection!’  
“none to really speak about”  
“well there must be something you do in your spare time”  
“i...do….but….Jim has requested me not to….speak of them”  
“oh really? Well he shouldn’t just tell you what you can and cannot do”  
“i wish to make him happy”  
“well talking about yourself wouldn’t ruin his happiness correct?”  
“i...suppose not….”  
“so then what do you like to do?”  
‘don’t say carnage don’t say carnage don’t say carnage!’  
“i like….c….a….’ Draal’s brain started to yell at him  
‘DON’T SAY CARNAGE!  
“to collect...pictures of kittens”  
‘NOOOO DON’T SAY. No wait! that’s good!’  
“oh? I didn’t take you for the soft loving type, so what kind is your favorite?”  
‘DON’T SAY YOU LIKE TO EAT THEM, well used to, BUT STILL’  
“i like to...e...a...”  
‘NOOOOO’  
“..entertain them”  
‘wait what?’  
“entertain kittens? How so?”  
‘well, I’m at a loss, you’re on your own’  
“by...pu”  
‘DO NOT SAY PUMMELING KITTENS!’  
“to pet them”  
‘WHEW. Okay back in business’

 

Mrs. Nunez came back to them, looked annoyed and holding a large assortment of food. Mr. Nunez saw this and shot the annoyed look back  
“ohhh no I am NOT cooking any of that crap!”  
“you will and you’ll like it. Hello again Draal”  
“yes hello ms nuz”  
“its Mrs. Nunez”  
“yes Mrs. nuz” Mr. Nunez reluctantly took the ‘food’ and started to cook it as he continued speaking  
“Draal and are talking about his hobbies” Mrs. Nunez smiled and added  
“well, that sounds nice, I suppose I should get to know you, seeing as I think we’re most likely going to be seeing one another frequently, so please go on about your hobbies  
“i collect weapons”  
‘NOOO WHY DID YOU SAY THAT?!’  
“weapons? Like swords?”  
“yes, along with flails, ax’s, maces, knifes, daggers, spears, crossbows, and any other object that can maim and slaughter”  
‘WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! Okay okay, run away, no wait! Say you have to use the restroom, then leave the party!’  
“ah, so, you like more...violent things. Everyone has their hobbies I suppose”  
“yes, fighting to the death in arenas are another hobby of mine, along with hunting down the biggest and most dangerous prey to slaughter and present them to my mate as a token of my devotion and affection”  
‘WHAT!?. Well. If I die at least I can be with my father in the void. Wait, the void only takes trollhunters. Would it include me? Oh no….what If I get separated from Jim! Maybe it’s like a plus one. Maybe I can be Jim’s since I was alive when my father fell...wait...then Jim would have to die first and or at the same time….’  
“oh well, that’s….very...classic”  
“forgive me ruining this conversation.”  
“it’s not ruined, so is this more of a troll life or...”  
“yes! My tribe are the mongers. Bred for combat and kill for pleasure. My tribe are the most feared out of all! The mongers do as they please without hesitation or restraint! Well, typically.”  
“ah...that’s….interesting. I’m somewhat surprised Jim is...with you. He seems so calm and rational NOT THAT I’M SAYING YOU AREN’T! I’m just making an observation”  
“yes. I tried many times to kill him when we first met. When we fought to the death he was supposed to slay me, however he spared my life. I became indebted to him for the rest of my life as I had lost my honor. I proved myself worthy once more, after the years have gone by we’ve killed many things. Then I mated him many time in his nest during his heat, proposed to become his mate, and the very next day I proved my worth to him by slaying 77 opponents in the arena!. My tribes customs say that when one proposes a courtship, any and all challengers are allowed to participate. Whoever is the one to survive receives the honor of being his mate. If I had died, Jim would have gotten a different mate. I was the only one still alive. I had bled for him and slaughtered to win his heart. Afterwards we carve into our flesh symbols of our eternal mate hood. The body heals and then allows it to be shown for all time. Then we have a massive celebration for a month, more drinking and fighting to be had for pleasure rather than sport.” Draal smiled thinking he had just earned their friendships. The two looked horrified. Draal mentally realized what he had just said.  
‘...uh oh….’

after a very awkwardly long silent pause Mrs. Nunez responded  
“oh….that’s….every culture has their….take...on marriage”  
“yes. When Jim falls in battle, I shall mourn for him for the rest of my life. I know in my heart Jim will do the same”  
“well it’s always...hard to loose a spouse….well it’s….best to move on eventually”  
“oh no. trolls mate for life. If a mate is killed, the other mourns for them for their entire existence”  
“well that’s...sweet..i believe I need to go now and check on the other party goers” Mrs. Nunez hurried as fast as she could. Draal looked to Mr. Nunez who went back to cooking. Draal just thought  
‘will Jim mourn for my death if he is the one to slay me?’

…………………………………………………….

Jim took a nice slow steady breath. He was helping to clean up the party. He heard what had happened. Thankfully Draal was silent the rest of the few hours, barely moving or talking. Jim really didn’t know what to think. He asked Draal not to do that, still he didn’t listen. Although he IS Draal, so should he be blamed for doing what he does like usual? Then again there is always a time and a place to act a certain way. Also to account for is the fact that he’s never been raised or taught this, if anything he was doing what was natural to him, he truly doesn’t know any better. Buuuuuuuuuuttttt Draal is supposed to be learning this stuff, over the many years of trying to teach him. Another thing to remember is that he IS trying his hardest, this isn’t easy for him, it’s never been. Jim took down a banner, folded it, and placed it into a box along with other ones. Draal was behind him, anxiously tapping his fingers together. Tiny clink noises were created from the stone and metal tapping together repeatedly. After the last one was taken down and put away, Jim turned to Draal.  
“Draal.” Draal swallowed and tried to remain calm  
“yes my mate?”  
“i asked you to do one thing. I know this isn’t easy for you. I know you’re trying your best. This is just how you are, this is how you’ve always been. This is just what trolls do and humans...well...typically don’t say things like that at these kinds of events. I want you to know that I’m not mad at you” Draal was in total shock. Jim placed a hand on his arm  
“I’m not”  
“truly?”  
“yep truly”  
“i am...disappointing to you though...”  
“no, not that either”  
“….nothing is….wrong?”  
“no. everything isn’t fine, but I’m not mad anything with you. You tried you best and that’s what matters. Yes it’s true that Claire’s parents are….they have...well….hmm…..they understand who you are now. They know what you like and how our relationship is. it’s always better to tell the truth than to lie, like you believe. Boasting like this isn’t really…..recommended when interacting with most people. If anyone asks in the future about us, just tone it down. don’t say you ‘had slain 77 people’ say something like, you proved your worth to me with your tribes customs. If anyone asks for you to explain more, just say that it is dangerous and it’s not something light to talk about”  
“i...understand. Thank you my mate, I swear I shall try even more to be a better mate”  
“you’re already trying your best, don’t push yourself, just grow and learn. you’re a lot better than when you used to be. It just takes time for self growth. Now, there’s plenty of garbage to eat, you wana dig in? Then after we can go and do that surprise you talked about” Draal’s expression lit up and the two made their way inside the home.

 

……………………………………………………………………

 

Finally, Draal and Jim came home. To see an irritated Ballustra tapping her foot on the ground out in front of the lake’s home, as well as Toby, Eli and Steve waiting with her.  
“finally! I’ve waited more than enough time for my sons to return!”  
“i am sorry mother. I wanted to support my mate”  
“i will let this go, only because you had the right intentions. Now then, I have surprises for the three of you!”  
“three of us? There is only two of us mother” Jim walked over to his three friends and hugged them. Toby wiggled his eyebrows and asked  
“sooo, how did the party go? Claire told me everything”  
“well, it went exactly as she said.”  
“well, I’m surprised Draal didn’t make more light conversation!”  
“ha. Ha.” Ballustra raised her voice and looked at them  
“the three of you, come!” the did as instructed, so now the five of them stood in front of the monger mother. She moved a large box from behind her out in front  
“for you my little fleshbag, I give you this. I made it myself” She opened the box and handed him a small pole  
“uh...thank you? I don’t know how to twirl a baton...”  
“HAHAH! SO AMUSING! Twist the handle at the bottom and press it inwards”  
“like th-AHAHHHHHH!”  
suddenly a GIANT FLAMING SWORD was created  
“a toy for my little fleshbag to play with! Like...hmm...a small dog with a new chew toy”  
“HASHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! IT’S SO LIGHT AND GIANT! LIKE SOMETHING OUT OF AN ANIME!”  
“what is an anme?” the others had to duck as Eli started to swing it around  
“NOW NO ONE WILL FUCK WITH ME! I NOW HAVE THE POWER OF TROLL WEAPONRY AND KNOWLEDGE OF ALL ANIME ON MY SIDE!” Toby elbowed Steve  
“top 10 most overpowered anime characters” Jim rubbed his horn and groaned  
“whyyyy did you give him that?”  
“i find it amusing my son!”  
“Eli...promise me you will only use that for good” Eli just laughed maniacally as he swung it around. Steve just rolled his eyes  
“ppffft what ever. The real weapon is between my legs.” Eli turned to him and smirked  
“oh good, you’ll bore your enemies to death” Toby gasped  
“OOOHHH SHIIITTTT” Steve went red faced, Ballustra and Draal were cracking up. Afterwards, Ballustra reached into the large box  
“for you my birth son, I have this” She pulled out a very fancy new arm. Metal and slick, monger light blue with small spikes jutting out of it here and there. Monger battle engravings twisted and stretched down and around the arm. It looked slightly more natural, but clearly still robotic.  
“i only had enough time to craft three fingers. I didn’t worry too much though, I assumed you were used to it by now” Draal took the arm, breathing heavily and shaking, tearing up  
“i...i...”  
“you’ve more than earned it. Plus, how am I supposed to look at you and be around you if I know THIS THING is on you. I will NOT allow my child to be using something so basic and childish. Look at it! it’s got hole shaped dents in it! Look how exposed the elbow is! Look how much of an eye sore it is! How you’ve managed to stand even wearing it is a mystery to me” Jim looked at her with kind eyes  
“thanks Ballustra-”  
“call me mother”  
“clearly Draal loves it-”  
“it’s more than perfect! Thank you mother!”  
“but maybe lighten up a little on Blinky’s design...he isn’t anywhere near your level and he tried his best”  
“clearly. And his best was not enough for my child. Now then, as for YOUR gift, it is a surprise for the both of you. Now, come! It awaits.”

 

“oh, where is it?”  
“in the nearest gyre.”  
“oookay, bye you guys. Steve, reign in your boyfriend. Toby, make sure Steve reigns in his boyfriend”  
“you got it Jimbo”

………………………………………………………………

Ballustra Draal and Jim walked to the large transportation device.  
“okay Ballustra-”  
“say mother. I don’t want to keep repeating myself.”  
“uh...mother”  
“see how hard that was?”  
“where’s our surprise”  
“patience.”  
“a monger. Having patience?”  
“you are a smart little thing aren’t you? Yes. Even we do, at times, and in our own way. You cannot rush cooling metal after all. Everything needs a certain amount of time. Thus we wait. We may not like it. But we do because we must. Now, my sons, get into it” the couple did as instructed, Ballustra started up their gyre and hopped in, she crancked a few things and BOOM! Suddenly they lurched forward and shot down the tunnel!. Tunnel after tunnel after tunnel until they stopped suddenly. Jim almost vomited, while Draal just shook it off  
“under a minute, hmm. Guess this might need a tune up, it should have arrived sooner. Well no matter. Come my children.”  
“where are we exactly?”  
“you will see” the three walked away and down a long hallway. There was a sudden and rapid cold in the air. Draal started to sniff at it  
“wait...is that...i remember this scent...” Ballustra looked back and smiled  
“you haven’t been here in a long long time my child.”  
“wait….are you...saying...” the three came out of the opening. The heavy sudden bright light blinded Jim, he blinked and rubbed his eyes. Suddenly he saw. A mountain, bigger than most, was in front of them. Fires blazed in fire pits, lining up to an entrance. Skulls on pikes littered the entrance and walkways. Very soothing clearly.  
“mother mother MOTHER THIS IS OUR HOME!” Jim sniffed around, only able to smell the cold which now bit at his ears and face  
“uh..where are we?”  
“welcome my son. This is the monger home. Our tribes home. Your home.”

……………………………………………………………

Draal was more than delighted. He looked and acted like a kid going to an amusement park.  
“i can not believe it! I’m home!”  
“Draal, our home is at our house”  
“call me mate. But this is OUR HOME! THE MONGER HOME!” suddenly a small shine sparkled through the air. Suddenly right next to them 5 spears dug themselves into the ground  
“HOLY FUCK!”  
“OUR GREETING! OUR HOME!”  
“THAT’S YOUR GREETING?!”  
“well, usually it’s a dozen ax’s, but I suppose this will do”  
“HOW DO YOU LIVE?!”  
“we are strong enough to survive! This is how we are allowed entrance. The weak die and therefore are not allowed within our home.”  
as they neared the entrance, huge skulls and bones were decorated around the entrance, in a very morbid yet somehow beautiful fashion. Everything even and polished. Spears jutted out of some of the largest skulls, making it look like teeth ready to dig into a fresh kill. Ballustra shouted in trollish  
“HAR, YOUR AIM IS OFF! YOU DIDN’T EVEN HIT US YOU WHELP!”a very large monger laughed deeply  
“i decided to give you a little show! I didn’t want to prevent you from coming in!”  
“you knew I was coming, well now I might not want to from that pathetic display!” the two rammed horns hard enough to where some snow fell off of some of the bones  
“wait, is that your whelp? Draal?”  
“yes it is!”  
“he’s gotten so big! Look at him! Oh, lost a limb? Oh you MUST tell me your story!”  
he rammed horns with Draal, who was ecstatic. Jim had a bit of trouble switching his brain from english to trollish, but he managed to finally do it  
“well well, what little whelp is this? A little omega! Well isn’t he a cutie!”  
“uh hi, I’m Jim, ni-” Jim dodged out of the way just in time as the large bull suddenly charged at him  
“why did you do that?”  
“WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!” Ballustra picked Jim up and patted the snow off of him roughly  
“forgive him. This whelp hardly knows our customs. Which is one of the reasons I brought him here. He is my son’s mate, they are new. Only about, nearly 6 months now”  
“what?! He had a courting without us?! Oh Jurl is going to be angry.”  
“that old man can throw a tantrum all he wants for all I care!”  
the two laughed heartily while Jim was just confused.  
“come! Come in from the cold! Fresh blood is waiting for you! Oh little whelp, you will learn, and love your new home”  
“thanks, but I live somewhere el-” Ballustra pushed him forward past the smiling guard.  
“whoa...” Jim looked outwards. A giant blood red heartstone, clung to the massive caverns ceiling. Shaped and cut to look almost like a spear going through a skull. A truly intimidating stalactite. Under it, massive caverns twisted and winded around, large craters filled with weapons and skulls, skins and meats. Many of them converted into arena’s with training instruments and set ups similar to the hero’s forge. Armor and shields decorated walls like scales on a fish. Massive blacksmith forges dotted the landscape, some as big as actual homes. The shops were all almost identical, and seemed to all be selling the exact same inventory of TVs, cats, skins from various creatures, some even Jim couldn’t identify, a LOT of assorted meats with lights above it to show which were which (one of which had a close resemblance to a human skull…). Crystal lights of all shapes, sizes, and colors lit up areas, while other areas were lit up purely by fire, making it almost seem like the lights from the crystals melted and their energies burned, or it could also be seen as fire so hot it solidified and became crystal. Mongers of all shapes and sizes walked around, many fighting and brawling, cheering and booing, others presenting various gifts and trading, some simply went about their business. A few whelps walked along with their parents, having their own small weapons/armor/shields. If you didn’t know any better, this entire fortress seemed to be a LIVING ARSENAL. The scent of blood was strong enough in the air, you could always smell it lightly, no matter where you went......


	15. Monger madness pt 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A meeting with an old man. a difficult choice. a feast!. 
> 
> and Eu! who's that troll over there?
> 
> fuckin nerd

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i LOVE these next few chapters. i really want to write these wonderfully! 
> 
> the monger madness chapters are gonna be fuuun! i hope my readers enjoy them!
> 
> i just suuuper love to write! (type, you get what i mean) it's so fun! and also helps my stress. anyways, enjoy!

….Draal was sniffling  
“this...is almost exactly how I remember it….i wish father were here to see our home one final time” Ballustra sighed through her nose and blinked away tears.  
“i do too son. He had the honorable death of a trollhunter. Many will understand.” She looked to Jim who was still awestruck and somewhat afraid of going down below.  
“come my little whelp, it is time you met your new tribe”

The three made their way down, ascending a darker shaded crystal staircase. The sounds almost were too loud for Jim’s ears, causing them to ring a tiny bit. Draal might have been loud, but he was quiet compared to his kin. The scent of smoke and fire filled the air, almost masking all others. The same scent of blood always strong enough to smell faintly, the smell of surprisingly well cooked meat made wafted around, making Jim hungry, only to be hit by something horribly foul smelling, it made his gut churn.  
“what...is...that….smell”  
“ah, it’s lunch time. Night stalker stew. A monger special”  
“what...is it?” Draal cleared his throat  
“my mate, I do not think you would wish to know”  
“yeah I think I want to stay in the dark with that.” as they passed by, a large monger bull looked at Jim  
“ooohh that omega’s pretty” another spoke up  
“he smells pretty too”  
“i saw him first!”  
“bushigal! I did!” and suddenly they fought. Draal pulled Jim in close and nuzzled him  
“you are mine. I won you fair and square~”  
“i know you did big guy, I won’t let anyone else try anything” walking around, Jim saw the sights and smelled the smells! Everything seemed to be similar no matter where he looked. Mongers really didn’t have much of a culture…

“so uh, Ball-mother...where are we going?”  
“to see the old man”  
“who?”  
“Jurl. The old bull memorizes every monger. Their name, personality, where they live, where they come from, who their family is, what adventures they’ve had, what they look like, what they smell like, what they taste like-”  
“taste?”  
“you will see. And do not interrupt me! What they feel like, what they sound like, how much pain tolerance they have, what weapon they prefer, along with armor and shields, what their title is-”  
“title?”  
“what did I JUST SAY. Yes, Ballustra the smith, Draal the deadly, Kanjigar the courageous, and so on. EVERY monger earns their title by some feat. It doesn’t have to always be killing. It could be cooking or cleaning or crafting or breeding or loudest or largest or healer or magic user and so on. Where was I...oh yes, what there plan for the future is, what feats they wish to accomplish, what their emotions are like, mongers do not cry, and we are not quick to show emotions, but everyone needs to have aid in stress and trauma, helping them understand and deal with something in a healthy manner. Yes you may ask the question you clearly have”  
“i thought mongers loved fighting and everything, your scars are your history and all that stuff”  
“yes, but that doesn’t mean we simply ‘get over’ things at times. Like when your mate dies, it is nothing like shrugging off a blow or a cut. You need help, you need to learn how to grieve properly so you are not haunted for the rest of your life in constant pain. Even mongers have their limits.”  
“like how I helped you?”  
“yes. I will always be thankful for that. I have lost my love, but I have my son, and gained you. You are both in my life now, never forget that, as I will not. Ah, here we are. Lot move your lazy ass! we’re here to see the old man!”  
“Ballustra? I thought you left! Good to see our greatest smith return home. We were worried we wouldn’t get your work anymore!”  
“like I would stay away. you’re all nothing without me!” the two rammed horns and laughed.  
“who’s this little thing? Ohh a pretty little omega. someone’s going to have a large courting. How fertile is he?”  
“that is something they do not wish to discuss”  
“what?!”  
“my thoughts exactly. Now, let us through, the old man needs to see him” Lot grunted and let them pass.

 

Jim gasped yet again in awe. The trollmarket heartstone had such a warm, calming glow to it, so soothing and relaxing. Like you could live peacefully for the rest of your days. This one. This one made you want to fight. It made you excited and eager. Like you couldn’t just sit around and be lazy. You wanted to fight! Get moving! Get active! Do something that involved blood!  
“OLD MAN, COME OUT!” Ballustra shouted. The three came into a very large room, Vendel’s was filled with tools and books, this one was much like it, except with more weapons and blacksmiths tools. Jim didn’t see anyone. Then suddenly behind a desk a massive figure rose up. The biggest monger Jim’s ever seen! He was almost double Ballustras size! Spikes so large, they looked like over sized stone spears jutting out of his back, all sharpened to a fine point. Horns so large, it was almost hard to view all of them at once. Like two huge uprooted stone trees. arm’s almost as thick and large as a car. His chest covered with so many tattoos, they seemed to almost just be his skin texture. His eyes seemed almost like molten gold with silver pupils. His nose piercing was large enough to use as a car’s tire. All over his body were scars, some simple, to some looking horrible, almost fatal even. His voice boomed and echoed through the hearstone in a deep tone it almost made Jim’s body vibrate  
“so. Our Ballustra has come home. With her whelp and….hmmm...who is this now?” Ballustra smacked Jim’s back hard enough to make him go forward  
“ow. Hi I’m Ji-” Jurl took a long deep inhale into Jim’s chest, then licked him, soaking his entire body in monger saliva.  
“ew!”

 

“hmm….you’re not any breed of troll I know of. And I know all of them. You smell and tastes of human soaps, you dress as one too. Your hands have different numbers on them which no other troll has, your fur is softer than most but more coarse than human hair. You shape it to be identical and have softer troll features. Your blood smells that of a human with a small mixture of trolls. Your taste tells me you live in a modern city setting surrounded primarily of humans on the surface yet you are commonly exposed to many trolls at times. You smell and taste like you know how to sweat, meaning you know how to move and fight. You are active almost everyday and are exposed to various stones, metals, and fire. Your body tells me you train in an arena similar to ours however it is only a single one that you have started to master and you tend to be physically involved with fighting trolls rather than humans but you still have fights with them, not as severely but you still do. You aren’t married to most weapons or armor but you have abilities to wield one specific set that is lightweight and powerful that is unique to one you. Crafted and shaped differently than all other materials and styles. You have fought in difficult battles and overcomes stressful situations. You started out as a small vulnerable and weak whelp but then trained until one very specific event forced you into doing something no one else has done that granted you new capabilities.

 

You are also mates with Draal and breed vigorously and quiet commonly, at least once a day. You are very fertile but you take a medicine that prevents you from bearing whelps. You are usually only surrounded by a small group of others around your age who are human, 7 of them to be exact, two of which are mates. Both of them are the only alpha and omega of your group other than Draal as well as you. Your mother is softer than most and tends to care for others however she hasn’t been in your life a lot due to her being a medical professional who is needed frequently. She is mated to an impure, them as well as you and Draal all live within the same household which is a human one. Your oldest friend is around you a generous amount of time and lives close by you two have grown up around one another since you were whelps. He has no parents but a single individual who helps tend to him, he has 9 cats who belong to the individual but are helped taken care of by your friend. you’ve gone to human schools your entire life and continue to do so along with your group of friends. You also try to intake as much of Draal’s semen as you can, out of pleasure and choice rather than need. You two have almost been mated for roughly 6 months on the human calendar. You come from trollmarket and are there just as often as the surface. You prefer a specific brand of candy that is common on the surface and where you come from. You and your oldest friend enjoy it the most out of your group.”

Jim was slack jawed. He simply didn’t know how to feel or what to think. Within a single moment of introduction, his entire life was explained.  
“ugh some of it got in my mouth….h-how did….you…...know all that?!”  
“by your taste and scent”  
“you knew all that...FROM MY TASTE AND SMELL?!”  
“yes. There is little I do not know of. I have mastered my senses to the point where even the smallest detail is revealed to me. You would be surprised on how many tiny details each have their own unique flavor and scent. Bodies are a story, I have mastered the ways to the point where I can read them like one would a book. From the collective details, I can piece together your life. Even for years. Your body always keeps it’s history, no matter how forgotten. Everything lasts forever in one way or another. I do not know the future if you are about to ask that question, for you have yet to experience it, to have it add to your bodies history. Now then child. Tell me of who you are”  
“you kinda just figured it all out!”  
“i do not know who YOU are though.”  
“okay….uh...I’m...Jim...uh….”  
“hm. Perhaps it would be easier for you to explain it later. For now, come! We must celebrate!”  
“what exactly are we celebrating?”  
“the return of Ballustra! As well as her son and his new mate!”  
“Come my sons, let the old man plan everything. My surprise will finally be shown to you.”

………………………………………………………..

The three now stood in a large cave with many rooms.  
“listen my son’s. The old man has allowed me to let you have this cave. Welcome to your new home.” Draal gasped and walked around slowly  
“this is...AMAZING!”  
“only the best for my son’s.”  
“SO MUCH SPACE! OH OH I CAN PUT MY COLLECTION OVER THERE AND MY WEAPONS OVER THERE AND-WE HAVE OUR OWN FORGE?! THIS ROOM CAN HAVE A HUGE NEST MY MATE! YOU CAN TRULY BUILD TO YOUR HEARTS CONTENT! OH THIS ROOM OVER HERE IS PERFECT FOR OUR WHELP! OVER HERE IS WHERE WE CAN HAVE OUR OWN INDOOR PLUMPING!-” Draal ran around admiring everything, already planning in his head where everything could go, how everything would be decorated, how big things can be without taking up all the space. Meanwhile Jim is hesitant about everything. Turning to Ballustra he questioned  
“what do you mean our new home?”  
“it is as simple as that. What is so hard for you to understand?”  
“well...uh...we’re going to...move..here?”  
“yes. That should be obvious.”  
“our home is in Arcadia though. Not here”  
“which is why you’re here now my son. This is your new home. This is where you belong. You are our blood, our tribe.”  
“well I’m not actually a monger though...”  
“no. but I will vouch for you, you will become an honorary one, and one no less”  
“i...”  
“look how happy Draal is. Do you truly wish to take this away from him?”  
“no...i...want him to be happy but...i can’t just leave my family and friends and school and well...my life behind!”  
“i never said you had to stay here. You may go back and forth as much as you’d like”  
“but I’ll be living here from now on”  
“yes”  
“i-” Draal ran over with the most Joy Jim’s seen, only rivaled by that of when they first courted  
“this is wonderful! Perfect! Oh our lives will be amazing!”  
“yeah...they….will be...”  
“what is the matter my mate?”  
“i….us moving here...” it finally started to dawn onto Draal. He was thinking of himself, not his mate.  
“oh...i...got excited...if you don’t want to live here I….will understand...”  
“Draal I want you to be happy, you want this clearly”  
“but you do NOT want this. I should have considered your feelings. I cannot just force you to bring your entire life here, abandon your friends and family. I should have known better.” Draal huffed and looked miserable. He stared at the ground and started to walk out of the entrance to the cave  
“Draal. I….i want us both to be happy. If we chose, only one of us will be...well….fully. You want this, I want Arcadia.”  
“we will stay in Arcadia, that is where our true home is”  
“you were, are, still so happy to be here though”  
“and your entire life is there. So is mine. I left our home centuries ago, my home was in trollmarket, it is now within our home on the surface. I can tell the monger tribes home is...too much for you to get used to. “  
“i could get used to it. I’ve never lived with trolls before…..and you haven’t been here in so long....i...let me think about it, okay? it’s not a yes. But it’s not a no either...” Draal gave a sad smile, clearly torn, which made Jim feel even worse.  
“i will do whatever you chose for us. No matter what, I will be happy with either.” Jim was about to speak up again, until a troll ran up to them  
“It is time! Ohhh such a pretty omega….back to what I was saying, it is time!”  
“for what?”  
“the celebration!”

………...……………………………………………….  
Once again, Jim was speechless. It seemed like an entire section of the market place was cleared out. Table after table after table, with skulls and crystal décor all around. So many seats set down all around. It all was rounded like everyone would sit at a play or theater or the like, almost everything facing towards the center, the largest long table. At the very front of it, there were a few seats, and all the way down lined even more seats. Jim was suddenly grabbed and placed in one by none other than Jurl  
“sit there little omega, next to me. Next to you will be your mate. And on my right side will be Ballustra. You are the guest of honor, while the other two are the returning.”  
“returning?”  
“yes, to return. Our blood typically never leaves our home unless we set out to do something. When the feat is accomplished, no matter how small, as long as it is worth our time, we celebrate!. Now then, you get yourself comfortable, we shall begin in mere moments.”  
“is...is EVERY monger here?!”  
“more or less. We are blood. We share with one another, we help one another, we kill one another, we mate one another, we are together in everything”  
“loyalty really is big here”  
“yes, it is at our top priorities, almost next to killing. For both sport and reason”  
“i was told Gunmar invaded this place, to take kids away to train them in his armies”  
“he TRIED to invade! Yes, that was his intention, however they hardly stepped foot in our territory! Within the half hour he came, we had slain half of his troops while hardly any losses of our own, and we drove them back!. To watch that warlord retreat. We all mocked and laughed at him. He had his pride ruined, shattered like glass, and his embarrassment spread to almost every troll kingdom. He had swore vengeance on us for making a fool out of him. Well, we openly challenge and mock him to fight us once more! To this day we await for him to return so we may make a fool out of him once more!”  
“uh...that’s….not possible...you can’t do that”  
“do you question our strength?”  
“nononoon! it’s just-” a loud horn and drums were sounded  
“we will speak of your ‘wording’ soon enough. Now, it is time to start!”

…………………………………………………………

The mongers had practically swarmed into the seats, they surprisingly had no where near the amount of trolls in trollmarket, however that place was the hub of most places, so it made sense. The mongers still had their numbers, a terrifying amount. Everyone did say they feared the monger tribe, the only reason the others could breath easy, was because they never left their home, except for those who leave to accomplish that which they set out to do. If the mongers ever tried to invade and conquer, it would be a nasty war. Surprisingly, the mongers were pretty friendly and open to other tribes, IF they could prove they were worthy of their time and efforts. Almost no traders or visitors came here, the ones who did had plenty of scars to show for it, those that did, proved themselves good enough to enter and go as they please. After a few moments, the mongers, surprisingly, became silent. Jurl spoke up, his voice echoed and was very clear to everyone.  
“blood. Kin. Tribe. Family. We are here, gathered to celebrate two things. The first, the return of our beloved Ballustra” the mongers cheered and roared in approval  
“her son, Draal” far less, but plenty still  
“and for the second reason for celebrating, is a small troll, strange and foreign, even to me.” the mongers whispered and clearly were surprised at this. Their leader knew pretty much EVERYTHING. Which was made very clear. So how did HE not know?! He always knew everything at all times!.  
“yes, I share your disbelief. Which just shows me, there is still more out there to learn and understand. Something I am eager to do. Toh stop picking on Eu. Now then to return to my reason. This whelp, this strange foreign creature, is our guest of honor. He has proven himself to be worthy to us! Ballustra as the judge! She even vouches for him!” many gasped and whispered. Jim leaned over to Draal and asked in a whisper  
“why is your mom so famous?”  
“she is known well to all for her skill as our greatest blacksmith, as well as being the mate to the trollhunter. Something very very very few ever have the honor of being throughout trollhunter history, thus she is known about well to all. She has more than once proved who she is and her title to all. Her feats are great, her history will be told by all. She has a lot of power here, in the sense of those who will listen to her, so her saying you are worthy, Is a very massive honor and something everyone will know. You will be quite famous, well, that and being the-” the two paid attention and stopped talking as they noticed Jurl was looking at him. He turned his head and went back to speaking

“his name is Jim!….hmm….what is your title”  
“uh...i don’t...have one?” Draal whispered to him  
“your title is the trollhuner.”  
“okay….uh, my title is the trollhunter” all gasped and murmured, even Jurl was shocked  
“truly? This is not something to jest about. Prove yourself now or be forever shamed.” Jim stood up and raised the amulet, high above his head to show proof. Everyone gasped loudly and then went dead silent. Draal whispered  
“summon your weapon and armor” Jim nodded and did so. Everyone was still silent and shocked. After a surprisingly uncomfortable silence, Jim just cleared his throat  
“yeah...Jim the trollhunter….woo….uh….” Jurl said with a sad tone  
“then our trollhunter. Our kin. Our blood. Our tribe. Has lost Kanjigar.” another long silence. Jim wanted to say something but wasn’t sure what to say.  
“Ballustra, how long has this been?”  
“years apparently. I only recently found out. I was planning on explaining it, but I think Jim should.”  
“me?”  
“yes. Explain what you said. Your story. Your adventures. Explain about Gunmar.” all others gasped and murmured once more.  
“okay well...uh….it started out when Kanjigar...well...ya...then...uh...okay, so….and you’re not gonna believe me. But I was….human” no one spoke or made a noise. Jurl was heavily shocked, as if he just learned his whole life was a lie  
“yeah...so...turned half troll...uh...let me explain about Gunmar and...well me….”

…………………………………………………………..

after the long story, all were silent. Then suddenly started to boo loudly  
“uh...sorry?” Jurl turned to him  
“whelp. You did what we’ve all wanted to do. Everyone wanted to be the title of the Gunmar slayer. Now you hold two titles. Well, no matter. Being human, hm?, strange. No wonder I couldn’t place you. Which means...” Ballustra actually stood up and spoke  
“silence and listen all!” her voice, silenced everyone almost as suddenly as she finished.  
“this whelp. Turned to our kind. Tribe less, no other family to share! Other than his human mother and...the other. Our new trollhunter. Out of ALL the other tribes. He has agreed to join ours! Another Monger trollhunter!” they all applauded and cheered. Jim leaned over to Draal  
“why are they so happy I chose you guys?”  
“because we’ve only ever had one monger. Having another is a great honor. Even if you are not blood. Which is another reason, out of all the tribes, you who could chose any, you chose us. A trollhunter who chose us out of all others!. You are one of us. You were already going to be well known, now, all will make sure to know you. All will befriend and challenge you to the death. You may say no, however your reputation will be hurt, along with your honor. You may be able to get away with it, since you do not share our blood, however the opposite can occur, you chose us, meaning you are supposed to live like us, and you refusing to do so, well. It isn’t good.” Jurl looked at the two again, then went back to speaking

“he does not share our blood. Remember that. We shall be kinder and more gentle to him. He is our trollhunter. We may NOT kill him. Especially since he now represents us! Why would we kill the one who WISHES this! Why reject a gift given to us!? We shall care for him, teach him, and have him grow along with us.” Jurl turned to the two and winked.  
“now then, another thing that is of our trollhunter. He is mated. To none other than Draal the deadly! He now holds the title of mate to the trollhunter!” EVERYONE suddenly booed.  
“yes, yes I know I know, he had his courting event elsewhere. Something that SHOULDN’T have occurred.” Jurl looked in anger at Draal, who lowered his head in shame.  
“however, due to the unique situation this all is, I shall forgive it. Many of you would have gladly died to be his mate, I’ve no doubt, however Jim chose Draal after his victory, thus we shall hold true this courtship. Our first omega trollhunter. And a hybrid as well. Truly unique, and we now OWN THIS FOR OUR TRIBE!” everyone cheered and clapped in approval. Once again, another lean in  
“why is this a big deal?”  
“because of the situation. None others get to have this privilege, this is the one and only time to ever happen, WE get to have it, no one else does. It is like a prize, a trophy, that we have just received. It will forever be in OUR history, none others.”  
“Let us treat our new tribe member, our new blood, our new kin, our new trollhunter, our new monger, with our respect and love! Let us fight with him and die with him! Let us allow him into our lives! He is one of us, now and forever! Now, let us feast!”

………………………………………………………………..

Jim almost wanted to vomit. Between the rancid smell of the food, to the feasting, to the fighting. The food, was something Ballustra would have wished to cook. Many horrid things that looked and smelled like they crawled out of sewage and then somehow had a violent transformation into some unknown new species of animal crossed with an insect. The fighting was just that, the Mongers joyfully fought over the food. If you wanted something on your plate, you took it. If someone else wanted the same thing, you fought for it like two rabid dogs over a bone. The meat still had some blood on it, quite LITERALLY a fresh kill. Draal seemed to be a master at being well mannered at the dinner table compared to everyone else. The glug looked and smelled the strongest Jim’s ever encountered. Jim did want to eat SOMETHING, but he really didn’t feel like having a limb ripped off trying to take something, also trying to find SOMETHING he could eat. Sure yeah, he can eat ‘trollfood’ but even this made his stomach churn. Some mongers had the job of passing out new plates of food, it was more like tossing food into the fight though. Jim politely asked for water and something ‘easy’ like some kind of meat the seemed remotely edible by human standards. A monger gave him what he asked for alright. The water smelled...off...and The meat looked and smelled a bit too much like a person would….  
“uh...do you guys...eat people?” Jim yelled out through the noise. Jurl looked down at him mid bite, he swallowed  
“what’s people?”  
“you know, people, humans, fleshbags”  
“ohhhhh. Hehe...try it and find out.”  
“is there any...just...basic steak...like from a cow?” Jurl rolled his eyes and made made a gesture, signaling someone over to give him what he asked for.  
“there my trollhunter whelp. Enjoy”  
“this isn’t cooked...uh...i..could get ill from this”  
“ill? From this basic of foods?”  
“humans are easily able to get ill from, pretty much everything. We need things sanitized and clean, along with properly cooked”  
“are humans REALLY that needy?” Ballustra yelled through a bite yes. Jurl grumbled something. Then said  
“very well. I suppose we shall make accommodations for you. You simply tell me what you need, and I will make sure it happens. Ironically, I know so much, yet I know so little about humans. I haven’t even seen a living human in centuries”  
“living?”  
“yes”  
“okay, uh...yeah I’m gonna need a lot of things”  
“explain them to me later, for now. Enjoy your cooked and properly made food” Jurl said with a slight tone of annoyance. He waved another plate over, this time a very tasty smelling and looking steak. Jim noticed that...there was no silverware.  
“you don’t...use forks and spoons do you?”  
“whats this?”  
“I’ll show you later.”  
“you’ve got your claws. you’ve got your fangs. That is all you need. Now dig in before it gets cold! Or snatched up! Ohhh look dessert!” at that moment, plates of the after dinner treats came out. Somehow even being worse than the regular food. A few plates were given to Jim, a ‘thank you’ for choosing us gesture. Jim tried to swallow down his stomach.  
“my mate..are you...going to eat that?” Jim looked over to a feeding frenzy looking Draal  
“no go ah-” Jim couldn’t even finished before Draal yanked the plates over and went to town. Jim sighed, he ate his steak and finished quickly, he really didn’t want to stay around the feasting anymore than he had to.  
“Hey uh, Jurl?”  
“hm?” He replied with a mouthful  
“where’s the bathroom?”  
“hm?”  
“you know, the toilet”  
“hm?”  
“the place you go to ‘relieve’ yourself”  
“mmmmmmh. Mhm.” He swallowed down and nodded. He waved someone over and told them to take Jim to the ‘bathroom’.

 

Once again, Jim was mortified. The ‘bathroom’ was nothing more than a dug out sewage pipe slowly cleaning it’s contents out… Jim was thankful he only had to pee. He got out as quickly as he could. Pretty much the entire shopping distract was abandoned, it was very strange. So alien now, the quiet and stillness. It seemed weirdly relaxing in its own way. The warmth from the forges and fires, the cooling breeze coming in from the massive holes in the ceiling, occasionally dropping snowflakes, although they evaporated almost as quickly as they fell. The quiet little noises that made a relaxing atmosphere. Little clinks and ticks, little steam puffs here and there, the sizzle of metal cooling. The sounds of the fire crackling brought back memories of camping with his friends and mom. The market was filthy though. Trash was littered everywhere, loose dirt was kicked up, the stones all had rough scratches and imprints from the constant travel over them, the various vendor stalls all seemed to be crafted from torn pieces of cloths or fabrics, like someone put them through a shredder and poorly stitched it back up again. Jim walked along the market, looking around, it was actually nice. It really did show how the mongers lived, their personality and brutality but crafted into something of their very own. Underneath the threatening weapons and armor, were beings who lived their own lives. Those that had family, those that had children, those that had jobs, those that simply went about. Jim was actually surprised he didn’t see any socks or human cloths, usually trolls LOVED them. Jim just assumed it was because they didn’t make much contact to the outside world. They did say mongers hardly ever left, and they had practically no traders. No wonder they have little knowledge of the outside world. This place, it was their own world. Jim looked around at the various crafts, from the weaponry, to the armor, to actual cloths and leathers, to some sort of monger affection jewelry, crafted from bone and metals and crystals. Some stalls sold digging equipment, along with building materials. Jim did remember that troll alphas made and altered their caves if their mates were going to have a whelp. 

Jim stopped at one stall, it was an omegas accessories one. Various things from nesting materials to some sort of, what Jim assumed to be, monger decorations. Surprisingly not made out of bone, but carved from wood, polished and made smooth. Jim had a voice in the back of his head telling him that he KNEW Draal would practically buy everything from here, among a lot of other vendors no doubt. Various statues of the past trollhunters were carved finely from various materials. Jim wondered if he would get his own eventually. He knew for CERTAIN that Draal would buy a TON of them. Most likely to keep for himself, but then he would hand them out to practically everyone in a polite gesture. With a hidden message underneath of ‘respect your new trollhunter by putting this out in display on a nice clear easily to view area! DO IT OR ELSE’ Suddenly Jim’s phone buzzed with a message. He was SHOCKED that his phone worked all the way out here! He was a bit afraid that the charges might be immense from wherever he was. He was even more surprised when he had full bars! AND WiFi! He actually clicked on one named  
‘Mongerz rul3!’ it was open and he connected. Suddenly a messaged popped up on his phone in a newly made chat

E. “wooow! Someone clicked on thissss!”  
J. “uh, hello?”  
E. “HEYY! FINALLY SOMEONE TO TALK TOOO!”  
J. “hi?”  
E. “hello! =D”  
J. “where are you?”  
E. “where are YOU!? =D”  
J. “are you a troll or a human?”  
E. “troll. U?”  
J. “both ;)”  
E. “=O are you Jim?”  
J. “yeah! how’d you know?”  
E. “how do I NOT KNOW! you’re literally the only thing anyone’s talking about! Apparently you’re hot af! Both good lookin AND badass!”  
J. “good to know”  
E. “how did you get on here?! I’m like, LITERALLY the ONLY one on here!”  
J. “well, phone buzzed, saw a text, realized I had full service, and then connected”  
E. “finally someone else who uses a phone! I’m like, the ONLY monger who uses one!”  
J. “why is that?”  
E. “no one here cares about tech or the outside world really. I do!!! it’s so cool! don’t get me wrong, I LOVE our people and our shin dig. Buuut it gets duuuulllll around here! I’m guessing you kinda figured out how everything’s on repeat.”  
J. “yeah, I see strong similarities everywhere”  
E. “i set this up like, 2 years ago, hoping SOMEONE would get on! But nooooo. everyone’s too much of a jock around here to wana figure out how to do anything tech wise. Finally tho, someone to talk too! Where u at?”  
J. “in the market place”  
E. “whhaaaa?!?! you not at your own party?”  
J. “i was but it’s sorta….overwhelming”  
E. “yeah, the very few people who managed to survive our hello say the same thing. Well, welcome! can’t wait to meet you! Omfg! I’m already such a fanboy XD”  
J. “where you at?”  
E. “well I WAS at the feast, then I kinda got pushed out of the way. I’m kinda a smaller monger, so I kinda get pushed around a lot. Idk, I never was super interested in bashing other things skulls in. I mean I AM but not as much as everyone else. So, I heard about humans and them having awesome shiz like this! So here I am! I left for a bit, explored some places with in them humanz! Got this awesome stuff! Set it up and here I am! Sorry if I’m on repeat”  
J. “it’s fine! I’m really not much of a pushing people out of the way type”  
E. “gonna h8 it here then”

 

J. “it can’t be all THAT bad”  
E. “=/”  
J. “oh come on! I’m here to see the sights!”  
E. “you see one of the bajillion swords? Well you’ve seen the sights”  
J. “Well you know me, what’s your name?”  
E. “terrible.”  
J. “hi terrible!”  
E. “haha! I’m happy I can actually make jokes with someone!!! but seriously, it’s dumb. Even for a trolls name.”  
J. “wut is it?”  
E. “its….Eu”  
J. “like ew?”  
E. “yeah...=/”  
J. “well, at least it’s simple!”  
E. “Eu the weak they call me. Eu the simple. Eu the pushover. You name it.”  
J. “well, that sucks, I was picked on a lot when I was younger”  
E. “lucky you, you haven’t been picked on for 400 years at least”  
J. “felt like it to me, but I’m not comparing myself to you!”,  
E. “it’s okay, I get it. so anyways, where you live? That sounds creepy huh?”  
J. “Arcaida, in California”  
E. “neat! isn’t trollmarket around there?”  
J. “yee!”  
E. “=O I wana go! But I can’t work the gyre and everyone picks on me for being too small to start it up. Plusssss I get super sick suuuper easily. So here I am, scrolling through cat pics and memes”  
J. “well, a memeless life is no life at all”  
E. “=D. okay but like, you ARE the Jim rite? you’re not just trollin the troll”  
J. “nope! I am totally Jim!”  
E. “pics plz? Or is that too creepy...”  
J. ‘upload pic of Jim giving a peace sign with his camera’  
E. “WOWOWOWO! IT REALLY IS YOUUU! =DDDD”  
J. “yee!”  
E. “so...uh...whatcha wana talk about?! I’m down for ANYTHING! Ur the ONLY outside thing to even talk to me since I set this up!!! there Is a human city a bit away, and I’m trying to make friends online buuutt I suc.”  
J. “don’t put yourself down so much. I was in your exact place when I was your age….uh….like...when I was younger”  
E. “i guess compared to humans, I’m like...18? I dunno.”  
J. “cool”  
E. “so you and Draal huh? He is big and tough, nothing like me. Ur lucky you have someone, I’m happy for you!”  
J. “you don’t have anyone?”  
E. “pffft you kidin me! Im a weak noob who sucks at everything! Except this! Literally just talkin online!.”  
J. “well is there anyone you like?”  
E. “uh...well….maybe….but...I’m just sum super small weak alpha. Everyone mocks me and says I should be a beta...”

 

J. “well that’s okay, status isn’t everything”  
E. “=/ sound like my mom. Buuut it IS the trollhunter so =D”  
J. “so, who’s the omega of your heart? Not mocking! Just curios”  
E. “hes this really cute omega….hes gentle and quiet even for a monger!”  
J. “ohh, sounds like ur type”  
E. “HA! All the strong dudes hit on him all the time! He isn’t even courted cause he doesn’t know what he wants to do with his life yet”  
J. “why don’t you talk to him?”  
E. “he is like, 200 times outta my legggg!”  
J. “well, I really liked Draal and he really liked me, we talked after years of us doing stuff together, then one heat later, poof we’re married”  
E. “i wish I knew what a heat felt like...uhh that’s creepy huh?  
J. “eh, you have no contact with anyone else, I know someone exactly like you”  
E. “really who?!”  
J. “this little omega human named Eli”  
E. “human? Hmm...so...uh...is he...”  
J. “single? No hes dating this guy named Steve”  
E. “oh! Ppfft not single! I meant like, a nerd. But I mean...i..don’t think...id mind a human..I’d take anyone at this point”  
J. “well, I don’t have any human or troll friends who are single/omega. Why not just go over to the guy you like a say hi? Worse case is he doesn’t say hi back”  
E. “noo! Everyone will beat me up for it! ‘Eu trying to be an alpha! Looser!’ ugh.”  
J. “whats he look like?”  
E. “i...have a few pictures...that’s...creepy huh?”  
J. “depends on why and when you took them”  
E. “it was sorta...far away...I’m a creep...well, I was doing this mini vblog thing I tried, just talking about monger stuff, trying to see if anyone was interested in talking to one online, then I took a few pics and he ended up in one. I cropped it...uh...here”

 

E. ‘pic sent’  
J. “he’s cute”  
E. “=/ yeah...”  
J. “well, want some advice from an omega?”  
E. “=0 oh shitz I forgot you was one! I’M TALKING TO AN OMEGA AHHHHH!!!”  
J. “=) well, not sure about monger omegas, but cute things are always nice. Little statue would be nice to give”  
E. “and? What if someone sees me try to give him something and one of the others beats me up! It is allowed here u know.”  
J. “well, you never know unless you try”  
E. “hes like 1000000% out of my league! I don’t even have 1!”  
J. “i bet you're better than you think”  
E. “I’m not all big and buff! A monger is supposed too! Well, maybe not omegas, but stilll!!!”  
J. “wana meet? Lemme check you out myself. I can help”  
E. “========OOOOOOOO ME MEET AN OMEGA?! ANNNDD THE TROLLHUNTER?!?!?! NOOO WAAYY!. This isn’t a joke right?”  
J. “nope! Were u at rn?”  
E. “at home...”  
J. “you wana meet somewhere in specific?”  
E. “uh...there is this one place we can meet...its outta the way..”  
J. “i don’t mind. I do wana see this place, learn it and all that. Ohhh you could be my tour guide!”  
E. “AHHHHH! IF I GOT TO HELP YOU I WOULD BE SUUPER COOOL!!! AND IF SOMEONE SAW US HANGING OUTTT!!!!”  
J. “from one past looser to a current one, lemme help you. Uhh that sounds mean, srry”  
E. “nah I totally understand! okay okay we can meet at this blood fountain!….yes its literally what its name is...tastes good! Uh….you might not like it...uh...anyways so yeah. Just go down the market and you’ll see it. Its kinda a long walk but all the market streets lead to it. Ill be the awkward looser sitting down  
J. “cant wait!”

 

So, Jim walked! It took a few minutes but he was there. Well, Jim didn’t know what to expect. It was like any other fountain that you would find in a mall or a park, except it had blood instead of water. A single lonely troll was drinking out of it in cupped hands  
“hey, you Eu?” The troll spat out his mouthful and smiled  
“w-w-wow i-i-it i-is y-you!” Eu was like a miniature version of Draal. If Draal were a king sized candy bar, Eu was a mini fun sized one. He was still bigger than Jim though. His horns weren’t that grown, along with his back spikes. He had some tattoos around his body, but they were very simple. He had a messenger bag with a hard briefcase strapped to his side on a leather strip going across his body from his right shoulder to the left side of his kilt.. He had some pockets instead of skulls on his kilt.  
“hey”  
“wow...it’s you...” Eu was awestruck, just staring at Jim  
“yep!”  
“c-c-can I have an auto graph...in trollish please...uh...nvm that’s weird..”  
“nah, uh got a pen-okay you do, alright. I don’t really have a signature, soooo...from me to you, stay cool Eu, your trollhunter, Jim.”  
“wow! Oh this is sooo cooool!”  
“well it’s nice to meet a fan”  
“wow...look at you….an omega...I’m talking to an omega! Wow you look soooo pretty...and you smell sooo pretty too...uh...that’s...weird...”  
“a little, but I really don’t mind”  
“wow...you’re just so….amazing...”  
“thanks!”  
“wow….”  
“it’s nice to meet someone I can talk to that isn’t about violence”  
“RIGHT?! LIKE FINALLY?! So uh...yeah….uh...this...never mind..”  
“what is it?”  
“i...this is weird….to ask...”  
“go ahead”  
“can...i...touch...you?...I’ve never touched an omega before...”  
“sure”  
“r-really?!”  
“yeah” Eu nervously reached a hand out to Jim, he started to touch and pet him, causing Jim to purr in delight  
“woooww! you’re sooo soft and you’re purring! Wow!”  
“mmmhmmm that feels nice”  
“wow…..oh wait! I-I’m sorry...Draal’s going to get mad I touched you! Oh no oh no! I don’t wana die! Please please please don’t say anything! I’ll do anything!”  
“relax! it’s okay! you’re not doing anything terrible to me. If Draal asks, I’ll just tell him I let you and that’s it, which is the truth, he won’t get mad, you’re not hitting on me”  
“wow….you’re just so...amazing….wow”  
“thanks, I really never get compliments like this”  
“but you’ve done so much! I heard your whole story! you’re so amazing! Wow….uh...s-sorry I keep saying that...”  
“nah It’s fine. So Eu, whatcha wana do?”  
“y-you m-mean l-like...spend...time...with...me? Hangout?!”

 

“sure! The feast is going and I doubt they’ll notice I’m gone. And I don’t want to go back, so why not! You said you would be my tour guide, so guide away!”  
“wow….you’re so amazing...i….I’m sorry if I’m being weird….you’re just….the very first omega I’ve ever met, or even seen up close! Plus you’re THE trollhunter!! this is the best day of my life!”  
“how old are you?”  
“401. I know, I’m lame”  
“I’m only 21”  
“well yeah but you’re a human! Well..ish….”  
“true, but you still have a lot of growing to do, you’re going to be a good monger”  
“gee, thanks mom...but if YOU say it, it might really be real! Not just a parent thing!”  
“exactly! You might be like this right now, but you won’t be in the future”  
“i hope so….i...i hate my body...”  
“don’t say that”  
“it’s true! Look at me! I’m tiny!”  
“you’re really not that small”  
“yeah for any other troll! But a monger my size can’t do anything!”  
“you could talk to an omega”  
“even if I DID somehow do that, there’s NO WAY I could court”  
“why not?”  
“are you kidding me?! I would DIE! I haven’t ever even FOUGHT ANYONE! Well, I haven’t won! I’m too afraid of getting hurt, I’m like the exact OPPOSITE of a monger.”  
“well, even if that were true-”  
“which it is”  
“-you can do things the others can’t”  
“like what?”  
“well, like you know computer stuff!”  
“just like...basic stuff...”  
“buuut does anyone else know anything?”  
“no”  
“well there you go! Eu the intelligent!”  
“huh...i...like that...”  
“and you don’t HAVE to be about fighting to get your title!”  
“that’s...true...”  
“annnd once you’ve earned one, no one can take that away from you”  
“you can if you’re banished. It never happens because no one is dumb enough to do anything to piss the old man off. Other people can just mock you too. Like others used to say Draal the dim...WAIT I’M SORRY, PLEASE DON’T TELL HIM I SAID THAT!”  
“i won’t it’s okay”  
“you’re so amazing”  
“so, walk me around?”  
“sure!”

So, Eu was the tour guide! Not much, everything was repetitive, but each thing had it’s own history.  
“-and over there was when everyone cheered as jua was having sex with his mate. Over there is when ga had sex with her mate. Over there is where faer had sex with his mate”  
“lot of sex on this street”  
“oh yeah TONS! Its like, THE PLACE to get laid”  
“you’ve been on the internet a lot huh?”  
“yee! Is it the way I talk and act that give it away?”  
“yee!”  
“um...w...what’s….this is kinda personal...”  
“no one’s around Eu, go ahead”  
“what’s...sex like?”  
“hmm, hard to explain. Well, I’m assuming you’ve masturbated”  
“oh yeah tons like allll the time. Internet porn is THE BEST”  
“yeah it is!”  
“soooo many omegas to look at!”  
“wow, and I thought human young guys were horny”  
“oh mongers are horny ALL THE TIME. Fighting and plowing are kinda equal around here”  
“yeah, I have sex with Draal at least once a day”  
“lucky...i would love to-uh...never mind..”  
“you would love to have sex with me?”  
“YES CAN WE?!”  
“nooo”  
“oh uh...please don’t tell Draal!”  
“i won’t, anyways like I was saying, sex is hard to describe, it’s like two people masturbating each other in different ways”  
“i wish I could breed an omega...ugh I’m such a perv...I’m sorry for talking this way”  
“nah it’s fine, that’s just how mongers are. Always loving to boast about their sex life, how potent they are, how great at it, etc.”  
“so...what...do heats feel like?”  
“like your body can only think of sex, you’re kinda drunk on it too”  
“wow...i...i wish one day I can have my own omega...i would love him sooo much! I would take care of him and love him and breed him and...well you get my point”

 

“so, first things first. I’m going to hangout with you and you’re going to show me around and we make sure everyone sees the two of us hanging out. Second, I help you get an omega”  
“wow really?! For both!?”  
“yes”  
“WOW! YOU’RE SO AMAZING! Wait….i...i don’t want Draal mad at me for being near you so much! He can kill me so easily! he’s the son of Ballustra AND Kanjigar AND has trained his whole life, which most others do, but he’s doing it even more than others! he’s like, THE MONGER! And he’s always breeding you! he’s getting to have sex with YOU! THE TROLLHUNTER! EVERYONE envy's him! And see him as a TRUE monger! The total opposite of me! Ugh he’s so macho and alphay and strong and big and amazing! I wish I was like him...”  
“you can be”  
“pppffft no”  
“just gotta train like I did”  
“I’m afraid of pain! And I’m not exactly made for combat!” Behind them they hear a voice  
“you are A MONGER! You CAN be trained. You ARE bred for combat!”  
“AHHHHHH IT’S DRAAL!” Eu yelled and hid behind Jim  
“who is this small alpha? And why does he whine and complain?”  
“not nice mate. Draal this is Eu, a small, timid, alpha who wants to be big and strong and cool and loved and not picked on. He also wants a mate”  
“this? This is an alpha?”  
“not nice mate.” Draal came over to them and sniffed at Eu  
“hm...guess so….i was born big, but I trained and became THE MONGER as you stated.”  
“how long were you listening?”  
“a small amount. Jim left during our feast. I thought you would have returned from the toilets shortly after, when you didn’t I began to worry. So I set out to search for you. Was fairly easy. Then I listened to your conversation as I approached” Eu whispered  
“wow he’s so big and macho”  
“thank you Eu.”  
“wow….Draal the dim became Draal the deadly and you did all that stuff and..well...you don’t need me to tell you your own story” Jim pulled Eu forwards, now having him by his side  
“Draal-mate, you and I are going to start training Eu”’  
“w-what?! M-my trollhunter, please no!”  
“call me Jim”  
“wow….a first name biases!...and no way I can train with him or you!”  
“you can and you will. Eu, between Draal and myself, we’re going to help you achieve your dreams. don’t worry, I’ll make sure we’re easy on you”


	16. Holiday cheer! (don't drink it)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fun with the holidays! a very special drink also (don't drink it) a nice day of christmas eve with everyone! a lovely fun horrible disaster riddled day! and holiday ham too!
> 
> Draal that's not......that gift...uh......
> 
> ENJOY! MERRY CHRISTMAS!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY DONE! Christmas is over BUT i wanted to try and put this out as fast as i could! i was going to do this a lot earlier, but holidays are busy and jam packed with stuff to do. this was the final 'holiday writing' project i had to do! wooo I hope you enjoy it =D

Jim was humming a bit and working on a cute ‘project’ on Draal for the Christmas spirit!  
He was finishing up with the little touches

(haha, get it? Cause he’s finishing it up and he’s doing it by touching it? Eh whatever you don’t have any taste in humor if you didn’t find that funny. Yeah that’s right, I’m calling you out! You mad about it? Well are you? Mad during the holiday season? Yeah I bet you are! What, you wana throw down? I’ll fuck you up bitch! I got a nasty right hook and I’m not afraid to whip it out! Take your shirt off! I don’t want to get blood on it. what’s wrong? Too scared? I don’t care if blood will stain it or not! that’s your own fault you wore a light color today! You should have been prepared at all times to get into a fight! You never know what’s behind the corner and oh no! Suddenly you get stabbed! You should have prepared for death! Death is always an option! I’m not afraid to die! You can’t hurt someone who’s got nothing left to loose! You should have prepared a will like I have! No one gets anything! Only my ghost does! Yeah that’s right, I’m going to keep everything! Ohhhh suddenly I’M the greedy one? Well guess who’s about to haunt your ass? ME!. You know I’m gonna spooky the shit out of you! Ooops, guess who just knocked over that vase? ME! Oh no, look who slammed the window shut, oh wait you can’t see me CAUSE I’M A GHOST! Oh fuck, wait what if you can? wouldn’t that make you a psychic? Ohhh fuuuck that would be cool to be one! See the future and shit. Actually I wouldn't want to be able to see ghosts, I don’t want to constantly see dead people all the time. Now THAT is scary. I don’t need some weird ass Victorian lady scaring the shit out of me while I’m trying to walk down my god dam hallway. Do you ever wonder if WE’RE the ghosts? Every time we move or do something it somehow affects another world. Where was I going with this? 

I lost track. Anyways the holidays are stressful and I guess I’m just lashing out my own anger onto you. My husband just got me a car and I lost it by parking somewhere I forgot, okay I never had a husband, I was just trying to impress you. Why? I guess cause I truly am lonely in this world. Do you ever wonder about space? Like, what’s out there? It must get lonely. Speaking of lonely did you ever watch that one movie where those two guys literally try to kill a child and said child plans and builds things that is a straight up child version of the saw movies? Not only that but he takes pleasure when they writhe in pain. ALSO he could have ONLY CALLED THE COPS but nooooo he decides to just watch two grown men suffer in multiple ways and enjoys it. LITERALLY branding a guy and enjoying it! He makes sure they’re aware that he’s about to cut the rope, smiling as he sees the pure fear in their eyes. Then cuts it and potentially could have killed them even though they landed in snow. Not to mention the cuts and burns and blunt trauma to the head and potential spine shattering! Maybe something caused him to slowly snap on the inside. Being tormented by his other siblings, being ignored by his parents, not having any friends. By the way he was strangely good at somehow building perfectly working ‘people’, like he’s had experience in doing it before, maybe to silence the inner demons slowly churning inside of him and growing his potential hate for others, only to have the flames fanned and rise as those two men who tried to rob the house are tortured in the various ways he created. Anyways I’m sorry for wanting to throw down, I don’t want to fight, I just wanted the attention. I don’t have many friends and for some reason I thought that if we both were sent to the hospital it would somehow make for a funny story and we end up going on adventures in life and then we fall in love after realizing we’re each others soul mates, then while one of us (probably me) is on their death bed holding hands and whispering out one ‘come closer. Closer. Closer’ then 

WHAM SUCKER PUNCH! THAT’S RIGHT. IT WAS ALLLL A RUSE! I TRICKED YOU AND NOW YOU CAN’T WIN THE FIGHT CAUSE I JUST WHOPPED YOUR ASS AND WENT TO THE GRAVE. YOU NEED TO LIVE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE KNOWING THAT SOMEONE HIT YOU RIGHT BEFORE THEY DIED. I GOT THE LAST LAUGH FUCKER! can’t do anything now! I guess unless you die, and then our ghosts can fight for the rest of eternity. Can a ghost die? Would they become a super ghost? Can ghosts haunt other ghosts? Like what happened to that Victorian lady who haunted me, is she like, gonna just hangout with me now? Maybe we find someplace and just kinda chill and haunt people together. Would you get jealous that I’m giving her attention instead of fighting you? Wow, you shouldn’t be jealous, that’s SO like you! Ohhh now it’s MY fault for wanting to have friends?! Aww don’t leave! Come on, let’s just talk okay? Remember that one evening on the lake. We watched those geese fuck and the sunlight was beautiful. We went out to dinner and laughed, then we went home and we burned it down for the insurance money. We DID get away with it, oh fuck wait if someone was doing a reading, could they hear us? Ohhh fuuck now we’re in deep shit! I can’t fucking go to prison for doing that! Okay, calm down, I know what we can do. let’s fake our own deaths-wait shit we’re already dead. What if they have ghost lawyers?! If you rat me out I WILL take you down with me! I won’t go quietly, I’ll kick your ass and make you a super ghost!.

Oh wait I was writing a holiday special fanfiction wasn’t I? Why didn’t you tell me I was suppose to focus! YOU’RE the reader! You should have said something! Well it’s too late now, this shit’s written in stone. Well, at least we have those memories together. Speaking of holiday, do you like eggnog? I LOVE eggnog! Have you tried it with almond milk? it’s alright, it just tastes like almond in milk. I honestly don’t know what I expected, it LITERALLY SAYS what it is. Well, maybe it could have been one of those things that SAY it is, but then taste differently! Oh fuck I got off task again, and once again YOU didn’t say anything! it’s sooo like you to just ignore me isn’t it?! Well maybe I should just stop and go watch the grinch with Jim Carrey in it. Did you hear how he drove his makeup artist insane?! Like holy fuck! Then again, if I had to spend sooo long getting my makeup done, I guess I wouldn’t be happy either. But like, don’t be a dick to the person just doing their job! Unless that persons a dick then, I don’t know. Treat others how you wish to be treated, but then what if you’re a dick to someone else accidentally, then THEY’RE one to someone else, and eventually it’s like pay it forward but with everyone being terrible to everyone else. Well this shit spiraled out of control.

Anyways here’s Wonderwall)

 

“aaannndd just a liiitttlllleee mooorreeee”  
“you’ve said that 5 minutes ago.”  
“and you moved and messed it up. Now hush and sit still. I’m almost done. Hmm, hand me that tape. Thank youuuu. Now for the biggest, now just the tip…..okay! All finished! OH WAIT! Oonne final touch!. There! Perfect!” Jim looked back and enjoyed his work. Each of Draal’s horns were wrapped in garland, and taped on to hold It in place. Within it, little Christmas lights were tucked in nicely, having their own little batteries, allowing them to be turned on whenever! And for the final touch, a mistletoe tied onto the tip of Draal’s larger horn. Jim smiled, enjoying the finished project.   
“okay big guy, here, look in the mirror! What do you think?”  
“what have you put around my horns? And why do they light up?”  
“little lights! Annndd it’s called garland. See that little plant with the red berries?”  
“yes” Jim kissed with a loving warm fuzzy feeling  
“that is called a mistletoe. Whenever two people are underneath it, they usually have to kiss”  
“kiss? How does this small plant have the properties to cause others to kiss?”  
“no no, it just is a sorta of...tradition. it’s just a cute fun thing to do. Ooohhh time for onnne last thing!”  
“you’ve said that about all of this! I’m tired of sitting here”  
“well, you can stand. I just have to go get it” Jim ran off upstairs. Draal got up off the ground and groaned a bit. He looked in the mirror and touched what the strange decorations were around his horns, unsure how to feel about it.

“here we go!” Draal was suddenly embraced and felt something soft wrap around him.  
“since you can’t wear regular shirts, we had to improvise a bit” wrapped around his arms, waist, and neck, was none other than an ugly sweater!. Worn like a breastplate.  
“What is THIS now?!”  
“it’s an ugly sweater! it’s sorta another tradition. You wear one and it’s fun!”  
“i find no amusement out of this”  
“well. Let me get mine! we’re going to wear cute ones!”  
“how can this be cute and ugly?”  
“things CAN be! Like those weird little dogs. Anyways I’ll be right back!”  
“ugh. Fine. Only for you.” once again Jim ran upstairs. Draal poked and shifted his new sweater, again, unsure how to feel about it.  
“okay here’s mine!”  
“it looks the same”  
“Exactly! Exceptttt” Jim went next to Draal and put his large arm over Jim’s shoulder  
“see!”  
“See what?”  
“we both have reindeer on them! Except they’re facing each other and it looks like they’re kissing!”  
“oh yes, I see it now. Is everything about kissing this holiday?”  
“yeeesss! Get used to it big guy! Haha well, no it’s not, just some stuff! Oh and by the way, you DON’T HAVE to kiss whoever is under the mistletoe. So you only have to kiss me if you want”  
“do I have to kiss you every time you come near me?”  
“no not every time, unless you want to. I know you might not fully enjoy everything. This IS your first time. Buuut I have something fun I KNOW you’ll love!”  
“what is it?”  
“you can to swing you ax and kill something!”  
“oHHHh I love it already!”  
“it’s a tree though”  
“hmm...not nearly as exciting..hardly even..”  
“but you get to chop it down for us! Youuuu get to provide for our family!”  
“hmm...i do like the sound of that”  
“so, you and I have the job of going to get a christmas tree! A real one! Since we can take a gyre someplace where they grow, you bring you ax, you help me find the perfect one, we bring it home and set it up!”  
“hmm...that sounds...enjoyable...provide for you and select what you’d love most AND use my ax today….alright...let’s do it”  
“good. Okay, let’s take off our sweaters”  
“put you just put them mine on”  
“oh hush, it’ll only take a second to get off. We don’t want tree sap to get on them and ruin them!”

…………………………………………………………..

 

“Wow it is FREEZING OUT HERE!” Jim shouted as he shivered from the intense cold. Even with being heavily bundled, the cold still seeped into his bones. Meanwhile Draal was happy, going tree to tree looking around, the biggest smile on his face! He was going to provide only the GREATEST tree! The two were far far away from any civilization deep in the woods in a very frozen place.   
“THIS ONE! THIS IS THE ONLY GREATEST HOLIDAY TREE!”   
“uhh….” in front of them stood a MASSIVE tree. It was one, if not THE biggest tree around.  
“yes...yes! I shall-”  
“no! Dr-mate. You have to remember, we can’t have this one”  
“why not? Does it not please you? Then THAT one will due”  
“no!”  
“what’s wrong? Are my selections not good?”  
“no, they’re great! it’s just...mate...you have to remember, these won’t fit inside the house”  
“oh...oh...ooohhhhhh…..sorry”  
“it’s alright. Now, let’s look around for one that WILL fit inside”  
“ohhhh okay! Forgive me, I wanted to only provide the greatest and best! For that is the ONLY thing worthy of you!”  
“that’s super sweet and I love it, but we can’t fit it”  
“then I shall find only the GREATEST one that will fit!”  
“that sounds perfect, just remember, it also has to fit in the gyre”  
“why?”  
“because, it’s the only way to get home”  
“oh….YES THEN I SHALL FIND THE PERFECT ONE TO FIT INTO BOTH!” After walking, well Draal running around almost with too much excitement, they finally found the perfect tree. Round and healthy, grown perfectly, and the perfect size to fit! Draal was a little too happy chopping it down with his ax, then roaring out in victory, the massive roar echoed throughout the land, making it louder. Then the ground shook as a small avalanche happened  
“uh oh...”

………………………………………………………

“DECK THE HALLS WIT BRANDY, RUM, AND WHISKEY, FALALALALA DRINK IT UP!” Noten sang, horribly, while stirring a large bowl of eggnog.  
“TIME TO GIT THINGS SUPER LIT! FALALALALALALALALA! TIME TO GIT THIS PARTY STARTED! FALALALALALALALALA! TIME TO GET OUR ASSESS WASTED LALALALALALAL! NOW THIS NEEDS A LITTLE COCAINE! FALALALALALALA!” Claire ran downstairs to see a horrid mess of a kitchen.   
“what are you DOING!?”  
“ayyyeeee sis! Come get a taste!”  
“did I just hear you say cocaine!?”  
“yeee!”  
“are you putting it IN the eggnog?!”  
“yeee!”  
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”  
“uhhh it’s pretty clear. Anyways, come git a liiiittttle taste! A little holiday cheer!”  
“I AM NOT DOING COCAINE!”  
“okay fine! I won’t add it! Fun killer.”  
“WHERE DID YOU EVEN GET-i don’t want to know. Why are there so many empty bottles!? Are you spiking the eggnog?”   
“sis. Look me in the eyes. Right here. Right in me peepers. Complete attention to them. Now, are you REALLY askin me if I’m spiking this?”  
“you’re right, what am I doing? WHAT are you spiking it with!?”  
“that a girl! don’t worrryyy, I’m just adding a little fun! Hence the bottles. I promise, no cocaine. I swear on me love for this family!”  
“okay, then I know you’re serious then. You know, mom is NOT going to allow that here.”  
“don’t worry! This place is gonna be a snooze fest! I’m going over to the lakes for their little shin dig. I WAS gonna go to this other party where things. Get. Crazy!. I’m talkin violence and party animals and actual animals and orgies and grave sand and music and it’s a wonderful life movie screening-”  
“okay whoa. Also how does THAT match the theme?!”  
“well, when we all get tuckered out, we like to enjoy something easy. Plus it helps us appreciate what we all got goin on”  
“okay. At least it’s a good intention. So if this party is the greatest, why aren’t you going?”  
“it’s not happin this year! I know, it’s a living nightmare! Long story short, Jessy couldn’t get the building rented and the reindeer shipped”  
“uh, like, ACTUAL reindeer?”  
“you know it! I told you, there was animals! don’t worry, worst we do to em is look, pet, and feed them carrots, oh and cabbage. It gives the room the right Feng shui”

………………………………………………………………

Steve waited impatiently on Eli’s bed. Tossing a ball in the air while he occasionally glanced at his boyfriend rushing around and getting things prepared  
“can we gooooo noooooowww! you’re worse than my mom!”  
“I need to prepare everything!”  
“you’ve been doing that for a half hour now!”  
“well, you COULD be helping instead of laying there being lazy”  
“hey I’m resting from all the amazing stuff I did this morning!”  
“Having morning sex then showering is NOT something that calls for resting”  
“well I mean, I WAS amazing”  
“maybe you were maybe you weren’t”  
“hahahaa. Funny. At a certain point I do get tired of you joking about how terrible at stuff I am, especially to our friends! Jim never complains about Draal!”  
“yes he does hush! Alright fine, I’ll ease it up, just for you. I’m still making jokes though”  
“then I get to make jokes about you!”  
“we both know that’s not going to slide”  
“oh? And why not?”  
“I’ll be passive aggressive”  
“I’m fine with that”  
“and complain about how messy you are!”  
“you already always do!”  
“and I’ll withhold sex.”  
“haha...very funny…...OKAY FINE! Geez.”  
“i have you by the blonde balls. Now get up and help!”  
“why are you packing 5 jackets?! we’re LITERALLY just going outside for like, 5 minutes to ride over to Jim’s place on my ve-”  
“It’s going to be cold out!”  
“and then we’ll be inside the entire time! Where it’s warm!”  
“I am like, never warm! Look at me! You think this body retains heat?”  
“okay yeah you’re almost always cold. Finnneee! What do you want me to go”  
“first, go pack the presents. I just finished organizing them by size shape and name. I put them by the front door”  
“geez how many did you pack?!”  
“one for Claire, Toby, Jim and Draal, I got them a fun couples gift-”  
“is it handcuffs and lube?”

 

“NO! It is NOT handcuffs and lube! Besides Jim and I can’t find any that would fit Jim. It’s a romantic gift!”  
“like flowers and shit?”  
“nooo! Its-stop wasting time and go pack!”  
“fiinneeee!” they heard Eli’s mom call from downstairs   
“Elijah Leslie Pepperjack you better have your door open up there!”  
“it is. Mom.”  
“you know I don’t want it closed with him here!”  
“i know. You tell me every time now. For years.”  
“i support your relationship and think Steve’s a fine young man but people your age and below make mistakes all the time and I don’t want you to suddenly have a kid and not be able to support them and yourselves!”  
“I’m not going to have a kid. You know this.”  
“You can never be too careful!” Steve chuckled and quietly said  
“i wonder how different you’d be if she didn’t constantly drill that into your head all the time”  
“you hush! MOM WE’RE ABOUT TO LEAVE OKAY”  
“how?”  
“On Steve’s Vespa”  
“you mean that death machine?”  
“it is NOT one of those mom.”  
“it’s almost like a motorcycle!”  
“It is NOT! And even if it was, it’s a Vespa, it’s the gayest motorcycle”  
“you’d better wear a helmet”  
“i always do! Stop nagging me!”  
“Elijah Leslie Pepperjack don’t you raise your tone and disrespect me like that!”  
“I’m sorry mom, I know you’re worried but Steve’s a good driver and has been for years now”  
“don’t forget to bundle up! You know how easy you get sick. Okay I’m leaving, goodbye sweetie have fun!” Eli turned to a smirking Steve  
“Well, we can check your mom talking to us like this off the daily list”  
“Not funny”  
“kinda is”  
………………………………………………………….

“Don’t you look marvelous!” Blinky announced in Joy, looking at Arrrg’s santa outfit. The attempt at dying his beard white (which just caused a weird splotchy green color), a red cape sewn together with various fabric swatches, a large santa-ish belt around one arm, almost bracelet like, and to finish it all off, a little santa hat on one of his horns. Blinky’s outfit was a strange attempt at a helper for santa, a mixture of an elf and santa’s outfit.   
“thanks, you too” Blinky called out  
“alright time to depart, Dictatious well return later!” to which he replied  
“oh goody, leaving a poor old blind troll to fend for himself. No it’s alright, I know my way around trollmarket well enough”  
“you complain about our company, and you complain about us leaving, is there ANYTHING you WON’T complain about?”  
“not at all, you know it’s one of my favorite things to do.”  
“i can detect sarcasm in your voice however I know for a FACT that you’re speaking truthfully”  
“It’s alright, I can tend to my own needs, I’m sure I won’t trip and fall into a chasm”  
“At least we wouldn’t have to hear you complain”  
“Oh, it’s alright if you think of your brother as nothing but a burden, if I one day vanished I doubt you would even notice”  
“FIRST OF ALL YOU DID BACK AT THE KILLA-never mind! Take care of yourself! You have the knowledge to do so! You know where everything is! Arrrg, let’s depart. I have the sudden need to be around our family”  
“oh that’s fine, I guess I’m not good enough to be what you would consider family”  
“WOULD YOU BE QUIET! Arrrg, grab your large sack and let’s leave.”  
“i hope that’s not a euphemism dear brother.”

…………………………………………... 

Barbara had finished cleaning up the mess a certain son and his husband left behind. Walt was in charge of getting food and whatever was needed to cook. Jim was going to be the one to cook, Barbara offered, but everyone, except Draal, heavily implied that they didn’t want her to. Finally! Everything spotless! Not a stain in sight! The lights are all on, the decorations perfect! Everything in order and neat!. Well, when you live with a troll, it doesn’t last very long. Those few brief minutes were amazing. Usually the messy storm comes and goes, they always clean up, but Draal is who he is, oh well, he makes sure to clean up after himself!.

Draal burst through the door doing a victory roar. He carried the tree, it knocked everything down, everything broke and dislodged, everything just became a true ruin.   
“WHERE SHALL I PLACE OUR TREE TROPHY!?”  
“oh...uh...over in that corner-CAREFUL! Yes, nice and gentle, now hold it while it’s in the clamps. Now let me just adjust it into place...okay. All set! Sure is a lovely tre-what happened?!” she finally looks at Draal and Jim who were just CLOAKED in snow.  
“Draal caused an...avalanche…..we’re okay, just cold...and tired...at least I am...i can’t feel my horns” Barbara smiled through a small sigh, she looked at everything that was once beautiful and pristine, now demolished by the pure disaster that is Draal. She started to brush and comb snow out of her son’s fur  
“well, let’s get you both warmed up. I’m more than sure you’d like to”  
“you got that right”  
“no NO NO JIM-” Too late. Jim shook himself like a dog, his mind now telling him to do it naturally.  
“oops! I..uh...”  
“It’s alright. You go shower and get warmed up, I’ll clean up the sno-wow there is a LOT of pine needles”  
“oh..yeah...he really did storm through here..”  
“well he’s our Draal”  
“Wouldn’t want him any other way” the two shared a smile then heard a small defeated sigh behind them from the kitchen  
“and here I thought everything would-oh what am I saying, I knew this was going to happen anyways. Oh well, time to start over, again” Walt looked at the mess of snow, needles, and the once wonderful decorations, all mixed together like a festival slushy.

……………………………………………………….

‘knock knock knock’ Toby stood in front of the lakes home, chilly from the weather, excited to get inside. Jim opened the door  
“Hi! Merry christmas eve!”  
“you too!” the best friends hugged and went inside, Toby whistled as he noticed the storm that happened, and that Jim was freezing cold.  
“sooo, wana fill me in?”  
“short story. Draal and I went to get a tree. Went to this place waay out in the wilderness and snow. Draal found the perfect one, roared in victory, caused and avalanche, then made his way through here”  
“wonder, oh Draal”  
“right?”  
“the perfect troll husband. Trusband!”  
“ohhh I like that”  
“oh, here! it’s not much but it’s a little something I thought you’d love”  
“a coupon for buy one get one free of equal or lower price canned pineapples. Aww thanks!”  
“I’m kidding, here this is for you, honestly wasn’t sure what to get Draal so….just pretend it’s for the both of you or whatever”  
“no problem” Toby took off his jacket, said hello to everyone and witnessed the perfect tree  
“it’s nice”  
“IT IS NOT NICE! IT IS THE GREATEST!”  
“okay okay! Sorry Draal, it truly is the greatest, ohh I love the stuff on your horns”  
“I’m growing fond of it as well”  
“so, when are you guys going to decorate it?”  
“decorate?”  
“yeah! You put a bunch of stuff on the tree! it’s fun! BUT IT’S THINGS LIKE tinsel, lights, ornaments, candy canes, and stuff like that”  
“hmmmmm...I need to think on this….”   
“So Tobes, Nana leave already?”  
“yeah, she didn’t want to miss anything, so she took off, never seen her this excited all year” Nana and some of her friends meet up on christmas eve, spend the day together and ‘go wild’ doing whatever old ladies do together. Last year she took a bunch of singles with her, Toby didn’t want to ask or even think as to why. Toby’s phone buzzed, he checked it and was a mixture of confused and shocked  
“uhhh Jim”  
“yes?”  
“Blinky just texted me”  
“oh cool, when are they coming over? Blinky said they have a surprise for us”  
“i don’t know...cause he just said Arrrg is stuck in a chimney”  
“what?”  
“yeah!”  
“what chimney?!”  
“he didn’t say!”  
“no one here, or anywhere close by has a chimney!”  
“i know!  
“well where are they?”  
“he won’t tell me! He doesn’t want to ruin the surprise!”  
“well how do we help?!”  
“i don’t know!” the entire time this is happening, Draal is just staring at them, having no idea what to make of this  
“Okay, Tobes, tell them that-”  
“oh wait, he just ‘gave me a hint’ so I don’t ruin this for anyone else. He doesn’t want ANYONE else to know, apparently it’s bad enough that I’ll know”  
“okay, you go help them, I’ll stay and try to...well...fix all this”  
“sounds goo-” the door is suddenly kicked open slightly  
“WHAT’S UP FUCKERS!!!”

………………………………………………………………

“aaaaannndd done! Me old fashioned holiday cheer is ready to party!” Noten says proudly at the HUGE bowl that he’s made  
“great! Now behave! I don’t want to hear how you somehow caught their house on fire”  
“ayyee that was ONE TIME! And it only lasted a minute sis!”  
“STILL!”  
“i paid for the damages and everything was fixed the next day!”  
“true. But you’re still not allowed to have lighters. Or matches. Or any kind of fire starter”  
“yea. I know. How am I supposed to teach our lil baby brother about-”  
“okay DON’T teach him about ANYTHING that involves fire!”  
“Don’t worry! I take precautions! No way he could get hurt”  
“still!. Alright go have fun, don’t drive home drunk. Again. d-”  
“that was one time!”  
“four times! you’re lucky you only drive your little car”  
“the pussy crusher is more than just a little car! And alright, no drinkin and drivin for lil ol me. I’ll get a ride home”  
“good. Where was I? Oh yeah, Don’t cause a huge mess-”  
“well then where’s the fun?”  
“-Don’t break anything-”  
“I can replace it. I have connections.”  
“-Don’t sexually harass a coat hanger-”  
“THAT was one time! And I didn’t sexually harass it, only flirted.”  
“why exactly?”  
“i was piss drunk and thought it was some tall hottie”  
“anyways, don’t be annoying-”  
“I’m always the life of the party! How am I annoying?”  
“-Don’t ruin anything! Am I forgetting anything?”  
“if you do, don’t worry! I’ll be on me best behavior!”  
“Alright, mom’s party is about to start, get going”  
“tryin to throw me out into the cold lonely streets? On christmas eve no less! I thought I was loved more than that...”  
“stop acting like-whatever, you know what I mean, I love you blah blah, now scoot!”  
“well, I was thinkin, mind if I get a lil teloport there? Saves me gas!”  
“you don’t use gas, it’s electricity”  
“still!”  
“no”  
“whaaaa come on sis!”  
“no”  
“why not?”  
“cause I need to help mom, and I can’t use my time to find my shadow staff, open it up and then send you there”  
“you’re just bein lazy aren’t ya?”  
“yes actually, I am. PLUS I want to make SURE you don’t get drunk and try to drive. Think of this as a test”  
“okay fine! I’ll play your lil game. Alright, wana help me get this holiday cheer ready to go?”  
“no, I need to help mom”  
“ugh! I gotta do everythin by myself”  
“your choice to make this, your responsibility”  
“guess I just take up more time, doubt I can pack this and the gifts all in me car allll before the party people come”  
“ugh! Okay you’re right. let’s hurry. And make sure not to forget my gifts”

……………………………………………………………..

Noten parked near the garage, nice at the side and a little behind a tree. He didn’t want to get his shit stolen! The pussy crusher is WAY to bad ass not to! He took a couple presents into his arms, both almost, if not already, as big as he was. He couldn’t figure out how to jump up to press the doorbell, or knock with his arms full. So why not just kick in the door?  
“WHAT’S UP FUCKERS!!!” Walt looked slightly annoyed, but also he expected this kind of behavior from him, he shouldn’t be surprised.   
“oh good, it’s Noten”   
“AYYEE WALT!”  
“yes, hello to you too”  
“MERRY FUCKIN CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! LET’S GET THIS SHIT LIT!. where’s the tree so I can dump this crap? Ohhh ain’t she a beut! Wow there’s a lot of snow and pine needles and glass shards everywhere, geez this your idea of party décor?” Toby looked back at his phone  
“okay I gotta go, I’ll be back soon”  
“awww I just got here ton of fun!”  
“rude.”  
“how you gonna get where you’re goin? Not the must fit”  
“Draal can you kick him?”  
“AYE NO! STAY AWAY”  
“STOP USING MY MATE AS A BODY SHIELD”  
“Don’t worry It’s close by, ish, I won’t be gone for long”

…………………………………………………………….

“You weren’t supposed to go in THAT way! You were supposed to fit in the other way!” Blinky cupped his hands and shouted at Arrg’s little wiggling tail and legs along with a good portion of his body. Blinky tried Pulling, grabbing, tugging, even pushing, noting worked. Well, guess it’s time to ruin the surprise for ONE of their son’s. Arrrg’s voice came out in a muffled tone   
“No! No ruin surprise! can get out!”  
“Arrrg you most certainly can not. This is a situation calls for drastic aid”  
“Noooooo! can unstuck!”  
“hmmm, perhaps putting the sack at the same time wasn’t the greatest idea. How does a heavy magical human do this but a troll can’t?”  
“Shrinking blood magic”  
“hmmm I highly doubt that”  
“Shrinking potion?”  
“highly doubt that as well”

……………………………………………………………………………..

Steve and Eli pulled up to the Lakes house  
“See Eli! It only took 5 minutes”  
“It’s freezing out here though! Plus we were moving quicker-” the two were suddenly interrupted as they heard a crash inside  
“Guess the parties started already”

…………………………………………………………

Guests mingled around, chatting light conversations as Mrs. Nunez kept everything running smoothly.  
“Alright mom, the last of the lights are put up”  
“good, thanks so much for your help sweetheart”  
“everything seems to be running smoothly”  
“thankfully and as expected”  
“think I could go over to Jim’s house? they’re having a little party, and Noten’s there. Would be nice to go, and also prevent him from causing too big a mess”  
“everything’s fine here, alright you can go. But no creating portals in the house!”

…………………………………………………………

Toby panted and gasped as he finished climbing the buildings ladder  
“why...didn’t...you….just...tell me...where...you...were”  
“ahh Hello Tobias-”  
“noo look!”  
“Arrrg?”  
“as you can see he’s currently...well you can plainly see the situation we’re currently experiencing”  
“oookay, uh..huh...whyyy did you go down the chimney?”  
“because the stanta does the same”  
“yeah but-why THIS one? Also didn’t you think, I don’t know, that this wouldn’t work because of how big Arrrg is!?”  
“your santa can, so why couldn’t Arrrg? As for this chimney, it was the only one we could find within the nearest area”  
“i really should explain some stuff later. For the time being, I think the easiest solution will be to just break him out”  
“i thought we were supposed to NOT cause property damage”  
“well, this is an exception. We’ll leave a note and some cash I guess. Or just look the other way...”  
“Are you considering illegal activities?!”  
“I’m just saying...it would be the easiest solution”  
“how many times do I have to teach you. The easiest solution doesn’t always mean the RIGHT one-and you’re already smashing It with your hammer. Oh well, nothing we can do now but continue.”

…………………………………………………………..

Noten was riding between Jim’s horns  
“owowowo my fur!”  
“STOP USING MY MATE AS A SHIELD!”  
“Call the big brute off! I don’t feel like goin out this way! I wanted to die surrounded by loved ones-i uh ern mean, post sex on a black jack table in Vegas”  
“oww my fur! Get off!”  
“Call HIM off!”  
“Draal stop!”  
“NOT UNTIL HE DIES”  
“Draal stop!”  
“call me mate!”  
“Okay, if you want me to and keep it like this. Stop. Good, now calm down! there’s no fighting on christmas! And christmas eve! Noten get off my fur. Good, now-” the front door was pushed inwards as it was already partially open. Eli nervously greeted   
“uh….hello?”  
“Hi! Come on in!”  
“wow uh..okay..where did..you...want me to put..these...”  
“in the kitchen for now”  
“is this a theme?”  
“no it’s a disaster. Long story short. We fucked up”  
“okay”

A few minutes later Claire’s portal opened up, she wiped her cloths down and then saw the state of the home, and everyone cleaning it  
“hi everyone, uh, party start already?”  
“mind helping? Please?”  
“don’t need to give me the puppy dog eyes Jim”

………………………………………………………

Barbara came back into the house after tossing out the last of the broken glass. Once more everything was wonderful. Everyone was settled down and things were looking great. Then the backdoor broke open and Arrrg came inside and pulled a large sack yelling  
“HAHAHAHAHA Santa here! Presents!” He quickly made his way into the living room and dumped out the huge bag of coal. Getting dust and grime all over the place. After the dust settled and everyone finished coughing, Arrrg was smiling with black teeth  
“hahaha! Christams!” Jim wiped his face and almost wanted to cry, everything was ruined! Again! All that hard work for nothing!  
“whhyyyyyy do you have a big bag of coal?! And why did you just dump it!?”  
“hahaha christmas present! I’m santa! Give presents! Coal for all!”  
“Arrg...coal is only given to those on the naughty list. Those on the good list get presents”  
“ohh...ohhhhh...bad santa then”  
“Well this is your first try, it’s...okay...also it’s ho ho ho, not ha”  
“ohhh hohoho!” Blinky came in and looked at Arrrg with a miffed attitude  
“you weren’t supposed to give it to them yet! And we didn’t even get to see it!”  
“hey guys, I brought them. Clearly. Ohhh so THAT’S what was in his sack. Wow, this place is like a giant fireplace now. All that hard work and this happened, this mu-uh...” everyone was irritate as they looked at him  
“so..uh...why don’t I help get a garbage bag...”

…………………………………………………………….

it was now 5pm. Almost the entire day was cleaning, preparing, and fixing things. Everything, once again, was nice and clean and proper. Blinky couldn’t reach certain places so Arrrg lifted him up sweetly. The tree was decorated wonderfully. It shined and weighted the perfect amount on every side. Various ornaments and photos of the years activities were placed inside of it and around it. The actual presents fit snugly under it, carefully placed and stacked. Like one real game of Tetris. While cleaning out the snow, as fast as they could before ALL of it melted, Jim made a snowball and hit Toby in the back of the head with it, Toby grabbed his own and launched back in retaliation. Then a wonderful idea came to Jim….

…………………………………………………………….

There they were. Team trollhunter out in a clear snowy field far away from any civilization. After managing to all cram into a gyre, they took off to a nice place, the place that was where Draal got their tree, which he then showed around and boasted that he found the PERFECT tree and that everyone else may look around but will never find one to evenly match it. Thankfully no avalanche was bound to happen since all the snow nearby was now all on the ground. Barbara, Walt wanted to stay behind, keep Jim’s food cooking and cared for, along with wanting to enjoy everything before it would be ruined. Knowing their luck. Noten stayed behind because he said he ‘didn’t do snow’. He was too small that he almost always got stuck or lost, and that he hated feeling freezing cold. His ‘giblets’ didn’t need that kind of torment apparently. First, a large snowball fight! First it was a free for all, then it slowly turned into two teams. The first, Draal, Jim, Blinky VS Toby, Arrrg, Claire. Eli didn’t like snowball fights, or anything involving things with throwing things at each other, this was the ‘perfect’ chance to be next to Eli and ‘warm him up’ with sharing jackets and holding close. So the two watched and ‘judged’ even though they didn’t really have need for one. It was still fun though!. Arrrg blocked a lot of the snowballs with his large arms and bodies and Toby and Claire made two huge snowballs, to where Arrrg soon launched it towards the opposing team, it crashed and they had to doge out of the way. Draal made his own single giant snowball and hurled it like a frozen boulder at them. It crashed and actually echoed, however now the enemy team had a place to hide behind. 

Draal got to quick work building his own wall for Jim and Blinky. Blinky was throwing rapid snowballs with his four arms. Jim was pitching with pin point accuracy at the others. Claire opened a portal above Jim Blinky and Draal’s heads, and then she and Toby threw their own snowballs into it as fast as they could, making it rain and pelt the enemy with them. With that, Jim decided to go full combat mode. Rolling an armful up, he dove and tucked and nailed them in the head each and every time, never staying in a single place for too long, always being too quickly to catch up to. The group got tired and had their fun. 

Now it was time to build snowmen! Everyone, except for Eli who truly NOW could judge, built their own. Each having their own ‘personal’ touch. Jim’s was packed tightly together, it was a usual classic type of snowman, except his had horns and fangs and a ‘funny face’ and a little stick and pine needle crown, and a tie. Arrrg’s was just one big mashed ball with simple circles and lines. Like the snow boulder grew a big overly happy simple face. Blinky’s was actually very detailed and made well. It looked almost like a snow golem reaching out to attack. Draal’s was another simple one. Except it had spikes and ‘swords’ and weapons and horns and fangs and claws and every part that could have some kind of sharp point to it. Steve’s tried to look like a ‘big buff guy flexing with a sword’. Although Draal mocked it and said it was a weak sword. Toby’s was a well rounded happy snowman with a very ‘business casual’ outfit on, all crafted from pine needles, sticks, and a few pine cones he found. Draal wanted to have them, Toby just told him to go find his own, so he looked! But didn’t find any. Now he just glared at Toby occasionally. Finally Claire’s was more slender and ‘pretty’. her’s had a very detailed dress, along with wings, and a tiara. Eli went around and judged each and every one of them. At the end he said everyone was the winner! They were all wonderful! Draal got mad saying there can be only ONE winner. So Eli quickly chose Blinky for his excerpt craftsmanship. Draal pouted. He wanted to win.

It was getting late and they all headed back to the Lakes home. Making sure to shake off all the snow from them. The intense temperature difference almost hurt, but they adjusted easily enough. Everyone settled down and enjoyed each others company. Noten was going around trying to get everyone to drink his ‘holiday cheer’. He promised that he didn’t have any cocaine in it. Everyone was a little shocked and thought he was joking. Claire told them he was not. Some tasted it and found it WAY too strong to drink. Noten just said they didn’t know how to really party. Everyone but Eli had taken at least a sip. Now Noten was trying to get Eli to drink. Something he practically never does  
“come on. One lil sip won’t hurt! Just a teeny tiny sip!”  
“i said no thank you”  
“just one lil sip! Everyone else did it! don’t you want to? don’t you want to be cooool?”  
“this is like the literal definition of peer pressure”   
“one itty bitty sip! Just for me? Think of it as my christmas gift!”  
“fine. The smallest sip. WOW, UGH” Eli gagged and spat it out.   
“eh dam I wanted SOMEONE to at least enjoy it. I made more than enough! Guess I’ll just have to party by myself….” Jim finished up in the food and set it out for everyone! He made more than enough, mostly knowing the trolls appetite, and finally finishing with everyone full. It was getting late and so they all helped to clean up and exchange gifts. They noticed Noten, Drunk off his ass, laying in the sink, singing horribly. He kept switching from trollish to english, although almost the entire time, it was hard to tell since it was so slurred and sloppy, until he finally passed out cold. They decided to just leave him be. The party was fun, the food was done, the sun had set, it was time to head home. Everyone said their goodbyes and wished each other a happy christmas tomorrow….

………………………………………………………………..

Jim walked down the stairs and stopped when he saw Draal putting various traps and pikes everywhere. Including outside.  
“uh..what...are you doing?”  
“this is my territory. I have claimed it. It belongs to me.”  
“okay...”  
“no one is allowed within it unless I give permission.”  
“okay...”  
“thus I am setting up traps and weapons to defend against intruders”  
“oookayy...”  
“their will be no large magical man coming into my home without my permission. If he wants to, he must ask me face to face, unless he tries a sneak attack. I will have the first strike however! I am prepared! Unlike he will be”  
“Draal...mate...uh...you don’t...have to do this”  
“i do. I will. I am. I have sworn to protect you as well as our family. I will defend you all with my life.”  
“I love that, I really do. But...he’s not coming”  
“how do you know?”  
“because I know for a fact”  
“have I scared him off? If not, then I shall! And if he doesn’t, I will chop off his head and adorn It on one of my pikes outside and show all who look upon it what I do to the enemies of my territory!”  
“Draal...mate...santa isn’t real”  
“yes he is! I’ve seen him at various places! At various times! You have shows and songs and images and everything about him! You practically praise him like a deity!”  
“that’s….true?...but santa isn’t real, he’s just made up. he’s just for fun, to have something to enjoy. it’s mostly for children but everyone has fun. it’s this magical experience that everyone loves. The lights the smells the sounds the entertainment, everything’s just for fun. No one tells kids santa isn’t real until they’re old enough to know. Santa is just supposed to be something kids can believe in to have fun.”  
“so…..no...large man will break in tonight?”  
“no mate”  
“..so….huh….i..was looking forward to it….” Draal’s expression turned to disappointment. He really wanted to fight santa. Jim smiled and thought how cute this was. This whole situation was funny in it’s own way. A large violent, war, fighting troll, bred for combat and slaughter, sad that he couldn’t fight santa. Knowing what santa actually is, comparing it to what Draal knew, it was funny. The idea of Draal charging at some fake santa decoration roaring die was something Jim wouldn’t mind seeing. He went over to Draal and tucked himself under him  
“I’m sorry he isn’t real mate.”  
“It’s alright. Then why are there so many oh him?!”  
“those are just people in costumes to make kids happy. And I want to let you know. The PARENTS decide when to tell their kids he isn’t real. They don’t want to be heart broken just yet. So if any little kid says they saw santa or anything like that, don’t tell them he isn’t real. Let them have their fun, their innocent child wonder”  
“okay...i...will...”  
“well, let’s…..carefully undo these traps. We don’t want anyone to die”  
“you’re right. They are useless now that I know there is no one use them against tonight” and so the two carefully undid it all and packed it away. The next morning Draal did love the whole gift exchange. Jim told Barbara and Walt about last night, first they were shocked and thankful they didn’t go downstairs, second they felt bad for Draal, he was so excited to see santa, even if he wanted to put his head on a pike. They had eggnog and exchanged presents. Draal gave a huge ball of wrapping paper to Jim.   
“at first I found the perfect wrapping paper! But I ran out of it. So I got two more since I wasn’t sure if I would need them fully. I chose one of them, but I had used the other by accident instead. So I used the other one and well, here it is!”  
“wrapped three times, thanks..it’s...uhh...wow….”  
“It’s a picture of a naked woman wrestling with an octopus in the sea! I found it and thought it interesting! I’ve never seen a human have combat with one of those creatures. I thought you might like it since it looked so unique! I don’t understand all the strange symbols on it, but I assumed it was some sort of battle rune”  
“that’s not...this...uh...” Jim just looked to a shocked Walt and Barbara.  
“This...uhh...”  
“you don’t like it. Do you.”  
“no..well...Draal...this isn’t wrestling.”  
“then why are they in physical combat?”  
“they aren’t..it’s...shes...uh...having sex with it”  
“really?”  
“yeahhhh”  
“huh. Is it doing well?”

 

THE END!


	17. Monger madness pt 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eu's finally getting the help he deserves. He's earned it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long to write! well here it is! i hope you enjoy it!

Eu swallowed. His whole body shook. He had put his belongings over on a table nearby. Him, along with Draal and Jim, now stood in one of the smaller simple arena’s, typically reserved for very young children. Truly a level 1. The feast had ended about a half hour ago, everyone went back to their regular business, the entire monger home sprang into life once more. Some mongers watched the trollhunter and Draal train...Eu….they snickered at him or called him names. Jim yelled at them to back off, which they did and some even quickly ran away. Some simply watched wordlessly, others looked bored and eventually left. Eu was terrified! It was bad enough he was doing this, then being outside his nice safe cozy room, THEN having a small group form around them and watch him! Then having some mock him!. He truly wanted to curl up and hide. Something he could quite literally do. He currently held a small basic short sword. It shook heavily in his hands, hardly a decent grip could be mustered. Jim had summoned his sword, Eu had yelped and rolled into a ball when that happened. Jim just reassured him that everything would be fine. So here they were, gently tapping the sides of the swords together  
“now, when you strike downwards, you want to do it in this motion, okay Eu?”  
“y-y-yes m-my t-trollhunter”  
“you can call me Jim remember?”  
“ohh yeah!...I’m sorry I’m terrible at this. I can’t even hold a sword right!” Draal rolled his eyes and grunted  
“you should be letting ME train him. THAT will help him improve.”  
“no Draal-”  
“call me mate.”  
“no mate, you’re far too rough, even at your most gentle ‘setting’”  
“y-y-yeah! you’re like, level 70! and I’m level 0!”  
“what is level?” Jim smiled and replied to Draal’s confused look  
“it’s a video game thing. it’s sorta like a measurement of strength, typically from 1-100. he’s saying you’re very powerful and almost one of the best”  
“hmm...i accept this compliment, but I AM the best.”

 

Jim turned his attention back to his ‘pupil’, he gave a calm warm smile to try and soothe Eu’s nerves  
“when I started out, I was level 0 too!. Then I leveled up, fought Bular, level like, 65-75. beat him, trained a LOT more, and eventually I beat the final boss, Gunmar, level 100. meanwhile I was only level like, 90”  
“10 level’s do make a big difference at times...especially during the final boss...”  
“exactly! All you need to do is believe in yourself, hope for those crits, and make sure to plan your strategy out perfectly”  
“also make sure to relieve yourself before an intense grind”  
“Exactly! my grind was against a lot of things, from gnomes to goblins, to, well, a lot of different things. I went to different areas and unlocked new improved weapons and armor and did all kinds of things! You can too!”  
“i c-can?”  
“yes! there’s LITERALLY no where to go but up at this point! You can’t go any lower. you’re on ground level, you can only improve from here on out”  
“huh...that….makes me feel a lot better” Eu slowly stopped shaking and focused a bit more. Draal raised an eyebrow and said in a tone indicating the slightest interest  
“i have no idea what you’re speaking of, but it appears to have worked” Jim and Eu tapped swords together a bit more before Jim spoke again  
“thing is Eu, there really is no one true way of grinding in life, you can do it anyway you want! Look at me, when I started out, I was a human! Totally different stats! I wasn’t strong or fast, buuut I was smart and learned quickly, so I had my advantages and disadvantages, then eventually I turned into...well...this. A new race, a sub class to add to my own. you’re like me, you don’t have the regular stats, they are lower, but they are higher elsewhere. You are smarter and can learn faster, you have higher constitution and defense. Soon even your strength will go up, sooner than you expect. After all, level 1’s always level up the fastest”  
“yeah….you always start out and move quickly...”  
“Exactly! So, right now, is your very first step. you’ve started up your save file already, you’ve done things and gotten experience, you’ve leveled up other stats, now it’s time to CONTINUE your adventure!”  
“wow...this...actually helps to figure it out”  
“thing is with life, there are no cheat sheets or secret codes. Only going forward and learning. Even basic things. I never knew how to cook, but I practiced and eventually got really good at it. I’m TERRIBLE at horn bumping, even though I’m part troll! Our trollish isn’t on the same level either, there is still things I don’t understand, but I’m always improving. You can never go back, only stopping. So right now, it’s time to choose your first gear. So, right now is the tutorial for each weapon and armor, along with the shields”  
“w-what should I pick? what’s the best starter?”  
“there is no ‘best starter’, only what you’re comfortable with. War hammers are heavy and slow, but hard hitting. Swords are balanced overall. Spears are long range but hard to control at short range, they have a penalty when someone’s next to you, since you can’t really jab them. Crossbows are easy enough, aiming just takes practice. You can try a mace, very easy to use, easy to hit, decent damage. Plus it will last longer in durability”  
“that sounds nice, but swords are always cooler!”  
“yeah, that’s true, but I think right now we should chose the mace, unless you want something else. I have a friend who uses a magical war hammer, he’s a human who was TERRIBLE at it at first, he had worst stats than I did! don’t tell anyone I said that, same to you Draal!-”  
“CALL ME MATE”  
“-But he mastered it, now he’s a force to be reckoned with. I have a friend who uses magic, she can teleport and uses a staff that can be used like a quarter staff.”

 

“ohhh I want magic weapons! Like that can ignore armor or do fire damage!”  
“maybe, first we practice with the tutorial, I know I know EVERYONE skips it. But THIS cannot be skipped.”  
“i really want a cool sword though!”  
“okay, let’s keep the sword. So, want to use a shield with it?”  
“do I get better damage if I dual wield? OHH THAT WOULD BE COOL! Do like, cyclones and stuff!”  
“well, those don’t exist really. Buuut I have this friend who dual wields khopesh swords” Draal spoke up  
“are you speaking of Nomura?”  
“yeah I am!”  
“i can confirm she isn’t someone easy to fight. she’s even beaten me a few times. A FEW times. Still, she has beaten me” Eu gasped  
“WHAAAT NO WAY! SHE’S THAT STRONG?!”  
“she’s an assassin build. Suuuper good accuracy and mobility, also she’s suuuper proficient in her stats. she’s not the strongest with strength like Draal is, and her constitution isn’t the highest, but she can kill you easily. she’s beaten me also!”  
“WHHAAAT BUT YOU’RE LIKE, LEVEL 90!!! WHAT LEVEL IS SHE?!”  
“I’d say, 95. but like I said, everyone has stats, she might be a higher level in some stats, but there is NO WAY she could beat Gunmar, even if she is a high level. Level numbers don’t truly matter in real life, each situation needs certain stats. For instance, Draal lost an arm as you can see, he has HUGE constitution stats, buuut he doesn’t have good charisma and intelligent stats, but that’s to a HUMAN. With trolls, hes great! But when in human levels, he’s terrible”  
“are you mocking me my mate? I cannot tell”  
“no I’m not! I’m pretty much saying how each person is good in their own way. you’re very big and strong and know how to shrug off blows, but having casual conversation isn’t your strong side”  
“ah, I see what you mean. Please continue with your strange training. It seems quite effective. Blinky would be proud”  
“see Eu, that’s another example. Blinky has the HIGHEST Intelligent stats. I’ve never met anyone who has higher stats, he’s at LEAST level 97 in it. But fighting? He isn’t very good”  
“HAHAHA YOU CAN REPEAT THAT MY MATE!”  
“so, everyone’s good in their own environment. Do you get what I mean Eu?”

 

“i totally do! Wow, what do you think my stats are?”  
“hmm, intelligence and charisma”  
“but I suck at those!”  
“not to human levels”  
“ooohhhhh”  
“my class forced me to do things I was TERRIBLE AT”  
“HAHAHAH SAY THAT AGAIN MY MATE!”  
“i had penalty's to my stats, buuuut I overcame them and became stronger!”  
“ohh classes! I wana talk classes! Also I wana be a hybrid sub race!”  
“Well, sorry but you can’t be a hybrid, kinda only I could unlock it”  
“Aww...okay well I wana be like you! I want the trollhunter class!”  
“sorry but that’s a one time thing too, one trollhunter only per life”  
“aww, okay then I wana be like a magical fighter then! Bad ass like you with magic armor and a huge bad ass sword and can do all the cool moves!”  
“well, that’s a pretty hard class”  
“i want to!”  
“are you sure?”  
“yes!”  
“even if you’re afraid of pain?”  
“oh...uh...hm...”  
“well, one step at a time, you CAN be your own unique thing, like I said, no one has to be the same all the time. No cookie cutter stats and class.”  
“then I will be my own! Like yours! But my own style!”  
“Great! then let’s do it!”  
“uh...maybe...i...do want to try the mace...the blunt one...i...i kinda don’t want to cut myself by accident...but it won’t look cool like a sword!”  
“we can make it cool, swords aren’t the only weapons with different skins”  
“yeah...yeah!”  
“and you might unlock or find a super special one just for you in your adventures”  
“YEAH! YEAH LET’S DO IT!”  
“my mate, I have no idea what you’re talking about. But you’ve pumped up the most scared monger I’ve ever met into wanting to fight. You truly are a good monger and trollhunter”  
“thanks mate, thing is, everyone have different needs to grow strong and practice. Find it, and bingo! we’re in business!”  
“Jim..uh...i wanted to talk about armor...”  
“sure!”  
“what should I do?”  
“well, you know armor, heavy light medium, what do you want?”  
“i dunno. Heavy will make sure I don’t get hurt, but I’m not strong enough to have it on always. Your armor is like, ultra strong!”  
“well I guess it has the stats of heavy, but considered light”  
“ohhh neat! Uh….i wana try light, just cause it’ll be easier on me and still make sure I don’t at least die”  
“good to know! let’s add that to the list”  
“should I have a shield?”  
“do you want one?”  
“well...i don’t wana get hurt...but I don’t wana carry one around all the time. You have one! But you can just summon it!”  
“true, how about we do try it for a little bit, you might like it, you might not. Worse case is you just don’t use one”  
“yeah! Okay!” Eu bounced on his feet as he ran over to the inventory section of the arena, a new giddy energy came from him as he searched for what he desired most. Draal walked over and put a hand on Jim’s shoulder  
“My mate, you are doing wonderful, I have no idea what you speak or act, but you have started a whelps journey to become greatness”  
“no dr-mate, he already started his journey a while ago, I’m just helping him find the right path”  
“you truly are a wonderful trollhunter. My father would be proud”  
“he already is Draal, same to you, he loves us both”  
“i wish I could embrace him one last time”  
“i would love to give it to you if I could”  
“i know you would my mate. Hm, look at that whelp, can hardly even put armor on properly. I best go help him”  
“go on big guy, our friend needs us”

……………………………………………………

 

Well, how fun, for Draal not so much for Eu however. Jim finally let Draal start his own training, after constant nagging of course, so after helping Eu armor up, grab a shield, switch weapons, it was time to fight!. Well, Eu mostly just ran away crying mercy while Draal ran after him roaring  
“DIE WHELP!” Jim couldn’t help but stifle a laugh, not from Eu being scared, but by the fact that his mate was being outran by a much smaller, much younger monger. Then again, he wasn’t rolling up into a ball. After a few laps around the arena Eu collapsed onto the floor, panting heavily and begging for mercy from Draal, who had his ax raised above his head, ready to swing the executioner's blow.  
“what are your final words? Your last words as an alpha. Your last words as a monger.’  
“p-p-p-p-plea-se! N-no! I’ve never even had sex!”  
“truly a shame for any monger. I shall put you out of your misery.”  
“JIM PLEASE HELP!”

SLASH

Eu was shaking and covering his face, when he didn’t feel anything, he peeped through his fingers to see the ax dug into the ground only a hair away from his own skull.   
“there. Now you’ve tasted the last moments before death whelp. Sour, cold, intense. Memorize it, let the experience teach you what you wish to truly avoid. Your learning has just begun.”  
“i-i-i-i”  
“do not wet yourself.”  
“i-i- w-won’t”  
“good. Now stop shaking and get back up.”  
“o-o-ok-kay” Eu had a hard time pushing himself up by his arms, he was shaking too much to really have any energy put forth.  
“must I even help you rise?”  
“p-please?” Draal groaned and with a roll of his eyes, he grabbed Eu by his horns and lifted him up like a bag of chips  
“how will you breed an omega if you cannot even take the faintest blow? How do you plan on winning a courting event if you cannot even stop shaking at the slightest charge from an enemy? How do you plan on impregnating your mate and having your own whelp”  
“i-i-i-i”  
“stop stuttering. Hmpf…...you need something to boost your confidence. I do not know how to speak to you as my mate did, however I know that I can help you boost your confidence as a monger. You need to taste blood. You need to feel alive. You need to experience mating. Perhaps a live demonstration….my mate, come over here-” Eu clapped excitedly  
“OHH YES PLEASE!”  
“NO I AM NOT GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU IN FRONT OF HIM!”  
“please please please please Jim! it’s for my training!”  
“NO.” both mongers awwwed in disappointment. Jim sighed and made a minor grin. Mongers truly celebrate sex right up on the list. Sex, loyalty, bloodshed. The big monger three.  
“alright boys, listen, I think it’s time for a little break, let’s come back in, say, an hour. Eu, go home for a bit and relax yourself-”  
“so masturbate?”  
“sure why not”  
“yay!”  
“Draal, let’s go, I want something to eat and drink, and NOT whatever monger traditional food there is, I can’t stomach it, and I need fresh water.”

……………………………………………………….

Jim walked the market streets for roughly a half hour or more, looking for any more food he could actually eat. The entire time, almost every monger was friendly. They smiled and said hello, poked or sniffed at him, or asked for a fight. Jim always politely said maybe later, he was a bit tired and needed some time to himself. It was a nice walk around. Crowded, but nice. The market didn’t smell the most fresh, but he became nose blind to it, thankfully. Jim didn’t know where Draal ran off to, all he said was that he was going to ‘acquire’ certain things. Jim assumed it must be something that he could eat, use to fuck Jim with, something to ‘monger’ romance Jim, or a new weapon. Always one of the four. Out of all the loud noise, his ears picked up on some voices, younger mongers, something somewhat rare around here, and decided to go to the source. As he came closer he heard the voices more clear. Someone talking to Eu  
“-ain.”  
“come on, I’m just trying to go.”  
“crawl back to your home? Then do it. Get on the ground and crawl!”  
“I am NOT going to do that!”  
“go ahead and crawl on the ground like a goblin and we’ll let you go home”  
“leave me alone!”  
“no! You need to toughen up! we’re just helping our kin do it”  
“You’re just being a bully!”  
“bully? no. we are BULLS. Unlike you.”  
“I don’t have to prove anything to you”  
“do it!”  
“leave me alone!”  
“DO IT”  
“ow don’t shove me!”  
“ohh, like this?”  
“please stop!”  
“no. not until you fight back.”  
“I don’t feel like having my ass kicked. Let me pass please, I just want to go home, I’m not bothering anyone!”  
“oh? Then why did we see you get that omega necklace?”  
“it’s for..uh...”  
“Eu the weak? Trying to waste a perfectly good omega’s time?”  
“I’m….I….”  
“i-i-i-i. Ohhh getting upset? Well fight me! DO IT! I WANT TO FEEL HOW PATHETIC YOU ARE!”  
“i...I’m not pathetic”  
“yeah you are”  
“I’m good at other things!”  
“like what?”  
“i know tech!...sorta...but more than you!”  
“ohhhh you know how to turn a light on!”  
“more than that! I’m even going to get myself a title!”  
“Eu the plain is trying to get himself a title?”  
“Yes!”  
“how?”  
“by!...uh...um….proving myself to the old man! Ow! Why do you have to hit me-HEY THAT’S MY BRIEFCASE!”  
“ohhh shiny! Looks pretty good!”  
“don’t lick it! Nononon don’t chew on it! That cost a lot!”  
“alright. I will stop, so will the others. IF you can say ONE good thing about yourself. Well? I’m waiting”  
“I...uh..i…..I KNOW THE TROLLHUNTER!”  
“you...know...the trollhunter...really?!”  
“yeah!”  
“wow! that’s amazing!”  
“IT...is?...”  
“wow! I can’t believe you got to do something so amazing! I’m so jealous of you now!”  
“y-you are?”  
“yeah! The greatest thing someone could lie about! what’s next, you’re actually Draal?” Eu groaned and looked at the ground. The other 5 just laughed at him and tossed around his briefcase, one even kicked dust at him.

 

“oh, hey Eu” the 6 mongers looked at Jim, a fun smile on his face as he walked next to Eu’s side.  
“uh-h-hi!”  
“I hope you’re nice and rested! it’s time to get back to training! Oh and don’t worry, we can use our own personal arena, so no one gets to watch our private sessions! I will teach you what ONLY a trollhunter knows! The way I killed Gunmar himself! You have to promise me you won’t teach anyone else. You, Draal, and I are going to be the ONLY ones who know the secret trollhunter moves I’ve only used when I fought and killed Gunmar, well, AFTER I killed his son Bular all alone on that bridge. Oh and about that suuuper secret magic weapon and armor, I think I found a way to make it for you, a nice somewhat similar replica to my own, although you’re going to need to bond to it, so you can summon it at any time like I can, oh! AND you get to pick out your very own incantation! I managed to get my mother in law, Ballustra, to personally hand craft and perfect it just for you! Oh, sorry I didn’t notice you 5, it’s nice to meet you! I didn’t get a chance to really meet everyone yet, Eu was giving me my own personal tour around the monger home! he’s really great at it too! I’m really glad to be his friend, he’s honestly one of the top 10 mongers-ohh I probably shouldn’t be saying the secret list. Oh! How could I forget, but later Draal wants to teach you his own secret move, he’s honestly only EVER done it to finish off an opponent! So LITERALLY I am the ONLY one who knows it! Because it’s the last thing everyone sees before he kills them. Ohhh you got the omega necklace! Good job! After we train a bit, I’ll continue our own private lessons on how to seduce one of my kind~, by the end of the month, every omega will want to be with you! First, we need to meet Draal and Ballustra, and the old man, a nice heartstone surprise. Oh did you loose your briefcase and he found it? That’s really nice of you to return it to him. Why does it have slobber on it? Ah whatever, OH when we get back, I’ll sign it along with your laptop and your new gear you’re about to get. Anyways, let’s go! See you guys later! Come on Eu, we have a lot of work to do just for you Eu, haha all that rhymed!” Jim gently pulled Eu’s arm to tug him along behind him. Jim gave a friendly smile one last time to the group of bullies. Each one, completely shocked to the core, their jaws open and eyes as wide as they could be. Eu was jumping on the tips of his toes and the happiest he could possibly be.

 

As the two made their way back to their ‘private’ arena, which is now called ‘off limits’ to everyone from now until Jim and Draal say it’s open again. They made it so no one was allowed to watch or hear them. The two of them talked  
“okay, they’re out of earshot, so Eu, did I do a good job of REALLY rubbing it in? I heard them picking on you, at least a little bit. Reminded me when I was having to deal with it. So I thought, why not really show our friendship off to them, really make them finally want to be near you and beg to be your friend, to which you can say no, and say you’re busy training with me. At least if you want to. I tried to talk you up and really made them want to be in your shoes, well, place.”  
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YOU DID AMAZING! THIS IS THE HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE!”  
“okay so, just a heads up, all that other stuff, it’s not real, sorry”  
“oh….well STILL, YOU TOTALLY SHOWED THEM! THAT’S THE BEST GIFT I’VE EVER GOTTEN! Well I mean other than your friendship and us training and-well you get it”  
“the promise of the autograph, the secret training, and the ‘special moves’ are all true. Except Draal’s, he doesn’t have some ‘super ultra secret power finishing move’, I just wanted to talk you up”  
“I DON’T CARE THAT WAS STILL AMAZING! Ohhhhh I wish wish wish wish wish I could have recorded that! I would watch their reactions sooo many times!”  
“maybe next time we could ‘accidentally’ bump into them while we’re both recording something”  
“that. Would. be. AMAZING! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! I-i meant-please don’t think-please don’t tell Draal!”  
“rellaaaaxxxxx, I know what you meant. don’t worry, I will always make sure Draal will NEVER hurt you, well in a non training way. I highly doubt you’d do anything to really piss me off, we’re too much alike for that to happen”  
“I LOVE MY NEW TROLLHUNTER MORE THAN KANJIGAR!- oh shit..i..i didn’t mean it! I’m sorry ancestors for speaking such ill will of you all-”  
“hey it’s okay! He wouldn’t care”  
“how would you know?”  
“i talk to him”  
“like...what?”  
“so, back in trollmarket, the place I actually train at and, by the way, I AM going to take you there and show you around AND meet my friends AND where I live AND-”  
“NO MORE! I THINK I’M GOING TO FAINT!”  
“I’m really happy we’re friends”  
“i can’t even describe how much I love you! I mean..uh...you know, anyways, how do you talk to him?”  
“oh yeah, so in the heroes forge, the place where we train, there is this thing, well point is I can use it and kinda teleport to this ghost realm, like a secret place only I can unlock and go to, anyways so ALLLLL the previous trollhunter ghosts are living there. Well, not ‘LIVING’ but you get what I mean. Anyways Kanjigar and I talk all the time! he’s really great”  
“i…..i never got to meet him, I was always too scared, and he was always busy and surrounded and then he left”  
“he was nice, well, still is. He supports my mate-hood-thingy. Point is he loves that I’m with Draal and Draal’s with me. Anyways so alll the ghosts give me advice and wisdom and stuff. Think of it as my own personal walk through guide from their own experiences. So my ‘secret moves’ I AM taught. Kinda like my go to, level up, move upgrade place.”  
“that’s so cooool! Can I ever talk to ghosts?”  
“honestly, I don’t know, not that I know of”  
“huh, but like...i know you said all the other stuff wasn’t true, WHICH I don’t mind! Since this is sooooo amazing! But about the...courting...”  
“THAT’S still going to happen. Although the ‘end of the month’ thing might not actually happen, training and romance takes time. Believe it or not but even Draal still struggles with it”  
“wait, Draal, THE Draal, YOUR Draal”  
“yep!”  
“but he’s like, top monger! How does he not know how to put the moves on ya!”  
“well, he does in his monger way, which I love!, but I’m more ‘human romance’ type, since I was full human and all that. he’s really trying hard to do it, learning is hard for him but he never gives up. THAT’S something you can TRULY learn. Never give up. Keep pushing. Even if it’s just the smallest step at a time. it’s still a step forward no matter what.”  
“i promise, everything you teach me I will NOT forget! I will always put every bit of my focus on it at all times! When I...ever have my own whelp...I’m going to name him Jim!”  
“and if you had a girl?”  
“uh...Jimty!” Jim snorted and laughed   
“Jimty? Well I’ve never heard that! Truly will be unique! don’t worry I’m not making fun of you, it just caught me off guard. Speaking of guard, here we are! Okay, let’s see if we can get you some nice light armor on you, put a mace in your hand, and a shield in the other. I think it would be good to learn how to block properly….”

…………………………………………………………………………..

Eu laid on the ground, looking up at the ceiling of the monger home, so high up it almost seemed like it was the sky itself, and the openings where snow fell down from, were clouds. He was tired. so. So. So tired. he’s never worked out this hard in all 401 years of his life. Running around, hitting things, more running around, more hitting, more running around out of fear from Draal threatening to kill hi. He just wanted to crumble to stone from numbness. Jim looked down at him, smiled, then did a squat  
“hey”  
“hi….”  
“so. You all tuckered out?”  
“yeah….”  
“so. We did physical. Wana know what happens next?”  
“...i...guess….”  
“huh, not much enthusiasm, guess you really don’t want my help”  
“NONONOONON I’M SORRY I JUST WAS TIRED! I WANT YOUR HELP MORE THAN ANYTHING!”  
“even more than the omega of your dreams?”  
“i...uh...i….uh….”  
“I’m kidding! Like I said, you’re my friend, and I’m here to help! Now then. I want you to get allll cleaned up. Okay?”  
“okay”  
“after, meet me here okay”  
“okay”

…………………………………………………………..

Eu swallowed, his breathing was broken, his body was shaking…

earlier after he came back, Jim had told him it was time to start his second kind of training. Courting. Eu of course was excited but nervous. Jim said the best way to do so, is to get experience. To which, Eu thought he would practice with Jim. NOPE! Instead, his biggest fears happened. He now stood down a street with Jim, looking forward to the opposite end. There, was the omega of his dreams. Jim told him they were going to talk to him, right, now. Eu almost fainted from fear. He felt a LOT better though when Jim explained that Draal was nervous when he talked to Jim. Draal. THE DRAAL. NERVOUS?! It almost seemed unreal.   
“Okay Eu, just take a nice deeeep breath. There you go. Now, you have the necklace? Good! Now, you’re going to walk up to him, with me don’t worry, and say hello. Then present to him the necklace, and then talk a bit, then it’s over. You can leave”  
“i...uh….i want to mate with him sooo badly….i think I might faint”  
“don’t. You can do this. Everyone is nervous the first time. Now then, let’s start walking. Come on, one step at a time. don’t make me drag you. There, now closer. And closer.”  
“w-w-what do I say?!”  
“hello”  
“and then what?!”  
“how are you doing?”  
“THEN WHAT?!”  
“then just ask how he’s doing. Then present the necklace kindly.”  
“THEN WHAT?! I’M SHAKING SO BADLY I’M AFRAID IT MIGHT FALL OUT OF MY HAND!”  
“breathe. There you go. Be sweet, say what monger courting things are, I honestly, don’t know much, other than what Draal does, but he tries human things so, I’m not sure about all of it”  
“w-what do I hunt for him!? What if he doesn’t like my trophy!?”  
“then hunt bigger game”  
“i can’t!”  
“yes you can, I’ll help you, along with Draal. I give you omega lessons, he gives you alpha lessons”  
“okay...just say hello….”  
“now go get him!”  
“i...” Eu took another unsteady breath. Swallowed down his fears and walked forward.  
“h-h-hi B-Braz” the omega turned around from looking at various vendor items  
“oh hello Eu” aaannnnddd of course Eu from up. He quickly looked to Jim, who rolled his eyes and came up  
“hello, I’m Jim”  
“WOW! I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M MEETING YOU!”  
“yep! Nice to meet you too Braz”  
“I just can’t believe I would ever meet you!”  
“I’m happy you’re happy, so well, you know Eu, he would like to talk, OH SPEAKING OF I GOTTA GO! I need to go do something real fast! I’ll see you later Eu” Eu gasped out  
“W-W-W-AIT DON’T LEAVE ME!”  
“too late!” and with that Jim ran off. Eu turned around to see Braz with an amazed expression on his face  
“i can’t believe I met him!”  
“yeah he’s great! he’s my friend”  
“wow! you’re so lucky!”   
“yeah I am!..uh...Braz...”  
“yeah Eu”  
“i..uh...well..uh….h-h-here”  
“oh, thank you” Braz looked at the necklace in Eu’s hand held up to him, then to a clearly nervous Eu, as if he was about to have his hand ripped off. Braz put his hand ontop of the necklace, feeling it gently. He then took it for himself, looked at it once more then finally said  
“thank you. I’m surprised with you” Eu’s body felt like it was being consumed by a cold burn

 

“y-y-ou are?”  
“yes. I had no idea you felt this way about me”  
“yeah...i….do...”  
“You’ve never once spoken to me, or even been around me”  
“i...uh...was...always...too...afraid...”  
“you don’t have any confidence. I don’t like that”  
“i….i know….I’ll go...”  
“you don’t need to”  
“i d-don’t?”  
“no. I really like who you are. it’s nice that you have interests about things outside of our home. I’ve always wanted to explore and learn, I’ve always put it off though, I wouldn’t even know where to start. you’ve gone out, then came back, it wasn’t much so no one bothered to celebrate, I thought it was interesting. I wanted to speak to you about it, but you were always gone. So I thought I wouldn’t bother you, I assumed you were busy. The other alphas are nice, they’re much stronger and bigger and more confident than you are and I’m more than sure they could easily provide for me far better than you ever could. it’s nice and I do want that, but I’m more interested in the rest of the world, than just being trapped here in an endless loop. I love our home, but I just want to understand the rest of the world. there’s so much outside and I want to learn about all of it, or at least some of it. I want to be like the old man, I want to be wise and know so many things and be able to help our kin. Would you be willing to help me?”  
“YES!”  
“well that was a fast answer”  
“I’ve always wanted to be your mate! I’ve thought of you constantly! I always thought I’d never have a chance with you so I never tried and I avoided you because I thought you thought of me as a looser and the other alphas would just taunt and beat me up for trying to be near you and wow you are sooooo pretty and smell soooo good up close! I want to love and provide for you and breed you endlessly and make you so happy you would forget sadness even existed! I want to teach you everything I know and more! We could learn together and I could teach you about the internet and memes!”  
“what’s a meme?”  
“It’s hard to explain. I guess, it’s a joke people make? Well it’s something to learn about-anyways that doesn’t matter right now! This really is the happiest day of my life!”  
“I’m glad to have made you happy. I want to watch you claim a title, along with me, we can explore the world and the rest of life and memes together, no one else would provide that kind of life for me, I think this is what I truly want...i….can’t have you though”  
“w-w-what w-why not?”  
“i don’t want you to die if you try to court me. You are too weak and small, I don’t really have to explain it, but you are so kind and I couldn’t bear to watch you die simply for trying to love me”  
“oh…..”  
“if there were any other way to court, I’d gladly accept it”  
“i-i promise, I’m going to find a way for us to court, I’m never going to stop searching, I want to give you that life, I promise, for the rest of my life, I’m going to dedicate it to finding our answers”  
“i will wait for it, for a time, I can’t wait for the rest of my life, but we’re both still young, and we have a lot of time to wait. So I will do just that. Wait. I won’t accept any other courtings. I will also search as much as I can”

 

“thank you sososoosso much! I can’t wait to love you and hold you and kiss you and breed you endlessly! I pleasure myself constantly to the thoughts of you-i...shouldn’t...have said that….”  
“i feel a bit...hmm...complimented that someone thought of me so much...even if it is a bit….much….still. what’s kissing?”  
“I’ll show you one day! it’s a human sign of affection!”  
“i want to learn about humans as well, they have been along side us for so long, no one cares for them, but I want to learn. I want to understand who we live with, not just them, but the other troll tribes as well. I hope we can have this life” with that, Braz put the necklace around one of his larger horns, and indication that someone is courting him.  
“wow...i….wow….this is the greatest day of my life….i would have never thought I’d ever have this in my life, meeting Jim, talking to him, befriending him, training with him, and now courting you...i….wow” Braz smiled in a pleasant way, making Eu’s heart melt  
“could I...kiss...you?”  
“if it has to do with courting, I don’t see why not, it’s not breeding is it?”  
“no. it’s simple, uh, here. Just. Hold still” with that, they kissed!  
“wow...my first kiss...”  
“that was it? It really is a simple human gesture, I don’t understand it though”  
“i think you might like it if we do it more later down the line...i….i love...this...being with you. Talking to you. Everything is so wonderful. I have to go though, I’ll talk to you soon! I promise!”  
“i will hold you to that promise” they both shared a smiled before Eu turned to leave back to the arena. It was only a few steps until he walked into Toh and his little bully group.  
“oh hey Toh, excuse me I need to return to Jim, we’re on a first name biases.”  
“did you just...talk to Braz?!”  
“yes, and we’re courting now, no I haven’t made an official courting, so don’t even think that you get to kill me, well speaking of killing, I think Draal is going to teach me now, well, bye. Toh.”

……………………………………………………………………

Jim was happy. He sat down on a nearby bench, watching Draal talk to Eu about various monger alpha things. He was so happy that Eu did a great job. Everything went perfectly, much better than Jim even thought it would. Right after Eu came back and shared the great news, telling them of his conversation, Draal got right to teaching him. Jim wanted to make sure his new friend achieved his dream. He wondered how they would actually get together with one another. He IS the trollhunter, maybe he could help in some way...hmm….Jim’s eyes turned towards the hearthstone, then unconsciously to his potential home….why did he do that?….


	18. Monger madness pt 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a small goodbye, a bittersweet nostalgia, a quick chat with mom, a fun text, a surprise, a training of a nerdy wimp, a walk and talk, a: THE THINKING ROCK!, a change for the rest of your life (ish?), a choice for the future, A WAY TOO EXCITED NERD, a meet and greet, a almost slipped secret, a show of action!, a more excited meet and greet, a LET ELI ENJOY THE MAGIC SHOW STEVE, a MEETING OF NERDS, a travel home, a true home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wooo! seriously?! 18 days since last update?! GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME AUSTIN, THAT IS WAAAAYYYY TOO LONG OF A WAIT! XD. so, a couple things.  
> 1\. a friend and i always joke about shit all the time. ONE OF THEM is about dildos. okay so she showed me these dildo package stories. basically dildos being sent in the mail and just being an awful awkward experience. anyways so, she and i talked about a joke of Draal getting the mail and finding a dildo that his and Jim's son ordered. (spoilers? idk XD AND YES HE'S GAY AF, why? CAUSE EVERYONE'S GAY!) ANYWAYS so Draal is like:  
> "huh. a size queen. guess it runs in the family" and he looks over at Jim and Barbara. anyways i was laughing WAYYY too hard. so i knew i HAD to say it on here.  
> and 2. we joked about is if he and Vex met. them being total punching buddies and swapping war stories and arguing over what better way to kill opponents and what weapons are superior  
> "gouge out their eyes first!"  
> "no! tear their limbs off first!"
> 
> the two watch soap operas together  
> "these fleshbag women are always arguing and stabbing one another in the back"  
> "Vex also wish's these women would ACTUALLY stab each other in the back. now THAT would be proper entertainment"  
> "they are always mating other males, especially that one. she is not faithful"  
> "she's also a lying hoe"
> 
> Arguing over what's better  
> "HONOR"  
> "NO GLORY!"
> 
> When Draal becomes a dad  
> "I thought grounded meant to bury others within the earth as punishment"  
> "Vex agrees! I did TOO!. so disappointing when it wasn't"
> 
>  
> 
> anyways, that's all i gotta say for RN. enjoy the fic!!!!!

The sun was setting and they needed to leave. Jim was saying goodbye to Eu  
“now Eu, when you go home, I want you to remember everything we taught you, don’t worry, we’re going to come back really soon, probably tomorrow!. So no worries! Also, you have my number, do NOT feel awkward if you want to talk whenever, also I do NOT feel like you’re annoying me when you message me a lot, just don’t send like, 50 things at once, okay?”  
“okay!”  
“remember, anytime you wana talk, even if it’s dumb memes, go ahead and talk to me!”  
“roger that!”  
“roger?’  
“i don’t know why I said that”  
“well! I want you to never forget, I’m here for you okay?”  
“okay!...what...about Braz? What should I do!?”  
“well, talk to him when you want, and talk to ME when you feel nervous or just need advice, or anything else”  
“okay! Will do!...is...it wrong...to masturbate to him?”  
“honestly, I don’t know, it’s up to him, you DID tell him, so idk.”  
“CAN I masturbate now that I’m courting him? Well, sorta courting”  
“of course! Why wouldn’t you be allowed to?”  
“YAY!”  
“do it as much and as often as you want! No one’s gonna stop you! Well, maybe your mom-whatever you get my point”  
“YAY! And yeah I do! I can’t wait until I get to finally have sex!”  
“it’s nice! Just remember, you BOTH need to be ready. don’t force him into something he isn’t ready for, same with you. And that applies to EVERYTHING in a relationship, okay? Sometimes Draal want’s to do things that I feel uncomfortable with, so he doesn’t. And sometimes I do things and he’s not comfortable with it. Always be open to talk and communicate”  
“will do! Man, I’m sooo thankful for you Jim! My blessing! My trollhunter! My everything!...okay that’s...weird...”  
“nah I got what you meant. Well, see ya!”  
“will I...still get to train and go to your place and visit your trollmarket and everything?”  
“of course! Not today, but soon, and we won’t stop training until you’re totally a pro”  
“even if it takes years?”  
“why not! Not like I’m going anywhere for the time, and you’re my friend, and it’s fun”  
“YAY!”  
“alright big guy, you go do what you want”  
“masturbate!”  
“then you jerk it like there’s no tomorrow!”  
“YAY! you’re the best!”  
“Thanks. Alright, Draal-mate you….ready...” Jim looked over at the edge of the arena where Draal was standing, motionless and just looking between the heartstone and their potential home.  
“Draal?...mate I mean...” Jim said in a worried tone. Usually Draal NEVER ignored Jim, however currently he was in his own little world. Jim frowned as he walked over, then placed a hand gently on Draal’s arm to gain his attention  
“Sorry, did you speak? I didn’t hear”  
“i said we should get going, the sun’s setting and It would be nice to...go...home”  
“mhm. Home. Yes. We should. Depart now”  
“Dr-mate, I still haven’t decided. I’m...I’m sorry”

 

“it is alright. I am happy with you and our life. Being here just….brings back memories. I remember I would always watch the heartstone during the sunset, look upon it as the blood red glow would brighten from the sunlight coming forth through a mountains opening next to it. It glowed so wonderfully. I felt powerful and wanted to be the best warrior. I would overcome all others who stood in my way. It always set my heart at ease, thinking of my training and what my future would hold. Then mother and father would welcome me back home with a fistfight. Ah, such a wonderful childhood. After I earned my meal they would tell me of the day they met. The courting event. The living. Then the conception of me. Such a beautiful life. I always promised myself that I would be just like my mother and father, amazing and wonderful to my mate and my whelp. I would sacrifice myself for their safety, love, and happiness, if need be at any given moment. When I was closing my eyes, about to sleep, I would listen to the heart of our home. The sounds of others, talking, fighting, mating. The sounds of armor and weapons and other various things being forged. My favorite always was the hammers on fresh hot metal. From the heavy poundings, to the soft clinks, it was all so….wonderful. I felt so at ease. I was home. And it would never change. I told myself that I would not court until I could perfect my fighting and power. I wouldn’t want to embarrass myself in front of my future mate, right before being killed by a stronger opponent.” 

Draal sighed with a happy nostalgia then continued  
“i remember watching other courting events. Such excitement! Such fun! I always did like to play in the remains of our dead, before they were swept away and given a proper monger funeral. The feeling like I was the one who slew them all, that I would be strong enough to slaughter that many at once. I was excited to feel myself be heavily wounded, to feel my body hurt and ache, excited to get my new scars from battle. I truly did love my time here. Then, well, I left with my father, and you know the rest.”  
“wow, that does sound…..like a very good…..monger...childhood”  
“it truly was. I wish father could be here one last time. The moment we departed, was the last time he saw this place”  
“well, if it’s any help, I’m sure he’s looking down, or above, or whatever, at us right now”  
“mmhh, that would be nice. Hello father. I miss your touch, I miss fighting you, I miss….being...hugged…..i miss the stories you would tell me. I miss all the times we would drink together and then fight more” Draal closed his eyes and let out a heavy sigh.  
“it’s okay to cry Draal”  
“a monger doesn’t cry”  
“it’s okay to do so. You know it makes others feel good”  
“hm. no. thank you for supporting me though. I don’t know how I’d live without you. I would slaughter half the world in my grief”  
“please don’t. I’m always going to be here for you big guy. I feel nostalgia like you do at times. When I was a kid, and human too! Something Blinky and Walt taught me: it’s good to look to the past and learn, but it’s NOT good to let it weigh you down, keeping you in the present, unable to move forward into the future”  
“very wise. From both of them”  
“we need to live in the moment, and look ahead, but always focus on the now. Speaking of now, when we get home, you want me to take that kilt of yours off, Then we have a little fun?” Draal growled a bit in agreement, then looked over at the heartstone one last time. Letting those wise words register into his mind. After a good stare, he returned to looking at Jim, then gave a strong hug  
“i would love to~. Also you’re right. This is my life. With you. And I couldn’t be happier. Like you said, it’s not as if we won’t ever return”  
“exactly! we’ll come and go whenever!”  
“that is very true.”  
“yep!. Well anyways, you ready to head home”  
“of course. We may be on the other side of the planet but time zones don’t exist at this very moment so it’s easier to write with scene to scene, looking up what hours and parts of the day it is at the current time and trying to figure out how to properly do scenes without ruining the story”

And so they left and came home. It was empty and quiet, Barbara and Walt were out late that night on their own little date. Draal and Jim had sex  
(you know me! Skipping it over because I honestly don’t know how to write it all the time! WHAT, THERE ARE ONLY SO MANY WAYS YOU CAN SUCK DICK. I’m pretty sure I’ve said that already BUT STILL!)  
After a nice little one on one time~ it was time for a nice hot shower. The mood was calm and quiet, relaxing and warm, it was easy to fall asleep with one another shortly after.

……………………………………………..  
The next morning  
……………………………………………..

It was very early in the morning. Draal and Jim were getting ready to leave and head back over to the mongers! The two had agreed to go back, they still had a lot of fun to be had! Things to catch up on, and Eu to train!. Draal had left a few minutes before Jim did, saying he would meet his mate in trollmarket. Jim was finishing up his morning routine until he came across his mother who was yawning and trying to drink coffee  
“morning mom” Jim said with a hug and a kiss  
“morning sweetie”  
“late night out?”  
“yes, it was pleasant, until work called and I had to leave right away. I just got back home about a half hour ago, Walt just called me and told me he was on his way home. When I left he left somewhere to meet someone, I was a little too focused on getting ready for work to really pay attention. Don’t tell him I said that”  
“i promise, alright, well I’m heading out, I’ll talk to you later”  
“where are you headed?”  
“out with Draal, oh wow, I haven’t even told you about yesterday. Okay so, long story short, I went to the monger home. THE monger home, like, trollmarket but it’s just their...well..home. Wow it is CRAZY over there! I’ll have to update you on it but Draal’s waiting for me at trollmarket, we’re about to go back to the monger home. First time Draal’s been there since he left on the mayflower and everything. It is REALLY...well...monger!. it’s LITERALLY Draal but like, times a billion. HE’S sooooo well mannered compared to everyone else! And their leader, is like, this MEGA MONGER! I’ll have to take pictures and stuff, anyways I actually have good wifi there because of this friend I made, his name is Eu, like Ew. Anyways, big looser, I was a big looser, we got along, and now I’m training him to get his own husband and train him how to fight. The monger place is pretty...overwhelming, but it’s...well...fun! Okay, Draal just text me, I got to go, love you! Bye!” with that he gave her another hug and kiss…..

……………………………………………….

(text time! C=claire T=toby J=jim E=eli S=steve. Although that prob is obvious at this point XD)

zzzzt  
zzzzzzzt

J “heeyyy anyone up?”  
T “oh god jim why are YOU up?!”  
J “at t eh mongers home”  
T “who’s home?”  
J “mongers! As in THE TRIBE mongers. I’m at there place rn, think trollmarket but Draal. Times, like, a billion. it’s like Arrrg’s worst nightmare. here’s some ppiiiiccccsssss.”  
sent, many different pics of the place. Heartstone, mongers, and overall just the market and living areas.  
T “HOLY CRAP!”  
J “right?!”  
T “DON’T DIE!”  
J “lol I won’t. OH, BTW, I HAD THIS MASSIVE FEAST IN MY HONOR YESTERDAY AND EVERYONE, LITERALLY EVERYONE, WAS THERE AND I TOLD THEM OF MY LIFE AND OUR ADVENTURES AND SHIT. LONG STORY SHORT, THEY WERE ALL PISSED AT ME CAUSE I KILLED GUNMAR. SOMETHING THEY ALL WANTED TO DO. BUT NOW IM AN OFFICAL HONORARY MONGER AND EVERYONE LOVES ME”  
J “ooops sorry caps!”  
T “well, THIS woke me up. Whhyyy no pics?! D=”  
J “hard to take when I’m trying to NOT get my arm ripped off by mongers fighting over food. Draal comapred to all of them, is like comparing a master of table manners vs...well, Draal. it’s seriously night and day. OH AND THEIR LEADER, THEIR VENDEL, IS THIS MEGGAAA TTRROOOLLLL. Here lemme send a pic”

 

pic sentient

T “HOLY SHIT, THAT’S A TROLL?!”  
J “YEE!”  
C “good morning to you too boys. Wooooow! This shit is craazzyyy! WHY U NO INVITE US!?”  
J “i LITERALLY had spears HURLED AT ME when I was trying to come inside. It really is their greeting. LITERALLY, THAT’S HOW THEY SAY HELLO TO NEW PEOPLE!”  
T “HOLY CRAP”  
J “RIGHT?!”  
E “this just in, a gay nerd has been spotted in the conversation!. Morning! WOW! ALL THIS STUFF IS NEAT!”  
T “sweet! Our second gay has arrived! JIM, TAKE US THERE!”  
J “honestly, I don’t want anyone to die. I’M THE TROLLHUNTER AND THEY TRIED TO KILL ME! JUST TO SAY HI!”  
E “well, you’re not ded so thats cooool”  
S “oh god, speaking of ded, whyyyy is everyone uppppp? My phone keeps going off and I cant fall back to sleeeep now! Dope as place tho! Gemme a sword or something! ELI WONT SHARE HIS AWSOME SWORD”  
E “YOU HAVE YOUR OWN SWORD TO PLAY WITH”  
T “technically it’s not giant and flamming and made from a master troll blacksmith”  
C “Noten keeps trying to make me go to Jack in the box for him, get him something to eat. Why tf does he want me to?”  
C “nvm, dumb question to ask honestly”  
J “good cause I was gonna say”  
T “GUH, GUGHGHDNFDNSEJN”  
E “ohh! He speaks the gay code!”  
T “IM TIRED AF AND NOW I CANT SLEEP! THANKS A LOT JIM”  
J “=p”  
J “OHHH ELI! I FOUND YOU HERE!”  
E “huh?”  
J “okay, now everyone think of Eli. Really focus and think about him”  
S “thats different than usual for me how?”  
E “aww <3”  
J “now. Imagine if he were a small alpha monger troll. Yeah, he exists. His name…………………………………………………………...is Eu. Pronounced EW!. Anyways hes great! Hes nerdy and like, suuuper into memes and porn and hes awesome! Hes a tooootal looser too! it’s great cause I know that feeling and NOW im helping him get his own omega, AND learn how to fight! Long story short. Everyone picks on his cussseee he smol af. Is more into comp and internet. And has never had the self confidence to pretty much do ANYTHING. SO, CLEARLY I had to help. Now, he’s SUPER ENVIED!. it’s fuckin great and I love it. Now the bullies are like “oh uh...hey Eu...think we can like, hangout or whatever...” cause ME aka THE TROLLHUNTER is now his friend! He now just made the TOP of the list ‘coooooolllll person’ cause we hangin out!. Literally zero to hero in a single day! Like some disney thing!. OH GOD I SHOULD PLAY THAT SONG WHILE WE TRAIN XXXDDDDD”

 

S “i must meet this Eli troll!”  
E “I MUST MEET MY DOUBLE!”  
C “i gotta meet him! He sounds cute!”  
T “TROLL ELI MUST BE SEEN! I MUST SEE THE LOOSER FOR MYSELF! WE SHARE THE SAME BLOOD!”  
T “okay, a little tooo creepy”  
J “nah, which is WHY I TOTALLY took him under my wing!”  
E “wooo! Everyone here’s a looser except Claire and Steve!”  
S “?”  
E “you had friends and were popular! And Claire was pretty and had friends!”  
C “excuse me, WAS?”  
E “you know what I mean! POINT IS THE FELLOW LOOSER MUST BE MET!”  
J “think you wana see him today?”  
E “yee!”  
T “yee!”  
C “yee!”  
S “yee!”  
J “it’s decided. The looser shall be seen TODAY!. Lemme talk to him after our training, prob be a few hours or whatever. I actually have GREAT wifi here! Hence why I’m talking, no need to worry about bills! …..I hope”  
T “cool! So all meet up someplace and see him? BRING US THE NEW FLESH AND BLOOD”  
E “BRING HIM! I WANT TO SEE MY OWN TROLL REFLECTION!. OMG IS HE MY TROLLSONA?!”  
J “=O I d k!. Kk ttyl, he here, and NO PICS, =p, want him to be a surprise! Although I WILL give you this hint. If Draal is a king sized candy bar, Eu is fun sized. AND NO SHADOW PORTALS!”  
C “fiinee!”  
J “kk, ttyl!”  
……………………………………………………….

Walt was flipping through the morning paper, sipping his coffee. Barbara came in after a hot shower, something to help wake her up. She felt like sleeping later. Even if her body didn’t.  
“Morning”  
“morning” they spoke before a kiss. Walt flipped a page and asked  
“so, where are our lovely children at?”  
“out together, going to have a fun day as I was told! Jim’s was pretty excited”  
“good for her”  
“i hope he and Draal make it there safe”  
“Where?”  
“to...what did he say, OH! It was Draals home”  
“home?”  
“the mongers home-” Walt SPAT out his coffee and chocked a bit  
“h-he w-what?!”  
“is that...a problem?” some coughing, and wiping of his mouth before he responded  
“i...suppose not”  
“is Jim in danger?”  
“in a way,...yes and no”  
“is someone going to attack him or something?”  
“yes and no”  
“there’s no troll war going on there, right?”  
“oh HEAVENS no!. NO ONE dares to fight the monger tribe. Like taking a bat to a hornets nest. Only a foolish thing to do. Fought off Gunmar himself and won, all without loosing hardly any of them. About 50-1 I’d say. wasn’t there so I’m not sure. All I know is that they humiliated Gunmar and annihilated his army. They all laughed, cheered, and mocked him while he fled. Word spread like a virus and everyone heard about it. Gunmar never lived a single moment without wanting revenge.”  
“sounds like a very...dangerous group”  
“thing with the mongers, they rarely, if at all, leave their home. Nestled within a nice large mountain. Living under a blood red heartstone, they stay tucked away, all to themselves. If they wanted to go out and start a war, well, it would make Gunmar’s forces look weak. They could do some awful damage to most. Well, thankfully, they never feel like doing so. Ironic, since they’re all so battle oriented”  
“so what, they just fight and kill each other?”

 

“in the most basic, yes. It’s LITERALLY Draal but very very extreme. Draal is very tame and dull compared to his kin. Hardly ANYONE dares go NEAR them. The way they greet you is literally hurling weapons at you. If you survive and live to tell the tell, you prove that you’re worthy to be around them. They aren’t xenophobic, they just prefer the company of those that know how to fight and survive. So you can understand why they don’t have many visitors.”  
“so, they what, did that to Jim?!”  
“most likely so. he’s alive, so clearly they want him around them, plus being a trollhunter and being mates with Draal. Somewhat like his own special VIP backstage pass I wager.”  
“wait if they never leave, why is Draal here?”  
“they have a custom of the leaving and ‘returned’. They always stay with themselves. IF for SOME reason one leaves, it’s usually for a specific purpose. A monger will always return home, it is their one TRUE home, when they do, they all throw a celebration. To celebrate the ‘success’ of their goal, or if they failed, well it’s still a returning. Well, not EVERY thing is celebrated. If one leaves to, I don’t know, visit someplace of little to no importance and then return, they won’t bother celebrating it. Hm. I wonder what they’ll think of Draal. He’s been gone for so long and has made THIS his true home”  
“is everything going to be alright?”  
“outside yes, hardly ANYONE is willing to start a fight with a monger. So, the only real threat is within their own home. I pray Jim doesn’t loose a limb, there customs are. Well you know Draal. So it should be obvious. Funny, the safest place on earth is the same place that might be equally dangerous”  
“wait safest?”  
“like I said, NO ONE in their right mind would dare to stir them up. Or mongers in general. Our home is quite safe as well, besides myself and Jim, because Draal lives here. When a monger claims a territory, very few are willing to encroach on it or risk the wrath of said monger the territory belongs to. So, when others learn that this place is claimed by Draal, well it deters even the hardiest from assaulting”  
“should I call Jim? I really don’t want him to be in anymore danger than he needs to be”  
“no, it should be fine. I doubt they’ll kill him, on purpose at least. he’s strong, and he has Draal”  
“great, now I need to worry about Draal’s tribe killing Jim.”  
“like I said, he should be….fine?”  
“you sounded like it was a question!”  
“Draal won’t let anything happen to him, and Jim is..well...Jim. Between those two, they won’t have anything bad happen to them…..hopefully”

……………………………………………………

THUD!

Eu fell to the ground. Hard. Dust kicking up and pebbles skipped.  
“uuuugugghhhhh” he groaned as he spat out some rocks.  
“GET UP WHELP. I WILL TAKE A LIMB AS A REMINDER OF YOUR WEAKNESS”  
“Eu, you really should hurry and get it! that’s his SERIOUS voice! He really will!” Eu gasped and crawled as quick as he could, turned into a ball and moved. At least only a bit away before he unrolled and passed out from pure exhaustion….

The morning had been…..physical. Draal was allowed to train Eu for the time being, which actually was: ‘i want to beat him to near death so he understands how much pain he can tolerate and then slowly start to build up a resistance to it’. Jim let him, much to Eu’s horror, who of course begged no. Jim said that he would make sure to reign Draal in if he goes too far or gets too intense. Eu needed this though, Jim didn’t want to hold his hand for everything. Most things, but not everything. Jim gave support where support was needed. The other parts, Eu had to figure it out himself. He needed to eventually learn not to rely on others to help him. He would become great! He would become a legend! that’s what he wanted!. So the path must be difficult, so it will be easy. Eu really did understand what that meant. To truly work as hard as he could, slowly add more difficult challenges for him to overcome. When he learned how to do it properly, he could walk the road easy. Being reminded here and there, help him stay on the road and head forward of course. Eu said he wouldn’t give up, give in, no matter what! If he wanted his dream life, he would break himself to achieve! (even if he actually didn’t want to and heavily implied he didn’t)

 

Jim was wiping some dirt off the now awake and aware Eu. The three had decided to take a break for the time being  
“you did amazing sweetie!”  
“ugh...you sound like my mom...NOT THAT I’M COMPLAINING!”  
“don’t worry pumpkin, you’re going to be a master soon enough”  
“I’m not a child! I am a man!” Draal snorted and laughed hard  
“YOU ARE A WHELP! HARDLY A TRUE WARRIOR!”  
“mate, be nice. he’s….right though….BUT you’re doing soooo much better than yesterday! You couldn’t hold a sword, now you can swing, hit your target, doge by rolling!...even if you fall, and have finally gotten comfortable wearing your light armor!” a bit of browsing and they decided a nice thick tough leather, flexible of course. Studded with rivets to keep it from snapping or falling apart. A simple mace, smooth but with a molded head to have four sharp sides (Eu was too afraid of getting any that had spikes on it)  
“thanks. Yeah I have! At least a little bit”  
“and each step is still a step, you’re already level 2, on your way to level 3”  
“really?! You think so?!”  
“yes!”  
“yay!”  
“i think we should be done for a while. I have a special gift just for yo-” a troll had unrolled and they quickly and happily shouted (even if he was right next to the three of them)  
“MY TROLLHUNTER, THE OLD MAN WISHES TO SEE YOU!”  
“ow. My ears. Alright, what’s he need?”  
“HE SAID IT WAS IMPORTANT INFORMATION YOU MUST LEARN”  
“okay, uh, can they come?”  
“NO! IT’S A SPECIAL MOMENT FOR YOU AND YOU ALONE!”  
“ow. Okay, well, I guess I’ll see you both later” Eu looked nervously to Draal who was cracking his neck and knuckles  
“you leave the whelp with me. I’ll make sure he becomes a true man”  
“uh...j-jim!”  
“mate, let him rest. Unless you’re going to teach him non physical things that will hurt him”  
“then I will teach him how to mate. I know a specific moan and face you make that I will explain to him-”  
“NO!. NO details about ME!”  
“aw...fine. Then I shall explain the monger courtships. Other than the fighting. There are others”  
“really?”  
“yes, I erh...did...not do them to...you”  
“how come?”  
“we….mated and then the next day held our event...forgive me...i should have done the rest of the courtship parts. It is...hmm...monger romance you could call it”  
“oh, well you can still do it~”  
“no. we are already mated. Forgive me for failing you.” Draal snorted and lowered his head in shame. Jim went over and tucked his own under Draal’s  
“hey, don’t be like that, you never failed me, besides, I didn’t exactly do human romance to you. I plan on doing it, and you do yours”  
“then I shall! Now then, Eu. When an omega and an alpha really like one another and the omega goes into heat-” Jim shook his head and grinned, his mate with such a doofus….

……………………………………………………..

“ah. Jim, trollhunter, kin. You’ve received my summons” the loud voice boomed through the heartstone. Jim wished he would have brought earplugs, or SOMETHING to help dull the noise.  
“yeah, he was...loud...and excited...”  
“good. I must start to explain and show you our home. Since whelps born and raised here are already taught throughout the years, we do not truly have a...hmm….proper education system? I think that would be the best way to explain it. Well, no matter. Come! I will show you our home!” Jim had to quickly tuck and roll to avoid one of the spear like spikes from shredding him as Jurl turned around quickly, with surprising speed for someone so massive. The two walked the monger home together, Jurl speaking loud enough to be easily understood, even with all the noises around them. He talked about their tribes history, which was mainly about the usual monger lifestyle, killing, fucking, and fighting. It WAS interesting to hear about the very few parts that weren’t about those subjects. Like the way they found the heartstone, settled into the mountain, carved and shaped it all to fit their needs. The ages that passed and the more they grew and adapted. The beings they fought off, the battles they’ve won. The most humiliating defeat they gave to Gunmar!. In a truly interesting way, this tribe were very unique, they weren’t JUST a single thought or style, they had their own intricacy within it. 

 

Like their tattoos, they had specific events only they endured, earned, witnessed, experienced, and more. Mongers who were involved with things no other troll tribe had. The actual love and affection, so sweet and gentle in their hearts. Beyond the fighting and sex and killing, there was a special love that no one else had. They were all a family, they loved one another, even the most grudge bearing trolls, deep down, they wouldn’t want to leave each others side when it came down to it. They all laughed and cheered and involved every event of their lives with one another. They made sure no one was a stranger to each other. Like Jurl, they all tried to memorize each other, a bond no other could create. With other trolls, they just didn’t make bonds as deep as these. Trollmarket, a hub of mass living and trade, but hardly anyone knew one another. Perfect strangers walking around each other. Here, here each monger could name each other, and their history, more or less. Jurl told Jim that he’s going to be getting EVERYONE’S attention, literally. Jim of course said that he was going to have a hard time learning and remembering everyone. Jurl chuckled and added that he already assumed that. Everyone would. Jim felt a little stupid hearing that, Jurl patted him (hard enough to literally knock him off his feet) and said that none of them know each other at first glance, it took them a while to learn one another. Not only that, but Jim wasn’t a full blooded monger, so no one expected him to memorize every detail like they had.

 

Speaking of details, each truly remarkable creator had their own little styles, down to the tiniest detail. Creators of every kind. Leather, food, weapons, armor, love gifts, home decorations, trophy cleaners

(THAT job had some serious business into it. A good one would have their work cut out for them. Everyone searched for someone who was a pro. Some mongers even had to wait their turn on a list just to get their trophies cleaned and polished! Apparently polishing a skull of a creature twice your size isn’t the easiest thing to do)

Tinkerers, wood carvers, stone sharpeners, proper weapon repair, gem cutting, mining equipment makers, and even botanical care taking. Some mongers enjoyed flowers apparently! Although THAT was rare, so not many of those stalls existed. Jurl finally lead Jim outside and onto an overlook. The sun showed brightly through the openings of the clouds. The cold wind seemed to lessen, and a strong silence overtook the area somehow.  
“lastly my trollhunter. This. This has been with us since the very beginning. A place of upmost importance. One that we could truly never live without. It is our thinking rock.” Jurl motioned his large arm over to said rock. A fairly large one with a somewhat smoothed out surface to sit on  
“uh...okay?”  
“sit! Sit!” Jim did as was instructed. Yep. It was a rock he was sitting on.  
“yep”  
“this is where each one of us comes to sit and think”  
“about what?”  
“whatever we need to contemplate about. From simple things like should I use the larger ax or the larger sword, in what way should I pleasure my mate this evening, should I have eaten that last piece of goblin bladder, to the meaning of our own very existence in life itself, what is our placement in the grand scheme of life. What is our truest role to play out on the stage? What makes a sentient being sentient. WHY do we exist? What purpose is there? Each tribe, being, culture, everyone, has their own beliefs, ideas, their own morality, their own views. Who is to say who is right and wrong? If there truly was a single answer, wouldn’t we know by now?. Trolls think heavily on this, almost as much as humans. Almost, but not completely. One thing we DO believe in our home, is that this place right here, is sacred. The silence that somehow creates itself, the calm wind, the sunlight shinning through the clouds and lighting up all around us yet not in THIS specific spot. Plus there’s a nice rock to sit on. So, we make it our thinking rock”  
“huh, I can see why this place is so important”  
“indeed it is. Many times, more times than I can count, I have stayed here and thought. I would think and think and occasionally take a break to crack somethings skull, and then come back to think some more. One time, I spent the entire night here. I watched the sun fall, the moon rising, the stars shine, and eventually the rise of dawn. It was all very inspiring. Then I ate my morning human”  
“human?”  
“yes, they are quiet good. You should eat one. Hmmm, I wonder what YOU taste like. Half human and half troll. Interesting. You don’t mind if I take a bite or to, do you?” Jurl chuckled and licked his lips. Jim genuinely wasn’t sure if he were joking or not  
“that’s a joke right?”  
“maybe. Hehe, well, now then, onto the next thing!”  
“next thing?”  
“yes. To get you suited”  
“suited?”

………………………………………………

Jim sat on a bench. Unsure how to feel. He was….excited? Also just, unsure. Currently he was having his measurements done, to have his own battle kilt thingy crafted just for him. IF he is going to represent his new tribe, he’s going to have to start talking, acting, looking, and LIVING as a monger. Jim is...hesitant...but...also interested. This is an entirely new life. It was HIS new life. Another thing to explore, add, experience. Draal was happy, well that’s a very low way to say it, he was thrilled that Jim was becoming more like his new kin. Jim felt a little….nude. Being shirtless (he was told they tried to cover the least amount of their bodies as possible. To be able to flaunt and show off their scars and wounds and tattoos) and having many mongers nearby watch him, or at least look at him while moving on with their own life. Jurl did say he was going to be getting a LOT of attention, he just assumed it would be like trollmarket. The occasional high five, the hello, the little chatter. No, with this, they all watched and talked and mumbled directly at him. Little social anxiety was building up. He was allowed to personalize his very own kilt! They showed him various animal parts/skulls/fresh kill/ and whatever gore related things that had on hand to him so he could choose what he wanted to have put onto it. He just wanted as basic and ‘less decorated’ as possible. A nice way of saying, he didn’t want to walk around with fresh kills and death around his waist.

He had it finally made! He wanted to be as simple as Draal’s, which caused his mate to be happy AND give a really good excuse to go bare minimum. They wanted him to take off his pants right then and there, try it on. He felt a bit awkward as they all watched him. He asked if they had a changing room or...anything...to give him a bit of privacy. They didn’t really understand. Privacy was understood, however, everything was just always out in the open. You could walk around naked and no one would bat an eye. Draal chuckled and stood behind him, blocking most others views, who booed a bit, Draal just roared back at them. The crafting was actually a bit difficult. Jim was the most slim out of all of them, even other omegas and children were thicker, if only slightly. But they managed to make it perfect!...sorta...it did chafe badly, being really tough leather, they wanted it to be like that, after all, soft things wouldn’t exactly protect your junk from a sharp ax or sword. They made it nice and lighter, much more smooth and soft. They didn’t see exactly why, buuut Jim had the excuse of ‘I’m the trollhunter! I have my own armor so...no need for anything heavy!’ so they didn’t argue any further.

NEXT was something Jim REALLY wasn’t sure of….a nose ring!. Pretty much they all had one, there was little reason not to. Draal talked to him softly and quietly, making sure it as for Jim and his ears only. Jim said he didn’t know how to feel about piercings. Draal said it was fine, his two were completely find. One for his nose and the other…….Jim liked to play with it when they were having a bit of fun alone~. Nothing says fun like toying with your mates cock piercing in a more teasing manner. Jim decided, hey, what the hell! His body heals pretty quickly! And it was JUST a nose ring, so, why the hell not? Worse case, he doesn’t like it, takes it out, and his nose heals. Of course, he needed to be clean so nothing ‘bad’ would happen. Well, he bared his teeth and, one quick pinch and it was done. A little blood and that was it. Jim had assumed it would hurt like his tattoos. Nope! It was hardly anything. He picked out another simple thing, although it did match Draal’s, another excuse to not go over the top. NOW they tried to convince him to REALLY ‘tat him up!’ Jim passed, he REALLY didn’t need any more tattoos….

 

As Jim and Draal walked around, Jim felt awkward, all eyes on the couple. Draal wouldn’t stop staring. Looking at his mate, his new monger mate.  
“you look absolutely breathtaking”  
“thanks, I feel...weird...”  
“it will pass. Humans are so fickle with their forms. You look wonderful, don’t be ashamed of your own form”  
“I’m not...well...no...but...i just feel a bit...uneasy with literally everyone looking at me”  
“They are excited. All of them know that you still need time to adjust and settle into your new home. No one will force themselves onto you, no one will truly bother you for the time being”  
“Well, that’s helpful to know...hey...i...I’ve been thinking...maybe we should go somewhere private...actually...it’s...about our home...let’s go there...i...need to talk to you about it” Draal’s expression turned serious. However it was quickly shifting from hope, worry, disappointment, acceptance, more hope, and more worry. Draal just nodded and grunted in reply…

 

……………………………………………………….

“mate...this place really is….something else...it’s...incredible in it’s own way!. I really...like it here. I want to get to know everyone, well I’ll try. I want to help Eu and Braz and well, maybe other mongers too. I want to show who I am to everyone. I want to have you happy. This home really is nice, and a LOT bigger than our house...in..Arcadia...plus since your mom’s moving back here, it would be easy to visit, she’s been bugging me to visit, so I guess I don’t have any more excuses not to...haha...i just...i can’t...live here-” Draal closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. Then slowly let it out through his nose  
“i...understand” the fleeting hope in his heart, snuffed out. He did know better though. Still, it’s always nice to hope”  
“I wasn’t done...uh...well I can’t live in Arcadia-”  
“you wish...to be without a home?”  
“noo! that’s kinda what I’m trying to say. We could live in both places!”  
“i...do not follow...we cannot be in two places at once”  
“well, we sorta can!. Like, I mean, eventually we would have to get our own place. Everyone leaves their parents house eventually and hey, here we are!. I’m saying, let’s live in both places. We stay a month or two in Arcadia, and then the same amount here. And we go back and forth, that way we still have our friends and family and both places and nothing really has to be negative” a sudden massive hug was given by Draal. Jim almost couldn’t breath from it being so tight and strong.  
“i am so in love with you, I would leap off the steepest cliff and into the deepest cavern below it just from you telling me to. I would accept any choice, like I almost always do. I thank you so much that you’ve given this to me, no, US!”  
“l-let g-go b-b-ig g-g-uy”  
“OH sorry, sorry”  
“of course, we need to make our house, cave whatever, into a TRUE home! I’m going to need some of my stuff, plenty of nest building material, including some of my favorite blankets and stuff, indoor plumbing IS A MUST! I used the monger homes….bathroom...i don’t want to be stuck up but I am NOT going to live here if I have to use it. I also need a shower of course, TV and a place for video games and well, electricity in general. Internet is covered by Eu so I no doubt he’d let me make it my go to thing. Some of our stuff from home of course, and well, that’s off the top of my head. Oh we don’t HAVE to get anything right now, I’m just saying of what we do need to get in the future”  
“when in the future?”  
“in the near future, just, whenever I guess”  
“AH! I UNDERSTAND!”

Jim’s phone went off and a message from Eu popped up in their little chat  
“okay, so Draal, I’m taking Eu with me to visit everyone in Arcadia! And trollmarket and Blinky and Arrrg and of course Vendel too, also I wana show him the heroes forge and stuff. He did say one time over a message that he wanted to say proper goodbye’s to Kanjigar, since he can do to the actual...well...him, I’m going to take Eu to do it. Did you want to come with?”  
“i shall stay here and start right away on building our home! If that’s alright with you”  
“sure, knock yourself out. Alright, I’ll talk to you later”  
“goodbye my mate”  
“goodbye my mate”

 

…………………………………………………………

Eu couldn’t stop bouncing on his toes. Jim and him were going to visit everyone! EVERYONE! JIM’S GANG AND PARENTS AND FORGE AND EVERYONE! When Jim told him about the fun surprise, Eu almost fainted. The second he was told, he ran home, cleaned himself up, grabbed his laptop in his metal briefcase, and ran to the gyre and waited for Jim to start it  
“okay I’m here sorry about that, had to finish up with Draal”  
“ohhhh you look awesome!”  
“huh? Oh! Yeah I forgot about this...BRRRHHHH! it’s so cold!”  
“yeah it is, it’s so nice and warm and bloody smelling at the home!”  
“geez! My nips….uh anyways okay let’s go. Hop in”  
“don’t worry! I have a barf bag!…..9 actually”  
“good to know...okay...hmm….i think it was this o-”

 

………………………………………………………………….

Toby stuck his hand through his hat and made It show through another  
“tada!” Eli clapped his handsome  
“coool! how’d you do that?!”  
“trade secret” Steve rolled his eyes  
“also a mirror”  
“Steve!”  
“what?”  
“you’re not supposed to tell anyone! It ruins the trick” team trollhunter and co, aka Steve and Eli, all hungout in Toby’s room, talking and waiting for Jim and Eu to arrive.  
“okay okay okay, now, pick a card!”  
“oh god”  
“Steve be quiet! Eli loves this!”  
“let me have this Steve” as Eli went to reach for a card, Claire checked her phone  
“cool, Jim’s home, let’s go see this mystery troll”

 

…………………………………………………………………..

Eu was barfing horribly into his bag right, collapsed on his knees on the stairs to trollmarket  
“you gonna be okay?” Jim asked patting his back. Eu just gave a weak thumbs up in reply.  
“need me to get you anything?”  
“n….n-no...I’ll..b……….be f-fi-ne”  
“wow you really DO get sick. You try to take medicine? Human stuff doesn’t work on trolls really, but maybe it might”  
“d….doe….doesn…...n’t h-he….lp”  
“maybe Vendel might know something”  
“t-the o-ld man...kn-ows everything…..h-e c-can’t hel-p me”  
“well, Vendel does know a lot about troll medicine. You good now?”  
Eli dry heaved one last time before nodding his head.  
“o...oka….ay..I’m….good….” he cleaned himself up and his moth with a bunch of water and tic tacs. Jim opened the door open, and the two stepped inside  
“whhaaaooooo! it’s so….soothing…..wow….”  
“yep! Totally passive huh?”  
“uh...huh….mmh..i feel so warm and soft! Maybe THIS is my real home! I’M KIDDING ANCESTORS! I DIDN’T MEAN THAT FOR-”  
“relaaaxxx nothing is bad, and even if they were, they knew you’d be joking...i think...anyways, let’s show you around!”

 

Eli would stop every few steps just to take pictures, selfies, and video recordings.  
“this...place...is...amazing! Sooo many different trolls! And no one’s had sex yet! I don’t even see or hear any fighting and cheering!”  
“yeah, things are usually pretty chill around here”  
“awwww maaaaannn I’d love to have my own bad ass cave here! Totally make it all cooool!”  
“well, nothings stopping you”  
“pfffttt, my stomach, my tribe, and Braz now. NOT THAT THAT’S A BAD THING! I’m just saying, not really easy to just stay here suddenly...whaaaooooo the heartstone! it’s so...soooffftt!” Eu ran his hands along the walls as the two walked deeper in  
“Vendel, you here?” the voice of the old troll goat was heard as they walked into the room  
“where else would I be? A retirement home?”  
“nah, you’d actually get to relax, and everyone knows that’s impossible for you”  
“I’m surprised to hear you speaking troll-OH!” Vendel put down what he was tinkering with and turned around, suddenly caught off guard by Jim’s sudden change. The old goat couldn’t help but come close and look him over  
“my. You certainly have...changed”  
“what? it’s just the kilt thingy and my nose ring, wait trollish?”  
“yes, you’ve been speaking it the entire time.”  
“really? Huh I didn’t even notice it. I guess I’ve just been speaking it all day yesterday and today that it just sorta became default”  
“well, I must admit, you are getting quite better, almost masterful, in the sense of a very very very small child”  
“haha very funny”  
“now who’s this….monger? Huh”

 

Eu rubbed his arm  
“i know. I’m small...”  
“hmm”  
“Vendel this is Eu, Eu, Vendel”  
“Oh wait YOU’RE VENDEL?! COOOOOL! Jim’s told me alllll about you! And also what the old man’s told me! He says you’re pretty decent when it comes to knowing the very basics of everything and that you’re scared of your own shadow! Wow! You DO look like a goat!”  
“hmpfh. Well mannered as any monger.”  
“oh..uh...s-sorry...i...uh” Vendel sighed  
“so, Jurl is doing well I take? And no. I am not afraid of my own shadow. Huh, I honestly don’t know if I should be surprised that Jurl is still around.”  
“yeah, he is, and he’s as badass as ever! he’s like, so big! But, I really can’t tell. He was always massive when I was little, and as I grew, well he’s STILL big. So maybe he DID grow more? Well anyways IT’S NICE TO MEET YOU! OHH CAN I HAVE AN AUTOGRAPH!?” Eu forced a pad of paper and a pen into his hands  
“I suppose so?”  
“amazing! Thank you!”  
“As you can see Vendel, Eu is….excited to be here. Alright, next stop, Arrrg and Blinky”

What WAS supposed to be a short walk, ended up being a long one. The constant stops and Eu wandering off caused it to take far longer than needed.  
“-nd not do such a thing!”  
“sorry...”  
“don’t you pout! Stop making that face! Arrrg you-”  
“hey Blinky, hey Arrrg, you decent?” The trolls turned to see a wide eyed and thrilled Eu who wouldn’t stand still  
“AHHHHH YOU’RE EVEN MORE AMAZING IN PERSON! JIM’S TOLD ME ALL ABOUT YOU AND HOW WONDERFUL YOU ARE!” Blinky smiled and was about to speak when Eu ran by him to go to Arrrg  
“you’re so amazing and big and fluffy!”  
“thank you…..who?”  
“Eu”  
“ew who?”  
“no Eu me not who you”  
“No not Eu, who you not Eu you”  
“noo Eu me not ew who you you am I Eu!”  
“I am not Ew! I’m asking who you”  
“I know! I’m trying to tell you my name is Eu!”  
“oooooohhhhhh…….huh?” Arrrg was bewildered and horribly confused. Jim just patted Arrg’s large arm.  
“oookay, Blinky, Arrrg. This right here, his name is Eu”  
“ohh you Eu not ew you me ew” Blinky was just watched, baffled at this….is it even a conversation? Blinky collected himself and tried to start a new conversation. One that made sense.  
“to what do we owe the pleasure of having you both in our company?, as well as your new image master Jim”

 

(look. I’m not gonna write out a whole scene okay? I don’t need to keep repeating what I’ve already said. XD)

Jim explained what’s been going on. From the very first step into the home, to this very moment

Blinky took a mental note and then replied  
“I’ve heard only small tales of the monger tribes leader. Jurl does seem like a very imposing troll” Eu was still as energetic as usual  
“he is! he’s huuuge and scary and amazing too!”  
“Yeah Blinky he’s pretty big, he makes Arrrg look like your size”  
“ha. ha. How humorous.” the four heard a groan and turned to look at the source. Dic was walking along, touching the wall  
“oh goody, guests. No wonder I had the sudden overwhelming sensation to suddenly be bitter and sarcastic” Blinky rolled his eyes and turned to his brother  
“when is that not the usual attitude you repeatedly-I’m not going to argue. We have guests. This is my Blind Bitter Brother. I generously allow him to live within our loving, sweet, home. And he does nothing but whine and complain”  
“that’s not true! I also am sarcastic!”  
“hey Dic”  
“hello trollhunter, it’s good to hear your youthful voice. So young and naive. Makes me remissness about my own youth. I remember teaching my brother to read” Blinky walked over and helped his brother find his seat  
“those were good moments. Well isn’t this a surprise? A moment of genuine kindness?”  
“well I DO like to give them from time to time...huh...who’s this...” Dic started to feel and sniff  
“I’m Eu! it’s nice to meet you!”  
“oh goody another monger...oh..wait...Ballustra isn’t here...is she?” Dic suddenly started to panic  
“Nope! Just me!”  
“oh good. I was worried that she found out-nothing of importance. First Kanjigar and Draal, then her, and now you? Why the sudden excess of your tribe? Oh no. don’t tell me, you’re finally starting to go to war?!”  
“Dear brother to be fair, Kanjigar, rest his soul, and Draal came here when we ALL came here. As for Ballustra and her….arrival….that was to be….expected...”  
“expected?! Did you know something and for some odd reason forgot to share it with me?!”  
“i only meant-IT’S NOTHING OF IMPORTANCE! Why are we even talking about this?”  
“just like it was nothing of importance when some of the books had a strange sticky feeling to them and not so ‘clean’ smelling?” Blinky looked to Arrrg who looked back like  
‘oh fuck, I told you we shouldn’t’  
“we will discuss this no more!”  
“why? Because I’m….what do the kids say…..addressing your name to the open public?” Eu was trying not to laugh this entire time  
“the term is actually: calling you out”  
“yes, that. Thank you young monger who I greatly hopes doesn't suddenly wish to cause trouble. These old bones can’t handle anymore danger”  
“oh please! Arrrg is older than either of us and he’s perfectly fine!”  
“HE’S not one of us! he’s a brute! Born and honed to be Gunmar’s wonderful hound-”  
“wait whaaaa? What do you mean hound? And what about Gunmar?” Jim had to step in  
“hey, Arrrg Blinky let’s take Eu down to the heroes forge! I promised I’d show him! Along with me in a little training”  
“AHHH YES PLEASE LET’S DO THAT!”

 

a nice distraction to forget….

 

Eu was kneeling before Kanjigar’s form. Looking up and speaking softly  
“i hope you rest well. We all miss you. I’m sorry for never having the courage to speak to you, at least once. Jim’s super awesome though! we’re all taking him in and treating him well. The old man’s really hurting, not being able to see you. You know how much he loves each and everyone of us. I’m not blaming you though! You were busy and it’s not like your job has any vacation days or whatever. Well, Draal’s been teaching me how to be an ACTUAL monger, alpha, warrior, that sort of thing. Your son is great, nooo one mocks him anymore. If anything EVERYONE’S SUUPER JEALOUS OF HIM! Mostly because He’s mates with Jim, BUT also because of all the cool stuff he got to do. He’s really lucky to have Jim. Awesome he chose us though, right?! Our second monger! Even if Jim’s not our blood, we still love him like family. I guess that’s all I have to say really. Well, good..rest? Alright I’ll let you go now….why did I say it like I was in a call...okay uh..yeah...bye?” Eu stood back up and looked over to see Jim being looked over by Arrrg and Jim. Arrrg giggling  
“hehe monger” while Blinky was studying Jim’s nose ring and his new wardrobe.  
“your trollish is becoming remarkably well master Jim”  
“thanks Blinky. I feel like its a looot easier since I’ve just been speaking in it for so long”  
“practice makes perfect! Arrrg stop playing with his nose ring”  
“hehehe”  
“so what do you two think of Eu?”  
“he seems-”  
“hey guys! Okay, I said my goodbyes and stuff! So, what was the thing about Arrrg-”  
“HEY! BLINKY, SWITCH ON THE FORGE! LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS!”  
“OHHH YEEAAAAAAAASSSSSSS! I’M SOOO EXCITED!” Eu’s mind suddenly snapped back to the present. No thoughts as to anything but  
‘HOLY SHIT LOOK AT JIM GO! AAHHHHH FIRES AND BLADES AD MOVING STUFF! WHOA LOOK AT DEM SICK FLIPS!’

after a good few minutes, Jim decided to call it quits.  
“okay! So E-” Eu ran up to him and just started to freak out  
“WOW YOU ARE SOOOO AMAZING! LIKE SERIOUSLY IT’S LIKE WHATTT! AM I REALLY GOING TO BE ABLE TO DO ALL THAT?!”  
“no, well, not EVERYTHING. you’re mostly likely going to be fighting like Draal”  
“AHH I WANT TO WATCH HIM AND YOU FIGHT! HOLY SHIT! THAT WOULD BE SOOOO DAAAMMMM COOOLLL! I MIGHT PASS OUT JUST THINKING ABOUT IT!”  
“please don’t” Jim grabbed a towel and some water and started to clean himself up and re hydrate!. He checked his phone and noticed it was getting a bit later than he thought it would have been. Well, Eu did want to sight see…..  
“alright! You saw me in action! Ready to go see where your hero rests his tired head?”  
“AND GET TOTALLY PLOWED BY DRAAL!”  
“well yeah, that too”  
“wait...we...don’t...have to take another gyre….right?”  
“nope! Just a walk”  
“COOL!”

 

……………………………………………………………

The walk went exactly as you would have expected. Eu wouldn’t stop gasping and more videos and pics and selfies and wandering off. It took almost twice the amount of time it would have taken just to get home. Finally they came. Jim really wanted to show the scenic route (also it would keep them from the buildings and other people so Eu wouldn’t get as distracted) and they came into Jim’s backyard  
“WOW YOUR HOUSE IS AMAAAAZZIIINGG!”  
“well, it’s just kinda a regular human house”  
“STILL!”  
“this is were Draal and I spar sometimes”  
“AHHHHH”  
“over there is this little family garden we grow”  
“AHHHHH”  
“this is the backdoor”  
“AHHHHH” Jim started to chuckle at that. The two walked in, the tiny giggly talking and gasps from Eu were heard  
“ahhhhhhhh!”  
“eu, breathe, you look like you’re about to explode”  
“ahhhhh!”

 

the two walked in to a nice relaxing scene of Walt and Barbara watching a movie  
“hi swe-OH WOW...you are...different” Jim smiled as Barbara stood up and looked at her son who hugged her  
“i got all monger-fied”  
“what?”  
“well, I’m one of them now so I guess I look the part a bit more”  
“sweetie, I don’t understand”  
“you atlas, you’re speaking trollish”  
“oh! Oops! Sorry, Started to become my default I guess, haha….uh yeah! I’m more monger now and that behind me is-”  
“AHHH I’M EU AND YOU’RE SOOOO AMAZING!”  
“Eu can you speak in english?”  
“huh, oh I’M EU AND AHHHH YOU’RE SO AMAZING! JIM TOLD ME ALLL ABOUT YOU BOTH! YOU’RE HIS MOM AND YOU GAVE BIRTH TO HIM AND RAISED HIM AND YOU’RE AMAZING!”  
“oh, well aren’t...you excited”  
“CAN I HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH?!”  
“uh….sure? Do you hav-okay you do. No one’s ever asked me for one before”  
“THEN THEY’RE ALL DUMB! YOU’RE THE TROLLHUNTERS MOM!”  
“yes, I am, uh, it’s nice to meet you Eu. Jim’s told me about you, at least a little. I guess you’re the one hes mentoring?”  
“I AM AND IT’S AMAZING!”

Eu turned to a chuckling Walt  
“AND YOU’RE WALT! YOU’RE THE CHANGELING!”  
“yes, I am both”  
“wow! you’re almost not entirely revolting! NOT MY WORDS THAT’S THE OLD MANS! I think you’re cooool! I don’t care if you’re a changeling or not!”  
“that’s….kind. Who is ‘the old man’?”  
“oh he’s the Mongers leader. Everyone calls him the old man, cause he’s like, the oldest or whatever”  
“ah, that does make things a bit more clear”  
“JIM IS SHOWING ME HIS LIFE AND SHOWING ME HOW HE WAS A TOTAL PATHETIC ZERO THAT HARDLY ANYONE CARED FOR AND THEN BECAME HOW TOTALLY DOPE HE IS!” Jim smiled  
“Gee, total pathetic zero that hardly anyone cared for. Thanks Eu”  
“no problem!...OH YOU WERE SARCASTIC! I’M SOSOSOSOSO SORRY!”  
“nah, it’s fine.”  
“THIS IS YOUR HOME! LIKE YOUR HOME HOME HOME! THE PLACE YOU SLEEP AND EAT AND LIVE AND HAVE SEX IN!”  
“yep, all of the above. So, if you promise me you won’t pass out or explode, I’ll show you my room”  
“AHHHHHHHHHHHH”

 

a little walk upstairs and Eu wouldn’t stop freaking out. Although at this point it shouldn't be surprising  
“Well, here it is”  
“AHHH YOUR ROOM! YOUR NEST! YOUR DESK! YOUR BACKPACK! YOUR BOOKS! YOUR PILLOWS! YOUR VIDEO GAMES! YOUR LAPTOP! AHHHH THAT’S THAT PLACE YOU AND DRAAL SLEEP! AND HAVE SEX!”  
“yep, that’s all true”  
“I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M SO LUCKY TO BE DOING THIS!!!!!!”  
“well, believe it”  
“AHHHHHHHH” Jim texted Claire saying they were home, they’d come out in a sec  
“okay, before we meet my friends-”  
“AHHHHHHHHH”  
“-want to see where all of Draal’s weapons are at?-”  
“AHHHHHHHHH”  
“-it’s in the basement-”  
“AHHHHHHH”  
“….with a door”  
“AHHHHHH” Jim couldn’t stop laughing, Eu was so excited at everything.

 

As the two walked the basement, Eu was being his usual self, he even reached out and touched the handle to one of Draal’s ax’s, only to scream and beg for forgiveness for doing it. Jim told him to calm down, it was fine!. Jim then announced that the part where Eu’s going to love, well more than the rest, was now! Meeting Jim’s friends! Eu looked like he was about to explode and die. Jim told him to calm down.

………………………………………………………….

“Steve be quiet! Eli enjoys this!”  
“let me have this Steve” as Eli went to reach for a card, Claire checked her phone  
“cool, Jim’s home, let’s go see this mystery troll”  
“aww I didn’t get my card!”  
“we can get you one later, don’t you wana see your trollsona?”  
“YES!”  
“then let’s go”

 

First thing they noticed, the troll next to Jim, second thing they noticed, Jim looking like his twin. Eu was doing his usual excitement gasps, meanwhile Jim (who now was getting into the habit of playing his his nost ring) greeted his friends casually  
“Hey guys, how’s it going?”  
“Whoa Jimbo! What’s with the new look?”  
“is it REALLY that different? Its just a nose ring and a kilt...thingy”  
“what?”  
“i men that’s all that it is, it’s not like I’m totally different”  
“what?”  
“It’s pretty easy to understand”  
“what?” Claire rolled her eyes  
“Jim, you’re speaking in trollish”  
“OHHH oops! Okay uh” Jim cleared his throat and started to talk in english again  
“oops! I’ve been talking all day In it, started becoming my default I guess, haha. Anyways, check me out! I’m all monger now! Guess I gotta start representing my tribe now!”  
“tribe?” Eu and Eli went up to each other  
“is this my human/troll me?” they said at the same time  
“haha we spoke at the same time”  
“now it’s scary”  
“okay! Do you REALLY have like, the same interests!?”  
“okay, I’ll stop talking and you go”  
“no you I-” Steve rubbed his face  
“OH MY GOD THAT’S ANNOYING. ELI GO, TROLL DUDE HUSH”  
“I’m Eli! it’s nice to meet you!”  
“SAMMMEEEE! And I’m Eu! Yes, like Ew. Dumb name”  
“it’s alright, my full name is dumb! So do you like anime?”  
“WHO DOESN’T?!”  
“what’s your favorite kind?”  
“say it together on three. One two three”  
“giant robot anime over the top fighting ones”  
“AHHHHHHH!” everyone watched in bewilderment as the two nerded out to one another. Steve felt a little...unsettled  
“It’s like a mirror...” Toby added  
“a troll mirror..or..human...” Claire and Toby turned their attention to Jim who walked over to them  
“so how do you like my new look?”

 

As Eli and Eu nerded it up, Jim went into full detail of his new little ‘monger life’. Steve couldn’t take his eyes off his boyfriend and his troll twin. Eli pulled out his sword and Eu gasped and cried  
“AHHHHH I WANT ONE! WHERE DID YOU GET IT?!”  
“Jim’s mom in law”  
“WHHHAAAAAATTTTTT BALLUSTRA MADE YOU THAT?! WHYYYY?!”  
“she finds it funny, she thinks I’m cute, like, a little dog. She said this was my new toy AND IT’S ALL BADASS!”  
“AWWW JJIIIIMMMM I WANT ONE!” Jim smiled as Toby kept toying his his ring  
“well, to be fair, she was the one who made it without being requested to”  
“wow Jimbo, you’re really embracing your new troll stuff”  
“is that...bad?”  
“no way! Troll it up! You do your thang!. So, when are you going to take us there?”  
“NOOOOO. I do NOT want any of you to die!”  
“aww come on! Like we would die”  
“DO YOU NOT REMEMBER ABOUT THE SPEARS I JUST TOLD YOU ABOUT?!”  
“well, we can shadow portal there, yooouuu put in a good word for us, and we’re gtg….right?”  
“i...honestly don’t know...uh...maybe? I don’t want you two to suddenly be thrown into a ring and fight to the death”  
“well...i mean….it’s okay, I promise to make your death quick Claire”  
“oh, hell no! Like YOU can kill me?! I can totally kick your ass!”  
“whhaaaatttt I have A GIANT WAR HAMMER! And you have a magic twig!”  
“YOU WANA FIGHT!?”  
“BRING IT ON!”

“i missed you two”  
“seriously though Jim, take us there! I want to see this place for myself!”  
“uh...eh….maybe...tomorrow...”  
“maybe?”  
“look, we haven’t even made our place yet. When we get indoor plumbing and YES WE NEED IT. You do NOT want to use the mongers, anyways when we get it I might...take you there”  
“Well, it’ll be awesome! See a whole new troll place!”  
“yeah Jimbo! See Draal’s kind! I am actually kinda curious to be surrounded by a shit ton of Draals!”  
“it’s….well...hmm….okay. I promise I will try and prevent your deaths, but they miiiiggghhhttt not listen to me”  
“well, if the giant troll dude says we can stay, we can stay! If everyone listens to him, then we can make sure we don’t die!”  
“true….”

 

the three turned to see Steve trying to stay as far away back as he can while Eli swings his sword around like a maniac, while Eu claps and cheers him on. Jim snorts  
“okay, I suddenly have a bad feeling about them. Maybe having them meet wasn’t such a good idea”

…………………………………………………………….

It was late now, Eu and Jim had to go back. Well, Jim could have stayed and waited for Draal, but he knew Eu would and could NOT travel back alone. If he couldn’t start the gyre, how the hell is he going to actually drive it. Also without keeping himself from not throwing up horribly. So the two said goodbye to everyone, Eu and Eli already started to constantly text the second they walked away. Well, Jim was happy to have Eu meet someone with so much stuff in common with. After a short ride back ‘home’ and giving Eu a few minutes to overcome his tremendous sickness, they came back. Jim shined his sword to signal the guards NOT to attack them. He made that little arrangement before they left, so they knew not to just start hurling weapons at them and potentially killing them both. Eu was tired and headed home, he said his goodbyes, gave hugs and waved. Jim had to make him promise that he wouldn’t cause Eli to start bad habits, like suddenly wanting to attack everything with his giant sword while Eu kept cheering him on. Eu promised. Jim looked out at the night sky, so filled with stars and bright. When he looked back at the monger home, he noticed something he hadn’t before, it was so….alive. He knew it was, but seeing it at night was so...different.

The heat and sounds and lights and being so active, it made it seem….cozy. Walking out of the cold and coming back inside, the warmth and smiles, the familiar voices of friends and family. The love and cheers. It really did feel like a true home…..

Jim figured that Draal was still working away like a busy bee on their new monger house, cave, living area, whatever you wanted to call it, so Jim headed right over. Entering the entrance to it he was astonished to see the inside. It was…..done. The walls had things hung and nailed. Tapestries hung and dropped down from various places. Furniture of all kinds decorated each room. Even vases with fresh flowers in them were here and there. The entire place was….furnished.

“Ah, my mate, there you are. I thought that might have been you” Draal said gently as he came In from a different room  
“Draal...how...”  
“i told you, I would get this done”  
“how…...so…..fast?….and….with ALL of this?!”  
“my mother also provided assistance. Along with many others”  
“others?”  
“yes, you are our trollhunter. We all wanted to make you feel comfortable in your new home. Do not worry, I personally approved or disapproved of every object presented, I knew you would only enjoy the clean things, as well as least used and things of your own taste”  
“this is all...amazing”  
“I’m happy to hear that”  
“you even built in a kitchen!?”  
“yes”  
“and a bathroom?!”  
“two”  
“so like, every things...working?”  
“yes, every single detail has been done. The water is fresh and filtered, everything runs smoothly, not a single problem to even consider. I have checked over and over and perfected every little piece of our new home”  
“Draal this is really something else”  
“I’m happy to hear your approval”  
“THAT’S OUR BEDROOM!? IT’S MASSIVE! THE NEST CAN HOLD LIKE, THREE OF YOU!”  
“well, I did want to give you plenty of room to build and create to your hearts content. Do not worry, we will move other belongings of ours into here, these are all just what we’ve brought into here. We can change and move things as you or I enjoy”  
“this place is huge! it-” Jim stopped as he looked into a room right next to their own. It was filled with various small weapons and toys. Little comfortable things and books. It was…

“is that….a...child's room?”  
“it is”  
“why?”  
“when we….have our own. I wanted to have it prepared”  
“oh….it’s….wonderful….” Jim suddenly felt a little...gloomy  
“I’m sorry Draal...mate”  
“for what?”  
“you want a child. I don’t..not...yet at least”  
“like I’ve spoken before, I will wait for as long as need be”  
“i just….feel...bad. Seeing all this work and effort….i feel like it’s just going to waste...and it’s my fault”  
“it is not your fault. If you’d like, I can remove it”  
“no, it’s fine”  
“are you sure?”  
“I’m….not...actually”  
“i will remove it for the time being. I do not wish for our home to cause you distress every time you look into it. We can simply make that a spare room, perhaps one for others to live in when we have them over”  
“yeah...I’d….like that”  
“well, think of it no longer. Come, let’s eat!”  
“eat?”  
“do not worry, there is a human city not far from here, I have already retrieved food”  
“wait you have?”  
“i knew you wouldn’t want to eat our food. Or am I mistaken?”  
“NOO! you’re totally correct! I was just caught off guard”  
“i want to make sure you’re happy here. I will do whatever it takes to make that happen”  
“thank you”  
“you are welcome. Now then, I’m sure you’re hungry! Tell me of your day. I quite enjoy what you look like, perhaps I’ll take your kilt off for you later”  
“ohhh~”

 

……………………………………………………………….

A nice little diner, a nice hard fucking

(one of these days, I will write. Maybe I just need to read more porn, but then I’m afraid I’ll just end up copying it by mistake!!!! )

And getting cozy. Jim laid on Draal’s chest, slowly drifting off to sleep. Draal whispered about feeling like a kid, being able to listen to the sounds of their home. Jim closed his eyes and did the same. Draal was right. It was surprisingly comfortable. It was fairly quiet from inside their cave, but it was still a nice ambiance. The sound’s of metal on metal, faintly little clinks and tinks, the sounds of voices talking and laughing. The warmth and sounds of fires. Everything really did feel like a true home…..


	19. A very happy sappy lovey dovey day!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a day of love! and sex! and remembering! and promises! and mockery! and getting into trouble with the law!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAHHHH LATEEEEEE!!! i know DX I'm sorry! life tho, you know?
> 
> anyways, i HAD to write a special!!!! too good to pass up!!!!!
> 
> =D i hope everyone had a great V day, if not, same here! well, enjoy!!!!!

A cool sunny day, fresh air from a recent rain. The smell of fresh flowers filled the air. Toby, Claire, and Jim stood in a park watching the clouds go by and enjoying their day. Suddenly Jim gets tackled by none other than Draal! Who is frantically looking in every direction. He hold’s Jim as close to his chest as he can while searching all around him drastically.  
“Hey big guy, what’s going on?”  
“come! I must take you away! As far away as I can! We must put you within a safe space!”  
“why?”  
“have you forgotten about tomorrow?!”  
“uh...what?”  
“the day of your human affection!”  
“oh, Valentines day, what about it?”  
“i must protect you from it’s dangers!”  
“what dangers?”  
“the assassin!”  
“uh, what assassin?”  
“THE ASSASSIN!”  
“specify please”  
“every year on your affection day there is a small invisible humanoid assassin that goes around and targets others with his bow and arrows! shooting directly into his victims hearts! I have made a safe place for you to be within! We shall stay there and await until the day has passed and the assassin lurks around no longer! Banished until the following year!”  
“you mean cupid?” Draal quickly put a hand over Jim’s mouth  
“SHH. Do not speak the assassin’s name! Else we draw his ire!” Jim pushed Draal’s hand away from his mouth and giggled  
“Mate cup-”  
“HUSH! We must flee! Goodbye two the both of you! I shall not be defending either of you! I must protect my mate first and foremost! I hope to see you both alive the day after!” before anyone of the three could speak, Draal rolled into a ball and left with Jim….

…………………………………………………….

Jim had hurled his lunch up earlier, but still a bit dizzy. How Draal did that all the time Jim had no idea. Actually, a LOT of trolls did that sort of thing. Maybe their bodies are just used to it. Jim currently laid on his back in a large makeshift nest he quickly threw together. He and Draal were now underground in some surprisingly large cave Draal created for them both. Somewhat of a small safety bunker somewhere underground. Apparently the large troll had been working on this little ‘project’ for quite some time now. Being a paranoid alpha, needing to protect his mate and his possible child in the future.  
“Mate, whyyy can’t we just stay in our room?”  
“NO! that’s where he’ll expect us to be within!”  
“what about the monger home?”  
“no! Even their, he could easily sneak past everyone with his invisibility and strike you down!”  
“he isn’t real!”  
“yes he is! Why else is he spoken aloud so much and shown everywhere?! The warnings are clear and I will NOT let this tiny creature steal your life from your body!”  
“cupi-” a hand covered Jim’s mouth, with a very paranoid and nervous Draal shushing him. Jim rolled his eyes and pushed the large hand away  
“HE ISN’T REAL! he’s like santa! He is just made up!”  
“LIES! Your greek mythology speaks of the divine being! He is everywhere at once! I will NOT allow him ANY chance or opportunity to take you away! I will not rest or let my guard down ONCE until tomorrow has ended!” Jim laid his head back on the ground and rubbed his face. He closed his eyes and breathed in. Once again Draal was going to the extremes. Well, he really always tried his hardest to be the best mate he could be. This was sweet in a way. Jim’s attention came back when he heard loud scraping. He looked up and saw Draal push a large boulder in front of the ONLY way in and out. Draal dusted his hands together and smiled, turning around and sighed joyfully  
“there. You are now safe my mate. Do not worry, I shall even avoid rest and watch over you until the day is done”  
“MATE! YOU JUST PUT A BOULDER IN FRONT OF THE ONLY WAY OUT!”  
“yes! The perfect defense!...unless...HE’S ALREADY IN HERE! SHOW YOURSELF! BE KILLED BY MY HAND!”   
“MATE. NO ONE’S IN HERE BUT US!…...HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO LIVE IN HERE?!”  
“worry not my mate. I have already prepared for this outcome. Here, we have more than enough food to sustain the both of us for at least an entire week” Draal pulled and dug through some stones to reveal a large room filled with…..garbage and canned foods.  
“UGH MATE, WE CAN’T JUST EAT GARBAGE!!”  
“i made sure to acquire only the healthiest kind. As well as your favorite pineapple cans”  
“okay. Fine. What about sleep!?”  
“you have our nest already built. Is it not comfy? I shall fetch us more materials if need be”  
“how?”  
“easy, I will simply go home”  
“okay. Do so.” Draal nodded and turned to the exit.  
“there is a boulder in the way”  
“YES I KNOW THERE IS A BOULDER IN THE WAY!”  
“i…..might…..not be able to move it…..again”  
“you did it before!”  
“i….may….have placed...many kinds of…... adhesive upon it...”  
“WHAT!?”  
“i wanted to make sure it would be impossible to move! So that the assassin could NEVER reach us!”  
“WHAT ABOUT OXYGEN!? WE NEED TO BREATHE!”  
“worry not, I have created more than enough air holes and various small tubes and cracks, too small for anything to pass through, and big enough to supply endless amount of air for us to breathe”  
“okay. What about water?”  
“there is a natural large pool of water this cave creates over there”  
“okay, what about showers?”  
“the large pool of water once more”  
“okay, what about a bathroom?”  
“ah, have no fear! I have dug a very deep hole for us to use”  
“...you….dug….a hole...”  
“yes! Very deep! Would you like to see it?”  
“I AM NOT RELIEVING MYSELF IN A HOLE!”  
“why not?”  
“I AM WAY TOOOOO SPOILED TO DO SO! I NEED A TOILET WITH PLUMING!”  
“ohh relax! I was just making a jest! I have already created a perfect indoor pluming system”  
“really?”  
“yes, I swear on our love”  
“okay...then you’re serious….alright, now what?”  
“now...we wait...and potentially mate~ if you’d like” Jim groaned and fell on his back once more. Rubbing his face then ran his hand through his fur. Well. If he was stuck, might as well do SOMETHING to pass the time. He sighed in defeat  
“sure. Why not.” Draal smiled wide, a lustful growl built up in his throat, all while undoing his kilt.  
“this is NOT A REWARD BY THE WAY. I’m still mad at you. What about electricity? My phone? I’m too spoiled not to use it!”  
“we have service as well as internet here. Oh, also a generator with various plugs”  
“wait really?”  
“yes, over in that room”  
“okay…..wow….good reception….wait HOW did you set all that up?!”  
“my mother, as well as Eu”  
“okay that makes sense. Alright, come here big guy” Draal gave a nod as he kicked his kilt away

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As a little loving holiday treat, I’m going to write a little smut! Yay! Three times! First, those two, then Eli and Steve later on, then Blinky and Arrrg even further in the story. Well, I’ll try not to be repetitive! Also, those who don’t have someone to love (I’m in that boat, but I’m fine with it. I got porn and other shit!) think of this as a little treat to help ignore all the sappy shit. Wait, I guess you can’t since this fic will have sappy shit…..well shit….okay, nvm about that. Just ignore it. Well I guess you can’t ignore it since it’s the whole fic. Unless you skim it just for the smut. Then idk what to say. Enjoy?

 

 

 

 

 

Draal’s cock was as hard as it could be. He growled deeply in lust as he crept on all fours to Jim, who purred back in return. Jim’s eyes relaxed and spoke in an equal tone  
“i don’t think there’s enough room here for the both of us. Guess we can’t have sex”   
Draal chuckled, then cooed  
"you'll make enough space for me won’t you?~" 

"I suppose I could make enough space for you~ and if there’s no room left. I’ll make you fit~" "i very much enjoy this talking. It makes my loins awaken and stir for you even more so. Mmmhhh~”   
Jim’s alpha crawled over until he was above his form. Draal licked Jim’s neck and growled a bit into his ear 

Draal couldn’t resist. He had to have Jim. The omega pushed Draal off of him, saying how  
'he doesn’t want to rip anymore cloths' so Draal waited impatiently while Jim undressed sensually. The bulls large member twitched in anticipation for what was to come. He grabbed it and made a slow squeeze and jerk. Then played with the cock heads ring piercing, one that matched his nose. 

The blue troll snorted in agitation and spoke with a scowl  
"your sexual body movements and your lack of speed for taking off your cloths do not amuse me. I hunger for you now!"  
"what? don’t want to watch me strip for you?"   
"no." Draal said plainly. He grunted afterwards and huffed through his nose.   
Jim giggled out  
"alright alright big fella. Don’t make that mad face. allll naked, see?. Now, why doesn’t a certain big alpha come claim his omega~”  
"beg for my whelps first~”  
"well, that does really get you going, I guess I can give you a special treat for the holiday….mmmhh, knock this omega up. Let me give you the whelp you want. Come ravage me, and make my body yours to own. Seed me deeply so our child can grow. Let my womb be the kindling to a roaring flame that will be our kid. My body aches for you to fill me up. Come and fertilize my eggs, let my body do what it was made to do. Put me to work on making what you want. Please, give me the honor of having the fruits of your loins. I want to be the mother to your whelp~...there, like that?”  
"mmmhh....that will suffice..." Draal pushed Jim into the nest. Jim growled in response, then made a biting motion at Draal. Said alpha smirked and lifted an eyebrow  
"ohh? someone's trying to be aggressive to their alpha? well I suppose yours will simply have to show who is the dominate one."

Jim bit Draal all over, licking the marks afterwards. Draal kissed and licked Jim’s slim body, then their mouths met, making the two share a nice kiss.  
Jim purred out  
"mmh..getting better at kissing"  
"I’m glad this gives you pleasure. I do like to practice, just for you~"

With that, Jim suddenly pushed Draal’s head away from his body, then made a small whisper roar and scratches his alphas chest and arms, kicking him off gently. Draal chuckled and looked at the tint of excitement in Jim’s eyes  
"someone wants to fight. fine, I'll make sure to win. Then I get to collect my spoils of victory" "to the victor goes the spoils~but I won’t let you win" Jim said as he jumped out of the nest. Then squatted across from Draal, Making a little butt wiggle and licked his fangs. Draal stood on his hands and feet, then lunged at Jim. Jim only laughed and let Draal tackle him to the ground pinning him back underneath him.  
"do not consider me weak trollhunter. You'll be the trollhunted soon enough. Forced to slow down and protect yourself more as you develop my whelp within you" Draal growled out in an angry tone, trying to be seductive~”  
"oh? well I’m not easy prey. So if the big troll 'hunter' wants to hunt the hunter, you'd better make it count. I don’t plan on giving in too easy"  
"Wait I’m confused by what you said”  
“oh uh, well, I’m the trollhunter. You want to hunt me. you’re hunting the hunter”  
“ooooooohhhh okay...were was I...oh! don’t want to give in easy for me? not even from my powerful  
presence?" he bit gently into Jim’s shoulder and growled in dominance. Jim moaned and whined for his alpha  
"n-no. I’m not...nngh...goin..g...to give in…"  
"good. I love a fight. give me a challenge. Let me work for my prize"  
"I was going to say the same"

Jim grabbed Draal’s horns and flipped him off, causing Draal to land heavily with a thud onto his spiked back. Jim jumped onto his chest and growl whispered again. Biting motions in the air, signaling his 'strong prey fighting skills'. Draal grinned in amusement  
"well well, someones REALLY asking for a good beat down. I’m going to put you in your place. You're going to be so submissive to me, you'll constantly whine at the mere sight of me"  
"prove it. alpha~"

Draal suddenly grabbed Jim in one strong arm and held him tightly to his chest. Rolling off his back and sitting up. He threw Jim into the nest and climbed up over him  
"there. better. a true alpha ruts his omega into his nest. lets see if I don’t rip it to shreds from my savagery"  
"what a proper alpha~. If we had more room in here, I would have body slammed you."  
Draal chuckled deeply  
"oh I highly doubt that." He bit into Jim’s chest and shoulders once more. Digging his teeth in just enough to make marks  
"submit. Omega." Jim whined in pleasure  
"uugnnn n...n...never...hh~"  
"submit to your alpha."  
"nnnghnnn n o...no"  
"submit. Beg for me to mount you. Beg for me to allow you the pleasure of bearing my whelp."  
"really is your top turn on huh? Well I wont ever submit to a beast like you!"  
"this beast is claiming you. Give into you desires and beg for me to rut you"  
"ha! I’d rather let some ACTUAL monger mount me!"  
"ohhh now you're playing a dangerous game. I would watch that mouth of yours if i were you" "don’t like what I have to say? then I guess you'd better put something in it to shut me up"  
"and miss out on all those pretty moans of yours? a real alpha makes sure the omega screams and moans with all their heart, begging for more, for their alpha to continue. I’m going to rut you so much, all of trollmarket will congratulate me on my finest work"  
"that’s AHHHHhhhhhh nnghh! i....i...s...sub...n..NO NEVER..…" Draal was running his tongue and nipping with his teeth down his mates chest and lower belly.  
"ah AHHH"

 

"submit to me, and I’ll allow you the pleasure of having me give you the only orgasm you'll ever need. No other alpha will even dare cross your mind after I’m done with you"  
"lets seeEEE just hOOW good you aHHHH are. All of troll market? that’s a pretty big check your mouth is writing, can you cash it though?"  
"i...i do not know what these are actually...." Draal suddenly stops from confusion  
"oh well they are this sort of currency people use, look it doesn’t matter, the point is, can you deliver on your word? or are you swearing to something your honor couldn’t do."  
"ohh my honor is the LARGEST you'll ever see"  
"you sure? I’ve seen plenty kuberas before. Now THOSE are studs. Arrg comes from good breeding stock. I hope I don’t have to leave you for one of his species. mmmmh I bet a hundred of you couldn’t even match a single one of them"  
"ohh now you're just making me angry."  
"good. I like the aggression. I guess you should use all that anger for something....productive"

"huh?...oohh!...haha! I get it! because my seed will go inside of your womb and then your womb will be 'productive' in creating my whelp!" Draal stopped and laughed. Jim sighed  
"yes Draal. That was the joke. Well I’m glad you at least understood it at this time"  
“wait, when have you made that joke before?”  
“no I meant-Never mind! Focus!”

Jim started to bite into Draal once more, his chest and arms started to become littered with them.  
"my my. You sure do like to bite and cling. You omegas all have such a lovely idea of foreplay" "wait we ALL do? I was just doing it cause....I don’t know, my brain thought it would have been sexy" "yes, it is common for omegas to bite and claw. and yes, it is quite sexually arousing indeed” Jim suddenly stopped. Closed his eyes and laid his head on the ground. He slowly opened them and looked into Draal’s.  
"Draal...sorry I don’t mean to ruin the mood but....do you love me?"  
"of course. With all my heart, my soul and body. You are the only one I will ever desire. I chose you. Out of all the many trolls I’ve ever been around. Only you caught my heart."  
"I don’t know but...i...i just....had to make sure....sorry"  
"do not apologize. If your heart wanted to make sure, I’m more than happy to help it understand. But now I must ask...you weren't being serious when you spoke of...other alphas…"  
"no of course not, I was just trying to be sexy. That’s a thing with alphas right? well humans get turned on when they 'degrade' them. In the sense of trying to 'get them pumped up' by saying how they might take another lover if the alpha isn’t good enough. its just foreplay stuff, i would NEVER take another alpha. I only ever want you"

The two shared a smile. Then touch foreheads quietly for a moment. Draal spoke softly  
"now. With our hearts calm and bodies riled up, let us create a whelp"  
"mmmh yeah..let’s~”  
"as you wish, I hope you are no longer on your medicine~"  
"wait...are you serious about 'making a whelp'?"  
"yes. of course. I want a son”  
"wait like...now?...like...now now?”  
"yes. I thought you were finally desiring to start our family... do you not..want to?"  
"Draal I just...I still don’t feel ready…. I DO want a child with you! But like I said... just maybe...not right at this moment. It’s just such a big thing and we don’t have any baby cloths or plans or cribs-"

Draal put their foreheads together and hushed him  
"shhhh. Relax yourself. If you are not ready, then it isn’t meant to be at this moment. let us mate, and enjoy our time"  
"okay...yeah...sex...let’s sex it up! sorry I’m...getting off track"

"let us not think of that, let us begin!" Jim nodded and they shared another kiss. Draal moved off of Jim a bit and then grabbed his hips, lifting them, causing Jim to gasp. Draal stretched Jim’s ass apart and then pierced the pink hole with his tongue.  
"aHHH" Jim cried out in surprise. Draal moved his large tongue in and out, wiggling it around while Jim squirmed. Draal chuckled as he noticed just how much it made Jim squirm. Draal’s nose ring brushed up against Jim’s taint. The cold metal added to Jim’s sensations, making him produce heavier gasps. Draal wiggled and 'tongue fucked' Jim. An easy way to lube up. plus the fun sight of seeing his mate go through a slurry of pleasured faces. Jim was in awkward heaven. Having the big organ writhing inside of his body, stretching him out from the inside and feeling the warmth and wetness, caused him to become disoriented. He tried to focus, but faltered from the pleasure. He saw Draal giving a perverted smirk and chuckle. Jim’s toes curled a bit and his hips humped at the air. He suddenly felt cold and empty as the organ left his body quickly just as quickly as it had entered. He gasped and looked at his alpha. 

"now. I believe that should be slick enough for us to continue. So. I used my mouth on you, now its time to return the service."  
"th-that sounds only f-fair" Jim’s world was suddenly spun around, being pulled under Draal, who turned and moved, now letting Jim be face first into Draal’s crotch. His cock twitched in excitement

Jim purred eagerly as he eyed his prize, the large thick member was hard and hot. The stiff member twitched in excitement. knowing its mate is about to give it a nice warm wet hole to be in. Jim moved his head up and kissed the shaft. getting a throb in response. Jim purred out a quick  
"mmmh, i love you" Before he began kissing and licking it, slowly working from under the mid shaft, all the way to the tip of the head, rubbing the knot simultaneously. Draal himself made purrs of pleasure. However, feeling the agonizingly slow pace, those purrs turned into groans of displeasure. He huffed and bent his neck down to look at his mate, who turned his own head in response and wiggled his eye brows. Draal frowned and groaned out  
"please. He aches for you"  
"well, he can be patient. As can you."  
"i do not want to be patient. I want a hole"  
"and you'll get one. You know I like to play with him" Draal looked worried a bit hearing this.  
"Please. I need this"  
"ohhh look at you, suddenly the big alpha is begging the omega.”  
“i do not beg! i ache!”  
"well we never did resolve who won...and....who lost" Jim said as he pushed the head downwards and let it stiffen back up. Draal groaned again, Causing Jim to tease him more  
"hmmm, i sure do have two warm. wet. Horny. holes to fill. mmmh. so hungry. so needy. if only i had someone to 'fill' the emptiness in me."  
"erg…"  
"whats wrong? is something the matter? want to talk about it?"  
"you know what the matter is! do not force me to open you up myself!"  
"aww, what fun would that be. now lets see...mmmh..." Jim put a finger in his mouth, sucked it until it was plenty wet, then traced along the shaft from the tip and trailed it all the way back down to the knot. causing Draal’s body to shiver.  
"as your ALPHA I command you to be obedient!"  
"ohhh so someones throwing around the alpha excuse? aww, now how is a poor little omega like me supposed to resist such a big strong alpha~?”  
"you DO NOT RESIST. NOW PLEASURE ME OMEGA"  
"well, someones getting rowdy and impatient.....submit to me"  
"what?!"

 

"i said. Submit. to. me."  
"no! never! YOU submit to ME"  
"well as i see it, as much as i want this thick, meaty...girthy...mmmh....alpha.....inside of me, there’s just something telling me to make you suffer and wait." Jim said as he blew how air onto the top. it leaked a bit of pre. Something just pressed his tongue against the urethra and licked it up slowly. Draal groaned and shifted above Jim a bit, his breathing growing ragged.  
"mate. submit. and I’ll do whatever you want."  
"no. YOU WILL SUBMIT OMEGA!"  
"i didn’t before, and I wont now. It’s MY turn to have YOU teased with pleasure. Unless-"

Jim didn’t have time to finish that sentence. Draal suddenly sat up and rolled onto his back, grabbing Jim and pushed his dick into his mouth, force feeding It to him.   
“mmmh...no more talk now...this is what your mouth should be doing instead" Draal said in pleasure as he slowly pushed Jim’s head more, filling him with more dick.  
"mmhmmmm that’s a good omega. pleasure your alpha like you’re supposed to" Draal closed his eyes and took a deep breath through his nose. He opened and looked down at Jim now sucking submissively. He tried to pull off, but Draal would push him back down on it, deeper even. After a bit of 'forcefulness' Jim got into it for good. He slowly took inch by inch into his mouth, and throat. After ‘training’ with the big guy for a while, hes learned to master how to properly do this.   
"mmmmh. nice~" Draal moaned out, watching his mate suck and bob. Truly making a perfect rhythm. Slowly, pulling up, then going back down, deeper every time until he went all the way to the knot, stuffing everything into his throat. Jim began to purr, causing the vibrations from his throat to affect the shaft that occupied it.   
"ahhHHHhhhh. wonderful. mmmh, good omega. That’s nice. and for the record. i am the winner."  
Jim stopped and began to quickly pull off when Draal stopped him  
"no no no. I didn’t say to stop. I’m in charge." Draal pushed him back down slowly. Jim tried to grumble, but that didn’t do so much since he was stuffed.  
"no arguing. I was the victor. You submit to me. Like you should. and that’s that.” Jim glared up at him with angry eyes  
"mgmmhmmjjgfg"  
"is that a no you’re trying to say? hard to understand you with a lot of cock in your throat"  
"mgfhpft"  
"complain all you want. You are loving this, even more than i am"

He was right, he had a major oral fixation, ever since he practically lost his gag reflex from his transformation. Jim closed his eyes and savored the moment. The whole thing was made even better as Draal pet him and ran his hand through Jim’s fur. Causing Jim to purr in response, which caused vibrations in his throat, which caused the pleasure to amplify. A nice little pattern.  
Jim wanted to take his time. What his biggest turn on was 'worshiping' Draal. His omega nature screamed at him to be submissive and do whatever his alpha wanted, along with his own personal enjoyments. His body felt raw, sensitive, unprotected. His alpha seemed to be the only comfort and protection he could feel at various times, this was one of them. Jim challenged himself. each time, to take more cock into him faster. Up he would go, right to where only the tip was between his lips, which made Draal put his hand onto Jim’s head, making sure he didn’t try to pull off, then slowly go back down. Inch by inch. warm wet slurps, purrs, and moans.  
Jim could taste the pre coming out faster and in larger quantities. Jim had a small secret, he became addicted to his mates cock. Especially when he was in heat. He felt like his world revolved around the big alpha. sticking his tongue out and running it up and down, wiggling it and running it onto every possible place he could.

eventually the entire shaft became one big sloppy, slippery, wet member. The pre started to leak heavily. Suddenly the petting stopped. The hand on top of Jim’s head, instead of keeping him down, was pulling him off. The shaft was released from Jim’s throat and pulled out of his mouth. It twitched heavily, almost painfully, going from such a tight warm wet space, to the open cold air. strands of saliva and pre connected Jim’s mouth to the dick. Jim opened his mouth and tried to lick and put his 'addiction' back into his mouth  
"now now. eager one. that’s enough tasting for you"  
"but i want more! i want to submit! please Draal! i need it in me!"  
"mmmh, that’s more like it. but no, no more for you"  
"please!"   
"beg all you want. However you wont receive it...but i enjoy your begging." Jim tried to move his head, opening his mouth and reaching with his tongue, It yearned for it. His throat quivered in excitement to have the thing it loved back within it. Jim would lick his lips, trying to remove the strands that connected the two things. his mouth, and the dick he so heartily desired.  
"no."  
"please! alpha!" Jim looked up and gave big puppy dog eyes. He made whines and moans for it. Draal chuckled and shook his head no in response.  
"that’s not the end where you'll get your 'prize'"  
"but i want to swallow!"  
"no. my sweet omega, your receiving end is the one where it leads to you womb." Draal pulled Jim onto his chest.   
"now beg omega"  
"please"  
"please what?"  
"please! give me your whelps! how am i supposed to bear your young if you don’t give me the means to make them!"  
"mhh....hunger for my seed?"  
"Starved of it!"  
"submit?"  
"yes! yes! this omega submits to the mightiest alpha! the only alpha I'll let claim me! the only alpha I'll whine for! the only alpha I’ll give a whelp to! I’m your territory and yours forever! please, give me your pleasure, give me your alpha hood, let me prove my fertility and submissive side!"  
"mmmh...perfect…" Draal pulled Jim’s hips down, riiight above Draal’s dick. It rubbed itself on Jim’s ass. Jim whined and moaned in his throat in response to the action.   
"please, please please!"  
"mmh...who’s the alpha?"  
"you!"  
“and the omega?"  
"me!"  
"who are you mated to?"  
"you!"  
"and who do i love?"  
"me!" Draal lifted Jim’s hips up a bit, then slowly inserted himself. Jim gasped out and moaned heavily. Draal’s member was plenty slicked up now. with Jim’s 'tongue fucking' it made it even more slippery. As with Jim’s throat, his ass took Draal’s cock inch by inch stopping right above Draal’s knot. It was thick and Draal was proud of it. Then pulled out. Then eased up into him yet again. The repeating process sped up, opening Jim up more and more. Having the large member slip in and out with far more ease. Jim could finally place his hips against Draal’s. 

The room was filled with pleasured noises, grunts, moans, groans, gasping, and everything in between. Draal was coming close to finishing, along with Jim who was pleasuring himself as Draal was the one guiding his both their hips.  
"b-beg. for whelps"  
“this really is your biggest turn on. I need them! fill me! breed me! use your omegas body to make a family!"  
"a-and t-then what?"  
"then I...uh...mother your whelp!"  
"mmmnngghh!" Draal grunted and snorted heavily. Slapping Jim down faster and harder, holding him like he were a fleshlight.  
"yes! yes! fill me! big alpha stud! breed me! make me your territory!”  
"NNGHHH" Draal fucked Jim harder and made short thrusts into him, then finally, he slammed hard enough he fucked his knot into him with a wet pop. Jim practically screamed in pleasure at the sudden massive thing entering him all at once. Draal roared as he pounded his orgasm deeper into Jim, trying to fuck as deep and as hard as he could. meanwhile from all the overwhelming sensations, Jim was shooting his load all over Draal’s chest. Both their orgasms lasted for a few good, hot, intense moment’s. After all that pressure built up, it felt incredible when it finally released itself. The two bodies eventually grew less tense, slowly became relaxed. Jim laid against his alpha. Moaning and cooing in bliss and pleasure. He didn’t care, or notice, or both, the absolute sloppy sticky mess that was being made between their two bodies from his own orgasm. The cum spread itself around, the last bits dribbling out of it, making it messier. Draal’s knot hardened to its maximum, making it impossible to pull out, not that either of them cared at this point. Both truly were just one big hot mess. 

 

Draal pulled Jim closer to his chest, draping his arm across Jim’s back. Jim tucked his head under Draal’s chin. The blue bull’s eyes could hardly be kept open. The warmth, the bliss, the fuzziness, the tides of absolute pleasure that surged throughout his form made it difficult not to fall asleep. the pure joy of knowing that he has successfully pleasured his omega to his full expectations made his euphoria even greater. Only a proper alpha makes sure their mates sexual satisfaction is always met, or even go beyond. Something Draal always took pride of. Jim too was fading in and out. Eventually just going into a half sleep on his alphas chest. He didn’t care about the knot currently stuck inside of him, re arranging his guts, or the stickiness, or the 'soon to be sore' warnings. He was too high with ecstasy to care. The only motions either one was making, more then heavy breathing obviously, was Draal slowly petting his mate, causing some final quiet purrs in response. The two of them quickly fell asleep, not taking very long to do so. Before sleep fully set in, Jim had to talk just a bit more  
"Draal…"  
"...yes…"  
"I love you"  
“I love you too” The couple officially passed out after that. Going into a deep sleep. Eventually the knot softened itself enough where it finally pulled out of Jim, causing a quick breath through his teeth and groan in his sleep……

 

…………………………………………………………..

It was valentines day now! Claire was eating breakfast in her home. Mid bite she saw Noten come into the kitchen. He wore fake wings, a diaper, a sash, and little devil horns.  
“ayyyeeee sis! how’s it goin?”  
“why are you dressed like that?”  
“the holiday! Feels weird wearin a diaper again”  
“whats with the horns?”  
“ayyyeee love is hot and spicy! Plus, it ain’t all holy and pretty haha”  
“making something the most perverted, why am I not surprised”  
“sooo what are YOUR plans today? Gonna get some hot sauce on that taco of yours?”  
“OH MY FUCKING GOD….also is that racist?”  
“nah, it’s just a saying. Alright, you getting a hot meaty sausage up on your-” Claire threw her spoon at him, nailing him right in the eye and knocking him off the counter”  
“OW! WHY’D YOU DO ME LIKE THIS SIS?!”  
“STOP PERVING OUT IN HERE! ESPECIALLY WHILE I EAT!”  
“fine! don’t get that puss a proper wreaking!”  
“do I have to get the dog carrier again?”  
“no! Fiiineeee! I’ll stop.”  
“good.”  
“kill joy..”  
“what was that?”  
“nothin!”  
“mhm….well, for your information, Toby and I are going out on a fun friend date”  
“ohhhhhhhh reallllyyy?”  
“yes. We don’t have anyone, so why not each other! Best friends celebrating!”  
“uh huh”  
“i WILL throw you into that carrier.”  
“alright alright!….best friends...oh wait, where’s our sweet sweet Jim?”  
“i got some texts from him...well….”

 

………………………………………………………

Steve was laying on his bed, flipping through some of his magazines. Totally not porn. He stopped as he got a text from Eli

E: =)  
S: =)  
E: Wut we doin today?”  
S: ?  
E: do you not remember what today is?”  
S: yesss!!! it’s your B day!  
E: I hope you’re joking  
S: of course!...it’s….Valentines day!  
E: did you have to look it up?  
S:….no  
E: soooo since you clearly don’t have plans to romance me, I have some ideas for us. DO. NOT. GO. EXTREME!….again…  
S: I never do that!

 

(in all honesty. He did. Steve was only ever a combination of two things. 1: god awful at romance. And 2: he always overdid it. An entire room full of balloons, an entire stack of chocolates, a bed full of stuffed animals, and so on)

 

E: anyways, come over! And bring food! I’m the only snack in this house! DX  
S: yum. I’ll be right over  
E: good! And get ready for some lovin!  
S: am I getting laid?~  
E: no  
S: awww  
E: lol, fine  
S: yesss!!

……………………………………………………….

“Eli is your door open?”  
“yes mom it is”  
“I’m going to leave now, you’d better not be doing any hanky panky!” Steve cracks up  
“HANKY PANKY?!”   
“shut up Steve!…..okay mom, we won’t”  
“promise me!”  
“…..okay….i promise” Steve pouted  
“aww”  
“you calm down. Bye mom, I’ll see you later!” the boys watched the car pull away and drive off. Steve clapped his hands together   
“OKAY! HANKY PANKY TIME!”  
“no”  
“awwww why not?!”  
“i promised my mom not to”  
“WHAT?!”  
“i keep my promises”  
“BUT BUT BUT-”  
“no. no where’s my food?”  
“ugh! it’s in my vespa.”  
“don’t be so grumpy. I never said I wouldn’t use my mouth” that perked Steve up

 

After some talking and eating, relaxing and Netflix, it was finally time to put the meme to use  
“huh I didn’t think that was an actual thing” Steve smiled watching Eli open up his pants  
“well, time to make it an actual thing” Eli reached in and pulled out Steve’s dick. Already hard and throbbing. Steve squirmed around until he pulled his pants all the way down. Eli grabbed the shaft and started to pump it, causing a nice moan from Steve. Eli lowered his head and swirled his tongue around the head.  
“Alright that’s it” Eli said as he got up, took the dishes and left to the kitchen to put them in the sink  
“WHAT?!”  
“I’m not in the mood for anything”  
“awww come on! don’t blue ball me babe!”  
“eh”  
“DON’T EH ME!”  
“Eh” Eli was giggling as he came back in the room  
“you never gave me chocolates”  
“is this what it’s about?!”  
“mmaaaayyybbbeeee”  
“fine! they’re in the bag”  
“and?”  
“and what?”  
“well, aren’t you going to give it to me”  
“you want me to get up and give you your chocolates?! The bag is right next to you!”  
“and?”  
“oh my god. Fine!”  
“way to make it romantic Steve” Steve grumbled as he fully kicked off his pants and walked over. His dick starting to hurt, complaining to it’s owner. Steve reached in and pulled out a nice heart box of chocolates  
“here. Happy?”  
“no. make it romantic”

 

“FINE!”  
“fine? Is that all I am to you”  
“oh my god. Why are you tormenting me?”  
“oh I’m sorry, I didn’t know my feelings tormented you so much”  
“okay okay!...ahem….here Eli, I bought these for you. I thought about you today when seeing all the hearts and flowers and junk. So, I knew I had to give you something special, just to show how much I love you” Eli took the chocolate box and tossed it aside a bit too casual like  
“what the hell!?”  
“what? I don’t want chocolate right now” Steve rubbed his face and slowly pulled them down  
“oh my god. Eli. What do you want?”  
“where’s my kiss?” Steve grabbed Eli and dug into his lips, bending him over slightly, just like the nurse and sailor picture. After a few lovely moments he pulled off.  
“there. Happy now?”  
“you really are truly the most romantic alpha there is”  
“i know”  
“i was being sarcastic”  
“i know” Steve did another deep kiss, except this time, he used more tongue. He explored Eli’s mouth and Eli returned the favor. Steve pulled off and looked at him warmly  
“okay, how was that?”  
“much better. Go sit on the couch”

 

Steve silently nodded and plopped himself down.  
“oh great yeah, just throw your weight into it, totally don’t break it or anything”  
“I’m sorry!” Eli just grinned and winked before leaving.  
“stay there. I’ll be right back”   
“alright….not like I’m going anywhere….” Steve sighed and leaned back into the couch. His cock wouldn’t stop throbbing.   
“and you! You stop that! I know I know. You have to wait! Stupid dick….I’m sorry…..you know I love you, I am as eager as you are” suddenly Steve had a towel thrown in his face.   
“alright, if you promise to listen to me later on today on our romantic day out, I’ll blow you” Eli said as he came back into the room and sat down next to Steve.  
“yeah okay I promise!”  
“every word?”  
“yes!”  
“and no complaining?”  
“i won’t complain!”  
“you REALLY promise?”  
“YES!”

“okay, you’d better remember!”  
“i will I promise!”  
“good” Eli suddenly grabbed Steve’s shaft and squeezed hard, almost a bit too hard  
“owowowow!”  
“you PROMISE PROMISE?!”  
“YES PLEASE STOP! I PROMISE PROMISE!” Eli let his grip go and gently stroke the shaft. The red marks slowly fading away  
“good”  
“what was that for?!”  
“to give you a reminder” Eli kissed Steve’s neck, stroking faster. Steve took a deep relaxed breath and he enjoyed the pleasure. He closed his eyes and focused on it. Suddenly he made a small gasp and it was suddenly being licked by Eli, who was now on his knees in front of Steve. He really was too small and quiet. Eli took the head into his mouth and sucked on it, slowly licking down the shaft all over. Steve’s eyes fluttered from pleasure. Eli slowly moved his head down, bobbing little by little. Steve moaned and rand his fingers through Eli’s hair. Eli stopped suddenly, took his glasses off and gently placed them on the table behind them. Then got right back to work! What? He couldn’t ruin his glasses!…..again…...he’s learned that the hard way…...certain kinds of stains are impossible to get out of glasses….

 

Eli took the entire shaft into his throat now, Steve’s breathing became unstable and ragged. Eli pulled all the way off and started to jerk the shaft, kissing the head and tasting the pre. Eli moved his head down and licked at Steve’s balls. He enjoyed the sounds of Steve’s moans of pleasure. Eli went back to sucking on the shaft, he started to squeeze the balls gentle. He pulled off and looked at Steve, before squeezing hard.   
“you’re doing what I say, understand?”  
“YESYESYESYESYES”  
“good. Remember this!”  
“I WILL PLEASE STOP!” with that, Eli let go of the grip and continued to give teh succ!  
Eli ran his tongue around the shaft as he sped up. Steves chest rose and fell faster and his breathing became harder. Steve’s moans became more intense until he started to cry out that he was about to finish. Hearing this, Eli only sped up faster. After a good amount of wet slick sucks, Steve finished. His legs shook and he moaned loudly. Eli swallowed and pumped quickly, making sure Steve got the full effect. Eli didn’t like to stop projects until they were fully finished! 

Steve groaned as he shot the last bits left. Eli squeezed the shaft hard and pumped a few more times until there was nothing left. He then sucked and licked the shaft clean before pulling it out  
“there. Better?” Steve could only groan and slightly nod his head.   
“you never do last long enough.” the only reply he got was another light groan.  
“Alright, I’m going to go brush my teeth, you clean yourself up and get ready for a fun day!

 

……………………………………….

Toby yawned and sighed, he was currently waiting at a park for Claire. He and her were going to have a friend date day! Why be alone and bored when you could spend time with one another? The girls were doing their own things, so that just left the two of them! Jim said via texts that he was still currently being held hostage by the overprotective troll husband. Well, at least he cares!. Toby just said RIP and hoped he wouldn’t die from being bored. Eli only sent one text, saying he and Steve were going to have a fun day out! Well, prob not for Steve. But he made a promise! A very, very, intense promise. Toby had no idea what that meant and was afraid to learn, so he didn’t go any further. 

“Well, there’s my hot date!” Toby looked up and smiled as Claire finally arrived  
“well, SOMEONE took forever….as usual”  
“hey shut up! THIS takes forever! Especially when a certain perverted changeling hogs the bathroom all day. Do you know how many time’s hes had mud baths in there?! Lighting scented candles, listening to relaxing music, cucumber on his eyes. The entire thing.”  
“huh, didn’t think he’d be into that”  
“exactly what I said!”  
“he’s a mystery at times” they both gave each other a hello hug  
“alright, Toby, from one 10 to another-”  
“I’m a 12 but go on”  
“-you read for a fun day of gagging at couples”  
“yes! First, brunch!”  
“the gayest meal of the day” and so the two headed off!

…………………………………………………

Arrrg was currently dragging a big sack through his home. Accidentally knocking over many things as he passed through.   
“oh goodie the tornado is here” Dic complained as he sipped tea and listened to some special valentine murder mystery on life time…..he really loved that channel  
“hello”  
“yes, hello. What have you got there? It isn’t more garbage is it?” Arrrg looked at the sack  
“uh….no?”  
“wonderful. Just make sure it isn’t in my walk ways. I really don’t wish to slip and break my poor weak form anymore than it already is”  
“healthy. Just complain a lot.”  
“well, that’s me” Arrrg opened the sack and pulled something out  
“for you”  
“oh wonderful!….mind actually handing it to me? can’t see it, remember”  
“….yes” Arrrg handed him a nice heart shaped box of chocolates!  
“ohh, what’s this for?”  
“human holiday. Valentino day”  
“huh, didn’t know they had a holiday for clothing. Well, humans are strange”  
“day for love not cloths!”

“well, I return the affection...i don’t have anything for you though. Unless you want the rest of this earl grey”  
“it’s tea, not troll named earl”  
“no it’s….that’s just the name of it”  
“thought it was called tea”  
“do you want the dri-” Arrrg bit it out of his hand  
“WATCH THE FINGERS!”  
“hm, good”  
“yes….thank you for the slobber”  
“you’re welcome….where Blinky?”  
“In the bedroom I believe….if you plan on doing anything, please keep the noise to a minimum. I don’t want to hear anymore of your ‘playtime’. Loud enough already. Plus this is a special. This human woman is being framed for murder. I think she know who’s committed the act however”  
“huh...uh...bye”   
“yes, goodbye” the sounds of various things falling down or breaking was heard as he left the room.  
“wonderful….”

The TV was turned up  
“But Janet, you SWORE in the court that you would tell EVERYONE EVERYTHING!”  
“I’m sorry...”  
“if you were, then why’d you cover the murder for Paul? Huh?”  
“he…..”  
“he what?”  
“he’s….a Florida man...” (if you get the joke you get an internet heart shaped cookie!)

“ohh, I wonder if Nana is watching this as I am”

Arrrg had walked into the room, looking with loving eyes at Blinky who was currently reading 3 different books.  
“happy Valentino day!”  
“A day for human garments? Interesting. Such strange customs”  
“day of love! Not cloths!”  
“do you mean valentines day?”  
“yes! Valentino day!”  
“yes. So, happy day to you too my dear sweet Arrrg” Arrrg came over and nuzzled him, then did a long lick across his face  
“do you mind?!”  
“no” he nuzzles him harder, almost making him fall to the floor  
“do you mind?!”  
“no. oh! Got gift!”  
“oh how delightful! Apologies I don’t have anything in return”  
“fine. Here!” Arrrg pulled out a large old fashioned box. Partially broken and rusted. Like something you’d find at your grandma’s house (he may or may not have dug through Toby’s trash)  
“oh how lovely”  
“knew you’d like it!” Blinky places it in a nice corner of the room, he’s roughly nuzzled again from Arrrg. 

 

“romance!”  
“hmm oh I know one idea!” Blinky went over to an old fashioned record player. After digging around in a pile, he started one up. Fly me to the moon started to fill the room with music  
“fun! Dance!” and so they did! A nice relaxing fun sway of bodies  
“this song will always bring memories of that one trip we took. Accidentally crashing and ending up in that one strange town deep in the forest. Overrun by gnomes! Someone truly needs to deal with that! Such strange occurrences too! Needing to fix our gyre, scavenging for parts. That strange human hut. What was it called? Well I cannot recall. Something about a mystery and oddities. Also seemed to worship some kind of rectangle. No wait square. Triangle? Circle? Humans worship strange things”  
“weird bear”  
“that was a strange mammal wasn’t it? We used to travel so often”  
“ohh blue lion”  
“ah yes that beautiful beach we visited, odd summer. I could have sworn something was happening right before we departed. I seem to recall it as a green lion”  
“ohhh pretty waterfall!”  
“ohh yes! That one jungle! Such a marvelous sight!”  
“big bird. Loud.”  
“hm, yes where ever that source of the noise was coming from truly was a...what do they say...’mood breaker?’”  
“dogs”  
“i told you, there were no dogs running around”  
“heard voices”  
“you were imagining things. The waterfall makes all kinds of noises”

 

“town. Bug man”  
“would you get over that!”  
“saw!”  
“you did not see any sort of flying bug man”  
“eyes.”  
“there is no such thing as glowing red eyes on a humanoid insect hybrid. You must have mistaken it for a stalkling”  
“town pretty”  
“it was wasn’t it?”

“ohh! Town! Big building”  
“are you referring to the one were you thought you saw a ‘strange dog open it’s face’?”  
“yes! Tall one too”  
“you and your imagination”  
“was real”  
“next your going to saw you’ve seen children on brooms”  
“….yes”  
“next time you see something strange, show me”  
“did!”  
“what? The house with chicken legs? I looked and all I saw was a small hut in a tree”  
“it moved!”  
“it was the wind, you adorable alpha” they nuzzled and continued to dance. When the song ended Arrrg looked into a pair of Blinky’s eyes

“sex?”  
“what?”  
“sex? Now?”  
“very well. I suppose we haven’t for a few hours” Arrrg watched Blinky take off his cloths before grabbing him and bending him over  
“would you at le-” Arrrg shoved his tongue into Blinky’s ass. Blinky gasped and squirmed a bit. Arrrg growled as he dug his tongue deeper into the smaller troll, wiggling it around and fucking him with it. Blinky let out mini moans Before Arrrg pulled out and stopped  
“why did you stop?!”  
“beg”  
“more please”  
“beg better!”  
“Stuff me! Please!”  
“hmmm….maybe. First” Arrrg dug a finger into him, pushing it deeper in and wiggling it around. Then pulling it out and does it over and over.  
“hehe, beg”  
“MORE! I DEMAND MORE!” Arrrg does it a few more times before pulled it out. He went back to tongue fucking Blinky. The smaller troll grabbed at the ground and took unsteady breaths. Arrrg pulled out and chuckled. He pulled Blink under him and rubbed his tip against his hole  
“more begging!”  
“stuff me! I need it! Please! I beg you to allow me to fulfill you sexually!”  
“okay” Arrrg slowly puts his tip in, he doesn’t just fuck him, he grabs Blinky’s body with one hand and pulls him into it. Thrusting and moving Blinky’s body into it, both started to pant and moan. Arrrg grips him tighter and fucks him harder. He fucks him roughly into the floor, almost smashing him into it. Arrrg slows down to take a few deep breaths. He sits up and drags Blinky with him. He grabs Blinky and starts bouncing him like a fleshlight. Arrrg puts an arm behind his head and relaxes and Blinky’s squirming in his grip and moaning loudly. Arrrg slowed him down before pulling out. He dropped Blinky onto the ground before he holds Blinky up against a counter and thrusts up into him. He doesn’t hold back, his body is starting to glow. His eyes change and he snarls in anger. He rucks harder and harder, not listening to Blinky’s moans to slow down. He backs up and pulls Blinky under him before fucking him into the floor once more. He snarls and speeds up. Blinky pants out for mercy, Arrrg ignored him. Blinky was trying to hold himself in one place with three hands, the fourth gripped and tugged himself, trying to match Arrrgs own speed. Arrrg made a few heavy loud roars before slamming his knot into the smaller troll. Blinky cried it and once again begged for him to slow down, or at least give him time to adjust.

Arrrg once more ignored the omegas pleads of mercy. Arrrg put his full force into his thrusts being snarling out as his orgasm hit. A few harder fucks before he started to slow down. Blinky had his own as he felt his body start to fill with the potent alpha’s seed. The thrusting slowed down and the room’s only noise was panting and moaning. Arrrg’s body went back to normal along with his eyes. He made a nice growl of satisfaction.  
“i-i-ask-ed f-for mercy!”  
“oops...sorry”  
“brute.”  
“hehe” Arrrg shuddered and shivered as he did a few last fucks. He took a nice deep breath before he heard his stomach growl. He started to turn around and walk, dragging Blinky along with him  
“hey, hey! Stop this at once!”  
“hungry~” Blinky tried to use two arms to hold onto anything he could to stop him, while the other two were trying to pull him off of Arrrg. Arrrg simply dragged Blinky through their home   
“WOULD YOU STOP THIS?! I TOLD YOU TIME AND TIME AGAIN TO NOT TREAT ME LIKE SOME PLEASURABLE DEVICE!”  
“take to long to calm down. Hungry now” Blinky groaned as he was dragged into the kitchen. Arrrg;s knot would be the death of him one day….

 

Dic had started to hear grunts, he simply turned up the TV to max volume.  
“great. Right at the good part.”

…………………………………………………………

Arrrg and Blinky spent the rest of the day relaxing and reminiscing about their various trips across the world through the ages…

Draal wouldn’t let Jim leave from their little hidey hole until the next day, meanwhile they had constant sex and Jim on his phone while Draal slept on him like a bear hibernating. Jim wondered if all trolls slept this deeply…

Eli dragged Steve all over from one ‘romantic’ thing to another. Steve especially hated that they watched three romantic comedies in a row. Eli reminded him of the promise he made….

Claire and Toby had their own day of fun, they went to an amusement park and rode rides, stuffed themselves with garbage food, and watched fireworks. All while making gross faces at couples…

 

Noten was arrested for vandalism, property damage, driving a stolen Ferrari, being a threat to the community, Arson, illegal gambling, prostitution, escaping from detainment, resisting arrest, possession of illegal drugs, and stealing a karaoke machine….

But that 

Is a story for another day

(actually it isn’t =p HAHAHA) 

 

HAPPY VALENTINO DAY!


	20. Monger madness finale!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eu finally gets what he's always wanted and well-ish, earned!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, how's it going? been forever huh? alright enough pleasantries. look. i could NOT think of ANY THING to use to end this. i have a lot of other ideas and fun stuff i want to use and i could NOT for the life of me figure out how to just get back to do it. so i said 'fuck it just wrap it up' so i did. so ultra short chapter to tie up the story. super shitty i know but who the fuck cares honestly XD so yes! now more random ass chapters can be done in the future! sorry for the ultra long wait. like i said, couldn't think of anything. so yeah, fuck it time to move on. so few tings first
> 
> cute idea in my head. read some AU stuff from a Jraal post on tumblr. pretty much like a bouncer-ish theme. then my mind imagined this whole thing of romantic flirty bodyguard. Draal being like a bouncer bodyguard style. big leather jacket, sunglasses that reflected, ear piece, the works. him always getting between others and Jim like "Hold up, you don't have permission" "for what?" "TO LIVE!" beats the shit out of them for getting too close
> 
> friend showed me venture brothers (never really seen it before) and she showed me this one scene where brock is naked and has a head in his hand Dr Venture looks at him "why are you naked? "to prey on their fear." and that is SO Draal and Jim
> 
> Draal and Jim trying to do cute things but fail. horribly. like, Jim will write hidden 'i love you' notes in stuff. like maybe jim gets draal some kind of weapon polisher with 'i love you' on it. Draal smiles and says "i love you too polisher" Jim's like "draal....i wrote that" "thank you for helping it share its feelings for me jim"
> 
> i just super love 'cat' Jim. just jim doing dumb cat stuff. like toby pointing a laser pointer and looking at jim "what? i am NOT chasing it!"  
> "then why are you looking at it so much?" "because you're moving it around!" "mmhhmm" "i am not-" he dives for it
> 
> Jim: Tobes, can you get my top?  
> Toby: Here you go, Jimbo. [hands over shirt]  
> Jim: I meant can you go get Draal.
> 
> gay porn acting (or just general porn acting) is the fucking best, besides the actual fucking. just, its so bad its amazing. "bruh i aint gay"  
> "yeah man but come on, suck dis dick" "well....okay...but....i just don't know.." meanwhile he's already grabbing the dudes dick and stoking it without even being told to do it like "whoa, this is totally weird and crazy that I'm even thinking about this" like really dude? really? "oh man, i think a storm is coming, we better get inside the house since we're outside in the backyard" like obviously dude ALSO ITS A CLEAR FUCKING SKY. YOU COULDN'T THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE TO SAY?! geez Draal would be a better actor than you absolute fav will always be lemon stealing whore. i. fucking. die. each time. if you haven't seen it. oh my fucking god look it up RIGHT NOW
> 
> it made me have the stupidest fucking idea that jim and draal try to make their own porno and its just a disaster. draal always looking at the camera awkwardly, always freezing up and needing to be reminded what his lines are. hes more focused on getting that right rather than the actual sex. Jim is trying to be sexy but just can't stop feeling weird when the cameras on him. draal also wanting to use props but partially eats them or something. or like 'i have your pizza delivery' but he gets mad cause he sees that there wasn't any pizza in the box, so hes storming around demanding the pizza stealing culprit comes out at once.
> 
>  
> 
> MBMBAM - Curse a Real Sword but with team trollhunter sitting around talking about this  
> Jim: "100$"  
> Blinky: "that wasn't even the question. THE QUESTION WAS DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW TO CURSE A REAL SWORD, NOT HOW MUCH WOULD IT COST JIM LAKE JR TO CURSE MY REAL SWORD!"  
> Arrrg: "wait what did you want to curse?"  
> Blinky: "I'm so mad-you didn't stick the dismount! you flipped in the air for 20 minutes! you didn't stick the landing! a real sword"  
> Jim: "200$"  
> Toby: "why did it increase?"  
> Jim: "wasting my time kid"  
> Blinky: "okay. alright. ARE YOU GONNA CURSE THIS FUCKING SWORD FOR ME OR NOT?!"
> 
> Toby: "i have some bad news for you  
> Arrrg: "what's that?"  
> Toby: "it's a starbucks, and you've been dead the whole time"  
> Claire: "uh what?"  
> Toby: "TWIST, SHAMALAN!"  
> Draal: "why do i have a sword?"  
> Toby: "do you? look in your right hand"  
> Claire: "holy shit this is not a real sword at all"  
> Jim: "that's one of our new sausage and gouda sandwiches, they're new this week"  
> Arrrg: "can you curse this for me?"  
> Jim: "yeah no problem"  
> Draal: "how much is that?"  
> Jim: "how much for what?  
> Arrrg: "cursing my sandwich"  
> Claire: "ah that comes free with the purchase"  
> Draal: "ah, ah fuck yeah"  
> Jim: "no problem"  
> Draal: "do it  
> Also where is wizard hut is just the oath episode. alright thats all for now! enjoy

Jim was weirdly nervous as he stood at the entrance of the monger home. He breathed in through his nose and stilled his nerves to the best of his ability. The cold stung it slightly, only to suddenly be warmed by the heat at his back. Earlier that morning, Jim had made a group chat telling Toby and Claire that they could come visit, they were surprised as much as Jim was when they were told Draal had already finished up their home. Well, there goes Jim’s excuse to keep them away. Currently Eu was training with Draal, all while Braz watched, which cause Eu to become FAR more nervous about failing horribly in front of him, he already was a weak monger, he REALLY didn’t need to show Braz just HOW weak.

Jim would fidget from time to time with his nose ring, something he’s made a habit of in such short time. A second habit he picked up was twisting his mate band on his arm around. It felt awkward to wear it at first, but now he’s starting to enjoy it, a reminder of Draal’s eternal love for him. Not unlike the actual carvings in his body that last forever. Claire and Toby would be shadow jumping to Jim any minute now, far faster and safer than a gyre! Jim had started to get used to his little monger kilt, and being shirtless, although the cold kept bothering his chest, and he tried to cover his nipples when he could. Crossing arms helped thankfully. As well as no one asking about it.

The portal opened up and his best friends stepped through. Toby being over dramatic about shivering, complaining that he was about to become a Toby Popsicle, Jim laughed and hugged him, along with Claire who, thankfully, wasn’t complaining. She was far too excited looking past Jim’s shoulder and out into the monger home.  
“this place is AMAZING! it’s like seeing trollmarket all over again! But with an R rating!”  
“and this time DON’T just run off. You will literally be killed.”  
“you got it”  
“goes the same for you Tobes”  
“hey, I’ll literally be glued to you if I have to! I really don’t feel like dying. Daaam this is the place?! This is totally...well Draal. Dam, you’re right, there is surprisingly good service up here”  
“don’t forget to switch to WiFi. I don’t even want to imagine how much a phone call might cost all the way out here”  
“you got it! Hey so-AH!” Toby jumped out of the way as 5 spears planted themselves suddenly right next to them. Jim didn’t even flinch.  
“oops! Hold on!” he waved his amulet in the air, a clear signal not to hurl weapons at them anymore.  
“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!” Toby yelled out suddenly physically clinging to Jim  
“well, mongers LITERALLY try to kill you when you come close. it’s actually how they say welcome. If you survive, then you’re worthy to come to them, if you die, well, you die. SO not many people up here”  
“YEAH NO SHIT THAT YOU DIE YOU DIE?! God I felt like my life flashed before my eyes….NOT ENOUGH BURRITOS TO TASTE!” Claire shivered and put away her shadow staff before she started to complain  
“can we PLEASE go inside!” Jim nodded and the three high tailed up to the entrance….

 

The sudden blast of heat from the entrance engulfed them, followed by the smells  
“is...that...blood I smell?”  
“don’t...focus on it….at all...or anything else for that matter” A large monger at the entrance waved them inside and shouted in troll  
“WELCOME! WELCOME! My bad! I thought you weren’t Jim’s allies!” Jim just gave an awkward smile in reply  
“what was your name again...Hag?”  
“nope! Har! it’s Har my trollhunter!” he suddenly charged at Jim who summoned his shield out of habit, the monger bonked his head against it and fell backwards. He sat up and shook his head  
“why’d you do that?”  
“YOU CHARGED AT ME!”  
“I WAS TRYING TO WELCOME YOU BACK HOME MY TROLLHUNTER!...i...see someone’s not very social today...”  
“no it’s just, I really don’t have a strong enough head and horns like you do”  
“ah. Then I shall remember from here on out NOT to charge you! But I do DEMAND a chest bump!”  
“okay that’s-” Har slammed himself into Jim, knocking the wind out of him and sent him back a few feet  
“o….k...a...y...may...be….a….fist...bump..”  
“a what?” Jim took a few deep breaths before getting up and going over  
“you GENTLY bump fists...like...this”  
“huh. Seems a bit weak. Fine, I will make an exception just for you my trollhunter. Please! Come inside! With-” Har turned his attention to Claire and Toby who stood side by side shivering and waving lightly. Har looked at Jim with an emotion Jim couldn’t place  
“why are….fleshbags….here?”  
“those are my friends, Claire and Toby”  
“hm.”  
“is that...a problem?” Har rubbed his horns and then his chin a bit, looking them over, clearly in deep thought.  
“my trollhunter, I would never demand anything from you, except this once. I do not know what our kin will do in reaction to fleshbags within our home that aren-nevermind that last part...but...you MUST see the old man. Within as few moments as you can. I can not aid or prevent anything. I simply can warn you”  
“are they gonna die?”  
“i….hm...go see the old man” Jim nodded and led them inside. The entire time Har watched them, unable to decide what he should think and feel.

Toby and Claire were breathless. From the massive skulls and bones, to the ENORMOUS amounts of weapons and armors and everything monger. Toby gasped  
“this..place...is...so..COOL! SO SCARY BUT COOL!”  
“wow! WHOA LOOK AT THE HEARTSTONE!”  
“that’s EVEN MORE BADASS!”  
“come on guys we need to see the old man”  
“who?”  
“you’ll see” Toby looked around then said the question on his mind  
“hey Jimbo, what were you saying back there?”  
“huh?” Claire took her eyes off of a massive sword, looking like it was crafted for a giant  
“he means that Har wasn’t speaking English. I understood though”  
“Awww no fair! I can’t understand! You both speak troll!”  
“you could always learn Toby! I could teach you”  
“yeah...but..”  
“too lazy.” Jim stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned to the both of them  
“Alright guys. Stay RIGHT NEXT TO ME AT ALL TIMES! Har said we need to RUSH to the old man, so we will. Just stay close and hurry, do NOT get distracted. Okay? Mongers aren’t friendly at first, what am I saying, you both know Draal and how he is, no need to tell you” The three nodded and made their way to the heartstone!

……………………………………………………………………………

The speed walking was a bit….tense. Putting it lightly. Trying to move through the crowd, Jim kindly telling the mongers he wasn’t really able to fight at the current time, as well as say his friends aren’t for killing or sacrifice or even eating. Jim truly hoped that last one was a joke when asked it. Finally, they made it inside! Without a scratch!  
“hail my trollhunter!” Lot the monger called out as he watched Jim approach, however his tone quickly changed to a mix of curiosity and annoyance.  
“what….are humans doing here?”  
“hi, uh what was your name again?”  
“Lot, Lot the large and in charge”  
“nice”  
“right?”  
“these are my two best friends. They mean the world to me”  
“ah. I see. Well. I shall not kill them, I swear that to you my trollhunter”  
“Thanks...uh so we needed to see Jurl”  
“ah here to see the old man aye? Head on inside! I believe he’s speaking to Eu right now”  
“oh? About what?”  
“dunno. Little alpha came in here nervous as ever”  
“hm...well thanks again” Lot the large and in charge nodded and let them pass. Toby and Claire felt the red walls and looked around, admiring it all. The three of them heard Jurls deep voice speaking softly to Eu. Eu looked as nervous as ever, shaking in his own kilt and eyes large and sad  
“-eally? Nothing else?”  
“no my child”  
“oh….nothing nothing?”  
“i won’t repeat myself. There is no possible way in any form. If there were, then I would have spoken to you about it” Eu let out a shaky sigh and rubbed his arm as he looked to the ground  
“oh….okay….thanks...again...”  
“worry not, you are training with the trollhunter and his mate. You shall become a true warrior”  
“yeah….that’s true”

 

Eu looked up and became wide eyed as he noticed Jim and his friends  
“Jim!” Jurl turned around, his body making the floor thump. He smiled and welcomed them inside fondly  
“hello! Welcome back my trollhunter! How may-oh who are these humans?” Toby quietly said as he took in a slow breath  
“holy crap that’s a big troll”  
“uh, Jurl these are my best friends. Claire, and Toby”  
“hello little humans”  
“Jimbo what’s he saying?”  
“he’s saying hello”  
“he doesn’t speak trollish, I should not be surprised. Bring them forth!” Jim nodded and told Claire and Toby to walk forward. Claire first, being brave and bowing, before Jurl dug his nose into her and gave her a long lick, smearing her makeup. Toby started to laugh, only to suddenly stop as the same had happened to him  
“who’s laughing now Toby?”  
“hm….fascinating. So, my trollhunter, why have you brought them here? Simply to meet me?”  
“sorta, I also wanted you to meet them so that they, you know, don’t die. I don’t want them to be killed when I bring them to my cave, have them visit from time to time”  
“ah. Permission granted. I will let it be known that your little humans are not to be harmed, or else feel your wrath tenfold”  
“yeah….sure….thanks, I think”  
“you are welcome”  
“hi Eu”  
“hi….Jim”  
“what’s wrong buddy?” Jim walked over to Eu who suddenly hugged Jim and moaned into his chest  
“i….i…..i can’t do it!”  
“do what?”  
“i can’t find a way to mate Braz! I’ve looked and searched google and Bing and searched more and more and tried to read everything! Nothing comes up!”  
“hey, we’ll find a way-”  
“there is no way! I can’t have a courting event! I’ll die! And I won’t have anything if I die! Braz will be courted by someone else if I don’t officially court him soon! there’s a trial period! I didn’t know that! What am I gonna do...” Eu started to sniffle. Jim patted his head like he does with Draal when he’s upset.  
“hey, it’s gonna be okay”  
“how do you know!?”  
“I’m your trollhunter. Maybe we can find something together?”  
“there’s no hope. I might as well try to fight Toh and die!”  
“no need for that….uh...Jurl, can I do anything to help in any way?”

Jurl’s eyes squinted and he scratched his chest.  
“i think there is only a single way. It won’t be simple or easy”  
“but Eu won’t have to fight?”  
“not in the way of a regular courting event” Eu’s head shot up  
“r-really?! I won’t have my ass handed to me!?”  
“perhaps not. I believe there may be a small loophole we can exploit”  
“then let’s do it! let’s glitch this bitch!”  
“what?”  
“videogame-nevermind so what do we have to do?! I’ll do anything not to fight!”  
“well…...first the trollhunter must kill you”  
“……………………………………………………………………………………………...what?”

 

……………………………………………………………………….

Eu took a deep breath and tried to hold his sword up. He peaked out of a single eye while the other was tightly shut. He shook heavily. Jim was about to fight and kill Eu.  
“you ready to die Eu?”  
“s-sure” Jim charged at roared. Eu yelped and rolled out of the way, running and rolling away as fast as he could crying out. Draal was eating food, laughing heavily and wildly, slamming his hand to the bench. Truly enjoying the show. Toby and Claire sat next to him feeling awkward and cheering the two on, not really sure who to root for. Jurl was sitting nearby paying close attention. So far, it’s going exactly as he had predicted. He wasn’t sure if he should feel disappointment or not. This was Eu after all. Fighting isn’t exactly going to be his greatest skill. However, he is training with Draal as well as the trollhunter, so he should have picked up on SOMETHING. Well, at least he knows not to cower and stand still. That’s a true improvement right there.

 

 

Within the laws of the Monger tribe, mating events and courtship was powerful and important. Strict rules were applied to it. However, Jurl had thought of a way around it, in a sense. The trollhunter has the greatest say, well second to the tribes leader. The trollhunter decreed that Eu and Braz have permission to court, Jurl agreed along with it, thus it had officially begun.

 

Within this fight, Eu would only have honor by dying by the trollhunters hand. Within the monger tribes laws, honor would earn you titles. The greater your feats, the greater your honor, the more of a privilege life you get to live. Truly earning your keep. Dying by the trollhunters hand gave far more honor than most other things. If Eu died, he would have technically earned enough to have proved himself worthy of courting. Being given the blessing has technically began his event. All this, would never tie into each other typically, HOWEVER due to Jim being unique himself, the trollhunter being unique, they could change the even for Eu, if only a little bit, thus, by the end of this, he would have technically proven himself worthy of courting. He would technically have finished it and won by default since the trollhunter himself isn’t able to hold the title as he is already mated. With Eu being the one and only fighter, he would be declared the victor at the end of this.

 

Now the hardest part, Eu’s death. Death simply means the end of life. The complete stop of somethings existence. Eu’s life will die, and he would be born anew. In his new life, he would be mated, he would be following in the footsteps of the trollhunter and his mate, he would be training and becoming great in his own way. Killing off his previous life, and being reborn. His death will be technically legal and offical. Now all Eu had to do was prove himself in the ring for at least longer than a minute, proving that he has in fact learned to be a technical warrior.

Eu managed to lift up a sword and hit it against daylight, he opened an eye and noticed he had prevented his own physical death. He smiled and then just as quickly as it began, his confidence left him as Jim swung his sword again.  
“come on Eu, you have to be better than this”  
“i-i know!”  
“remember what I taught you”  
“I’m trying!”  
“remember what Draal taught you”  
“sex positions isn’t going to help me right now!”  
“DRAAL!”  
“what? And call me mate remember! Besides, he needed to be taught those lessons!”

Eu took this distraction and swung his sword, hitting Jim and knocking him backward. Jim could have easily avoided it, as well as the power within that swing would never had even moved his footing, but he was holding back his punches. Trying to do the bare bare bare minimum so that Eu would prove himself with his maximum ability…..which really wasn’t much..

“ow. Oh no, please don’t do the finishing blow”  
“o-oh...what? OH YEAH!” Eu charged, tricked and fell, got back up and charged again. Jim rolled and knocked Eu down with the butt of his sword, he walked over to the groaning ew and pointed the blade to his throat  
“goodbye Eu”  
“w-wait!”  
“nope” Jim buried his sword into the ground next to Eu, chopping off a tiny piece of his horn in the process  
“oh no. Eu has officially been killed. See? A small piece of what he once was. He is reborn and become a true monger warrior!” Jim called out picking up the piece and showing it. Jurl smiled  
“the challenger has been killed. Eu is officially killed. Eu is the victor. Who here is against his true victory?” no one around them said anything  
“and who here is for it?” Draal, Claire, and Toby clapped and cheered  
“then it’s decided. Eu, you have officially had your courting event. Now to simply state it to all and ask Braz if he will become your mate” Eu smiled and was helped up by Jim  
“hold out your hands” Eu did as instructed and watched the small piece of his horn drop into his hands  
“congrats, you did it”  
“AHHHHH I DID IT!” he cheered as happy as can be. Jim laughed and clapped as he made his way to Draal.  
“so, what do you think?”  
“hm. Weak. Sad. Pathetic. But this is all so strange, I guess I can’t complain.” they smiled and watched Eu run around happily….

 

…………………………………………………………………..

“so yeah. That’s about it” Jim and Jurl had gathered all the mongers up to announce what had transpired. Also that Jim’s friends weren’t to be killed. The mongers all booed and yelled. Jurl settled them all down.  
“enough! Trust my Judgment as well as our trollhunters. This is all legal and official”  
“yeah so….alright that and come on….okay seriously, it’s Eu. Just….let him have this. We all know him. He did the thing, everything’s official, he’s training, let’s just let him have this...no offense Eu”  
“oh no none taken if everything’s cool” the mongers all mumbled to one another, the consensus was pretty much  
‘it is true. He is Eu. He has both the trollhunters and the old mans blessing’

So everyone had accepted it and agreed. Eu couldn’t stop smiling he was so happy. He was giddy and couldn’t sit still. He found Braz and proposed to him monger style. He accepted it and they bumped horns. Plenty of mongers went ‘aww’ at their young love. Draal nuzzled Jim, it really wasn’t long ago when they had their own. Jim and Draal looked into each others eyes lovingly, then had a kiss. Eu and Braz came over to them  
“thank you soo much for everything Jim! uh...hey...is….well, Braz and I wana explore the world….but…I would have to stop training with you...”  
“no”  
“oh….okay”  
“no, I mean we will still train! I meant no as in no we don’t have to stop, just a little break. Go on, explore the world! Have fun!”  
“yay! Oh thank you so so so much for everything! I promise to talk to you all the time!”  
“don’t worry, you’re my favorite minor character, you’re not getting written out of this story for good”  
“yay! Thanks!”

 

And so they had a party and had fun then Claire Draal Toby and Jim hung out and then went back to Arcadia. Draal and Jim had lots of sex

 

THE END (for this whole monger madness XD)


	21. Dumb Drabbles for fun fellas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> just a bunch of random mini stuff, for fun! and feels!
> 
>  
> 
> i am planning full chapters here and there. But for the meantime I just had a bunch of dumb ideas i couldn't fit together, so why not just put them out there while you, the readers, wait! well enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dumb/cute idea. draal having hanahaki. one day he clears his throat and petals come out. he thinks nothing of it, must be something he ate. then more, then eventually hes hacking up whole flowers everytime he sees jim. he hides it and asks around privately to find out what it is. when he learns what it is he REALLY doesn't want anyone else to find out. they can't know it. if they do, they would wonder who he's in love with  
> the song black briar let me  
> did....did they know what they were getting themselves into? the lyrics?! this is straight up just singing about vore  
> so i want to start writing cute fun family chapters, jraal and son and family stuff, but i don't want to mess the timeline up? well anyways i don't want to just go back and forth from the 'future' with lil bab, to back in the present before bab. well, i guess I'll write a bit and see what will happen! whatever, no stress, just fun. like one cute idea is lil bab playing hide and seek but is getting sad he cant find anyone, so big daddy Draal pokes his horns out from a hiding place so lil bab can see and smile since hes found his daddy! another cute idea is lil son asks where babies come from. draal wants to say explicit sex, jim tells him trolls come from eggs. now lil son looks at every egg and wonders if a little baby troll is inside. when jim tries to cook with eggs lil son hides them and says babies are going to come out of them! they can't eat them! another is lil son loves to bother vendel and sneaks around, takes his staff, do little pranks, etc a true menace to society!  
> saw a post and thought about draal and jim  
> "i want someone who can light a fire in me"  
> "i want someone who can light me on fire"  
> stupid joke.   
> "we have to send morgana back to the shadow realm!" Toby pulling out his yugioh deck  
> "I'm on it"  
> i had this question for the longest time. WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYONE SLEEP!? i mean, they're always running around at night and school and training during the day along with regular activities, when the hell do they sleep?! i mean yeah sure some moments where they are seen sleeping BUT STILL, THEY SEEM TO GO FOR DAYS WITHOUT SLEEPING!  
> one neat idea i had is that merlin never turned jim into a half troll. instead, it's the amulet! it's sorta like radiation, it slowly mutates and turns him little by little. eventually he will become a full troll  
> Been playing a lot of Armello again. if you don't know what it is, it's a table top game. pretty much game of thrones but with furry's  
> it's fun! look it up!  
> alright thats all for now!

Jim was hunched over his desk yawning heavily. He licked his lips and focused back on his college work. Once more he chewed on a pencil trying to focus and think, his brain nothing but mush now. He rubbed his eyes as a car light went by his window. He nodded on and off, not even noticing Draal behind him  
“mate. You spend too much time on silly paper work”  
“its...for...college...”  
“i don’t see why it’s so important, you need to be well rested and energized, not drained over….numbers”  
“due two days from now. Need to. Do it.”  
“why do you even attend this school and waste your time and effort if it stresses you out and makes you tired?"  
"good to be educated, and help my future out"  
"your future is being the trollhunter. You will not get any other position. Look at me, i never did any kind of educational program and look how well i turned out" Jim let out a few tired laughs before closing his eyes and nodding off again. He didn’t even notice Draal turning off the light and picking Jim up and laid him onto his chest, wrapping an arm around him in their nest. Jim yawned and cuddled deeper into Draal’s chest. Draal in reply gently and softly rubbed Jim’s back, coaxing him into deeper sleep…

 

Barbara pulled her car up to her home, noticing Jim’s light still on and noticing how tired he was. She went inside and walked upstairs.   
“Jim sweetie you need to sleep” she said softly opening her son’s bedroom door. She smiled as she saw the peaceful scene of Jim and Draal sleeping softly, Jim’s head tucked under Draal’s so lovingly. Barbara smiled and closed the door quietly. Draal opened an eye and watched the door close. He closed his eye right after and felt more at ease knowing Barbara was home and safe as well.

 

………………………………………………………………………….

It was the afternoon of the next day. Jim was walking through the door sipping a smoothie along with Claire and Toby.  
“all I’m saying is that if you got a big enough scratching post, Jim would totally use it”  
“i am not using a scratching post!”  
“just saying, might make your nails feel better”  
“yeah, they do hurt at ti-HOLY FUCK MOTHER”  
“ah hello my mate” Toby and Claire noticed what Jim was freaking out about. In the living room Draal was standing there with an anaconda wrapped around his arm and a larger horn, hissing around and sniffing the air with it’s flicking tongue  
“DRAAL WHAT’S GOING ON?!”  
“call me mate.”  
“MATE WHAT’S GOING ON?!”  
“ah, well, I was thinking of getting a domesticated creature for you to own and provide for, in exchange for it’s loyalty and entertainment”  
“that’s….called a pet….but…..yeah I guess….”  
“so I ventured out this morning searching for one worthy enough for you! I could not find a dangerous enough animal. I couldn’t find a great white shark, a cone snail, or a stonefish. I didn’t think a black widow would be big enough, which is why I also skipped most insects and smaller creatures of that size. I searched for a black mamba as well, but couldn’t locate it. I thought of perhaps a boomslang, but it wouldn’t come to me when I called out to it. I thought a komodo dragon might be nice, but I was highly disappointed when I found out they were simply large lizards. A blue ringed octopus was far too small as well. A saltwater crocodile was a good choice! But it wouldn’t sit still long enough for me to take it. A hippopotamus was a good size! But it just ignored me and swam away. I went to fetch an alligator in Florida, but no collar would fit them, they also wouldn’t stop trying to go back into the swimming pools people own in their backyards. I was about to give up all hope when I ran into this adorable creature! It attached itself onto me almost instantly! I knew it would be loyal! It does tend to squeeze, so I took it to an animal hospital. They explained to me all about it. Oh it’s a boy by the way. He’s fairly harmless, here, hold him!”

“ohhhh noooo nonononono”  
“why not?” The anaconda started to hiss and move towards Jim as Draal got closer  
“okay I was JUST over at Toby’s house. I smell like a cat! it’s going to try and eat me!”  
“it’s only tried to swallow my hand three separate times. Hes harmless”  
“IT’S TRYING TO SWALLOW ME!”  
“no, he just wants you to pet him from the inside! he’s quiet adorable”  
“Jim, Draal, we’re home” Barbara called out from the backyard entrance  
“ah hello Ba bru ah. I have brought him a new addition to our family”  
“oh, you did? What kind of weapon is it this time? Something fun and flashy?” she said kindly, only to come into the room and scream. Walt sighed as he walked through the home right after Barbara, knowing Draal did his usual. Being himself.  
“what did he bring home this time? Oh, well THAT certainly was unexpected”  
“DRAAL GET THAT OUT OF HERE!”  
“aw, I wanted to keep him, name him slithers. He really has affection for my mate”  
“IT’S TRYING TO EAT HIS HAND”  
“he just wants to be pet from the inside”

 

Well. It didn’t take much after that for Draal to be...convinced….to return the beast from whence it came! At least Jim wasn’t eaten, or anyone or anything else as well…

 

…………………………………………………………………………….

 

Jim was sitting down in Blinky’s library being groomed and read to. With one hand Blinky was brushing Jim’s fur, another hand was holding a book, and the other two were moving various things around in organization, Arrrg helping him out nearby  
“now then I think that should be enough knowledge to tide you over for the time being. I don’t want you to learn too much at once and grow confused and distracted”  
“thanks Blinky, me confused and distracted? Since when?”  
“oh a numerous number of times. Now, before you go, I have been reading some human psychology books. One of them describes the need to release stress and trauma. So, I’ve procured a punching bag. I couldn’t find a soft nerf bat, but I found a baseball bat with nails driven into it in an ally way this morning, a fair substitute”  
“BLINKY NO!”  
“what’s the matter? Should I have found something else? It did have some red stains on it but I cleaned it right off”  
“THAT’S A MURDER WEAPON!”  
“are you sure? It didn’t appear to be one to me”  
“YEAH I’M PRETTY SURE! GO THROW IT AWAY!”  
“seems like a waste of a perfectly good stress reliever item, but as you wish master Jim” Blinky finished grooming Jim, gave him a pat on the head and moved to go put some books away  
“alright I’m leaving, I need to do a quick round patrol around with Draal. Hope things don’t get too wild”  
“it is mating season for certain species, be careful!”  
“great. More things to worry about. Alright I’m leaving, bye Arrrg, bye Blinky” The two of them spoke at the same time  
“goodbye master Jim”   
“oh before I leave, I saw Dic just sitting still staring off into space without moving or talking. Is he alright?”  
“ah yes he’s fine. He’s been dissociating for roughly an hour, give or take, I thought he might have died so I checked on him. He then yelled at me saying I was bothering him. So in short, he’s fine”  
“good to know, alight see you guys later” as Jim left Arrrg turned to Blinky and smiled  
“brush me now”  
………………………………………………..…………..

Draal and Jim walked around trollmarket, breaking up little spats, finding lost objects, and even signing a few things. The two had a fairly relaxing time, well as relaxing as being the trollhunter gets to be. Then they needed to interrogate someone for a potential crime. Jim and Draal always made the best good cop bad cop combo.  
“look. I wana be your friend, so I’m giving you a choice. You can either deal with me-” Jim snapped his fingers signaling Draal to slam his fists onto the ground and roar  
“-or you can deal with him. Which one?”  
“y-y-you! Not the monger!”  
“good. That’s what I was hoping”

 

The day was nice and it was somewhat romantic. In the fun flirty style. Some one on one training had them laughing and riled up, having their own little mini competition to see who the victor was. It almost always ended in a tie, mostly just because they stopped in the middle to kiss and get frisky~

The evening was calming buutt…..

 

Barbara walked into the kitchen seeing a sad frowning Draal slowly eat out of a bowl. Then eat said bowl without even paying attention. In all honestly, him doing it on purpose or eating it by accident was a 50/50 chance.  
“Draal sweetie what’s wrong?”  
“ah...uh..erm...hello Ba bru ah….i uh...nothing, everything’s fine”  
“come on, don’t lie to your mother in law” Draal gave a big sigh and slumped his head onto the counter. Barbara came over and rubbed his arm  
“I failed and upset Jim...”  
“oh? How so?”  
“i…..forgot his favorite color”  
“uh….alright”  
“and then I forgot to help him move something”  
“okay”  
“then...i ate his basket of cloths….i was going to take them to the washer but…..i couldn’t help myself...”  
“so he got mad at you for those three things?”  
“yes. He told me he never wanted to be my mate ever again. I’m to be shunned and shammed”  
“I think a certain monger is exaggerating. That doesn’t sound like Jim at all”  
“he meant it though in context”  
“what exactly did he say?”  
“’mate, please don’t eat my cloths, I just bought them’ then I said that I would get more for him in apology. I said I would make sure to get them in his favorite color. But….i forgot it….”  
“what do you mean? His favorite color is blue”  
“yes but….i said baby blue instead of navy blue...”  
“those...are still blue though, he really wouldn’t care”  
“then I apologized about forgetting to help him move something in trollmarket to aid Vendel. He said it was alright, but his eyes said he regrets our courtship”  
“come on now, don’t be so ridiculous. Jim loves you so much, he would never regret courting you”  
“i should just leave while I can”  
“don’t. Everything’s fine. Do you want to watch a movie with me? Make it feel better?”  
“I doubt I’m worthy of your time and effort”  
“alright then, Draal, if you DO want to be worthy of my time and effort, then you WILL join me in watching a movie or two”  
“hm…..your logic has swayed me. Alright”

 

She patted his arm kindly and the two had a mini movie marathon! Later that night Barbara and Walt were talking in their own bedroom  
“and well yeah that’s how he was when I found him. Are all mongers like that? Or is it just Draal?”  
“a bit of both. Mongers take courtship seriously, well all trolls do, but mongers are extreme in their own ways”  
“mongers going to the extremes seems easy enough to understand”  
“Draal is also very concerned with his affections for Jim and Jim’s for him, so Draal is a bit more extreme than other mongers”  
“our Draal taking things above and beyond, sounds like him. I love our big blue troll”  
“i strongly love that he tries to chase off the mailman like a dog”  
“that was one tim-thre-five times, and this time it only happened again because we have a new mailman and he saw him for the first time”  
“although I do give him credit for not charging out at the poor man with his axe”  
“yep, he decided to go nice and simple, instead, charging at him with a morning star” The two laughed together and settled in to sleep for the night

 

……………………………………………………………………………..

The next morning Draal was walking down the stairs, hearing a conversation and then looking only to see

‘uh oh…..’

He saw Nomura and Jim smiling and talking while eating breakfast and sipping tea  
“oh hey mate, good morning”   
“yes….good morning my...mate...hello Nomura….i did not expect you to be here”  
“you still say that every single time I come over, good morning to you too”

 

‘current mate with old flame….uh oh’

“we were just talking about you

‘UH OH!’

 

“Nomura was just telling me about the things you two used to do together, besides the...sex stuff I mean”  
“yes...she would always submit”  
“what? I think you’re mistaken, YOU were the one to submit”  
“i do not recall that what so ever”  
“HA! You’re just mad because I was always the one to take charge and put you in your place”  
“You could never best me”  
“AHEM! Hey, maybe we can change the subject, please? So my mate, why don’t you come join us?”  
“uh….okay….sure” So, Draal joined them, but felt very awkward the entire time. He didn’t know what exactly his ex flame spoke to his current mate about….hopefully not terrible things THAT WOULD CONVINCE JIM TO LEAVE HIM!

 

……………………………………………………………………………

It was later that day, Barbara, Jim, and Draal went out shopping! Draal was always very helpful. He would always sniff at various things to see which ones were fresh and which ones were close to expiring. Barbara would hold things up for him or ask him to fetch things.  
“no sweetie, the blue tub”  
“this is a blue tub”  
“no, there are more” Draal sighs and goes to to get another one. He brings it back  
“no a different one”  
“WHY ARE THERE SO MANY DIFFERENT VERSIONS OF THE SAME THING!? Why do fleshbags always have to over complicate things!”  
“that’s a good question. Here let me come with you, I can show you which blue tub”

Meanwhile Jim was going around professionally filling up his cart with every possible thing he could cook with already planning out entire meals for the future. Well, his husband wasn’t exactly a small eater, could you blame him?

………………………………………………………………………………………..

TEXT CONVO PARTYYYY!!!

D=Draal E=Eli St=Steve J=Jim C=Claire T=Toby (although honestly if I just said their first initial I’m pretty dam sure you’d know who tf I’m talking about XD)

 

J: hiii everyone!  
E: hiii Jim!  
C: hi  
T: I can see you through my window. What the hell are you doing?  
J: gee hi Tobes. Mind your own beez waxxx  
T: what the hell is DRAAL DOING?!  
J: where he at?  
T: outside next to garage  
J: nooo idea  
E: anyways so guess whoooo just got a sweet new phone!  
T: you?  
E: no actually it’s Steve  
J: are you being sarcastic?  
E: nope! I’m soooo legit!  
C: stop being sarcastic  
E: I’m not! Here. Adding Steve  
ST: whats up fuckers?!  
C: yooo what’s up fuckers! Where ma big dick’s at!?  
J: noten get off Claire’s phone  
C: wut? Me mate? Nah I’m Claire!  
T: you even TYPE with an accent?  
C: oi me spickle crockets! Went doin to the pub when me old mates warty and heckle sent me their own cheerys! I said to send those blimy grimey bloaks back to bottlesmen!  
J: go back to swearing you’re worse than Walt. Uh god. Him.  
C: wut wrong?  
J: so, today I broke something by accident and I said ‘mother fucker.’ and he has the nerve to come around the corner and say ‘you called’?  
C: OIIII SHIIIZZZ! ME GUMBO!  
E: I can’t tell if you’re being genuine or just fucking with us cause no one here knows what the hell you’re saying. Also rip Jim. Wut you break?  
ST: it wasn’t my gift right?  
J: no not that don’t worry

 

E: why did you get HIM a gift?! Suddenly in love with him!?  
ST: what no  
E: YOU NEVER EVEN LOOK AT ME ANYMORE DURING THE KINODDLING HOUR!!  
T: Steve! For shame!  
J: not cool Steve  
C: how can you fuckem then leavin the tick back dry as a bone?  
E: I hate you with every fiber of my being right now  
J: who noten or Steve?  
C: I told you I’m Claire!  
E: guess.  
ST: is it me?  
E: guess again  
ST: is it Noten?  
E: guess again  
J: oh oh does it start with T and end with a O?  
T: is there a vowel in it?  
J: we have to pay more for one of those right?  
C: can I give a guess or do I have to spin?  
J: usually have to spin first   
ST: I’m gonna miss this when we’re all old and boring AF.  
D: hello  
J: =D  
D: hello my mate  
T: nooo leave!  
C: aye! Let them love birds have some peckin space to pick up those rice grains on the rainy day! Headin off to the nest flyin the backways to avoid them ally pussycatss! Spit you down like no other and givin you the hard 1 2 3 glare  
E: how do we ban someone?  
D: I wish to vore you my mate  
E: ok wut?  
T: O.O  
ST: hm…  
C: ohh nasty bobbies, oh you are a sick puppy. You drink half the town, and now this?! And you talk of beasts and now this? The real killerz are the spit ballwers  
E: Jim kill him for me  
J: oooookay hold on back up, you...want to...vore me?  
D: yes, it would taste good wouldn’t it?

 

T: hahahah heyy sooo I’m gonna close my curtains  
ST: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm want to say something butttt  
E: Steve be a good boyfriend and help me kill noten  
C: you hunters are the real killers of the town! Oh abandin me like some tuesday old rubbish on the cold cobblestone road. Play me filthy like the mongrel chewin the fat in the backyard with the chirpin birds  
D: he has a point  
E: YOU CAN UNDERSTAND HIM?!  
D: can’t you?  
C: blimey! I’ve been outed like a veggie in a field of cranberries!  
D: well it’s true  
J: oookay hold on shift it back. You want to vore me because it would be tasty?  
E: to be fair, Draal’s mouth IS big enough to fit your head into  
D: what does that have to do with anything?  
J: mate...lover….babe….husband...person I love….do….you KNOW what vore is?  
D: when you consume something you enjoy, typically with a loved one  
T: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA  
C: I’ve had me a stroke swizzle like a curtain down pourin under the bridge!  
ST: can I tellz him? Pwease?  
E: oh no, he’s turning into a furry yet again!  
ST: excuse me?  
J: Draaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal that isn’t what that…..just never say it again  
D: call me mate. Why? What does it mean?  
C: look it up me dude, me bloak, me second ham slam sand which queen style  
J: NO. DON’T YOU DARE  
C: rancid beasts every last one of us  
D: ah. I see. Is it as enjoyable as is shown?  
E: rofli  
ST: wha?  
E: rolling on the floor loving it  
D: mate, do you think we should investigate into this further together? My curiosity is piqued  
J: mate, drop it and move on  
D: I cracked my phone  
J: what why!?  
D: you told me to drop it and move on  
J: I DIDN’T MEAN DROP YOUR PHONE I MEANT THE SUBJECT  
C: have you got a screw loose? Or is it your….animal intuition  
C: wow. The little gremlin stole my phone. I come to this. Some days I wish we were all normal  
D: hello Claire  
C: hello Draal  
D: my mouth is big enough isn’t it? If I stretch it wide enough I could fit you head  
J: alright, mate. Come up to my room. Ignore whatever you saw. And let’s spend some quality time together. Relaxing time”  
D: alright, I won’t say no to that  
J: and please don’t scrape your spikes against the wall again, I know it’s not your fault, just look out for it alright?  
D: alright, I will not fail you again

 

T: weelllppp they’re gone! Aww, so cute, cuddling together  
T: annnnd there goes the dick alright nvm  
J: I can do magic too Tobes. Wana watch me make a troll dick disappear?  
T: ew stop being gross!  
J: ta da ;p  
T: omg Jim I swear one of these days your grossness is gonna get you in trouble with the sin police!  
J: gtg Draal’s getting mad I’m on my phone instead of riding  
C: atta boy. Ride your bull like there’s no tomorrow!  
T: noten get off her phone!  
C: but I am Claire!

………………………………………………………………

 

T: hello? Anyone awake?  
T: alright, if you’re reading this. Jim, LEARN TO CLOSE YOUR GOD DAM CURTAINS! I’M TIRED OF LOOKING OUTSIDE AND THE FIRST THING I SEE ACROSS THE STREET IS YOU CRAMMING A GIANT TROLL DICK INTO YOU! Eli you still up for movie night? Claire will you send me a copy of our math work? I can’t find mine  
ST: why no mention for meee?  
T: sorry, uh Steve...uh...don’t be a bad lover  
ST: on it!

……………………………………………………………………………..

that night Jim laid his head in his mothers lap as the two watched a movie post dinner. Jim loving the affection and purring. Barbara made a small giggle  
“well, I’ve always wanted a cat, guess my son can be mine”  
“meow”  
Draal yawned and scratched his chest before getting up and making his way upstairs  
“I’m going to retire for the evening, goodnight Ba bru ah”  
“bed already Draal? Hardly 8pm  
“i spent my energy when my mate and i-….were….relaxing earlier…..together….”  
“thank you for being discreet Draal”  
“I shall see you tomorrow, I shall see you soon my mate”  
“yeah, getting a little sleepy, won’t stay for much longer” The two turned back to the movie as it was in it’s final moments. After about a half hour or so Jim turned in for the night, he said his goodnight to his mother and left. A few minutes later Walt opened the door and took off his coat. Barbara was using a lint remover on her cloths and the couch. She sighed and looked at Walt  
“look at this! So much troll fur everywhere. I swear Jim really is a cat in disguise.”  
“that would explain his behavior and his love of salmon. It must be his shedding season”  
“great, more troll fur balls and clogged shower drains”  
“a seasonal delight to always look forward too”

 

…………………………………………………………………….

THE NEXT MORNING!!!

T: I can’t believe I’m up at this time but, anyone else up?”  
ST: sshhhh you’ll wake Eli!  
T: how can I possibly be noisy on a text  
ST: by typing too loudly!  
T: Steve go back to sleep.  
ST: mmmmhhhmmm  
J: =D guess who had morning sex!  
C: meeee!!!  
T: noten go put Claires phone back  
C: she’s-i mean, I’m not Noten, he’s busy doin somethin else  
J: anyways, soo guess who’s been...knotty…  
T: Jim. I will terminate our friendship. I’ve heard that joke for. so. Long. Now  
C: never gets old  
T: YES IT DOES!  
C: also, good for you bestie, proud of you!  
J: =D  
C: always nice to know bulls are bein riden at all hours  
T: am I the only one not perverted?  
C: Shan and Darci, we all know Mary is just as nasty as the rest of us tho  
J: haha….Shan and Darci….suuure  
T: SEE!   
C: so bestie, whatcha up to?  
J: relaxing half asleep in bliss with Draal. Listening to soft music and just enjoying our afterglows~

 

C: perfect slice of heaven right there  
T: yeah so anyways I was wondering if anyone wanted to meet up later and hangout some place. The mall has some new edgy shop. I want to go there and remember my middle school years  
J: LMFAO that’s right, that was riiiight after the ninja phase  
E: someone say anime garbage?  
T: u wit Steve?  
E: yee! he’s asleep tho  
J: ohhh yeah do you still have that body pillow of that anime girl?  
E: whhaaaaattt you had one?! Or haaavvee one currently?  
T: I have no idea what anyone of you garbage people are talking about  
C: fuckin blimey! I can sooo score more than just a body pillow if anyone’s interested  
E: let’s talk sex toys  
T: HOW ABOUT NO!  
J: …...I’m curious  
C: still got that thing Draal wanted to use on ya, when’s he gonna come pick it up? Or does he want me to deliver the goods  
J: not sure, talk to him  
C: just tell him! you’re stuck on the dam bull!  
J: hehe ;p noooo no thinking for my bull! I want him to be mindless and relaxed with me while we listen to slipknot  
C: well fuck me bonkers sally may come to pay up the bee keeper waxy taxy

E: THERE HE GOES AGAIN!  
J: racing thru my brain  
T: and I just can’t contain  
J: this feelin that remains  
C: there she blows, there she blows again  
J: pulsing thru my vein  
T: and I just can’t contain  
J: this feelin that remains  
C: there she goes, there she goes again  
J: she calls my name, pulls my train  
T: no-one else can heal my pain  
J: and I just can’t contain  
T: this feelin that remains  
J: there she goes  
T: there she goes again  
J: chasing down my lane  
T: and I just can’t contain  
C: this feelin that remains

 

C: beautiful  
J: we should start our own cover band  
T: I call base  
E: so we’re just gonna fucking ignore the gremlin?!  
J: the lion king is just lion hamlet  
T: o.o it is TOO EARLY for mind explosions!  
E: how is that a mind explosion?  
T: Jim, I swear to god, if you don’t close your curtains I am going to report you to the cops for crimes against me  
E: crimes against Toby and his people  
J: my ancestors smile upon me right now. Can you say the same?

 

………………………………………………………………………………..

LATER THAT DAY!

 

T: hooollyyy shiittt  
E: wut  
T: I just talked to Draal  
E: why?  
T: cause we’re friends?  
E: oh  
T: what you didn’t think we were?  
E: honestly, no. I just assumed he and you just knew each other and that was kinda it  
T: I mean we don’t go out and do stuff together, we talk tho, and we’ve shared adventures and fights together!  
C: oh my fucking god. I just found the little gremlin taking selfies of himself in his little car with my phone. He has his own dam phone! Ohh but guess what, he lost it. Now he’s stealing this every time I turn around!  
E: life be like that sometimes  
T: ANYWAYS sooo I just realized that Jim, and his mom, are both into older men  
E: HAHAHHA TOTALLY TRUE!  
C: wow.  
T: like mother like son! Both married outside their species, both older men!  
E: kinda cute that they’re so similar. I wish I was dating an older guy  
ST: you are?  
E: yeah by like, 3 months!  
ST: I can be a sugar daddy too!  
E: then fork over the cash!  
T: true love  
E: dam right!  
C: does no one else miss when things were normal?  
T: when the hell was that? Before the amulet or after everything ended and Jim got trolled  
C: alright point taken  
E: WHERE’S THE CASH STEVE!?

 

……………………………………………………………………..

 

Jim was sitting at the counter getting his fur brushed by his ever so loving mother. Noten sitting on the counter cramming brunch materials, aka food (friend always calls it that) into his mouth. Walt sipped coffee and Draal ate like the endless void he is. Claire and Toby ate together in the living room  
“Sweetie you have so many knots in you. I need to get another bottle of detangler” Noten snorted  
“that’s not the only kind of knot he’s had in him”  
“that is NOT an appropriate conversation topic at this table”  
“what? it’s true! I’ve always been taught to say the truth! The hard, thick truth!” Draal said between a bite  
“it is rather large”   
“boys. Enough.” Toby wiped his mouth and gave Noten a glare  
“shes right! No being a perv here! Why are you even here?!”  
“aye! I never get to come over for this! I wanted to try me besties food in the mid morning! it’s the best I’ve ever had. Could use some socks though...” Jim just looked over and smirked  
“no. I’m not adding it”  
“aw. Poo. You should be entertainin your guests right proper”  
“how about I take your food away?”  
“wah.”  
“and convince everyone not to let you throw another party until next year”  
“alright! Alright no need to bring out the nasty weapons”

 

 

………………………………………………………………

LATER THAT DAY!

T: I think I want to learn how to create life  
J: y?  
T: so I can create an army of whatever I want!  
C: sounds….reasonable?  
T: and I’ll be the ONLY ONE who will know how to create life!  
J: Tobes, most people can create life. I can if Draal just shoots his goo up into my gutz, boom I made life. Same goes with Eli and Claire and Shannon and Darci and Mary and pretty much anyone with a uterus  
T: except yours would be called a dude-erus  
E: duderus? I told Steve that and he laughed. I also said that he won’t be laughing 9 months from now. He didn’t get it at first and then panicked like crazy. I told him he’s not gonna be a dad, he collapsed onto my bed and said it was the biggest scare he’s ever felt in his life  
J: hahaha, will be totally opposite for Draal. He would prob roar out something like ‘MY SEED HAS TAKEN ROOT!’ and then want to celebrate with fighting a shit load of people  
C: at this point is fighting people just what he always wants to do and finds any excuse he can use to justify it?  
J: that makes the most sense out of everything I have ever come to know and understand in this lifetime  
E: Steve says he wants to make his own gang. Matching leather jackets with spikes, sunglasses, the works  
J: I AM SO DOWN FOR PUNK ROCK ELI  
C: the boy is too pure to ever be able to pull anything like that off  
E: I am NOT PURE!  
J: you are the cutest, purest thing on earth. You’re as if someone turned an innocent baby animal into a person  
E: I AM NOT CUTE! I CAN BE EVIL!  
T: mmmmmmhhhhhh most evil thing you’ve ever done is have a book past due return date  
E: a MONTH past due! That’s pretty hardcore!  
J: you make Draal look like a wimp  
E: exactly!

 

……………………………………………………………………….……

LATER THAT DAY!

 

J: Draal’s dick likes me better than he does Draal  
T: whyyy say this?  
D: it is sad, but very truthful  
E: #Steve  
T: at this point I fear whenever I look at anything you say Jimbo  
J: GOOD. FEAR ME!  
C: Jim you were literally chasing a laser pointer dot for 10 minutes straight earlier  
D: it was quite adorable  
J: I FELT THE OVERWHELMING URGE TO KILL IT  
T: we should get Jim and my cats into one big room and watch them all go crazy at the same time  
J: I AM NOT A CAT!  
T: I mean….  
C: well….  
E: eh….  
D: he is far too lovely to be a feline. He tastes better too  
J: ;p better than any pussy you’ve ever had  
D: I agree  
T: god. These jokes.  
D: jokes? What do you mean?  
E: HAHAHAHA  
C: god.  
D: I do not understand  
J: it’s nothing my mate, it’s nothing

………………………………………………………..

LATER THAT DAY!

 

ST: HELP!  
T: ?  
C: ?  
J: ?  
ST: ELI’S TRYING TO MAKE ME DO ADULT THINGS!  
C: like what?  
ST: hes trying to talk about tax reports and financial investments for the future! I'm a child in an adults body! i can't do this!"  
C: funny, Eli is an adult in a child’s body. PUSSY UP AND DO YOUR SHIT"  
ST: pussy?  
C: the pussy is one of the strongest things on this earth  
J: totally  
ST: well anyways no fair! Jim doesn't have to worry about this stuff!"  
J: =P  
E: do NOT cry for help weakling! Come back upstairs and stop hiding in the kitchen! Face the facts of life!  
ST: NO YOU DO IT ALL!  
E: I legally can’t do anything! we’re not married!  
ST: hmmmm…...no work ever again…  
J: hey, maybe he can kill a bunch of people for you, then carve each others names into yourselves like Draal and I did!  
T: can I be the flower girl?  
C: I wanted to be the flower girl!  
T: fite me!

 

…………………………………….……………………………………

LATER THAT DAY!

 

J: >=(  
T: wut wrong buddy?  
J: Eli.  
C: what’s up with the pure child?  
J: I have never seen a more ungrateful bottom!  
T: ?  
J: he said he wished he had more than one Steve because he wondered if it would technically be an orgy or just two people masturbating each other a lot  
E: stop looking at me from across the table like that!  
J: you take the dicks you’re given and be thankful!  
E: I CAN HAVE A FANTASY WITHOUT BEING RIDICULED TROLLBOY!  
J: there are some dicks you just can’t unsuck  
E: there’s dicks you can’t NOT suck  
J: touche

…………………………………..…………………………

LATER THAT DAY!

 

ST: okay, back me up here. I was saying how plenty of things in life are free to buttsnack but he won’t agree!  
T: why do you still call him that name?  
ST: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)>⌐■-■  
C: omg gross  
T: I don’t get it  
ST: skate fast eat ass  
E: haha very funny. AND EVERYONE HERE AGREE WITH ME! NOTHING IN LIFE IS FREE!  
T: the spirit of adventure is free  
C: love is all around us, love is free!  
J: sex is free….sometimes  
D: everything is free if no one’s around to stop you  
C: AYYEEE ALSO IF NO ONE’S LOOKIN! Also taking it without paying  
E: shoo gremlin! Get off of Claire’s phone!  
C: skate ass eat fast!  
ST: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)>⌐■-■

 

……………………………………………………………

LATER THAT DAY!

 

J: wow. I just found this old project I was supposed to do haha  
T: YEAH I KNOW I’M THE ONE WHO SUFFERED FROM THE GRADE LOSS!  
J: haha...oops…..well...haven’t really worked on that for like, a hot minute  
T: A HOT MINUTE?! IT’S BEEN LIKE A COLD HOUR!  
E: stop troll shaming Jim!  
T: DON’T YOU COME INTO THIS!  
E: make me leave!  
T: YOU READY TO FUCKING DIE?!  
E: I’M A BAD BITCH YOU CAN’T KILL ME  
J: I love my friends  
T: QUIET YOU ORAL FIXATED TROLL TWINK!  
J: =O gay gasp!

 

……………………………………………………….

 

LATER THAT DAY!

 

C: I am in fact the vape master  
E: where’s my proof?  
T: what the hell happened to your phone? Why do you keep stealing Claire’s?  
C: I uh, may or may not have lost it at an orgy-book club meetin I mean. Yeah. Book club.  
E: why not an orgy AT a book club?  
C: ‘snaps fingers’ now you’re on to somthin...gotta jot that down right quick  
J: uugughghgh MY FURRRRR  
C: still freaked out over it?  
E: wha happan?  
C: we was playin around with one of them electro balls and besties fur poofed up and went all crazy. It was amazing. Here lemme send a pic ‘pic sent’  
E: that’s amazing  
J: THIS IS THE WORST TIME I HAVE EVER TRIED TO KEEP MY FUR UNDER CONTROL, IT’S LIKE CEMENTED!  
C: ahahaha!

 

……………………………………………………………….

THAT NIGHT!

 

Draal was laying on his back in the living room groaning, eyes half closed, in immense pleasure. Jim was smiling and rubbing his stomach. Jim had told Walt and his mom to go out on a date, Jim wanted to cook. He convinced them by saying it would be good for them to have some alone time without any craziness! Also Jim wanted to make a special treat for Draal. He was going to attempt to cook some of Ballustras recipes. THAT really made them rush out the door saying they won’t be home until late enough to where all the nasty nasty was cleaned up. No need to even witness what horrors were about to occur. Jim did his best, mostly not to gag and become deathly ill simply by being within the same mile of the….food. Draal was in absolute heaven. His mate lovingly making his favorite food, just for him! He stuffed himself to the point of no return. He had no regrets. For the first time in a long time, he had eaten too much.  
"so. you full big guy?"  
"mmmmhmmmmm"  
"man you really were crazy, looked like a shark feeding frenzy"  
"i don't know what that is or means. But I'm going to assume it's good"  
"speaking of good....you up for a little action?"  
"i do not feel capable of training"  
"nooo i meant sex"  
"..i....i cannot....i am much too full for you to climb me, or for me to be on top...i cannot move without feeling immensely ill"  
"awww oookay...how about a blow job?"  
"what's that? i don't think i can do any kind of occupation at the moment"  
"i pleasure you with my mouth Draal"  
"ooohhh...i would very much enjoy this"  
"hmm...how are we gonna do this...you shoot almost too much for me to swallow in one go....don't want to stain everything and just make a big mess...well, I’ll figure it out as I go along. Alright, take that kilt off”  
“i……..cannot move”  
“fiiinee then let me do it”

……………………………………………………………...


	22. Barbara can't leave for the weekend. life is hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barbara. plz. don't leave. come back DON'T LET THEM ALL DIE
> 
> Eli sit your ass down
> 
> aww Noten, of course they love you!
> 
> Jim...hmm....maybe....don't let draal do that anymore...
> 
> JIM. DONT. BE. A. COCK. TEASE.
> 
> SAME FOR YOU ELI
> 
> well. there you go walt. you just haaad to mention it, now didn't you? NOW LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO JIM!
> 
> Draal. those aren't what dick pics are.....just.....never mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTHIN TO SAY RN OTHER THAN I LOVE MY READERS AND HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY/NIGHT =D

T= Toby J=Jim D=Draal C=Claire E=Eli ST=Steve NT=Noten

 

(obviously XD)

 

T: morning kings and queens let’s keep it mindful and sexy today!  
J: kk!  
T: Hey, you. You’re finally awake. Walked right into that imperial ambush, same as us, and that thief over there.  
NT: speaking of, is it bad if you stay up for 2 days straight and feel fine?  
C: GO TO BED. YOU’RE LOOSING YOUR MIND! YOU MUMBLE ALL THE TIME AND KNOCK EVERYTHING OVER LIKE A DUCKING CAT!  
J: ducking?  
C: AUTO CORRECT, YOU GET WHAT I MEAN  
j: STOP YELLING! THIS IS WHY I CRY!  
T: STOP MAKING JIM CRY!  
NT: yeah! don’t have the poor boy weep! he’s already got dem emotional issues!  
J: I MIGHT BE GOING INTO HEAT SOON SO MY EMOTIONS ARE GONNA EXPLODE! AND YOU’RE NOT HELPING!  
T: YEAH CLAIRE!  
E: STOP PICKING ON CLAIRE  
ST: STOP PICKING ON JIM  
J: I actually yelled irl and Draal looked at me weird  
T: lol  
T: Jim just blep at the window  
J: p= blep  
E: take a pic I wana see  
E: aww what a cute kitty  
J: p= blep!  
C: so are you still coming over?  
E: can’t gotta do stufff  
ST: including me?  
E: no  
ST: D=  
E: I’m busy! Go do yourself!  
ST: it isn’t as fun!  
J: he’s right the second you have someone do you, doing yourself is never the same again  
C: ew  
T: ew  
J: OH LIKE BOTH OF YOU NEVER GOT OFF BEFORE?!  
NT: ohhh trust me. Sis got what she needs.  
C: STOP GOING THROUGH MY STUFF  
NT: stop havin intrestin stuff  
J: it really is your fault Claire  
C: I WILL RIP YOUR HORNS OUT AND SHOVE THEM UP YOUR ASS  
NT: kinky~ can I film it?  
J: hmm….maybe  
C: I miss human Jim  
J: eh  
C: EH?!  
J: wut? it’s kinda fun bein half troll! And horrible  
T: Jam chomp!  
J: chomp!  
E: wut he chomp?  
T: this big metal thing, what is it anyways?  
J: old laptop  
T: cool  
E: wut it taste like?  
J: gud  
C: ARE YOU COMING OVER?! NEED TO KNOW RN! MOM’S ASKING!  
T: yeah  
J: yee!  
ST: goin out doin hetero stuff, can’t make it  
J: hetero?  
E: he means football, looking at sports equipment at the mall, and then going to a hardware store  
ST: ALSO looking at cars!  
J: bet I can run faster than whatever car you see  
E: Jim you can jump from rooftop to rooftop like someone playing jump rope  
J: =o think I might be good at jump rope?  
T: nah, horns would get stuck  
J: poo yeah  
C: come over whenever, wait is Draal coming?  
J: do you want him to?

 

 

C: I mean….i don’t want to be rude and say no….  
J: he would understand don’t worry! Not like walking around your house and being social is his greatest strength  
C: he doesn’t mind if I say no to him?  
T: are you more afraid of him being upset, or being upset and fighting you  
C: I can kick his ass  
T: hmmm….  
C: oh like YOU can do better?!  
T: I mean, I can kick YOUR ASS  
J: I can kick my own ass!  
NT: mum wants you to come downstairs and help  
C: alright, I gtg come over within the hour if that’s cool  
T: yee!  
J: yee! And nah he won’t be upset, only time Draal is upset is when I say he can’t come to something he clearly could  
C: kk, tell him I’m sorry  
J: no need, he understands  
E: ‘sigh’ why can’t a certain someone be as kind as this to HIS wife?  
ST: WE AREN’T MARRIED!  
E: AND WHO’S FAULT IS THAT?!  
J: blep

 

…………………………………………………………………

Claire, Jim, Toby, and Noten were hanging out in Claire’s room. Jim was currently eating an ice cream cone, trying to use his tongue to lick his cheek. Claire tossed him a napkin, annoyed.  
“just use this”  
“nu I hot it!” Toby took a picture  
“look upon this. the mighty trollhunter, in all his glory, using his tongue to lick his cheek"  
“holo ot it!”  
“JUST WIPE IT OFF!” Noten stood on a counter, sunglasses on, ‘risque’ worded shirt on, annoyingly sucking on ice through a straw. Claire turned over to him and gave him a glare  
“really annoying me”  
“mmhmmm”  
“get out!”  
“hmmm…..no”  
"don’t make me put you in gay baby jail!"  
"whats the diff between that and regular baby jail?" Jim licked his cheek finally and said with jazz hands  
"gay baby jail is more fabulous!"  
“so, unlike you then?”  
“you can’t hurt me, my amulet is gucci”  
“me sunglasses are too” he said with a smug smile and a small adjustment to them. Claire rolled her eyes and threw a pillow at her adopted brother  
“get out! Go do something else! Go to bed for the first time!”  
“hmm...nah….well FINE! I know when I’m not wanted” he pretended to sniffle and make little cries  
“no you don’t.”  
“aww fine! I’m leavin. I’ll go play with the baby then”  
"no! you're a terrible influence!"  
“whhaaaaa me? I’m the best!"  
"you were teaching him how to count cards!"  
"hey! it's gonna come in handy later on"  
“he’s a baby!”  
“perfect time for a good old learnin from a pro!” Claire threw another pillow at him  
“okay! Fine, I’m leavin! Geez...someone needs to use that new toy. Get herself to calm dow-”  
“LEAVE!”

 

He left the room with a snicker. Claire rubbed her face and sighed, wishing her brother would somehow vanish.  
“you know, this is never how I pictured how my life would be right now” Jim laid on his back, folding his arms behind his head and looked up at Claire’s ceiling  
“same here. Well, i never thought this is how my life would end up. not that I’m complaining, i just didn’t expect to protect two worlds, become a hybrid, end up being married to a troll, have 4 dads, 2 moms, and one grumpy old goat grandpa” Toby looked at him annoyed  
“gee. So many family members. Must be really tough. isn’t it. Cool beans huh.”  
“hey! Blinky and Arrrg think you’re their son too! So you have two dads. Also grumpy old goat grandpa counts too!”  
“fine. Not like I have a human mom, a troll mother in law, a changeling stepdad, and a ghost father in law” Jim chuckled a bit and took off his jacket. Toby and Claire’s attention suddenly shifted to the nasty bite marks on him, seen through his shirt  
“geez Jim what happened?!”  
“what?”  
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT! ALL THOSE NASTY MARKS IN YOUR CHEST, SKIN AND NECK!”  
“ohhh, Draal learned what hickey’s are and wanted to try giving them to me. Human affection thing. And well….sharp shark like teeth and big mouth vs me”  
“do they...hurt?”  
“not anymore. Did at first though. Draal said he was sorry and didn’t mean to hurt me, I told him it was fine. He wanted to try something loving. Besides, I’ll heal up pretty quickly”  
“geez, he really….tried….a lot...” Claire sucked air through her teeth then added  
“he really put...effort into it..”  
“yeah, but like I said, it’s whatever” Jim sighed a small bit and looked worried. Claire noticed it easily and asked about the sudden change in attitude  
“you okay? Want me to brush your fur? That always cheers you up”  
“I’m fine, ohhh I would loove that actually!”  
“why the look then?”  
“oh...uh….well….mom has to go to this doctor out of town meeting thingy for the weekend, just kinda worried”  
“I’m sure she’ll be alright”  
“oh noooo not her, I’m worried about Draal and Walt. I’m going to be the ONLY thing to keep them from killing each other, or at least calm Draal down and keep Walt from antagonizing him. Gonna take sooo much work. And the second I leave the room?! Might have to make sure both are never alone together”

 

Toby tapped the side of Jim’s leg  
“Well, on the bright side, I just got a special novelty sandwich suitcase”  
“oh? Neat”  
“so when I use it...it’s….really gonna be….jammed pack”  
“god Tobes I have never hated you more in my entire life” the three of them laughed together, it was going to be a fun day!

 

……………………………………………………………………………

Jim was purring. Eyes closed and enjoying himself. Claire was brushing his fur in the living room, Toby on his phone checking messages and occasionally sending dank memes to Eli. Noten was sitting in a chair quietly, drinking and reading a book, only to have a dirty magazine under it.  
“mmhhh~ you always brush me sooo nicely~”  
“well, that’s what happens when you’ve dealt with long hair all your life. You pick up a few tricks” Noten giggled and said  
“i love you” Claire looked over to the oddly passive changeling with a questionable glance  
“is that you talking or the alcohol”  
“i ain’t drinkin!…..and it’s me talking to the alcohol”  
“you’re an alcoholic”  
“i can’t stop anytime I want!”  
“it’s 10am!”  
“and? Not like I c-”  
“can ruin your liver because it’s stone I GET IT you always use that excuse!” Noten just shrugged  
“hey, it’s true”

 

 

……………………………………………………………..

 

Barbara was moving around trying to get ready, already running late. She was quickly throwing everything together and packing her bags. Walt was helping her out here and there, trying to speed things along  
“are you SURE you’re going to be okay?”  
“yes, don’t worry”  
“You know how Draal gets”  
“i do. I can handle our big blue child”  
“Jim won’t always be around”  
“I’m an adult, I can handle things. You worry too much, you act like the house will be destroyed when you come back home”  
“to be fair….it’s happened before….a few different times”  
“touche”  
“running late already, day’s hardly started and I’ve begun to fail”  
“relax. Breathe”  
“i am I am. I’m more worried ab-”  
“about Draal, Jim, and I?”  
“know me too well”  
“either that or it’s been the only thing on your mind all morning”  
“can you blame me?”  
“well, I know how to handle trolls. This may come as a shock to you. But I’ve dealt with them all my life”  
“how do you plan on dealing with Draal if you two are alone together for more than a minute and a half?”  
“easy. He’s a monger. There are 3 ways to always pacify them perfectly”  
“those would be?”  
“the first sending them into what would be called a food coma, Something Draal enjoys doing quite often. Jim has no problems with helping that to happen. The second, a deep sleep via post sexual activities. We both know how frisky Draal can be, so that will be often as well. And last but not least, the third is confusing them” Draal came into the kitchen, getting something to eat  
“perfect time to demonstrate" Walt looked over to Draal and called for his attention  
"Draal, please answer me this. This example is having to save Jim from certain death in a fight”  
“easy enough to answer. Go on”  
“now, the fight that could end Jim’s life must be finished before it started. It will happen while in the very middle of it however, the only way to prevent the fighting is to not fight whatsoever while engaging in brutal combat. The way of defeating the opponent is to not defeat them at all, how do you defeat an opponent without defeating them and end up saving Jim’s life in the process?"

Draal went wide eyed and became terribly confused. He blinked a few dozen times and shifted his eyes around. He started to try and count on his fingers, mumbling to himself. He looked up at Walt and groaned  
“i...do not understand….”  
“alright, how do you save Jim if you’re fighting him while he can only fight himself after but before fighting you” Draal’s eyes grew even wider. He mumbled and groaned  
“i….you have….i can’t...you….the fight…winning...is….but...the battle....” Barbara sighed  
“great. You broke Draal. Draal sweetie, just forget about it. It doesn’t matter right now, here, come sit down and watch a movie” Draal just nodded, totally out of mind. She put a movie on for him and turned back to Walt  
“alright, you made your point. I can see all three working for two days. Okay, got my bags, got my paperwork, got my information, got my pass, got my list, said goodbye to Jim earlier”  
“all that’s left is saying goodbye to Draal, me driving you to the airport, and then you’ll be on your way”  
“am I missing anything?”  
“no. relax, you have everything”  
“okay...okay….Draal, remember when I said I was leaving for the weekend?”  
“yes”  
“I’m leaving now, okay?”  
“ohhh okay, goodbye. When will you be returning home?”  
“after the weekend. Now, behave, please”  
“i will”  
“please”  
“i will”  
“okay. Alright time for the airport”

 

…………………………………………………………………………

 

It was noon now, Claire, Jim, Draal, and Toby walked the streets of trollmarket, helping out here and there. Draal huffed out through his nose  
“-then he asked me to answer him. It was such a difficult question”  
“well, mate, don’t worry, it wasn’t important”  
“it was a question about saving your life. I failed. I should know better.”  
“relax! It was just some dumb question”  
“what if something happens where I have no idea how to save yourself from...erm...yourself!”  
“we’ll deal with it when it happens, if it ever does, which I highly doubt” a troll was waving an arm to get their attention up ahead  
“mate why don’t you go check what the guy needs real fast, meet us over at Blinky and Arrrg’s” Draal nodded and split off.  
“kinda wish I was there to see his face” Toby was finishing up a taco and replied  
“why?”  
“whenever he’s really confused, he always gets this look on his face. I always imagine the only thing going through his head is the AOL dial up tone”  
“that sounds amazing” while the three walked they came across none other than Vendel! Sitting at a table reading and drinking out of a mug  
“hey V”  
“hello trollhunter who can’t even bother saying my full name, and his two friends who never seem to do anything else with their time instead of following you around not minding their own business”  
“Geez. Who ruined your morning”  
“my sour mood has been created by none other than Ballustra”  
“oh, is she here?”  
“no. thankfully. She was here earlier this morning, made a mess of things, and left back to the monger home. Thankfully she has been staying there more often than here. Now, leave me be. I would really rather have some alone time.” So, the three trollhunters quickly made their exit after saying a quick goodbye.

 

As they came to Blinky and Arrrg’s home, the familiar sounds of various drama TV shows aired on a small TV in front of Dic’s chair. The three said hello to the grouchy old troll, who hardly said hello back  
“thanks for the effort”  
“yes...hello….welcome”  
“can you at least pretend to put in a little emotional effort?”  
“good job, A plus, you get a pat on the head for saying a basic greeting”  
“i see you’re enjoying your show”  
“TRYING to enjoy it”  
“well...always good to do something fun, so you just gonna sit in your chair all day, like usual?”  
“yes”  
“why not do anything else?”  
“because death is inevitable and will one day take us all”  
“oooh okay. No kindness from you sour old troll”  
“fine, kindness, has anyone ever said you were beautiful?”  
“Draal, sometimes”  
“well, he’s a decent liar at least” Toby gasped and smiled  
“OH SHIT!” Claire slapped Toby for that  
“leave the cranky old blind troll alone. let’s go.”  
“yes. Please leave. Oh, before you do. Trollhunter, I give you a call”  
“okay...what’s your call?” Dic shook his mug  
“fill this up please. Trollhunters must answer every call”

 

Jim sighed and snatched the drink out of his hand and answered the call! Afterwards, team trollhunter went on an adventure! Meaning they went through trollmarket, talked, laughed, had fun, answered some ‘very important’ call to action! Training and eventually parted ways and headed home for the day….

 

……………………………………………..

T: Hey guys, look at this weird cat I found ‘pic sent’  
C: Toby. That’s just a picture of Jim trying to lick ice cream off his nose  
J: meow!  
T: ah! I fed it and now it’s following me home! Shoo! Scram!  
J: meow! OwO feed me more pwease!  
C: oh god not this again.  
E: aww cute cat!  
T: poor stray. Found on the cold lonely streets, taking it home with me, giving it a nice warm safe place to live out the rest of its days  
J: OwO  
E: such a saint, pure of heart  
T: it’s a boy cat! Just found out!  
E: how?  
T: he told me, oh he can do tricks too! ‘pic sent’  
C: Toby that’s a picture of Jim wearing an upside down hat  
T: BALANCING an upside down hat!  
E: oh we should give him a name!  
T: whiskers?  
E: fuzzy?  
T: sir blueberry muffin!  
J: ?  
E: he is blueberry colored  
J: oh god I am aren’t I?!  
T: sir blueberry muffin it is! Aww such a cute kitty! Loves being scratched! ‘pic sent’  
E: he looks like he’s having an orgasm  
J: I might be  
C: Noten keeps trying to whisper something but he won’t just say it. He’s wearing sunglasses and I think he’s passed out but it’s always hard to tell with him  
T: sir blueberry muffin is grooming himself. AND shedding his fur everywhere!  
J: My bad  
C: are you right next to each other?!  
T: yee!  
C: why can’t you be normal?  
J: when. Have we. EVER been normal?  
T: we’ve had this conversation before  
ST: I NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOUR DICK IS LIKE JIM  
J: well, unexpected  
ST: I JUST FOUND OUT TROLL DICKS ARE INSIDE OF THEM LIKE LIZARDS AND YOU’RE HALF TROLL, PLUS TROLLS HAVE KNOTS. WHAT IS YOUR DICK LIKE?!  
J: I’ll never tell~  
ST: DO IT TROLLBOY  
T: I know what it looks like  
ST: WHAT?!  
C: ew, why?  
J: showed him  
C: again, why?  
ST: SHOW ME!  
J: well, we were at a pool, went to go clean off, he saw me naked, no biggie  
T: geez, you’re acting like it’s such a big deal Claire  
C: guys don’t just show each other their dicks!  
C: never mind, what am I saying? Of course they do  
T: I don’t care about nudity, we don’t need to make a big deal about it  
J: exactly why it wasn’t weird! Besides, we’ve seen each other naked before. Before you ask, cause we don’t care, we’re best friends, and things just happen to cause nudity. For example, changing in front of each other. We don’t make a big deal about it. And yes when I was human as well  
ST: TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DICK ALREADY  
ST: my bad, caps was stuck, just unstuck it, still! Tell me!  
C: why do you care so bad?  
ST: I’M CURIOUS!  
C: caps stuck again?  
ST: no that time I was actually just yelling  
T: the cat is purring when I pet him, such a cute big weird blueberry cat!  
J: meow!  
T: geez, really is his shedding season  
J: yeah, sorry about that, mom was complaining the other day about it  
T: going to have to carry around a lint roller from now on.  
T: speaking of, tonight, there’s the new BBQ place downtown, just opened up, everything is suuuper cheap rn, you guys want in? I’m heading there with Jim  
ST: sounds great! Nothing finishes off a heterosexual day like ribs and steak sauce!  
T: you bringing Eli?  
ST: I think he’s still on his vegetarian diet, or vegan, or some hippy crap. Lemme get him

 

E: no, I’m not on a diet, just don’t like meat really  
J: you don’t like protein? Weird, just from looking at you, you’d think otherwise  
ST: haha  
E: I’m tired, had a looong day with my mom, I could make some dick joke ‘haha Steve’s meat is the only thing I love, and I get plenty of protein from jizz’ but I’m too tired. I need friend time  
ST: aww poor bby, want daddy to be with you~?  
E: eh, he’s as dull as a rock. Also I don’t want to bring my dad  
T: HAHAHAHAH! ALSO JIM JUST CHOKED ON HIS SODA  
J: OH GOD IT BURNS!  
C: I’m coming along. Noten is bugging me to go, mostly because he’s going to ‘go to a friends place’. I didn’t want to ask anything. But he told me to pick him up some wings if they have any  
T: kk, everyone meet at the park  
C: want the girls to come along?  
T: Jim and Eli are already coming  
C: haha. Funny. You know what I mean  
T: sure if they want  
C: just asked, Mary has yet another hookup, Shannon is doing something involving legal things...she...didn’t specify...weirdly….and Darci has to be with her dad doing some family stuff  
T: team trollhunter it is then!  
J: want a troll to tag along?  
T: nooooooooooooooooo  
C: why not just talk to each other if you’re RIGHT THERE  
J: then no one else would know about what we’re saying! Why can’t my bull come along? D’=  
T: he’s going to eat out everything! There won’t be anything left!  
J: hmmmm….good point….I’ll just bring him back something  
T: alright, everyone meat up at like, 5:30  
T: get it?  
E: I hate you  
C: same  
J: booooo  
T: fine.  
E: anyways, sounds gud!  
ST: K  
C: mhm!  
J: yeet!

 

………………………………………………………………….

 

Team trollhunter ate food together and laughed and did college kid stuff

(idk, I’m a social introvert so they do whatever it is they do XD)

 

Toby raised a small glass of water  
“a toast to us and our awesome friendships! Bottoms up!” Eli and Jim stood up and took a sip. Toby gave them a weird look, Jim smiled and replied  
“what? You said ‘bottoms up’”  
“i didn’t mean it like that!” they laughed and sat back down. Eli ate a hot dog in one go, wiggling his eyebrows at Steve, who choked on his water. Toby just rolled his eyes  
“no one likes a cock tease Eli” Jim wiped his mouth, then ate the napkin, he awkwardly smiled and added  
“yeah….I’ve done it to Draal...by accident”  
“how do you ‘accidentally’ be a cock tease?”  
“well...”

 

FLASHBACK TO A FEW YEARS INTO THE PAST!

 

Draal was standing against the counter, sharpening his ax. Jim ran into the room  
“Draal! Draal!”  
“yes my trollhunter?”  
“look!” Jim had a large thick lollipop and slowly took the entire thing into his mouth and throat in one go. He slowly pulled it out with a wet pop. Draals arm stopped moving and his eyes went wide  
“i just learned I have NO GAG REFLEX ANYMORE!”  
“that….is…..interesting….”   
“OH IDEA! let’s play a game!”  
“a game?”  
“you give me the biggest, thickest thing you have! I take it and see how long I can have it in for! Whatever you can give me to cram down my throat! The bigger the better! Come on! I know you can give me SOMETHING to stuff my throat with! You have SOMETHING don’t you? Please give it to me! I need it! Watch me stuff it down my throat!” Draals eyes went as wide as possible, he dropped his ax and shook his head with a small growl. He picked it back up and quickly exited the room  
“you getting something for me to put down my throat?”  
“i uh...must...polish...my...ax...”  
“you just were”  
“a...uh...different one….in solitude...please do not disturb me” and with that, the basement door was shut and locked. Jim just shrugged and took the lollipop down once more

 

BACK IN THE PRESENT!

 

Eli was laughing hard at the story  
“geez Jim!”  
“what?! I didn’t know what he felt for me!”  
“so, he went to polish his ax huh?”  
“now thinking about, he really DID polish it” the two laughed together while Toby and Claire shared a look of annoyance  
“trying to eat here guys. Steve, can you PLEASE help?” Steve wasn’t paying attention, he was looking off into the distance, totally not being aware of anything  
“well, that alpha’s out of the question.” Jim scarfed down another hot dog. He smiled as a few other fun memories of the past came up. All cringy now.  
“you know, Draal really is a horrible liar” Claire shook her head in agreement and swallowed her food before adding  
“oh yeah, he can’t lie to save his life. I asked him something the other day and he just looked at me like he was thinking of if he should kill me or find the nearest exit”  
“knowing him, it might have been both”  
“oh yeah totally. So what brought that thought up?”  
“just remembering cute dumb things we’ve done together. He has that one nervous look he gets when someone asks him something. it’s adorable. Plus it’s nice to know when he’s lying or not. Like when my cloths mysteriously vanish”  
“and end up in a trolls stomach”  
“speaking of, I gotta get going, my bull is prob getting hangry. Without mom nearby, he’s going to look at Walt and see red” So Jim left after saying his goodbyes and giving hugs. 

 

He quickly went home and opened the door to Draal sitting quietly watching a movie  
“hey mate” Draal grew a very large and wide smile, joy overcoming him as he saw Jim  
“ah! Hello mate! I missed you”  
“i missed you too, where’s Walt?”  
“the impur-Walt is off doing his...hm...what did he call it? Busy paperwork? He said I wouldn’t understand beuracry. So I didn’t bother to ask”  
“it’s bureaucracy-never mind. Alright, well then. You hungry? I brought you some foood!” Jim handed him the bag, which Draal ate in a single bite  
“mh!”  
“speaking of food...would my big bull like another feast like last time?”  
“oh, yes he would~” Jim walked into the kitchen, pulling out his phone and sending Walt a text  
‘making Ballustra’s food. Going to put Draal into a food coma for the night. Giving you a warning heads up to go eat someplace else. Had my own dinner, hopefully I don’t hurl it up’ and so, Jim cooked a large feast! Stuffing Draal until he felt too full. Once again he laid on his back groaning. Jim rubbing his belly and looking happily at how funny Draal was  
“so, big daddy Draal nice and full~?”  
“wait...am...i...a father?! FINALLY?!”  
“no it was just a sexy-never mind. Anyways, you nice and full big guy?”  
“can’t eat….another….bite”  
“let’s go upstairs, lay down together in our love nest~”  
“i…..am afraid...i...cannot preform”  
“it’s fine. Still, let’s go to bed”  
“you treat me….too….well...i….don’t….deserve...you”  
“hey, a good mate makes sure the other is happy”

 

……………………………………………………………………………………

It was the next morning, Barbara had woken up and was currently eating breakfast. She dialed her phone and called. Jim’s voice came from the other side of it in a chipper tone  
“hey mom”  
“hi sweetie, how is your morning?” as with the perfect timing, she heard roaring in the background  
“it’s uh, going good mom”  
“so how are my favorite boys doing?”  
“well..hey hey! You! Hush! Yes, yes I’ll say hello, Mom Dra-yes I’m saying it right now, Mom Draal says hello and good morning-yes I was about to say that, and that he wishes you a good day”  
“tell him I said the same….so was that him roaring or the TV?”  
“i think you know what it was. Well, everyone’s doing good, no one’s dead so...that’s a plus!”  
“i miss my boys so much already, I wish I was there”  
“hey, you’re coming back in like, a day and a half, besides, relax! Let us-put that down! No, don’t eat-and you did….alright NO DON’T SPIT IT OUT-just...hi sorry mom, Draal was-no don’t give me that face! No you’re not in troub-just! Go! Sit over there! Anyways, hi mom, we’re doing great. Let your hair down, relax, you hardly ever gets breaks from this chaos. no. spit it out. Hey! Hey I just bought that shirt! And you swallowed it. NO DON’T COUGH IT BACK UP! Just eat it! So uh, yeah mom how’d you sleep?”  
“wish I was there. I miss you three and my crazy mornings. It was so boring. Today, I managed to get breakfast, and am currently eating it without anything happening around me, boring right?”  
“i can’t even begin to imagine it. Walt says good morning and he loves you and all the good stuff”  
“tell him I said the same. I just heard a loud crash, is everything fine?”  
“just Dr-hey HEY! I saw that! Just Draal helping out around the house”  
“he’s always so thoughtful, so did he and Walt fight last night? I’m guessing yes”  
“no actually, I put Draal into a nice food coma, and everything went by smooth. Cooked a big feast of mommy in law’s food, don’t worry I manage to get the smell out of everything, told Walt to go out and get his own grub, and I ate with our little team at that new BBQ place that just opened up-alright I promise to take you too next time. No I wasn’t embarrassed about having you there, you just would have eaten everything. Besides, I made you your favorites! Oh, well, we can do that~ you go upstairs-OH SHIT SORRY MOM!”  
“it’s fine sweetie, well, go have fun, I’ll check up later. Keep the peace”  
“will do. Goodbye, love you”  
“love you too, stay safe”  
“will do” Barbara heard half a roar before clicking the hangup button. She smiled and looked at her breakfast, poking an omelet with her fork  
“i miss my boys”

 

Jim clicked the hangup button and turned around. Walt was saying something about Draal and his ‘helping habits’. Doing more harm than good. Draal roared back that his intentions were pure and he was doing far better than HE was! Jim groaned. Well, one thing to solve this little argument. Although, little is usually not so little in this home…

 

……………………………………………………………………………

Jim’s fur was still wet as he came downstairs, fresh from a shower. He walked into the kitchen and started to make something light and quick to eat. Walt took a sip of coffee and without looking up from his book started up a conversation  
“so. I take it all that noise was your involvement in calming the brute down?”  
“yeah, he’s sleeping off our ‘fun time’. Thought I would put him down for a few hours. Always works”  
“aren’t you such a saint. You work far better than any tranquilizer on him”  
“well thank you very much. Hope he keeps calm, if not, I might try to figure out some other way to distract him”  
“so kind of you to consider my own personal safety”  
“well, I like you, I also don’t want mom to be upset if she found out you died”  
“true enough”

 

A couple hours later, the three went about their lives doing regular plain mundane things. Then Draal went into Draal mode…

 

Walt was fishing around in the garage, until he found a small box of photos. He brought them into the living room and began sorting through them, catching the eye of Jim in the process  
“ohh photos, fun!”  
“i wondered where I’d put them, now I remember I didn’t want Draal to eat them so I kept them in a safe area” Draal snorted out in annoyance. He was about to speak up, but Jim shot him a glare, ending the comment before it even began.  
“So Walt, what are those pictures of?”  
“our honeymoon”  
“oh I was wondering when I’d finally get to see them! Not like you took many pictures on your phones”  
“you know me, old fashioned and all that” Jim sat down next to Walt looking at all of them. Draal started to get a bit uncomfortable, not knowing what was going on with a subject he knew nothing about.  
“what’s a honeymoon?” Jim’s mind suddenly had one thing run across it for a brief instance

‘oh no’ 

Walt looked up to Draal and started to explain. The entire time, Draal became more and more stressed.  
“a honeymoon is when a married couple goes on a small get away, a vacation, to start off their marriage. Typically they have it right after the wedding itself” Draal turned to Jim with wide eyes. Jim knew what was about to happen.

 

Draal moved as quickly as he could, he grabbed Jim bridal style and ran out the door, frantically looking around outside  
“Draal-”  
“must honeymoon! Must honeymoon!”  
“Draal-”  
“how could I not even THINK to do this?!”  
“Draal-”  
“i failed you! I failed AT THE VERY BEGINNING OF OUR MATEHOOD!”  
“Draal-”  
“must find place. Must find perfect place-”  
“DRAAL!” Draal looked down with nervous eyes  
“yes? I’m a failure. I know. It is unforg-” Jim kissed him to silence him. Then after pulling off he said warmly  
“it’s alright. I forgot too. it’s not a big deal”  
“it IS though! I was to give you NOTHING short of the PERFECT LIFE! I am a failure as a mate! I must restore my honor! We must honeymoon at once!”  
“well. We never did have on-”  
“exactly! So we must! Now….what should we do?

 

……………………………………………………………………….

 

It was the night now. The Nunez household. The family sat on the couch together watching a movie peacefully. The doorbell went off and Noten jumped off the couch  
“i got it! Hoping that’s the package I ordered. And before anyone asks, no it’s nothing of a more….adult nature. Just some basic things” He jumped up and twisted the doorknob, letting the door open up. A woman stood at the doorway and then screamed when she saw Noten  
“well gee. A good evenin to you too lady” Mrs. Nunez quickly got off the couch and walked over to the doorway, using her foot to push Noten aside  
“hello Margret!”  
“yes, hello...” The woman couldn’t help but stare at Noten, who just stuck his tongue out at her. Ophelia smiled and tried to push him away further  
“ignore him”  
“what...is he...who...is..he? I’ve never met...”  
“he’s my...adopted son”  
“how-”  
“it’s an incredibly long story. Anyways, I thought we were meeting at your home tomorrow-”

 

Noten rolled his eyes and left the two women to talk among one another. He grumbled a bit before hooping back onto the couch, taking his seat and continued watching. He crossed his arms and mumbled a bit to himself before Claire smacked him with a pillow  
“aye!”  
“shh! you’re mumbling again”  
“well gee, sorry.” Claire rolled her eyes and picked him up by the scruff, to which he complained and squirmed in an attempt to free himself from her grasp. She let him onto the counter in the kitchen where they could talk in private  
“what’s with you?”  
“what do you mean what’s with ME?”  
“is it what mom’s friend said?”  
“gee no shit.”  
“language”  
“sorry. Gee no fucking shit” Claire smacked him for that  
“aye!”  
“language!”  
“alright alright. Geez. I’m sorry if I’m being a grumpy butt because she gave me a weird look.”  
“you’re not normal. Get over it. But you’re OUR normal. No one else matters. Now stop being grumpy and come back and watch with us” she kissed him on the cheek and walked away. Noten smiled and felt better

 

……………………………………………………………………

 

J: heeyyyy anyone still up?  
NT: it’s 3am OF COURSE I’M UP!  
E: GRINDING IN VIDEOGAME, MUST GET EVERYTHING I NEED TO BE THE ULTRA GAY, POUNDING ENERGY DRINKS MORE THAN STEVE DOES ME, I CAN’T FEEL MY FACE  
NT: nice  
T: ‘slow claps’ thanks. Now I’m awake and can’t fall back to slepp  
J: it’s sleep  
T: I’M TIRED  
NT: pansy  
T: not all of us party all the time!  
NT: I honestly need like, 8 hours every 2 days or whatever  
J: wish I could do that  
C: GO TO SLEEP  
NT: NEVER  
J: guess who’s on their honeymoon?  
T: whhaaa?  
J: long story short, Walt just HAD to explain what one was, Draal looked at me as if the house was on fire and needed to get me to safety asap. Grabbed me and ran out the door, then said he needed to do one with me RIGHT NOW or else feel like a failure. So, well, I’m at this resort now  
T: lol? Nice?  
J: it’s nice. We tried meditation class today. Draal doens’t like it. Too calm and quiet. He fell asleep in the middle of it  
NT: I like being mindful from time to time  
C: ???????  
NT: what?! I like to appreciate everything I have and be thankful!  
T: before pounding down an entire bottle in one go  
NT: can you blame me?  
C: YES  
J: I was just a girl, looking at a boy, who broke a wall with a single punch because he thought I said it upset me  
E: I want Steve to break down walls for me in a single punch  
T: whhyyyyyyyyyy were you upset?”  
J: wasn’t. Just said I didn’t like what something said on a poster, and Draal went Draal style. Speaking of, I can’t sleep. I ALWAYS try to sleep on his chest, buuut he fell asleep on me. So here I am.  
NT: F  
E: F  
T: F  
C: ?  
E: sad air horns  
C: WHAT’S F?  
NT: F for sis  
T: F  
E: F

…………………………………………………………………….

It was the afternoon now. Barbara stretched after getting out of Walt’s car, the drive from the airport wasn’t very long, still nice to stretch though. She turned her keys into her front door and opened it, stepping inside and calling out hello. Only to get no reply  
“where’s the boys?”  
“honeymoon”  
“what?”  
“i mentioned what one was, Draal looked at Jim as if he were in mortal danger, grabbed him and ran out the house faster than anything else”  
“well, what brought that up?”  
“was looking over photos. Said where I’d taken them, our honeymoon. And well, now you’re caught up”  
“yeah that will do it with Draal. Well, any idea where they went?”  
“Jim updated me on his current status. The two are at some resort somewhere in the mountains. Well, at least they can get some fresh air”  
“well, suppose that just leaves us alone together for-wait how long did they say?”  
“hm. Jim said he was unsure. Well, best to enjoy our time together for as long as we can”

………………………………………………………………………………

Jim was enjoyed himself. Fresh crisp air. Fresh snowfall here and there. Warm drinks and Draal making giant snowmen for enjoyment. The relaxing atmosphere and calm serenity of nature. Everything was fantastic. Draal even made sure he only got into 3 fights! Truly passive for the time being. Jim couldn’t have enjoyed himself more, well, except when he was alone with Draal~

 

FUN DUMB JOKE MY FRIEND AND I MADE!

 

J: heyy mate, send me some dick pics  
D: pic sent  
J: no not dik-dik pics! DICK PICS  
D: pic sent  
J: no not dick cheney! DICK PICS  
D: pic sent  
J: okay now that’s just a cactus that LOOKS like a dick  
D: I’M CONFUSED!  
D: I’m sorry for yelling at you  
D: please forgive me!  
J: send me  
J: a picture  
J: of the thing  
J: between your legs.  
D: pic sent  
J: NOT. YOUR. KILT  
J: you know what, never mind. Come downstairs, dinner’s ready


End file.
